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Where Do We Go From Here
77 minutes | Jun 9, 2021
73: Obligation Sex and the Other Problems with Christian Sex Books
Move over Christian sex books, there's a rescue at hand. Sheila Wray Gregoire and her co-writers surveyed 20,000 Christian women, and what they found is shocking. If reading Love & Respect, the Act of Marriage, and others harmed you and your marriage, this is the episode for you. There is a way out of shame and obligation sex. Full show notes here Partner with us for $3/month to hear our recap of Miss Congeniality and get a ticket to this month's Green Room. Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter Sheila Wray Gregoire is passionate about changing the evangelical conversation about sex! A popular speaker, marriage blogger, and award-winning author of nine books, including The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex, and her latest book, The Great Sex Rescue, she wants to challenge Christians to go beyond pat answers on marriage to reach real intimacy. Sheila believes in authenticity, and gives real solutions to the very real and messy problems women, and couples, can face. Connect with Sheila on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.
74 minutes | Jun 2, 2021
72: The Truths & Myths of Dating a Non-Christian
Most of us who left Purity Culture know that there were two pieces of advice for successful relationships: Don't date a non Christian and don't have premarital sex. Ready for more? We tackle Christians dating non Christians today with data, practical truths and myths as well as your tender, truthful stories. Full show notes here Partner with us to hear this month's movie recap: Miss Congeniality! Does this hit from 2000 hold up in 2021? Sandra Bullock plus beauty pageant gave Jess & Devi lots to talk about. Instagram Twitter
46 minutes | May 26, 2021
71: "They Taught Me How To Be A Good Girl But Not How To Be A Woman"
Morgan Strehlow joins us to tell her Purity Culture story. The church taught her how to be a good girl and expected her to lead, but left her without the tools she needed to deal with growing up. With vulnerability Morgan tells us about the impact of purity culture and how she internalized the obligation sex message and what she's doing to move forward. Full show notes here Instagram Twitter Want a ticket to The Green Room so you can chat with Jess & Devi and other members of the community? On May 27 (28 in Australia) we are having our first monthly zoom call for Partners of the Show. Sign up by the 27th to join this month's call.
54 minutes | May 19, 2021
70: 3 Mistakes Christians Make When Reading the Bible
We've all heard "The Bible clearly says" from pastors and people we know, so how do we get better at understanding biblical texts? Theology professor and academic dean Dr. Michael Bird joins us to look at the three big mistakes we make when we read our Bibles. Yes we look at historical context and reading our present moment into an ancient document, but we also talk about pragmatic and ideal ethics. There's so much good stuff in here to equip you to be a better student of the Bible. Full Show Notes Here Partner with us for $3/month to hear a bonus episode with Michael Bird going through three New Testament texts: 1 Corinthians 11:2-12, Romans 16:1-7, and 1 Timothy 2:11-14. Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter Michael Bird is Academic Dean and Lecturer in Theology at Ridley College in Melbourne, Australia. He is an Anglican priest, author of more than 30 books on biblical and theological studies, including The New Testament in its World co-authored with N.T. Wright, he enjoys tennis, and hating coffee. He is married to Naomi and together they have four children. Follow Mike on Twitter @mbird13
45 minutes | May 12, 2021
69: The Big One About Consent
Consent is a big word that's been in the news for the past few years, and when New South Wales Police Commissioner Mick Fuller suggested an app to regulate consent for the purpose of reducing assaults, we knew it was time for THE TALK. What is informed, enthusiastic consent? Why is it crucial for evangelicals to engage with this topic even with abstinence teaching? What does agency look like for women in relationships? This is the big talk about consent. Full show notes here Got thoughts? Email it to us: email@example.com Talk back to us on Instagram and Twitter Partner with us for $3/month to hear uncut interviews, romcom debriefs and a to get a ticket to The Green Room, a live chat with Jess & Devi.
