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True Connections with Weston Jolly Podcast
21 minutes | 2 months ago
Everything in Your life Is A Choice | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 66
Hi, I’m Weston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story Only if You Want the Truth The Truth is everything in your life is a choice. Everything. Everyone wants to claim the truth that they scored the winning goal or that they picked the perfect time to buy and sell in the stock market. But it seems nobody wants to step up and be accountable for a failure. There’s a reason. Only If You Want to Hear The Truth is actually about Free-Will-Choice. You have a choice for everything. And at times it can be seen as wonderfully desirous while other times can be judged as not so successful. Everything in Your Life Is A Choice is the Truth. Listen or read this. Click on the above media player or read the full transcript below. (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 066 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: Podcast 66 Only If You Want To Hear The Truth This entire podcast is only for those who want the truth. Lest you be confused on what that means, this podcast isn’t about any single perspective. Perspectives can be discussed and talked about but not today. Not now. Today is about the truth. If you’ve ever wanted to hear it plainly and simply then hold on. Buckle up if you must, because here it is. Are you ready? Here we go… Everything in your life is something that you’ve chosen. This means if; you’ve been raped, stabbed, put in jail, abused, spit upon, called the “C” word, “N” word or if you enjoy the privilege of wealth but you’ve not earned any, have one kind of skin color versus another, or if you are tall vs short, thin vs obese, smart vs unsure, talented or not …everything in your life in something that you’ve chosen… on some level. If you find yourself gasping in denial that this can’t be true -take a breath as I’m not done yet. There’s more… Free-Will-Choice is how we’ve all been empowered to choose anything. Free-will-choice is you always have a choice. In simple terms, you and I are empowered by Source and the Universe to choose anything we want too. This is given to you and I in complete unconditional love. Anything less than free-will-choice means that there would be conditions. And Source isn’t at all conditional. You know what conditions are and what they sound like; if you do this then I’ll give you that.Conditional thinking sometimes creates a lot of confusion especially in foundational categories such as love…. Maybe you’ve heard someone say, “I love you so much when you’re a good little boy or girl.” The whole concept of free will isn’t something that only get once in a while. Nope, you have free-will-choice 24–7 and for 365 days a year. It gets better. You have free-will-choice outside of this dimension. That is, you have spiritual free-will-choice too. You should really really think about that one… When people talk about the laws of the Universe; this one truth, Everything in your life is something that you’ve chosen, it’s an idea that hardly anyone actually understands. Even the most spiritual people don’t seem to really comprehend it fully. Let me explain. Academically, I was challenged to debate this statement of truth that -Everything in your life is something that you’ve chosen. I sat in a psychologist’s office and she said,“You don’t really believe that everything that happens is a result of something we create –do you?” I said, “Absolutely…Anything less would mean that we’re subject to things happening to us. As if we are puppets bouncing from thing to thing as if we aren’t creating it all.” The psychologist responded, “You’re taking about co-creation.” I responded, “Well, some people try to use this concept as a means to partially accept the truth, but ‘NO’ Everything in life is something that we’ve chosen on some level. This doesn’t mean that we are always aware of everything we’re creating. But that’s kind of the point isn’t it? Accountability? Truth and accountability go hand in hand. The more spiritually awakened you are well, the easier it is. I’m not sure my psychologist friend agreed with me, but I wasn’t looking for her agreement. I was simply sharing truth to a question that she had initiated. This is true for you too. You don’t have to agree to any truth, but I won’t lie, when we go against the grain it’s much much harder. So, let’s really power into this topic of Everything in your life is something that you’ve chosen. Am I saying that a six year old child who isn’t yet grown is choosing to be…. say… sexually abused? The short answer is “yes.” But hear me out. It’s unlikely that any child would choose to be abused on the physical level. However, it’s possible that the soul of the child has chosen it. You’re going to ask, “Why?” And it’s a good question, one that I assist people with in their spiritual awakening every day. The reason why? is to experience. We all are given the opportunity to step away from being consciously at one to be separate. This is our natural spiritual state. This perceived separation starts the moment we are conceived. Those who really want to up the ante, may choose to start with a congenital defect, or terminal illness. Babies can begin their time in their mommies womb addicted to cocaine, because their mother is an addict, which can physically look like the baby didn’t have a choice. But indeed a choice has been made. Many choices have been made. Every soul don’t have to necessarily choose a heavy or abusive experience before coming to this realm. Then this event is the result of something that wasn’t exactly spiritually planned by the soul. However, every soul knows this before coming here that there will be things that you did or did not sign up for. This is really the whole reason we come to Earth to live a life. The uncertainty of it all. I often refer to your soul having created a blueprint before incarnation. For example, when we build a house, a drawing is created detailing exactly how the house will be built on the land, what parts of the property need to be excavated, where the cement foundation will be poured, into what shape the house will be built -everything. Everything is detailed out in house blueprint BEFORE construction takes place. This is very true for every soul that incarnates. Everyone has created a spiritual blueprint before coming here. Some spiritual blueprints are very precise while others are very general in nature. When you build a house you follow a blueprint. And like all blueprints you can change your mind any time you want. In house building, you may make many changes. You may move a bathroom. Maybe you might add a sitting room off of the Master Bedroom with a balcony looking into the back yard. All of these changes can take place any time. In our analogy, you can completely build the new house perfectly according to your blue print or not. Once built the house might be flooded, burned down, slide down a mountain or be swallowed up by a sink hole. Assuming none of this happens, you may simply want to add-on to your house after it’s built to accommodate more people or desires. If you know anything about Heart’s Castle in Central California then you know that Julia Morgan, William Randolph Hearst’s architect, changed the main swimming pool no less than three times. It’s a huge pool. This is the essence of free-will-choice, you always have a choice. Esoterically, you created a spiritual blueprint before incarnating here. It’s here that you’d make a free-will-esoteric-choice to participate in the challenges, issues both positive and negative, as you might declare them now on the physical side of the fence. If you were abused, or anything undesired, it’s very likely that this was in the spiritual blueprint. There was some part of you that wanted to participate in that exchange. I know how hard that is to hear… But it’s also the gateway to your total empowerment. Really. I’ll explain more about this is a minute. It’s very likely that when you got here that you completely forget about your original spiritual blueprint. This is to be appreciated, as knowing everything that you intended to do or create could easily distract from participating in the actual experience of life. This makes for some interesting manifesting but nonetheless this is all true. If anything has ever “happened to you” then you this may help explain why. Maybe you’re still very much in the middle of issues, challenges of the strongest kind. This is where I can help. It’s an empowering moment when you realize that whatever you’ve experienced, in the past or even in this moment, that you are absolutely not limited to it. As a soul, you are much much stronger than you may even know. This fact is sometimes hard to see or even feel, especially if you’ve never allowed yourself to fully appreciate how strong you really are to have created such a challenge. This truth is enormously empowering and it’s not at all ego-based. Your ego will die when your body gives away but your spirit will never die. I’ve shared this truth of Everything in your life is something that you’ve chosen. many many times but most ly in personal sessions. I think it’s time that you opened yourself up to really awaken. Remember truth as defined by Source, just is. Let me give you the full definition of truth. Truth is. Got it now? Again, it’s not a perspective. Truth isn’t something that changes over time. It’s just truth. As simple as truth can be, accepting everything in your life as a choice is a biggie. I have to share the truth with you today, yes, right now. And frankly, there’s only one reason that you’re even here listening to this podcast – and that’s because of some level you’ve chosen to be here listening to this message right now. The more you think about it, the more it will blow your mind. It’s all amazing. Can we go down the rabbit hole a little further? It’s an interesting fact that everyone want’s to be accountable for things that they create that they consider; desired, good or amazing. And it’s a fact, that everyone want’s to deny the very same when they do something that is out of balance or even categorized as wrong or bad. The reason that I point this out in conjunction with our themed message Everything in your life is something that you’ve chosen. is because this in another reason most people want to deny those things that they think or feel are outside of their control. It kind of makes sense from a egoic point of view, but not at all from the true spiritual perspective that you are the Creator of everything around you. This kind of processing is subtle but it’s like a bear trap keeping you from you fullest potential in this very minute. Instead of thinking that you “didn’t have a choice” regarding anything that you were a participant too, allow yourself to realize that you are completely empowered with free-will-choice. And when I say that you were a participant this can be on either end of the polarity. I can think of times where I was a bully and I can certainly think of times I was bullied.What’s funny is my being bullied gets highlighted as significantly worse than my bullying another. The point is it takes at least two to play. One as the victim and the other as the antagonist. If this is done in a group dynamic, it can be four against one or it can be the whole community against one -think Joan of Arc – who was given spiritual insight from Archangel Michael. She became the moral leader for the French eventually ending a 100 year war with the English and also placing a yet to be anointed King Charles IV on the throne. My point? Joan of Arc, the Maid of Lorraine, was burnt at the stake by a pro-English Catholic bishop at 19 years of age. The antagonist might be considered the bishop who captured her, held her captive for a year