41 minutes | Jun 25, 2020
Series finalé - freestyle conversation
This week we decided to finish the series with a freestyle episode - no topic planned, just talking and seeing where it goes. We cover anger, fear, identity, attachment, emotions, letting go, spirituality vs religion, parenting, and more… With all that we reckon there’ll be something for everyone! We’re going to take a break for the summer but first, we have 3 open calls coming up - 2nd, 9th and 16th July 2020 - subscribe to the newsletter below to be guaranteed to hear about those. So listen in to this weeks’ episode, see what occurs to you, and get in touch with any questions or to discuss this topic for yourself. Just go to the website www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com If you enjoy this and know others who you think might benefit please share with them so they can hear it too. With love, Natalie, Gary and Helen Here are the resources we mentioned in the show Sadhguru https://www.youtube.com/user/sadhguru Deepak Chopra’s Daily Breath - episodes about the different domains of reality - physical, quantum and virtual https://www.deepakchopra.com/podcast/article/63 Jill Bolte-Taylor and her experience of her left brain going off-line due to a stroke https://www.ted.com/talks/jill_bolte_taylor_my_stroke_of_insight/transcript?language=en Mooji https://www.youtube.com/user/Moojiji Illustrating Rain’s Podcast on creativity https://www.illustratingrain.com/podcast Love is letting go of fear Coaches mentioned: Piers Thurston https://qualityofmind.biz Clare Dimond https://claredimond.com Dave Kibby https://davekibby.org Our own individual sites: Gary Bridgeman https://garybridgeman.me Helen Amery http://wildfigsolutions.co.uk Natalie Nuttall https://www.natalienuttall.co.uk Ways to stay connected Subscribe to the newsletter to be kept updated https://www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com/ Join the private Facebook group to get into discussion on the topics https://www.facebook.com/groups/1136692516681005/ Subscribe on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3eWJRNXHNwK9gjdCudcOAw
46 minutes | Jun 19, 2020
Procrastination - why can’t I just get on with it?
As often happens in these conversations, we quickly identify that procrastination isn’t a true ‘thing’ that can be defined or identified. It’s a mind-made label given to an activity that the self-narrative ‘thinks’ should happen in THIS time frame and which is happening in a different time frame. The tension arises when ‘we’ do battle with life, believing it should go our way and not life’s way. And yet, as we continue to explore - when we come to see more and more that we are not the do-er, not the decider, not the controller - we see that everything is happening in the only way it can. Think of times you’ve not done something ‘to plan’ and yet it’s worked out perfectly. Or when delaying saved you a whole load of unnecessary activity. Or even when delay meant something went ‘wrong’ and yet later turned out to have been the best result. When we attach to ideas, we are lost in imagination, and we suffer - the perfect mechanism to wake us back up! Listen in, see what occurs to you, and get in touch with any questions or to discuss this topic for yourself. Just go to the website www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com If you enjoy this and know others who you think might benefit please share with them so they can hear it too. With love, Natalie, Gary and Helen Here are the resources we mentioned in the show Elizabeth Gilbert’s book on creativity - https://www.elizabethgilbert.com/books/big-magic/ Russell Brand interviewing Elizabeth Gilbert - https://luminary.link/2uX8oaI2p7 Gary Weber where he talks about the brain activity seen in decision making and how the self-narrative that claims the decision has nothing to do with deciding - the “I” that we think we are plays no part - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QeNmydIk8Yo Charles Eisenstien living in the gift programme - https://charleseisenstein.org/courses/living-in-the-gift/ Ways to stay connected Subscribe to the newsletter to be kept updated https://www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com/ Join the private Facebook group to get into the discussion on the topics https://www.facebook.com/groups/1136692516681005/ Subscribe on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3eWJRNXHNwK9gjdCudcOAw
45 minutes | Jun 12, 2020
Making sense of trauma in the world
In the aftermath of George Floyd’s death, the world is confused and reeling with the horror of what was seen on our screens, protests have happened and the conversation about race and discrimination has re-surfaced. In this episode, we intend to bring the conversation to a deeper level, to the love and connection that we are, and from which we act with greater humanity, from wholeness, and therefore in the direction of real inclusion - not just removing the symptoms of racism from a fundamentally racist system. We explore up and down the scale from the relative experience of our physical system, which carries ancestral trauma in its DNA, through psychology, and into the realms prior to thought which is untouched by any experience of form. In spanning these realms we hope to raise something into your own experience, maybe helping something to be seen afresh, maybe loosening a previously fixed belief, maybe allowing a denied emotion to be felt. Whatever