62 minutes | May 3, 2021
68: Why You Need To Watch 'Promising Young Woman'
Want a movie that simultaneously makes you think about revenge and forgiveness, sex and consent, men and women AND romcoms? "Promising Young Woman" is director/writer Emerald Fennel's Oscar-winning movie, and you guys. We have BIG THOUGHTS about what it has to say to us today. Jess & Devi talk through the major plot points, tracking Cassie's choices in light of purity culture and the what the broader culture around us says about men, women, sex and consent. (Warning: episode contains tons of spoilers) Our thanks to Viviana Ortiz who created the episode artwork and allowed us to use it. Follow her: @vivs_studio Bonus - go to the show notes for a free movie discussion guide Partner with us for $3/month to receive bonus episodes and a ticket to the Green Room (a monthly zoom chat with us and other partners) Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter
37 minutes | Apr 28, 2021
67: Where Did Jenna Go From Here?
It's time to hear one of YOUR stories. Today Jenna tells us about purity culture in California, how her teen years and 20s helped her make decisions as she got older. Her story will help you feel less alone. You can hear our thoughts about Pretty Woman on The Jess & Devi Show for $3/month. Sign up today! Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter.
47 minutes | Apr 21, 2021
66: Relationships & Attachment Triggers with Krispin Mayfield
This week we start to find ways to heal, grow, and move forward. Therapist Krispin Mayfield gives us simple tools to begin the process of healing. Full show notes here Partner with us for $3/month to hear uncut episodes with experts AND our recaps of romcoms from the 80s, 90s and 00s like this week's look back at Pretty Woman. Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter. Krispin Mayfield a therapist trained in Emotionally Focused Therapy, working with individuals and couples in Portland, OR. He explores the intersection of spirituality and attachment science on his podcast Attached to the Invisible and has a forthcoming book from Zondervan in 2022. Connect with Krispin on Instagram and Twitter.
56 minutes | Apr 13, 2021
65: Is Your Love Preoccupied, Avoidant, or Disorganized?
The science of attachment teaches us about how we relate to other people. As therapist Krispin Mayfield tells us today, we were created for connection, so how are we connecting with others if we were never taught how to do so in healthy ways? In part one today we cover the foundations of attachment: How we learn to attach, the coping strategies we use, what that might look like in our relationships. Full show notes here Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter. Become a partner today for $3 and get uncut interviews with guests, romcom debriefs, and starting in May, a ticket to The Green Room, a live zoom chat with Jess and Devi and other partners. Krispin Mayfield a therapist trained in Emotionally Focused Therapy, working with individuals and couples in Portland, OR. He explores the intersection of spirituality and attachment science on his podcast Attached to the Invisible and has a forthcoming book from Zondervan in 2022. Connect with Krispin on Instagram and Twitter.
50 minutes | Apr 7, 2021
64: 'Biblical' Womanhood Was Always Cultural Womanhood With Professor Beth Allison Barr
Remember those talks about how to be a "Biblical" woman, or a Proverbs 31 woman? What if it was never about the Bible? Professor Beth Allison Barr talks us through the cultural forces that shaped how the church treated women from the medieval period to the Reformation to where we are today. Full show notes here Our partners get to hear Dr. Barr explain how women have been written out of the English Bible, and you can too by joining today for $3/month. Join the conversation on Instagram and Twitter. Beth Allison Barr (PhD, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill) is professor of history and associate dean of the Graduate School at Baylor University in Waco, Texas, where she specializes in medieval history, women’s history, and church history. She is the president of the Conference on Faith and History and is a member of Christians for Biblical Equality. Barr has written for Christianity Today, the Washington Post, and Religion News Service, and is a regular contributor to The Anxious Bench, the popular Patheos website on Christian history. Connect with Dr. Barr on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.
52 minutes | Apr 1, 2021
63: What To Do When #MeToo Is In The News?