and then burned her. Joan of Arc might be considered the protagonist. Of course, years later the Catholic pope Pope Callixtus (Calixtis) III declared the whole event a mistrial and even declared Joan of Arc a heroess and a martyr. If you stand back, it might seem easy to see that Joan of Arc listened to one of God’s most amazing messengers and was crucified for her following what was encouraged in her life. I’m putting emphasis on the fact that Joan of Arc had a choice. She opened herself to hear God’s word, received it, acted upon it and was killed. Additionally, the Catholic Church, the Bishop who condemned her, all did so in free-will-chioce that he individually and every person of the group that held, tried and killed the young 19 year-old French girl whom they determined a threat. I think that this example makes a rather powerful point of someone that was following their spiritual blueprint in spite of the fact that she might not live long as a result of the choices that she made. So, when I say, that you are empowered and that you are stronger than you may even realize I mean it in that you may have forgotten the bigger picture of what you’ve come here to do. I appeal to anyone that has gone through the smallest issue or the largest challenge. Of the past or in this very moment. This all becomes quite personal on so many levels which makes it special and at times -challenging. I know of many who have nearly died of drug addiction, gone to jail, sold their bodies for money, taken their lives, and abandoned the very children that they fathered or mothered. I could go one to the people I know who have been abused by their fathers, mothers, catholic priests, and teachers. I know of many who have been cut off from their families and society because of their skin color, their values or even their sexual orientation. I also know of several who were born into wealth that allows them to do nothing in terms of ever having to work for the entirety of their lives and even generations thereafter. I also know people in this same group, who willing and consciously aid the dying as Hospice volunteers not ever wanting to be compensated for their contributions that are priceless. I know others who are inventing and creating with passion to change the world. I know of some who are Olympic athletes overcoming childhood challenges that aren’t well known by others. I know the majority of you, yes you listening, that have, and continue to overcome your own personal challenges, that maybe only a few people on Earth like myself have had the privilege of knowing what you’ve been through or done, and that you still want to serve and love others like you weren’t. This makes you special. Not egoically special. Just strong and determined to choose the life that you’re living now and to make it better through your own personal empowerment. Everything comes from free will choice. I know of people that it would make logical sense that they would become the predators, like the others that were to them but instead you are the nicest most loving people you’d ever meet. I know people who give of their time, energy, money and even in some cases their lives, to be of service to another. I know of people like yourselves, who are standing up to bullies, institutions and even governments because you want to be heard as an equal -especially if you’re not the one being persecuted. In every situation, we all have free will choice. Everything in your life is something that you’ve chosen. And I earnestly and lovingly appreciate everything you’ve done or experienced because I have insight to your spiritual blueprint and all that you’re doing. So, it is I who feel compelled to share my gratitude for you who are overcoming and stepping into even more into your spiritual awareness and empowerment. WRITE A REVIEW It only takes a few minutes. Your comments and review truly assist others in becoming a part of our spiritual community. Write a Review now SOMETHING MORE Contact Us Here Telephone: (480) 212-1961 More Podcasts This Will Make You Laugh or Cry | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 65 When you’ve lost something important there can be a lot of stress in trying to remember where you put it, or perhaps of extreme value and you can’t remember the password? Listen to this it will absolutely help. My Octopus Oracle | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 64 Hi, I'mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…" My Story When does an Octopus become a spiritual Oracle?My Octopus Teacher is a documentary with an... Conscious Reflections | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 63 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryConscious Reflection"The Moment You See Higher Self You Are Enabled" - Weston JollyThere's a lot going... This Life Is Only A Dream | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 62 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryThis Life Is Only A DREAMIf it’s our physical side that creates the idea of separationin real life, do... What’s The Meaning of My Dreams? | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 61 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryWhat's The Meaning of My DREAMS?Being conscious of your dreams, and their meanings, could change and... The post Everything in Your life Is A Choice | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 66 appeared first on Weston Jolly - Spiritual Awareness. Expand Your Conscious..
15 minutes | 2 months ago
This Will Make You Laugh or Cry | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 65
Hi, I’m Weston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story This Will Make You Laugh, Cry or Drive You CRAZY When you’ve lost something important there can be a lot of stress in trying to remember where you put it, or perhaps of extreme value and you can’t remember the password? Listen to this it will absolutely help. Imagine losing your password to something that’s very important and valuable to you. It’s easy to do in our world of busyness. And assume that there is no place to retrieve your password. The piece of paper that you wrote it on is very much lost and the safe that contains your valuables can’t be broken either. Now what? You feel absolutely stressed as you really need to access these items. As you hear the second hand of clock ticking in your head, you may find think it’s either a time to laugh or a time to cry. You may not even know what you’ve lost. You know it’s important and in this case even invaluable. Listen or read this and see if the answer isn’t given to you. Click on the above media player or read the full transcript below. (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 65 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: This will make you laugh or it might even make you cry. What if you couldn’t remember your password to two hundred and fifty million dollars? Have you ever forgotten your password, of course, that you have and when you do, normally you contact the institution or the service and you just have them give you a new one right after they verify who you are. But in this case, what if they can’t do that? And what if your password is really for something super important? Let me introduce you to Stefan. Stefan is a German computer programmer living in San Francisco, California. Sometime in the past, he wrote down his password on a piece of paper to something very important and then he lost it. You may think because he’s a programmer, that he’d be more diligent about writing such housekeeping but… But in this case, he lost his password. Certainly, all passwords are important, but this one was quite valuable and well, it just got lost. What Was Lost? Stefan’s password is the key to unlocking a safe containing two hundred and fifty million dollars worth of Bitcoin. But listen to this. It gets worse, his Bitcoin vault only allows for so many tries before they permanently freeze the vault. Let me get specific here, Stefan’s Bitcoin vault only allows him ten tries total. Stefan is now down to two, which means he has already tried eight times and nothing has worked. Does this story sound at all familiar? Have you ever lost something reallly important? Can you relate to Stefan? What if you’re forgetting something that’s way more important than a quarter of a billion dollars? Maybe you’ve even forgotten the value of what’s inside you… What if I told you that I could help Stefan access his password? I think would be worth to him probably quite a bit. Right. Maybe he’d even offer me some kind of compensation. Perhaps, even a generous one? I can think of, another circumstance of someone loosing their password. In this case, a British man accidentally threw away his hard drive into a trash can, once again containing Bitcoin. This man desparate to get his hard drive back, with all of his bitcoin, is offering the local authority, the sanitation or garbage division within a city, more than 70 million dollars to allow him access to go and try and find his lost hard drive within the city’s landfill site. He is so desparate to access his money, this man has decided to reward the whole town or the whole city should he be allowed permission to dig in the town’s garbage piles. He’s offering the whole city $70 million dollars should he find it! What extreme will you go to find something you’ve lost? Perhaps, you’re not even aware that anything’s been lost. Or maybe, you’re thinking that you have nothing of real value? Maybe, you’ve forgotten the wealth or even the understanding and the knowledge that you have inside of you? Maybe you’ve forgotten your spiritual gifts. What’s the key to finding your spiritual gifts? Can’t remember the password? Maybe you feel pressure or frustration? And don’t you feel that there’s so, so much more within you? This means being totally aware and expressing yourself consistently, especially using your spiritual gifts. What if I could help Stefan in the same way that I could help you access this infinite connection to your past, future and all knowledge, including energy, creativity, and again, especially using your creativity, will I can you see your soul has access to everything? That’s so important that it’s worth repeating your soul has access to everything. We know this logically, because when you die, all of this knowledge and understanding is instantly returned to you. So where is your soul locked up? Where’s the password? Where did you write it down? How come you can’t remember if you’re facing a crisis? Think of Stefan. Maybe he really could use that money now. What if he can’t wait? Stefan has actually said that, he’s been lying in bed worrying about that, having gone through eight try, with only two more ties. It’s obvious, he’s trying to come up with a new tactic. And when he does, he goes to the logic side of himself. Yet, it’s not working. And then he has all of this increased frustration that his mind can’t remember, it doesn’t give him the answer. Well, that’s indeed a problem. (This approach.) You may also feel the same kind of worry, fear or resentment that you can’t remember something super important – and you could even be angry. How can you access your soul? What’s the key? It’s easy.. Well, before I give you the answer just yet, let me tell you where the key isn’t. The password to your soul isn’t in your mind. You see, Stefan is conditioned through his logic, through his mind and through his intelligence to use his mind through logic. But do you know what? It’s not working. He is desperate and he’s putting all of his hope in that he’ll remember his password somehow. Stefan has placed all of this his hope that technology of the future will be able to crack the system to access his bitcoin. So he’s putting all of his emphasis in the intellect of his mind. And like Stefan, if you’ve been relying upon your mind to try and access something