it is for you, trust that that’s all that can happen and that you will be guided to the next step that’s perfect for you. Listen in, see what occurs to you, and get in touch with any questions or to discuss this topic for yourself. If you enjoy this and know others who you think might benefit please share with them so they can hear it too. With love, Natalie, Gary and Helen Here are the resources we mentioned in the show and some extras that we thought could be useful. This document provides resources structured to lead you through the process of growth to become an effective ally and eventually accomplices for anti-racist work if that is your path. Byron Katie - The Work - a practical process to dissolve the fixed beliefs that keep us stuck in repeating cycles of behaviour, and which reconnects us to who we are before thought https://thework.com Russell Brand interviewing Kindhe Andrews about systemic racism from both a physical-world economic perspective as well as touching on the work to be done at the spiritual, self-level https://t.co/GYT2s0XqTY John Amaral who teaches energetic chakra reintegration and balance https://johnamaral.com Rupert Spira guiding a delegate on one of his retreats to recognise the space prior to concepts of black or woman. Not in denial of the concepts, but in recognition that they are not who we are, and from where we can then live with aligned freedom and love every concept that appears for what it is https://youtu.be/fRSHHQPceGU Subscribe to the newsletter to be kept updated https://www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com/ Join the private Facebook group to get into the discussion on the topics https://www.facebook.com/groups/1136692516681005/
36 minutes | Jun 4, 2020
I need your validation - what happens when we people please?
Give us a yes if you’re a people pleaser!! Ha - classic people pleaser joke!! (Just made it up btw!) Join us for this episode to explore all the way from the tangle of rules created in childhood through to the experiences of people-pleasing as adults, how we get lost and suffer when believe our wellbeing, our good enoughness and our sense of value in this world relies on pleasing others. We look at marriage, parenting, work and we see how the in-the-moment yes’s lead to longer-term pain and suffering. And we look at how it couldn’t happen any other way. We see how life will always keep us on track and show us where we’re lost in a story of pleasing others, plus we invite you to go beyond any ideas of pleasing and not pleasing to drop into the abiding truth before all of that, where there is clarity, wellbeing and connection to this moment now. Listen in, see what occurs to you, and get in touch with any questions or to discuss this topic for yourself. Just go to the website www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com If you enjoy this and know others who you think might benefit please share with them so they can hear it too. With love, Natalie, Gary and Helen Subscribe to the newsletter to be kept updated https://www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com/ Join the private Facebook group to get into the discussion on the topics https://www.facebook.com/groups/1136692516681005/Subscribe on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3eWJRNXHNwK9gjdCudcOAw
41 minutes | May 28, 2020
Why aren’t you listening to me? - how we get lost in the illusion of relationship to another
We’ve all been there. It feels like we need to shout to be heard like we’ve been known to do with someone who speaks a different language; as though volume will help them understand us better. Does it help? No. Does it create friction and frustration? Yes. So what instead? In this episode, we explore what’s really going on in relationships, how there is no objective other - the person we’re in a relationship with only appears to us through the prism of our thinking. Given our thinking changes moment to moment, so too does our experience of another. But we don’t always notice that. If we’re clinging tightly to a story of who we think they are - and who we think we are - then we don’t allow any information in that might send that story off-track. Even if we suffer in the story. In this episode, we look at this experience of ‘others not listening to me’ from a few different angles and we invite you to listen in with curiosity, with a readiness to hear something new, because it’s in those moments that our whole world can change. Thinking changes - experience changes - and there’s nothing else going on. Listen in, see what occurs to you, and get in touch with any questions or to discuss this topic for yourself. Just go to the website www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com If you enjoy this and know others who you think might benefit please share with them so they can hear it too. With love, Natalie, Gary and Helen Ziva Meditation video about slate, sand and water as a metaphor for returning to our in-the-moment responsive, sensitivity https://bit.ly/3en2JxW Subscribe to the newsletter to be kept updated https://www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com/ Join the private Facebook group to get in on the discussion on the topics https://www.facebook.com/groups/1136692516681005/ Subscribe on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3eWJRNXHNwK9gjdCudcOAw
38 minutes | May 21, 2020
Loneliness and disconnection - what happens when we feel separate?