Trigger Warning: rape and sexual assault What do you do when the news is triggering? Australia's been reeling with its own #MeToo moment, and as headline after headline broadcasted the names of abusers and politicians, we wanted to centre you, the survivors. Psychologist Naomi Palmer joins us to give us tips for those of you processing triggers as well as how to support the ones you love who are dealing with the news in a more personal way. This episode also starts off with a discussion about app dating, and how to gain confidence in dating after purity culture (Jess has five practical tips). Show notes here Join the fun on The Jess & Devi Show for $3/month. You get uncut interviews and our lookbacks at romcoms of the past (this week we have a new one - Sweet Home Alabama - is it sweet or sour after all this time?). Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter
38 minutes | Mar 24, 2021
Where Did Julia Go From Here?
The last episode of the month is when we get to hear YOUR stories, and today Julia talks to us about untangling purity culture and deconstructing her faith...in 2008. She was way ahead of schedule, and she's got stories and insights to share with us about how she went about doing it. Listen to hear more about parenting, managing anxiety, questioning your faith, and rebuilding. Full show notes here Become a partner for $3/month and hear our recap of Sweet Home Alabama on the Jess & Devi Show! Talk to us on Twitter and Instagram
48 minutes | Mar 17, 2021
61: What Does the Bible Really Say
We hear a lot about what the New Testament supposedly says about.. everything (including sex). But as we're reminded today by our guest, the New Testament is largely made up of letters that we're "eavesdropping" on. So if we want to know what these letters might mean for us, we'll need to get to know who wrote the letter and to whom. New Testament Christians. What was their cultural context? What ideas formed the people around them and how did this uniquely shape the way the gospel was communicated? This episode is packed with insights from Professor Mariam Kamell Kovalishyn from Regent College, and the full conversation is available only for our partners for $3/month. Full Show Notes Here Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter Mariam J. Kovalishyn joined the faculty at Regent College in 2010, and was appointed Assistant Professor of New Testament in 2013. The majority of Mariam’s research has centered on the epistle of James, Jewish literature of the Intertestamental period, and classical Graeco-Roman literature. Additionally, since coming to Regent, she has expanded to researching and writing across the epistles, Pauline and General. Mariam has co-authored a commentary on James (Zondervan), has published a number of articles in books and journals. She is currently working on another commentary on James for the Story of God series, and a biblical theology of social justice for Zondervan, as well as a commentary on 1 and 2 Peter.
51 minutes | Mar 10, 2021
60: First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage, Then What?
Jess got married, and we are talking about it! What if "Congratulations" is the wrong thing to say at a wedding? How can we see marriage as a different stage of life instead of a promotion from singleness? We also talk about Meghan Markle and Prince Harry's interview with Oprah Winfrey, a couple talking about their first few years as newlyweds. What does this tell us about marriage? And we finish it off with your marriage advice - the good, the bad, and the... well.. listen to hear it all. Full show notes Partner with us for $3/month to get uncut interviews and hear a monthly debrief of romcoms from the past. Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter
49 minutes | Mar 3, 2021
59: Does The Movie 'Never Been Kissed' Hold Up?
This episode is part of our Jess & Devi Show series for our partners, but today you get a peak at the magic on the inside with our recap of the 1999 hit rom com "Never Been Kissed." Josie Grosie. Teacher Sam Coulson. Horrible prom memories (remember Billy??) and drugged brownies. Let's walk back through memory lane to see if the movie that gave some of us chills is any good in 2021. Show notes here All our partners get two exclusive episodes a month for $3, one movie recap and one uncut interview with our expert guests. Join us today! Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter
39 minutes | Feb 24, 2021
58: Where Did Amy Go From Here?