that doesn’t really have a lock on it. What did I say? What do you mean? It doesn’t have a lock on him. You see, accessing your Higher Self is accessing your soul. And there’s no password to that. You can open up that part of you, anytime that you want. Within your mind, there’s an ego. And of course, the vault containing your Higher Self, allowing you to access your soul isn’t hidden at all. That’s what I just got through saying. So what I’m saying is there’s no hidden vault and there’s no password. Well, you might debate that because. But it’s actually true. Your Higher Self isn’t a secret either. Don’t forget that accessing your soul provides you every opportunity, just like being in the ocean to catch every wave, as it were. Perhaps you can’t properly imagine that if you open this gateway, this path, this channel, you really do have access to everything. Finally, you have understanding as to your purpose how you want to live and express yourself, how to create the lifestyle in all of the desires that you want and to experience life to its fullest and most importantly, how you want to contribute. You know, that brings up an interesting thought, because if you’ve ever seen this documentary that’s been presented by Jamie Johnson and Jamie Johnson and of course, is an heir of the Johnson and Johnson Company, you know, the huge, huge company. And they put together a documentary called Born Rich. And he’s seen in this documentary Searching for his life’s purpose. I think it’s pretty normal for Jamie to go to his father, John Seward Johnson, to get some fatherly advice in about what he should do with his life. Jamie’s father contributed that maybe he should give serious consideration to collecting stamps. You know, like postage stamps? I suggest that Jamie’s life purpose, his soul purpose is much bigger than stamp collecting. Okay, you may be saying enough, how do you access your Higher Self, since there’s no vault and no key? We’re down to how to find your Higher Self. It’s ironic that this is the same problem with slightly different circumstances as Stefan. In his case, he knows exactly where the 250 million dollars worth of bitcoins is located is – that part is easy. But if you can’t remember the key, then that’s a problem. Right? But what if the 250 million was in gold? It was just literally laying on top of the earth. No excavation needed. All that’s needed is to load it up and take it away. Finding your Higher Self, it’s exactly like finding the 250 million dollars worth of gold on top of the ground. Meaning ,you need to know where to go. So where is your Higher Self? Let me tell you, you’ll find it by quieting your mind. Your Higher Self, is the key to accessing your soul, it’s there right there now. However, the ego part of you has tried sneakily to keep it hidden from you. Ego games! The ego “thinks” it’s in competition with your Higher Self. Interestingly, your Higher Self is not at all in competition with the ego. It’s just quiet. Let me offer a little bit of a visual example of this. Imagine that you’re a parent of two children. Your oldest child is constantly crying, making a fuss regardless of the circumstances and regardless of what you and your spouse do. Your other child is quiet, never interrupting his or her sibling at all. Just because your second child isn’t yelling and is quiet, this doesn’t mean that they don’t have something to say. To hear your second child, all you need to do is quiet the first. That’s it, this means that you have to quiet your mind. Which means quieting the ego so you can invite, listen and hear your Higher Self. This is really important. Most of us don’t give any kind of consideration to this aspect of who we are. And it goes like this. All you have to do is exist in this moment. And as you do, it extends the opportunity for you to become aware of who you are – accessing attributes of all your experiences of the past – so that you can continue to go forward. In this moment free to exhibit and to express all that you’ve come here to connect with the infinite. You’re not alone, as your ego would have you believe. Getting in touch with your Higher Self is, of course, done in many different kinds of ways. But one of the most beautiful ways is to try or give meditation a chance. To be honest, meditation is the key to connecting with your higher. So it’s not the only way. Give meditation a try outside of your ego. Get in touch with your Higher Self by just becoming quiet, being present and allowing yourself to become aware of what you’ve come here to do, and of course, all questions, knowledge and understanding can be accessed in that space. You might try Freeing Your Mind Meditation Series, it’s a brand new series that are put together with an intention to help quiet the mind, obviously freeing your mind so you can get in touch with who you are and those things that you want to express while being here. And it’s much more powerful than just being quiet, meaning it’s actually designed to help you to reconnect to the remembrance of those frequencies or those energies that once. Well, was a part of your origin. In summary of this will make you laugh or this will make you cry is the simplicity of accessing your higher self. What we’ve learned as there’s no vault and there’s no key, nothing is hidden. There’s no lost password. So if you’ve ever thought that you’ve lost something on your state of lack or you’re still trying to find what your soul is actually doing here, especially now, be reminded that using meditation as a tool to get in touch with your soul’s purpose and who you are is very important and perhaps a beautiful opportunity for you. Freeing Your Mind Meditation Series is a wonderful means for you to get in touch with yourself. There’s nothing to do, but rather to move yourself into a state of being and consider using my Freeing Your Mind meditation series to get yourself balanced and on path to accessing your higher self. As I said, the series is designed to take you back to the frequencies of your origin. So it’s not just any old kind of meditation, give or try. As you meditate, you’ll find that that quietness suddenly gives your higher self the opportunity to express all of that knowledge. WRITE A REVIEW It only takes a few minutes. Your comments and review truly assist others in becoming a part of our spiritual community. Write a Review now SOMETHING MORE Contact Us Here Telephone: (480) 212-1961 More Podcasts My Octopus Oracle | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 64 Hi, I'mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…" My Story When does an Octopus become a spiritual Oracle?My Octopus Teacher is a documentary with an... Conscious Reflections | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 63 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryConscious Reflection"The Moment You See Higher Self You Are Enabled" - Weston JollyThere's a lot going... This Life Is Only A Dream | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 62 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryThis Life Is Only A DREAMIf it’s our physical side that creates the idea of separationin real life, do... What’s The Meaning of My Dreams? | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 61 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryWhat's The Meaning of My DREAMS?Being conscious of your dreams, and their meanings, could change and... Are you pushing love away? | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 60 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryHow your NEED to be liked can push love away.How needing to be liked is the very reason you're NOT... The post This Will Make You Laugh or Cry | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 65 appeared first on Weston Jolly - Spiritual Awareness. Expand Your Conscious..
28 minutes | 6 months ago
My Octopus Oracle | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 64
Hi, I’mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story When does an Octopus become a spiritual Oracle? My Octopus Teacher is a documentary with an invitation for Divine Connection. Maybe there’s more to swimming in freezing cold water than anyone, Craig Foster, can imagine. What does nature have to offer us in terms of our spiritual connection? (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 064 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: My Octopus Oracle Can conscious connection come from an Octopus Oracle? Recently, I watched a documentary called My Octopus Teacher. The story is quite simple. It’s about a camera man who gets burned out with his life… and retreats to the sea to escape. During his time away from his hectic life as a camera man, editing and traveling the world, he discovers an octopus when scuba diving in what he calls a forest of seaweed. What’s unusual about My Octopus Teacher is the connection between a clever octopus and a wandering man in search of something greater. If you’ve seen the documentary on Netflix then you’ll understand exactly many of the points I’m referencing. For those of you that haven’t seen the documentary, be forewarned that some of what I say my spoil you’re seeing the documentary for the first time. My purpose is to highlight the most incredible part of the life, which is way beyond the documentary. My question, can you find conscious connection in nature? I am not concerned about offering you scientific evidence as much as witnessing with you some incidents about nature’s constant conscious connection. Recently on FB I posted how Enzo Maiorca (MI Orca) who is a a world record free diver experienced with some wild dolphins. This is what he shared… “Years ago, while we were diving, a male dolphin guided my daughters Rossana and Patrizia, and myself, almost leading us by our hands, and gave us the chance to save a female dolphin who was tangled up in the meshes of a swordfish net. “I maintain that his brain waves influenced our minds. What is certain is that our arms were the stretcher by means of which we carried that poor exhausted animal, wracked by contractions, to the surface. As soon as she was on the surface, after breathing out foam and blood, she gave birth to a dolphin calf under the watchful eyes of her mate. The little one was led to his mama’s nipples by gentle strokes of the adult dolphin’s beak.“I like to think that on that day we reunited a family.” So how does a dolphin use brain waves to influence Enzo and his daughter’s mind to participate in some heroic act? Is it consciousness? Dolphins and whales in more recent times are known for being more conscious mammals of the sea. But what about an octopus? Is it possible that an octopus, any old octopus can extend a connection from nature?In this story, of My Octopus Teacher does Craig Foster, the scuba diver needing a break from his life, really create a connection with a wild octopus? If you watch the film, you’ll come to the obvious conclusion of … yes. So, let’s spend a minute to talk about how. Everyone wants to know how to connect and to create a conscious connection. I honor the fact that you may not be so drawn to going scuba diving to create a personal relationship with an octopus like Craig Foster… but let’s see what we can learn from this incredible connection. 1.) Craig was doing something fun. Swimming. He previously been lost in work with deadlines and all the things that come from doing something but sometimes we loose sight of the reason we’re doing it. So he returned to the sea. Swimming. We’ll unlike Craig I don’t think swimming in cold water is fun. Sometimes as cool as 46 degrees. I’m emphasizing this as what’s fun for Craig may not be fun for you. But honoring what is fun for you is key. This point is so important that most people miss it because it’s so simple. But doing things that make you feel free, fun or expressed in indeed a pathway to the Divine. 