Lonely in isolation because of coronavirus? Talk of a loneliness epidemic? What’s true about an experience of loneliness, and what’s illusory and transient? The mind will attach to an idea of loneliness, turn it into an imagined constant, and start on a quest trying to solve the suffering through other people or work or the pub. But most of those ‘solutions’ have disappeared in the current situation, so now what? This is in fact an amazing time to see what loneliness really is - a temporary idea of me as a separate individual, momentarily experiencing fearful thinking. The thinking passes and the idea of loneliness passes with it. The more we see this is how it works, that who we really are is the constant conscious awareness of all of it, the easier it gets, and the more we find we’re naturally moved to connect with people or not without a desperate imagined need behind it. Now knowing that none of it says anything about who we are or the state of our wellbeing. Listen in, notice what occurs to you, and get in touch with any questions or if you want to discuss this topic for yourself. Just go to the website www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com If you enjoy this and know others who you think might benefit please share with them so they can hear it too. With love, Helen, Natalie, Gary Loneliness vs being alone https://www.storypick.com/lonely-vs-alone/?fbclid=IwAR3iHNWOKMNaXAn6AwRBInGn_95GMOgi0EG-Jr3tLbKtj3NPE-5sBRYjJHM Subscribe to the newsletter to be kept updated https://www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com/ Join the private Facebook group to get into the discussion on the topics https://www.facebook.com/groups/1136692516681005/Subscribe on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3eWJRNXHNwK9gjdCudcOAw
38 minutes | May 14, 2020
Comparison the route to suffering
Whether we’re comparing ‘up’ to others who look like they’ve got it sorted, ‘down’ to others who don’t and feeling guilty that we have it better, or comparing ‘nowhere’ into an imagined future self or job or situation - the moment we identify with any of that, we’re lost. Whereas before the uncomfortable feelings that come with identified-comparison would have been taken as a signal to fix this life, or income level, or social status, or health, what we invite you to here is to take those feelings as a signal that you’re believing something to be true that can’t be true. It’s an invitation to look behind the curtain and see the constant behind the fluctuating experiences and see the reliable mechanism - when we’re caught in me-based thought and believing it, it’s going to feel yukky. Listen in, notice what occurs to you, and get in touch if you want to talk about anything we discuss or to ask any questions. Just go to the website www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com If you enjoy this and know others who you think might benefit please share on so they can hear it too. With love, Helen, Natalie, Gary
41 minutes | May 7, 2020
Job insecurity - what does being made redundant say about your wellbeing?
At these times of change, businesses are going out of business, people are losing jobs or waiting at home wondering if they’ll have a job or company to go back to. It can look scary and impossible and inevitably feelings of insecurity will appear within all that. What we invite here in this conversation is the possibility to see more than we have been trained to first jump to. Given that we’ve been taught that feeling fearful, upset or insecure is wrong, and given we’ve been taught that we need to have financial security (whatever that nebulous phrase means), it’s inevitable that we’ll feel lost, confused and busy-minded in an experience of possible job loss. It’s also inevitable that - from what we’ve been taught - we’ll try and fix and solve the job or the money situation as the first place to start feeling better. And - the more we see that the feelings of insecurity are appearing in conjunction with ideas of me and my imagined terrible future, independent of what’s actually happening in life in that moment, then we can start to create chinks of light in what otherwise looks terrible, because we can start to see that, when those thoughts aren’t there, we’re fine and just going about life with ease. Listen in to hear us talk about these ideas, as well as how us humans navigate experiences like this, how we are designed and able to do this - with fear, or without or both. How the more we stay with and allow in all experience, the easier we find we move through it and live more fully. Doing what looks obvious to do moment to moment, using whatever resources occur to us to use along the way. So sit back, relax and listen in to see what opens up for you. If you have any questions or concerns about what we’ve discussed in this episode or to tell us any topics you’d like us to cover in the future, just get in touch on the website www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com And thank you for listening. We really appreciate it. If there are others who you think would enjoy this too then please share with them. With love, Gary, Helen and Natalie
37 minutes | Apr 30, 2020
Positivity: can we really think our way to happiness?