What's the best way to push back against celebrity culture? Listen to people who aren't on the platform. We do that once a month by featuring YOUR stories. Today we hear from Amy, one of our earliest listeners and partners. She's a public school English teacher, and we talk about purity culture in Australia, finding her voice, how she navigated app dating, and where she's going from here. Full show notes here If you want to join the Ladies Night Book Club, it's your last chance. Come read Redeeming Sex by Debra Hirsch with us in March and April for $9/month. Join us for weekly zoom calls, Facebook discussions, a Q&A with Debra Hirsch, and an exclusive conversation with her as well. Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter
51 minutes | Feb 17, 2021
57: An Expansive Vision for Human Sexuality with Debra Hirsch
Debra Hirsch published the book Redeeming Sex in 2015 before evangelicals had the language we do today for the connection between spirituality and sexuality. Her work flows out of her decades of lived experience as a counselor and pastor working with people in the area of sexuality. She has a lifetime of wisdom and insight to share with us, and we get a piece of that in this conversation. We are more than our genital "bits and bobs" as Deb says, we are wired to know and be known, love and be loved, we are wired for connection and intimacy, for a sexuality that is social, not just genital. Full show notes here Want more of the story Deb is telling here? Join us for the Ladies Night Book Club for $9/month as we read Redeeming Sex in March and April. Join the conversation on Instagram and Twitter Deb Hirsch is a speaker, church leader, and writer who has led churches in both Australia and Los Angeles. She is one of the founders of Forge Mission Training Network and is a member of the Forge America national team. She also serves as a board member for Missio Alliance and was part of the leadership team of Christian Associates, a church planting movement in Europe, North & South America. Her book Redeeming Sex reflects her own journey and attempts to bring new conversations about sexuality into the context of the church. Deb has been involved in social work, community development and as a trained counselor has worked in the field of sexuality for over twenty-five years.
22 minutes | Feb 15, 2021
BONUS: An Update on Ravi Zacharias
We discuss the report released last week by Miller & Martin PLLC about numerous allegations of sexual abuse and misconduct by Ravi Zacharias. Full show notes here Join the Ladies Night Book Club for $9/month for March 1 start - we are discussing Redeeming Sex by Deb Hirsch
44 minutes | Feb 10, 2021
56: What Breaks Us And Why Sharing Helps With Laura Tremaine
Laura Tremaine is a storyteller and she joins us for a candid conversation about her life in a white evangelical subculture, how she moved out of it in Hollywood, and how she navigated her relationships and sexuality. Laura's superpower is sharing her stuff and encouraging us to do the same. She models that for us today by telling us the stories at pivotal points of her faith, relationships, and sexuality. We talk about: how her parents trust empowered her what sex revealed to her about what she believed about God why sharing our stuff matters You also get to hear from a member of our Ladies Night Book Club, Morgan, who shares why she joined and why you should too. Join the Ladies Night Book Club for $9/month. We start Redeeming Sex by Deb Hirsch on March 1, and if you're part of our book club, you get weekly zoom calls to discuss what you're learning in a safe group of spiritually curious women. You also get an exclusive podcast interview with Deb Hirsch and get to ask her your questions in a zoom Q&A. Join today! Show notes here Laura Tremaine is a writer and podcaster. On her weekly podcast 10 Things to Tell You, she encourages listeners to take the episode prompts to a friend or to their journal, because meaningful connections come from good conversations. Her first book Share Your Stuff. I'll Go First. released in February 2021. Laura lives in Los Angeles with her husband, Jeff, and their two children. You can connect with Laura on Instagram @laura.tremaine.
37 minutes | Feb 4, 2021
55: Galentines and the Celebration of Friendship in a Romance World
February the month of love! Why is it though that both the broader culture and church culture tries to funnel us toward romantic love as the only expression of love there is? We want to celebrate Galentines today (and may we suggest, Guy-entines?!), and celebrate the reasons why our friendships are worth the investment. We explore why it might be tricky in our highly online, disconnected world, and we examine how to maintain friendships while dating or after marriage. We also open up the mailbag and have another segment with Dr. Celeste Holbrook answering a sex question at the end. Full show notes here Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter Been thinking about joining us for book club? Ladies Night Book Club starts a new book on March 1. Sign up here for $9/month. Or become a partner for $3/month and get two extra podcasts a month - an uncut interview and a deep dive into movies from the 80s and 90s.
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