2.) Craig is swimming around a local community. What I mean is he’s not trying to cover the whole ocean. He ended up swimming in the same 100 yard area again and again. This is kind of fun to observe too. How many times have you been doing something that you are really not thinking? Without directly saying so, it appears Craig is enjoying the quiet of being “alone” and I put that word in quotes so you can hear it when you’re out in the ocean. What I mean is when you’re thinking that you’re alone. One could easily say that Craig was swimming alone in the ocean because of his fondness of the water and because like a boy he appreciated the beauty of discovery.Then one day, he discovers something. It’s an odd piece of oceanic art. It looks like a 3-D version of Jackson Pollack painting. Craig discovers a thing or an object that is covered in sea shells. These are dead sea shells so the fact they’re adhered to something that is covered in sea shells is interesting. Then it moves.It has life. Remember Craig is scuba diving so he can only hold his breath for certain limits. After taking a breath and coming back down to figure out what he’s actually looking at the 3-D shell art project has moved. It has locomotion. What is it? As your guide to this adventure, I need to highlight that when we discover something you could easily switch this thought to you being shown something. So, allow me with this understanding to switch that Craig was presented something. It would take him a long time to understand what he was shown in the very beginning. When we’re too busy chasing our dreams through never-ending tasks do we often miss the very things that are presented before us. Nature is very clever about this. It’s always there but it’s never ever pushy about forcing some conscious connection upon you. But it is always there. The Universe is like this. It never forces us to see, feel or comprehend anything spiritual but it’s always there. Dare I say, consciously aware… Okay, back to our story. After a new breath, Craig see’s the sea shell jalopy move. Then suddenly the shells are dropped and almost like alchemy the shells are replaced in a puff of smoke with an octopus swimming away at full speed. Craig, the boy-like discoverer, follows the octopus to a rock assumed to be his home in which the eight legged creature disappears underneath the rock. Even more importantly is how the octopus changes its skin coloration and even skin texture to match the rock homogeneously. This is the end of Craig’s first swimming lesson. But like the powerful seed of an acorn a seed has been deposited in Craig’s mind. 3.) The third thing to observe about nature is its constant invitation to consciously connect. Every day, as in every day, Craig goes into the cold waters to watch his new discovery of the wild octopus of the sea. If you’re listening and I know that you are, then you’ve already heard me say that nature is begging you to observe it. (If you want to continue to apply the spiritual equivalent then you must understand that the Universe is begging you to observe it.) So, Craig starts documenting the habits of this one particular octopus. Imagine swimming every day to look and find just one, this one, octopus every day. But that’s what Craig is doing. What’s he looking for? You may ask… Hang in there and you’ll find out. In time, the octopus recognizes Craig as a middle-sized and middle-aged white man swimming with super long and narrow black diving fins, scuba mask and breathing tube not as a predator. It’s amazing but you can see the octopus keep all seven legs securely attached to home-base, the rock, and reach out with a leg with its many tentacles to see who or what Craig is if he’s not a predator. Slowly, cautiously, you see the octopus reach out and touch the Craig’s finger tips, then his hand, and even his face mask. In time, the octopus let’s go of his attachment to home and releases to discover for herself who and what Craig is. For me, if I were an octopus, I may wonder many things too. Things like who has the time or the inclination to go swimming for 365 days with me- one octopus in the sea? Doesn’t Craig have a job that he has to report too? What about a wife? We know he has a son because he casually mentioned it earlier in the documentary. From the perspective of an octopus, doesn’t Craig have something better to do than come out to the same 100 yard kelp forest near Simon’s town in the cape of South Africa? Good questions for an octopus to ask, and frankly anyone else watching the film.It’s easy to watch a 90 minute documentary that took 10 years to make even after swimming in the ocean every day for a whole year trying to find just this one female octopus. 4.) The fourth thing we observe, is that the octopus reaches back and extends Craig an invitation. As much as Craig is being touched by the octopus the octopus is feeling out Craig too. As more time evolves, the octopus releases all his attachments from the rock and surrounds all of her legs around Craig’s hand. The picture of this is hard to imagine but this film captures it all. Well, it does capture the image perfectly but there’s something to see or to observe that the film can’t capture. And that’s Craig’s energy. You can deduce that something is happening that would allow a single wild octopus of the sea to reach out intimately and vulnerably like this but the film can’t capture it. You can feel it. If you hear and listening to my voice right now you can feel the connection.This is the spiritual connection of nature. And yes, it’s conscious. Let me continue about this energy. Another trip to the sea and Craig and his female friend, the octopus, continue their relationship. Craig needing a breath goes softly to the surface to get the required air his lungs so deeply crave and need and the octopus rides comfortably all the way to the surface. A true display of trust. This is a keyword. Nature does trust us. The more that we become at one with it, trust begets connection. And as you’ll witness here, connection of the most conscious and spiritual kind. Let me take a breather here, like Craig coming to the surface for another breath, we’re talking of a grown man taking the time to swim and document the geographic area of kelp forest looking for one octopus. Seeing the octopus surround itself around Craig’s hand seems like it’s a good as it could get. 5.) The fifth thing you see is that the octopus releases from Craig’s hand and actually connects itself with Craig’s body or what appears to be his heart area.This is obvious connection at a heart level. Seeing things spiritually you can see that there’s again an energy being shared here. Perhaps there’s energy being shared by nature in the form of a wild octopus at sea to share energy with Craig’s heart chakra. Perhaps a wild octopus from the sea has noticed that Craig, seemingly, has lost his way maybe even his very own identity. Perhaps this heart felt connection is exactly what Craig needed to feel alive again. I don’t know about you but before seeing this film I’ve never seen an octopus and a human interconnect in the way I physically watching the conscious connection of nature. As in things of the material world, things happen and the Craig and the octopus encounter an issue whereby the octopus retreats. Craig is divested that his action, commonly thought of as a mistake, was something that breached the trust of his teacher and friend the octopus. The octopus fled her normal homestead and Craig becomes a tracker of the sea. 6.) The sixth thing.We’ve heard of tracking animals on the ground because of their footprints, droppings, and how they might change the terrain based upon what and how they eat or even sleep but have you ever thought of tracking an octopus in water? Okay, okay, let’s bring all this down to some rational simplicity shall we? Finding an octopus that will hold your hand in the ocean is more than amazing enough. Having that same octopus ride on your body because of an energetic bound that is being created by all is beyond words…. But who would think they can find their wild octopus that has fled the community? Well, Craig did. Earlier in Craig’s life, as a cameraman in Africa, he watched native trackers look for all the tiniest of clues that were a part of the wildlife’s daily routine. Somehow this stuck with him and he thought he could track a wild octopus. I have to bring up what is typically in our minds. Who has time to find an octopus that has left its home? Is it possible to track a fish, crab, shark, and or one particular octopus of the sea? Yeah, I know what you’re thinking Yes, it’s possible. Biologists have tracked dolphins, whales, fish, birds and so much more usually with some radio beacon kind of device. But let’s be clear, Craig didn’t tattoo his octopus with a name, pulsating tracker or with any kind of technology. He’s literally swimming out there in middle of the freezing water of the ocean, trying to find an octopus that’s run off. Craig does what all humans do when trying to figure something out. Especially, if they’ve lost something. Craig started making a map. First of where the octopus once called home. And then he started mapping all the places he’d seen the octopus hunt, play or otherwise be. In making this map, Craig started looking for the tiniest clues as to what or where the octopus might be. In this daily observation, which has to be called what it is, which is practice. Craig takes his practice of mapping the ocean and finds all kinds of other things in addition to the octopus. For many people, this could be frustrating because we’re looking for one lost octopus and we keep finding shells, clues that may or may not have anything to do with finding the octopus at all. Certainly, this whole thinking isn’t rational. Trying to find an octopus in the ocean is worse that trying to find a needle in a haystack because at least the needle isn’t moving from haystack to haystack. Do you get my drift? This is insane right? I don’t know if Craig was thinking like this as he was too busy trying to think like an octopus. He continued his underwater tracking I think it was for weeks… 7.) The seventh thing. The octopus is found. A relationship is reunited and whatever was the breach between the Craig and the female octopus is resolved. There’s more to discover. 8.) The eighth thing.Craig steps back from the lens of his camera, his perspective, to see the big picture. It’s a considerable choice because he has the ability to interfere and to protect the female octopus but he thinks that he shouldn’t interfere. He watches the balance of nature from birth to death and how the cycle repeats. 9.) The ninth thing.All of this craziness, which Craig himself calls an obsession, comes to the end upon the death of his friend the octopus. Craig realizes that his time of observing this one octopus is up but because of all that he’s encountered he wants to explore more. 10.) The 10th thing.He shares his story. First with his son and then though the very nature of his gift to tell a story with film. He takes a chance and expressed how My Octopus Teacher 11.) The 11th thing.Netflix who eventually purchased the rights to the film originally turned it down. “but was seen by the right person and “it was like a bit of a miracle…that obviously makes a huge difference because suddenly you can reach a very, very big audience with your message. I mean the whole motivation behind spending so much time and what we do, is very much to do with conservation. 