It really looks like we can, doesn’t it? We’ve been told for so long to get the right mindset in order to be happy and successful and it’s really looked like the ‘right’ mindset is a happy one. What we point to in this episode is that, for all these years, we’ve been trying to reverse-engineer a natural process, a natural capacity within each of us. The mind has grabbed hold of an experience it likes the look of, it’s attempted to fix it in place as ‘wanted’ and deny the ‘unwanted’ and then it’s set about gathering strategies and tactics to ‘do’ positivity. All in pursuit of that nice feeling it remembers - and which deep down we know is available, we’ve just been told to look in the wrong place. The more we look and inquire and prod and poke these beliefs we’ve been handed, the more the story falls apart and - counter to what the mind would tell us - the more we rediscover what was already here. So sit back, relax and listen as we do just that with the ideas of positivity, happiness and hope. If you have any questions or concerns about this episode or any topics you’d like us to cover in the future, just get in touch on the website www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com And thank you for listening. We really appreciate it. If there are others who you think would enjoy this too then please share with them. With love, Natalie, Gary and Helen
41 minutes | Apr 23, 2020
Welcome back to Series two! We’ve kicked off this season - of course - with the topic of the moment - coronavirus and isolation, as we share our various experiences of the last 4 or 5 weeks. We begin with our experiences of the early weeks where we all had experiences of turmoil, confusion, frustration and grumpiness. Being dropped in at the deep end of a whole new experience of life that was confronting our various tightly-held beliefs was inevitably gonna feel like that. For Helen, it was a belief of “I can’t homeschool my kids” - in the presence of that homeschooling was bound to look impossible! For Gary, it was “I’m an introvert, I need my own space” - in the presence of that, inevitable grumpiness with these people who are apparently in MY space. And for Natalie - the big one - an experience of Coronavirus accompanied with “I’m not OK if I’m ill” was perfectly designed to bring extreme symptoms, extreme experiences and the opportunity to explore what was really true about those, what is this experience really? We also talk about what would be seen as the “good” things from this situation like more community, greater connection, more humanity and of course the benefit to the environment. If you’ve been finding yourself in the rollercoaster of the ups and downs since we all retreated to our homes, have a listen and see what occurs to you about your experience. Is it really coming from those people you share a house with, or is there something else going on? Thanks for listening and please share if you like it so others can find us too.
38 minutes | Apr 2, 2020
Reality and what the feck is it?