12.) The 12th thing.The octopus that Foster followed for so long was never given a name. Foster explained that he did that on purpose. “I didn’t want it to become like a pet or curiosity or just some arbitrary thing. This is an individual animal living this extraordinary life in the great African sea forest. And you know, she’s my teacher and that’s why I didn’t give her some arbitrary name.” Now let me string together everything we’ve heard about so far about conscious connection with nature: 1.) Doing something fun. 2.) Doing something fun while not really thinking.3.) Constant practice. I actually call this deliberate practice 4.) Nature offers us a conscious invitation.5.) There is connection that is offered in this invitation.6.) The more you observe the more you discover.7.) When a separation occurs, find your balance and come back to mother nature’s invitation for conscious connection.8.) The macro view of what’s real and what’s not.9.) A desire to explore more. A desire to go deeper within.10.) Sharing the experience.11.) Who would thing the world would want to see a movie about a grown man and an octopus? What’s the story really about? Conscious connecting by nature or the Universe.12.) A knowingness not to name the octopus. Or to even credit himself. Craig, stated decidedly, that the whole experience, including the filming, editing and distributing it was a miracle. Maybe that’s what we all need… more conscious connection with nature… to see the miraculous conscious connection in and around us. This invitation is ever present and ready for your consideration, acceptance or even joy! Come on, let’s have some fun! WRITE A REVIEW It only takes a few minutes. Your comments and review truly assist others in becoming a part of our spiritual community. Write a Review now SOMETHING MORE Contact Us HereTelephone: (480) 212-1961 More Podcasts My Octopus Oracle | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 64 Hi, I'mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…" My Story When does an Octopus become a spiritual Oracle?My Octopus Teacher is a documentary with an... 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36 minutes | 7 months ago
Conscious Reflections | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 63
Hi, I’mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story Conscious Reflection “The Moment You See Higher Self You Are Enabled” – Weston Jolly There’s a lot going in the world today. America is the leader in the world with over 200,00 deaths (As of this publication date: September 30, 2020) and it’s likely to go much higher. So what can be done? Is there something that you can do that would enable your conscious reflection? Yes, conscious reflection will enable you to see the truth. Predominantly there is one thing you can do -unify and become at one. If you want to really have some fun, you’ll realize your service of one another where true love is. During this time of The Great Pause, perhaps it’s time for us to go even further in our service of one another instead of what’s currently being displayed. Click on the above media player or read the full transcript below. (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 063 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: Conscious Reflection Thank you so much for joining me. Today’s podcast is entitled Reflections. Before we go, one more minute. I want to let you know why there’s been a pause in the consistency of my podcasts. And, of course, it has everything to do with the pandemic. Back in March, actually, March 11th, I made a transition from doing a podcast to doing teleconferences. Now, some of you know that because you’ve been joining us there, but maybe some of you don’t. So if you go to my website at WestonJolly.com, if you type into the search bar or you can search Google and you can type in the name of the teleconference, which is 60 Minutes of Truth in Uncertain Times. Now, previously, our teleconferences have been offered every Wednesday. And we’ve done 26 of them, of which they’ve all been recorded, meaning they’re there for you to listen to, which is the whole point of what I’m sharing is so if you go to WestonJolly.com Under events or again, 60 Minutes of Truth in Uncertain Times, you’ll see in that page that there’s a whole list, as in twenty six different recordings, you can listen to. And the reason I wanted to start there is because well, it gives you kind of an explanation of why I’ve been MIA with regards to podcasting. But we’re coming back to that. I mean that’s something I want to return to. And in addition, we’re NOT going to give up the doing the teleconferences. All I’m going to do is make a shift and offer the teleconference, which is again 60 Minutes of Truth in Uncertain Times, the first Wednesday of every month. So go to my website, hit events, and you’ll see when the next teleconferences and of course, all the instructions on how to join us. So here we are taking an opportunity to reflect. In this moment, the moment that you really see yourself as you are, you are enabled. You know, disempowerment comes as a result of choosing to see yourself, not as you are, but as you think that you are. Now, that’s not semantics or just words. There’s actually a difference in a true conscious reflection. This creates an opportunity of service, and this is the part of today’s podcast that I really want to emphasize. Today, there are scores and scores and scores of people that serve on the front line, and they are, of course, doctors, nurses, paramedics, physicians assistants and they are all in service of unity. Right? And currently, although they’ve got to be really tired, we’re currently past 200,000 deaths with regards to the covid-19 virus in the United States. It’s a shame to think that America is a leader in death —specific to a pandemic. Because of something that we haven’t done. People have been asking or trying to become aware of what that is, and I want to be very pointed about that , offering focused attention on why we are leading chaotically to create something ultimately that we don’t have to continue to create. But instead of putting our focus there, I want to put our focused attention on what we can do to create something different and how to do that. And more specifically, that it’s going to be done through this one thing, which is called becoming united. Now, it has to do with the pandemic, certainly, but it’s not to do with just a pandemic, meaning we can unite because of this drama like we have in past opportunities when we’ve been threatened as a nation, think 9/11, or being at war with another nation. And of course, if we go back in our history, we’ve actually been war at war within our own selves, meaning the civil war. And there have been many people asking and wondering when the challenges of 2020 is going to come to an end, hoping that somehow it’s going to slip away or that will return back to perhaps the way the things were done previously. And I’m here to tell you that that’s not going to be the case, as we are never able to go back in time. We always continue going forward. Sometimes when I speak with individuals in their relationships, I put them on a plane, meaning you and I in terms of would-be partnership. And I want everyone to understand that as we travel in that plane that we’re actually going six hundred miles an hour and there’s no place when we’re in flight that we can stop the plane. That’s true here in terms of our becoming aware and using this opportunity of pause to go within and understand that we are all going forward. It’s just a matter of how, if we’re choosing to do this through a disempowered state, which is something that we in terms of mankind has done since the very beginning. But if we’re really to use this “great pause” and I keep using that term, because it was given to me actually by my son, in honor of what this covid-19 or pandemic is offering us, which is a great pause to actually go within. And I want to credit my son for sharing his spiritual wisdom with me and certainly with all of us yet again. And yet it’s really important as we continue to go forward, because if we don’t find ourselves connected within our own selves and certainly to source and certainly with one another, we’ll find that we perish quite literally. And there’s a reason that we have called ourselves the United States of America, because there was a time that we considered being at one something quite important and it’s not lost. It’s something that we’re still working on and it’s something that we have to incorporate with the World; meaning, it’s not merely just the United States of America. It’s literally us becoming united with everybody, meaning becoming at one with there is no separation with regards to gender or race or or anything that we would use it as a division from one another that we would use as a what would be the word, a conditioning to create ourselves separate. See, there’s a part of us that has been delighted to engage in a state of separation, because every time that we go into a state of separation, we can point to some of the party in the idea that they’ve hurt us or they’re participating in something that would be outside of our realm of control. But see, this is the whole point. That’s why I started this whole thing with the idea that the moment that you really see yourself as you are, you are enabled. We don’t want to go to that dissected or that separate thinking that has us to be separate. That’s why I made the comment that disempowerment comes as a result of choosing to see yourself not as you are, but as you think that you are. So if you’ve been asking the question, what’s next, spiritually speaking? The key to going forward is unification. But don’t be fooled, it’s just going back in time to returning ourselves to what has been or hoping that, you know, the year 2020 will soon somehow quietly slip away. Because if we do that, if we allow that, then we will have not grown. And that’s individually and even as a collective group, meaning the whole world. Right. So we don’t really ever want to do that. We must use this time of conscious reflection to really understand how each and every one of us created this to be present in our lives. This is why the very first teleconference, 60 Minutes of Truth in Uncertain Times, I spoke very strongly, the very first one, about facing our fears. This is something that we have to do. The coolest part of our opportunity, if I can use that term, is that we really are here, meaning you’re here with me listening and participating in something that’s actually super grand on so many different levels that I wonder if you really do understand the levels in which we are participating, this beauty of the human spirit or love, the spiritual part of us that wants to connect, putting away the seemingly pieces of separation that we have through differing opinion, through different life experiences or certainly different perceptions of even of the concept of truth. But as you know, truth is truth. It’s not something that can be negotiated. There’s no such thing as propaganda or, “fake news. “We use these terms as a day as a means to deceive other people. And if you’re choosing to allow yourself to be perceived through the conduit to social media, even the formality of even some news networks that are not necessarily ascribing to what was traditionally a fact finding and bringing forth the truth in the news if you are allowing yourself to participate.This creates exclusion, and the idea that you’re only hearing part of the story, which is interesting because that’s exactly how our minds work. So before I get too ahead of myself, I want to talk to you about a story. An individual, a man actually who led his people out of bondage, taking them into the next step. And he was encouraged to take his people into a place that was called, well, abundance or a place that was called or expressed to be a land filled with milk and honey. And according to the story, he became one with source. In essence, he became enlightened. And the only reason that he was the only one that became aware is because he was the only one that made the claim. He faced his fears that being among them doesn’t a sound a little bit like what we’re having to address today. Some of this more so than than others. That’s to be granted and appreciated. Not everyone has had to actually face or visit somebody in the hospital as a result of the virus of the pandemic. And if you do, it’s a very sobering experience. It takes the idea of putting a mask on or off to a completely different level that regardless of your opinion, someone’s infected with this virus in a way that could affect their life as in permanently, permanently in terms of death. You know, it’s interesting because a lot of people like the story I’m continuing to recount, put their faith in a point of authority. In essence, a politician and a politician sometimes is there to represent the people supposedly that’s done and the freer aspects of the world and those other aspects of the world aren’t as free. Those politicians may or may not serve the people, although they claim too. But if you look at the political processes as a whole, it’s really apparent I’m being honest, truthful and very, very blunt that they really don’t seem to care about you, your health, your well-being. They only care about themselves and of course, and their entitlement. What I’m saying is, they want to keep their job, or power, or the perception of power. And let me be clear with this. We in terms of we the people have given them that power. In essence, we become disabled. And again, this is nothing new. So I want to go back to the account of this particular man who’s ascending the mountain, Mount Sinai. And of course, if you recognize the story, this is the story of Moses, who life was spared, according to this legend, and he was offered a life of great wealth. And opportunity and great power, and I want you to feel this, because one could say that this particular person was given the opportunity of a lifetime to sit where he sat.And yet, through personal awareness. Through, we’ll call it his coming to understand where his life, his power, his connection actually came from, beyond the physical king he was serving. He stepped away. He stepped away from his position of power, and if you can see it for what it is, he stepped away from one he was born into, or at least that what he thought he was born into because he was an adopted child. And so he stepped away from his mom and his dad and his family and of course, all of his power and wealth. To connect with Source, and to do something crazy, to lead his people, his people of his true blood origin out of slavery. That’s what you and I are still participating in in terms of allowing ourselves to be enslaved through the choice of being disempowered. This isn’t something bad. It’s nothing new, and it isn’t to be heavy as much as that we want to be really clear in terms of what we’ve created. So what do we do with all this conscious reflection, how do we take on the opportunity to become aware individually to ascend in the way that we hear or read of this account for this legend of Moses going up the mountain? And how do we become through that awareness and what do we do with that awareness? Well, if you see in terms of the story and it’s perfectly described, even as Joseph Campbell might describe in his book, Hero of a Thousand Faces, where we see that the person goes to have understanding, they become enlightened again. I’ll use that term and they come back. And this is the part that I’m putting focus on that becomes an act of service that heroes, so to speak. In this story, Moses comes back to participate with that information. Sharing with the people is understanding. And this opportunity is available for you and I today. We don’t need anybody. And let me be very clear. That includes me. I’m happy to facilitate until I’m blue because I love it. And I’m very drawn to this choice to be connected and to share this connection with Source. Of course, I feel very honored and blessed to be a part of that connection and to fluidly describe that with you so that we can become well reminded of what we actually doing here, which is in this moment of conscious reflection to be honoring who we really are and not just kind of not like I’m just here to do a day on planet Earth. We’re all going forward and so we’re going to participate individually. I think it’s important before we get into how we can serve one another that we actually have to be reminded a little bit. About who we are. I have a an unusual opportunity, meaning what I do, I have an opportunity to see you in ways that quite often that you don’t actually have the opportunity to see yourself and especially as a group. So I want to offer some of those reflections in some very specific details. I’m going to change the names and some of the details so that it doesn’t break any of the confidence I would have with any one person. But I want to do this as a means to create awareness in terms of this conscious reflection and also this empowerment so that we can become well in tune with who we really are. For the moment, I want you to look into my eyes. If you see me in person, they’re they’re nice eyes. (laughter) I’ll say it that way. And if you haven’t seen me in person, then go to my website. My eyes are clearly represented there. And there’s something about these eyes. That are able to see through what I will call the perceived places of resistance or even stories.That perhaps you’re even holding yourself back in this particular moment. So it is a part of this theme today in this podcast, Conscious Reflections, I want to reflect you. So I want to talk about many of you through some of these very specific stories. But then ultimately, we’re going to transcend into this reflection, using this empowerment to unify through service. At the moment, I can recall first meeting this person a very long time ago in a workshop that I was giving on the East Coast, and I had said something that was kind of amazing in the sense that the individual that I had never met before, I spoke of him and how he was participating in his work environment. And it was a public forum. So I’m able to speak of that clearly here. He was amazed, amazed in the sense that someone was able incapacitated to do that through time. And, of course, through many sessions. I’ve had the lovely opportunity to get to know this particular person in a most genuine and loving way. His upbringing was a little different, meaning we could even say that his upbringing was quite caustic. He was attacked with kitchen utensils when it came time to eat . A member of his family said,“I made you. And I can kill you.” Now be reminded this is during dinner time, so this might affect how someone might energetically feel safe, even comfortable to take in the nourishment of food, of which, of course, became an issue. But nonetheless, this individual, even in spite of those original conditioning of extreme disempowerment it’s important to see that he is actually a very beautiful boy. And I say that in terms of where he came from. And yet he has not lost that innocence, that compassionate side of him. And of course, his love for his family is actually very, very special, very unique. It’s interesting to see this because you wonder where someone coming from, that kind of background could pull those kinds of energies or those kinds of reflections, you can’t do that artificially. And so I’m saying, as a matter of reflection, that this particular person, while coming from an abusive background in many different ways. Was able to transcend, to actually face his fear, and now he, like everyone else, is in process of doing that. Sometimes we’re able to do that in a complete snapping of the fingers and we’re on a ways to do something entirely different. Sometimes it can take a minute, sometimes sometimes years, sometimes even a lifetime. But that is not the point of this opportunity to actually see ourselves as we are, because when we really go to the opportunity of knowing that we’ve come here to do something different than to regurgitate what has been extended to us beforehand in terms of a baton being handed to us and some relay race by moms and dads and others up the family lineage that we’ve come here to break those traditions and perhaps even the structure that in support of those traditions to step forward into really being who we are. And so in this space of turning to love is something really, well, fun to take a peek at. The reason I went through this particular account and this individual’s father was actually a professional accountant. And while his dad, you know, from a business perspective, would be seen as very successful and that of holding a esteem to professional career is interesting to see that the dad would need to resort to that kind of energetic dominant. Now, it’s seen all the time, and oftentimes when we get past that along, that’s why I used the word baton earlier. If a dad passes it on to a child and that can be a son or a daughter, and when that’s done and that individual actually thinks, please hear that word again, based on what we talked about beginning. Remember, disempowerment comes as a result of choosing to see yourself, not as you are, but as you think that you are. So if someone is referencing that thought that got implanted perhaps by somebody else of your own accord, that we are empowered better then or bigger than or above somebody else in terms of status, that’s an interesting concept. My son had an opportunity to actually live in London for a short time. I think it was like six weeks, maybe was eight in total participating in a film project. And his experience was interesting because he was observing things in the United Kingdom that I read about, but not necessarily felt. And he was describing how classes of people in terms of the Labor Class versus the other classes (i.e. Working, Middle, Upper, Aristocrats) were distinguished through this baton passing meaning through generations. And they actually identified that this thought is who they are in today’s podcast. It’s not. It is a matter where you’ve been born. And what conditions socially abusively or even of the most abundant kind? Imagine think of the the character Moses being born into all of this, Wolf, all of this empowerment, no one took it away. He could have remained there. It’s through his conscious awareness. He determined to say, you know, there’s something beyond what he’s doing in this politically appointed at that time based upon his belief system that this is something he was born into. And yet he denounced it and he said, ah, decide to pursue something different. Perhaps in light of what he was shown via source in terms of his ascension and of course, that was brought down to the people to share and to lead down this path, and this is why this opportunity of service is so important for each one of us. And yet we have to set aside these concepts that were somehow separate, that we are able to continue to go through this life. And the idea that somehow I as a human being and different than anyone else who is listening and participating in this world today for the future, and even before I was ever born, if I were to do this in a state of empowerment, then we have to get on board to again who we are and who are not. So I’d like to share with you another story about another party that I knew for many, many years. She’s recently deceased. She struggled with the entirety of her life specific to her body composition, most specifically her weight. Now, to give you a little bit more of a background. She was very intelligent and extremely spiritual, enlightened, if I can use a term very, very connected from a very early age. And because of her well, her affiliation to wanting to make change, she was actually very, very active in politics. And she served on many different campaigns to raise further political awareness as a means to create an understanding with other kinds of people. Now she’s doing this, also creating other kinds of