To close off this season we’re going straight to the heart of the matter, exploring and questioning this thing we’ve taken as a fixed, objective reality all our lives. That is, until something starts to draw us towards a different conversation. One which puts chinks in the armour of what’s really going on. We discuss reality through the lenses of spirituality as well as science, exploring about consciousness - what is it? How does it happen? Are there levels of consciousness? The moving in and out of experiences of being limited to this body to being the expansive nothingness. In sharing our personal experiences we hope to give an insight into the non-linear nature of this conversation and how to begin in this exploration, as well as how your experience of life can shift when you start to get curious about this thing we call life. We’d love to hear from you with your questions and thoughts so just get in touch here [link]. For now, settle down, relax and join us for the chat. Mentions in the show: Daily Breath Podcast from Deepak Chopra - Helen mentioned the episodes on 4th and 5th March 2020, and the 2nd and 3rd March might be useful precursors to that. They’re all short (max 7 mins) episodes - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/daily-breath-with-deepak-chopra/id1458887650 On The Mystery of Being - the book Helen mentioned which brings science and spirituality together - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Mystery-Being-Contemporary-Convergence-Spirituality/dp/1684033950/ref=sr_1_1?hvadid=80470539078867&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvqmt=e&keywords=the+mystery+of+being&qid=1583418927&sr=8-1 Donald Hoffman talking about his research that has shown we don’t see reality as it is - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYp5XuGYqqY&t=368s A discussion between Donald Hoffman and Deepak Chopra about Hoffman’s evolutionary research as well as getting into his new research into consciousness being fundamental - https://www.awaketvnetwork.live/videos/jennifer-hill-a-conversation-for-consciousness-with-deepak-chopra-don-hoffman Anil Seth talking about his research that shows how we live in a controlled hallucination, the brain constructs our reality moment to moment - https://www.ted.com/talks/anil_seth_how_your_brain_hallucinates_your_conscious_reality Other resources for your curiosity: Our own sites - Gary - https://activate-yourlife.com/ Helen - http://wildfigsolutions.co.uk/ - Helen has a weekly newsletter you can sign up to in which she shares a short insight, links to longer content, and updates about programmes that are coming up. Natalie - https://www.natalienuttall.co.uk/ - you can engage with Natalie via her facebook page (Natalie Nuttall Innate Wellbeing), where she shares daily content, videos, quotes and realisations Three Principles Michael Neill’s Inside Out Revolution - https://www.amazon.co.uk/s?k=the+inside-out+revolution&hvadid=80333100153073&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvqmt=e&tag=mh0a9-21&ref=pd_sl_2lvdge9024_e For a more business-y book, Ken Manning, Sandy Krott and Rob Charbitt wrote this - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Invisible-Power-Insight-Principles-Work/dp/0996530509/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=insight+principles&qid=1583419089&sr=8-1 For anxiety, stress and depression, check out Nicola Bird - https://alittlepeaceofmind.co.uk/ For habits and change, Amy Johnson - https://dramyjohnson.com/ Relationships and details of the Soul Centred Series - https://rohiniross.com/ Jacquie Forde, Unashamedly Human: https://jacquieforde.com/ Non Duality Rupert Spira is a well respected teacher in the field of non-duality. You can sign up to receive a daily quote and he runs occasional free webinars as well as paid for events and retreats - https://non-duality.rupertspira.com/home Adyashanti is an American spiritual teacher who maintains “Spirituality is not something set apart from life, rather, it is a plunge into the heart of existence -.https://www.adyashanti.org/Clare Dimond runs monthly online group programmes, as well as having written books - https://claredimond.com/ Mooji is a spiritual teacher whose wisdom and guidance points beyond the limitations of personal identity to true nature: https://mooji.org/mooji
39 minutes | Mar 26, 2020
The search for enlightenment and how to call it off
Enlightenment - What is it? How do you know you’re enlightened? How do you get there? And when do you stop? We explore all these questions and more in this episode, connecting into our own experiences and how we see it, as well as what we’ve heard from others say in this arena. We ultimately see that calling off the search is a natural conclusion of searching - but how do we get to that point? Have a listen and see what resonates for you. So settle down, relax and join us for the chat. We’d love to hear from you with your questions and thoughts so just get in touch here. Mentions in the show: Russell Brand interviewing Michael Singer (you can currently sign up to Luminary for free via Russell’s website) - https://luminary.link/Hp6oOOrcq4 Rupert Spira on awakening and enlightenment - https://youtu.be/3X_An-BTGqcSpiritual Enlightenment, the damnedest thing - Jed McKenna - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Spiritual-Enlightenment-Damnedest-Thing-Trilogy/dp/0980184843
46 minutes | Mar 19, 2020
You don’t need anyone to complete you - despite what song lyrics are telling you
It’s everywhere - in songs, in movies, on Facebook - this perfect relationship that we’re meant to have that will somehow make our life secure, complete and happy ever after. When we believe all these concepts to be truths we get lost and we suffer because they are mind-made, man-made ideas which could never have the power to make us feel anything - including our partner. We only ever experience them as a function of our own thought, our partner is an idea the same as any other concept. The more we see this, the more our thinking settles down because it stops trying to wrestle with itself, and from that settled state of mind, we then experience the true love, freedom and security that we really are. So settle down, relax and join us for the chat. We’d love to hear from you with your questions and thoughts so just get in touch here. Mentions in the show: George Pransky’s The Relationship Handbook https://www.amazon.co.uk/Relationship-Handbook-Satisfying-Relationships-Anniversary/dp/0998874205/ref=dp_ob_title_bk Angus and Rohini Ross https://rohiniross.com/
41 minutes | Mar 12, 2020
If money doesn't buy happiness, why are we still chasing it?