expressions that were even more personal to her in terms of her spiritual expressions. And yet intrinsically, she found herself very, very challenged within her own body. This is something that she confided within me more than one occasion through the many sessions and opportunities that we had to be together in the presentations I was offering in those areas. So if you go back in time to see that, that there was something that was happening within her as she perceived it, that she needed to fight against. And what I mean by that is that she needed to create a resistance to. And I want you to think of a castle like an old castle, where there is literally a moat around the castle, which is created to protect other people who might invade the castle. And of course, that’s part of the reason that some people created castles, moats, tall walls, water in the moat, even perhaps unkind alligators in a moat. I don’t know, to create a division, a separation from we the people in the castle to those individuals or energies that are trying to get in the castle. Now, when this individual was a child, she took on the belief that it was not safe for her to be. Alive.Now, that’s remarkable is reflection, because she was a very passionate person, like I said, a consultant was working with AT&T or the Bell companies during that time, very well observed as a successful individual. Again, like I said, very spiritual and very political involved. And yet she always had this personal fight. I’ll even call it a civic fight. And we could even call it a civil war with regard to her own body and becoming comfortable with that. Now, I always knew her and I say knew her way beyond her physical embodiment. And because of that, I was able to tease with her that this manifestation that her body that she was never able in this lifetime anyway to to gain a balance with wasn’t something that actually truly represented her true self. And that’s something that a lot of people, many people struggle with even to this moment. And it has to do with people who can’t put on a weight to people who are challenged by having too much as a means to protect. And yet these reflections, these perceived identities back to the ego itself isn’t something that is truly us. And it becomes a point or a fulcrum of points where we choose to remain disempowered and ultimately separate. So I want to transcend beyond these couple incidences in terms of individuals having grown up being reflected to and what could be described as unkind ways.And appreciate that if we align ourselves in a true reflection of who we are, which is indeed empowered when we participate as our empowered self in the act of service, believe it or not, we become even more empowered. Now, I’m not talking about political service. I’m talking about and what I mean by political service. I’m talking about true service. I’m not talking about trying to esteems one’s position in terms of serving. I’m talking about service that may or may not get seen, measured or even paid for. And those kinds of opportunities are extremely.Opportunistic for you, because every time that you see a need which takes some time to actually get involved to to observe other things that people are going through and to actually become involved. And we’ve talked about this, too, in terms of my previous teleconferences. But as we move forward in this podcast, I think it’s really important as we reflect that if we’ve come here to remain connected to who we are in this very empowered state, then we do have an opportunity. It’s not an obligation or even a responsibility, and it’s certainly not an opportunity to remain in a higher class or perceived higher class. It’s an opportunity to just be yourself in service of another. And when we do that heartfelt plea, it changes our world. And guess what? It creates a unification. Have you ever been the recipient of someone else’s service in a time of great need? I can think of many instances. I can think of an instance where we were moving from cohabiting with my father’s house, which I believe or not. I did not know until much, much later in life that he had a drinking issue. She was an alcoholic, meaning I would not allow myself to see that truth. I grew up with it and it took living there with my my wife and family for duration of time for me to actually feel that, see that and in one sense almost drowned in that to address that. That was not me. And this particular occasion, we finally left that energy or that household to reclaim a household of our own. And yet we didn’t have a lot that we were starting a new business at that particular time. And in doing so, we were extended this wonderful opportunity from a stranger, meaning she didn’t know me. And I told her reluctantly a little about our situation because I was concerned that we weren’t able to necessarily afford the rent that she was charging in her condominium, which was not necessarily very large for our family of four. But when I explained in somewhat cryptic detail this very tender and loving individual who I don’t know very well. She picked up on the hint and she said, I have some experience with that, and I said, well, what do you mean? She said, Well, once upon a time I was actually married to an alcoholic. And with that, she made some financial concessions to my family that I could rent her condominium and that act. Of service, which indeed was monetary to our benefit for that duration of time for a while, actually, because as soon as I was able to get on my feet fully and completely, I was able to pay her what she should be paid for, that agreed space that we were renting. But that act of kindness, that act of love is something that you don’t forget. And when we offer that kind of compassion through words, through text, through emails, through sometimes flowers. Through just having thoughts and prayers for one another, it has an effect. If it took this, I would get down on my knees to honor every individual that is extended that and behalf of myself and certainly my family tree and many, many others. And yet we have that opportunity, you and I, right in this moment, to take this empowerment, this choice to be empowered, to know meaning what a blessing it is to have this awareness in this particular time. It would be very scary to be without it. I know of one individual who made a comment with regards to the pandemic and what what was happening in the the crisis within the financial markets. And he’s a financial consultant in the West Coast, and he made the comment that it would be very difficult not to have some kind of understanding as to the things that were happening. In essence, that he has an education and an experience to why the markets were behaving. I’ll say you radically, even not even drastically. And there’s more more of that likely to come. But what I’m trying to share is that our connection in this time of great pause to become aware through this reflection of truly who we are. And as we are doing that, which means that you don’t have to be in a perfect state, that we can be literally of service to one another. Take a moment right now to think of somebody, perhaps many people that you know and reach out to them compassionately with love. How are you doing? What’s happening in your world? There are many people that are locked up in some pretty confining areas, geographically speaking, and even the areas that they cohabitate are quite limiting, and that’s even in the United States. If you go outside of that, it can become even more, well, challenging to actually comprehend. Many of you’ve traveled internationally and so you can understand what it would be like to be in another country in some of the conditions that, quote unquote you visited. And yet these individuals all collectively need our help as we extend this hope or this kindness or ultimately this love to one another. This kind of reflection is not just a ripple, it’s a tsunami in terms of what it does, in terms of helping this place take us forward. And, of course, that takes us out of the perils of current economic challenges and or pandemics and a whole lot more. This unification is not necessarily just for the benefit of our coming together to have to. Sometimes, I guess we feel like this in terms of our family obligations, right where we grow up as a member of the family and we are supposed to participate in honor of the brand, the last name, you know, Jolly Brand, as this is a product of who we are and to be appreciated to a certain degree. But if we do this in the idea that this is we’re supposed to do or have to do, it’s very different than if we do this in service of one another within the family, then we as a family, I am speaking of YOU as our family. Everyone is having earshot of my voice. We can participate as a collective to quite literally move this place. And this movement is done through the leverage of our being connected to something much, much greater and using this awareness to share with those who want invitation only to be aware of something that perhaps they haven’t been. And it can be done in the most simple of ways. And that’s all I want to bring to your attention today with this podcast in terms of reflecting something that as you reflect kindness, love and compassion for one another. Or perhaps you can better understand where someone has come from, like the landlord that offered us a helping hand based upon her experience with participating with an active alcoholism. I mean, who would know that? But she shared it and its results that we had a point in common. And it was a dramatic point of common, but it was an opportunity for us to go beyond that and to help one another. And to some degree, I feel very, shall we say, delighted to share with anyone that opportunity to go beyond those kinds of places that perhaps you have felt previously or were told or socially conditioned that you couldn’t or you can’t. Of course you can. This is that opportunity to feel the nature of your empowerment and really allow this love that is, you reflected in everything that you do and everything that you say. Of course, not perfectly, but consistently as you so choose it. WRITE A REVIEW It only takes a few minutes. Your comments and review truly assist others in becoming a part of our spiritual community. 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60 minutes | a year ago
This Life Is Only A Dream | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 62