This week we’re talking about money. It’s an aspect of life that our identity can become very tangled in because of the consistent and seemingly true messages that how much money we have says something about our worth in the world, that it’s a way to bring security or that it’s a way to avoid danger. This entanglement we find ourselves in leads to some behaviours which, when repeated over and over, start to lead to suffering. This suffering is the perfect way for us to start to wake up to what money actually is and who we really are. The kind of suffering you, or others you know, might be experiencing include shopping addictions, inability to ask for the payment or pay increases you’re entitled to, endless chasing of the next, bigger, better thing, not going for jobs you’re capable of because you’re apparently not worth that much, or hoarding and protecting the money you have. It’s a big topic and we explore a number of angles. Have a listen and see what you hear. If you have immediate problems with money that need practical support, please get in touch with experts who can help. https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/loans/debt-help-plan/ https://www.stepchange.org https://www.businessdebtline.org https://www.gamblersanonymous.org.uk/ Now settle down, relax and join us for the chat. We’d love to hear from you with your questions and thoughts so just get in touch here. Mentions in the show: Michael Neill’s Financial Freedom from the Inside Out (self study programme) https://www.michaelneill.org/store/financial-freedom/ It's Not Your Money: How to Live Fully from Divine Abundance - https://www.amazon.com/Its-Not-Your-Money-Abundance-ebook/dp/B07CWFGMJJ Russell Brand’s episode 74 with Wendy Mandy, Shaman - https://www.russellbrand.com/podcasts/page/2/
32 minutes | Mar 5, 2020
Communities - how much do we need the, how much do they limit us
This week we explore the fascinating topic of communities - which initially sparked an interesting reaction from Natalie who had some strong attachment to it in the context of her peer support charity work (the spirit of community is often cited as a positive term). This was a really interesting chat which ultimately showed that the sense of belonging we often innocently seek in communities is always within. And we came to the realisation that community (like everything else) is a neutral term upon which we have overlaid lots of meaning. Settle down, relax and join us for a chat. We’d love to hear from you with your questions and thoughts so just get in touch here [link]. Mentions in the show: Dr Amy Johnson’s podcast episode about nature, trees and the innate connection of those systems. How we are that - just we layer stories over the top https://dramyjohnson.com/2020/01/ep80-the-nature-of-you-how-you-and-nature-are-one-and-the-same-with-teri-whiteman-and-claudette-dietlin/?inf_contact_key=35f4e05ecb253e7cb65c597e29113fa2680f8914173f9191b1c0223e68310bb1
37 minutes | Feb 27, 2020
Parenting - you are enough
This week we talk about our different parenting journeys and experiences - each of us is at a different stage; between us our kids ranging from 5 to 18. We talk about the challenges of the early days of the first newborn, Nat and Helen sharing their experience as first-time Mums, and Gary’s experience as a Dad. We talk about the brilliance of kids, the chaos they bring, the lessons they teach us every day and we talk about how parenting has evolved for each of us since being in the understanding of the Three Principles. And, just in case you’re wondering, we also talk about how you are, definitely, enough as a parent - whatever your situation and experiences. And if that sounds crazy, take a listen and see what you think by the end. Settle down, relax and join us for a chat. We’d love to hear from you with your questions and thoughts so just get in touch here. Mentions in the show: The charity Natalie co-founded - Smile - http://www.thesmilegroup.org/family-affair-ripple-effects-perinatal-mental-illness/ Jack Pransky’s book - Parenting from the Heart https://www.amazon.co.uk/Parenting-Heart-Guide-Essence-Inside-Out/dp/1927360641
33 minutes | Feb 20, 2020
Having a purpose in life - and what if you don’t
Do you need a purpose in life? We answer this very succinctly, 1 minute into this episode, with a resounding “no”. We go on to talk about purpose vs calling, about ‘how do we know if we’re living our purpose?’ and that the more we seek a purpose the more it is disguised from us. And that we can rely on life to shout louder and louder if we’re going in a direction other than life wants us to go. We also explore ego within this topic, what role does it play, if any, as well as the opportunity for fluidity to keep living whatever it is that’s making sense for us now. We start to suffer when we are constantly chasing THE job or THE purpose for us, and we suffer when we get stuck believing that THIS one job is the only job I can do or THIS purpose is the only purpose I can fulfil. Then finally, what about organisational purpose. How these get reverse-engineered, how they can be believed to be the answer to an organisation’s performance prayers, and also how they can be a practical tool if seen for what they are. Settle down, relax and join us for a chat. We’d love to hear from you with your questions and thoughts so just get in touch here [link]. Mentions in the show: Eckhart Tolle - A New Earth Mathew Fox - A three principles coach with a great podcast exploring the heart of dad
52 minutes | Feb 13, 2020
The cult of busy - imagined badge of honour and apparent source of stress
This week we’re exploring the worlds of busy-ness, stress and self-care. How being busy isn’t ever going to get you to feel like you’ve made it, reaching that imagined pinnacle of good enough, and how avoidance of busy with self-care can become equally addictive. Both an endless chase of “I’ll be good enough when…” or “I’ll be OK when…” If goals and plans and deadlines in your life seem to be saying something about who you are and your worth in the world then we’re here to offer you a fresh perspective to step out of the normal narrative that cycles round society on these topics. Settle down, relax and join us for a chat. We’d love to hear from you with your questions and thoughts so just get in touch here. Mentions in the show: Nic Askew who videos his clients while they’re held in a loving silence https://nicaskew.com/ Ziva Meditation who Helen learnt transcendental meditation with https://zivameditation.com/
49 minutes | Feb 6, 2020
Personal development - what if there is no 'self' to 'improve'?
Welcome to episode 2 of ‘What You’ve Been Looking For.’ We talk about the self, what it is, how it’s never been there, and how, when you see that, you discover the ultimate freedom. We include pointers so you can notice times for yourself when you’ve had an experience of ‘no-self’ and how that feels. We’ve been misdirected all these years by the messaging that tells us we have to believe in ourselves, develop ourselves and that there are 3, 5 or 7 steps to do that successfully. We challenge these accepted norms and how they’re actually a source of suffering as we continue to feel like we’re never quite there, never quite good enough. Settle down, relax and join us for a chat. We’d love to hear from you with your questions and thoughts so just get in touch here. Mentions in the show: Michael Neill, a leading coach in the Three Principles - the same understanding Gary, Helen and Natalie work with clients from https://www.michaelneill.org/ Skinners pigeons https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/B._F._Skinner Acceptance and commitment therapy https://contextualscience.org/act
48 minutes | Jan 30, 2020
The Three Principles And Us
Welcome to episode 1 of ‘What you’ve been looking for.’ With this podcast, we bring you a variety of perspectives on the nature of life and experience which means we get into some deep stuff that’s at the heart of who we are as well as lighthearted humour and laughs. Settle down, relax and join us for a chat. We’re Natalie Nuttall, Gary Bridgeman and Helen Amery and we’re all coaches who reconnect clients to their innate brilliance. In this episode, we introduce who we are and how we got into the work we all do now. The label used for the work is The Three Principles and we talk about that too. What are these principles, why do they matter, what difference do they make? We’d love to hear from you with your questions and thoughts so just get in touch at www.whatyouvebeenlookingfor.com. Mentions in the show: Michael Neill, a leading coach in the Three Principles - the same understanding Gary, Helen and Natalie work with clients from https://www.michaelneill.org/ Piers Thurston, Helen’s first coach https://www.makingchangework.co.uk/