Hi, I’mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story This Life Is Only A DREAM If it’s our physical side that creates the idea of separationin real life, do your dreams remove barriers to create oneness? In this podcast interview with Andrea Fuller, a marriage counselor of three decades, she seeks understanding of a dream within a dream. Weston brings meaning to Andrea’s dream and other pertinent insight. Together they explore whether there is really any separation at all between dreams and this life we call reality. Divinely speaking, there is really no separation. Understanding this unlocks the knowledge that our dreams are bringing forward real and important messages that impacts our life and the world. Click on the above media player or read the full transcript below. (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 062 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: This Life Is Only A DREAM Weston: I want to thank everybody today for joining me for this podcast entitled, This Life is Only a Dream, and I have a special guest with me. And her name is Andrea. And Miss Fuller is from the beautiful part of California, Pacific Grove specifically. and she’s been involved in marriage and family therapy for, well, quite a while. Andrea, how long? Andrea: For almost 30 years. Wow. Wow. Weston: I don’t believe it either, So to say the least, Weston: You’ve had some wonderful opportunities to sit shall we say, in the 50 yard line and be in the midst of people’s processing. And that’s part of why I wanted to invite you here, especially on a really cool series of questions that we talked about the other day. So I was wondering, Andrea, if you wouldn’t mind kind of outlining that for us? Andrea: Absolutely. I’d like to begin with what started all of this to begin with. It’s like, one morning I woke up and I was very, very angry. And I don’t feel anger like that, ever. But I was so angry, and I was having these dialogues in my head. And it was so strong, that all of a sudden I went, ah, that’s my ego talking. It was so dramatic. This is the first time that I’ve had the visceral experience of, the ego is not me. It was almost like it’s talking to you. Somebody else, separate. Right. Right. It was absolutely amazing. So that was the beginning of my seeing the world completely differently. And I was grappling with the question of, what do you mean this life is just a dream. It’s real. I can taste it, touch it, smell it. So I was grappling with that. How can it be a dream? When that night, I was sound asleep in bed, and my dog ran into the bedroom, jumped up on the bed. Now this woke me up. I thought it woke me up, in fact I was still dreaming. And he burrowed underneath the covers. Now, it was so real to me. I was positive he was under the covers. And then I woke up, but I didn’t know that I woke up Weston, because I didn’t know I was still asleep. Yes. Yes. Andrea: And I looked under the covers, and he wasn’t there. And I was so sure that he was there that I wouldn’t give up. I kept looking. I kept turning the covers down. I looked all around the bed. Where did he go? I finally said, OK, it must have been a dream. And I went back to sleep. Now, I had another dream. I dreamed that I was sitting up in bed with my laptop on my lap, and I dreamed that I went to sleep, OK. And in my dream, the laptop fell onto the floor and made a sound. And, I thought I woke up. OK. And I sat up in bed and I saw the laptop on the floor. And then I woke up, but I didn’t know I woke up because I didn’t know I was still asleep. I thought I woke up with the sound on the floor. I turned on the light. Now I’m not really awake, turned on the light, reached to pick up the laptop, and it wasn’t there. Wow. And I thought, oh, my heavens, I was dreaming. And that’s when it hit me. That’s how this life can be a dream and feel so real. Weston: I think that is, of course, so beautiful for you to be so clear and concise about something that sometimes happens to us, and we still remain shall we say, confused. Or using your terms, not awake. And when we think that this place, this in-habitation, this embodiment is real, of course we create that illusion. And it’s really tough to discuss this because we want to fight for, this is real versus that is real, and of course, getting in touch with, shall we call the inbetween is the opportunity of all opportunities. Where does this take us Andrea, in terms of some of the questions that you have? Andrea: Oh, all kinds of questions. OK. When I dream at night, no matter how real the dream seems, I’m really in my bed. But where am I, during this dream of being a human? Weston: It’s an interesting thought because a lot of people, of course in the idea that we all have an ego, and I want to get that out on the table, because it’s something we’re going to be talking about throughout this conversation. It’s that part of this that creates the identity. And if you really see this question, that’s exactly what’s coming forth now. There’s a part of you that’s going through trying to identify or categorize where I am. Am I my body, am I outside of my body. And these are beautiful questions on an earthly or physical level. However, in our divine self, there isn’t a separation. So while we create the opportunity for us to be here in this space, we’ll call it this physical space. The reality is we’re not separate from that which we are in terms of our place of origin. And when we speak of leaving this embodiment and going back to our state of origins, or sometimes people use words heaven, or other such categorizations of the light, that that’s all wonderful, but we’ve never been separate from that. And again, the only place a separation comes from is this piece that’s biological within the body called the ego. It’s something that we don’t understand that much. But when we start to become aware that we aren’t who we think that we are, which means male, female, and or these experiences, or even these series of lifetimes that we’ve had, then it enables us to go even further. So let me answer the question with the following. That this idea that we are outside of our physical being is actually accurate. But we’re not separate from that. We’re never separate from that. It’s only the body or the physical side that creates that idea of separation. Does it make sense? Andrea: Yes, it absolutely makes sense. Yes. Good. OK, so now, this is the visualization I got, the picture that I got while you were talking. So we have the mind, and we have the split mind with the ego part that has created the fantasy of this as reality. And then we have the Buddha mind. The infinite mind. Yes. Okay. The higher self maybe. Right. Then if we’re not separate that would mean there’s only one higher self, and that’s why I can say we are one, Weston and I are one. It’s simply the higher self seeing reality from a different perspective. Weston: Correct. And again, you couldn’t have described that better. And I have shared this with you. Andrea, in our years of knowing one another, and that of your family as well. But in addition to the idea that I’m male, and the idea that you’re female and we’re our current age respectively, and that these experiences constitute who I am or who I think that I am. The reality is that what you’ll remember most, isn’t my blue eyes or necessarily my name, or that I was male. What you’ll remember is the signature, and that signature is much more permanent than, you know, fingerprints, and or the imprints of the iris in her eyes, etc. That form of, quote, identification in terms of that vibration, that illumination is unique and very specific to each individual. I’ll use the term, soul. And of course, by extension, that takes place in terms of each individual soul can have the opportunity, shall we say, the further identity to be male with these sets of fingerprints, etc, etc. But the idea that were separate isn’t true. And so what you just propose that, you know, you and I are one is why you hear language that way, especially when channeling, where you’ll hear the terms we, and the universal one. In the beginning for me. I didn’t understand any of that because I wasn’t exposed to that. But then. in time, somehow, not necessarily to my physical self, these things began to make sense, or I started to be able to integrate this state of oneness. Weston: And when we find that within ourselves, that we aren’t separate from one another, and I’m speaking of just you and I, or our family trees, or the community in the world at large, our ability to create is completely altered. Instead of me having to do it through the individual, quote unquote, me, we start participating in what I would call a harmony obsession. It’s a phenomenal opportunity. It’s something generally that women tend to do best. Meaning there’s a collaboration of energy that takes place within the feminine gender generally speaking, that’s that’s kind of cool. Males really sometimes have to work at that, if at all. Meaning, a lot of times males in a particular are very much asleep. And when when I say asleep, I want you to think of going to sleep at night. Meaning, they’re just not awake to the fact that there is an ability to connect. And this is why they propel themselves so individualistically. And even in, shall we say, the wonderful example of the ego. And we have some current examples. And I’m not going to get into this politically. But we have some wonderful examples happening on the national stage or the international stage in terms of how ego is running amuck. And these are opportunities for us individually to see, and even collectively, to ultimately create something different. That we don’t have to do this through ideas of separation. Andrea: Yes. Andrea: OK, these realizations are absolutely changing how I see the world, and how I move through it. Weston: Let’s talk about that. In what way, Andrea? Andrea: Well, I am now very exquisitely aware of every negative thought. Yes. Well, maybe not every negative thought. But lot more, right?. A lot more. And I’m aware of it in the moment. In the moment, or a judgment thought. And I immediately think, oh, that’s the ego, because the other part of my mind wouldn’t be thinking that way. Right. So, it’s quite profound in the way that I go through each day. Weston: It is. And you know, what you reference, of course, is going to be in the moment versus allowing the mind to go outside at the moment, which it tends to do a lot of especially historically, about what happened to me, quote unquote, me the perceived me, yesterday or the day before, 20 years ago, by my mom, my dad, the world at large. Then we regurgitate these things, as in broken records to go round and round and round and to hold on to this, we’ll call it false identity, and then it creates this illusion. And this illusion is, you know, I can’t be in a personal relationship because, and I’m going to fill in that story, of course, always of the past. If we stay present, and we negate that these pieces of who we think that we are are real, their experiences here, but they’re not necessarily real. And then we allow ourselves to remain open. Think of like a dry erase board, thats completely clean, to create something different. And all we need to do is become further aligned in that moment, and in terms of going forward, and then of course, we have the opportunity to create a different kind of journey. So think of the moon orbiting around the earth, and of course it’s caught in the gravitational pull. And this is us, being attached to our ego, going round and round and round without necessarily much progress. I’ve often made the parallel to watching the movie Rocky and Rocky 2, Rocky 3 and Rocky 4 and 5. At one point, how many versions of Rocky do we need to see before we understand that this is the same story with not much, shall we say evolution or personal development and growth. Weston: When we see that, that we’re attached to something, or we’re going in a cyclic pattern, it’s because of the ego. When we step away from that, then suddenly we slingshot out of orbit, or the moon, shall we say, shoots off into a new direction that we get to create, shall we say expanded and often times that’s done outside of our personal experiences. And that’s when we start slipping into something really, really cool. Now, you kind of mentioned this, somewhat quickly, but really cooly with your dream. Because, how many of us have a dream that actually feels so real that we wake up having ourselves challenged? Is what I dreamed real? Or am I still in a dream. Or is this real? And that is something very, very profound. And for myself, I’ve always had some enormous challenge in that area way before I even became physically aware. Now part of that is because I do talk in my dreams, as in out loud, and I also do sleepwalk. And that was actually an issue or perceived problem in terms of my growing up. Today though, I would say that to my advantage. And what I mean by that is it enables me to be able to be separate from this quote unquote reality, separate in a positive way that I am participating in the state of oneness, coming back into this embodiment and trying to figure out what’s real here for me, at times, is much more challenging than the other way around. The other side feels much more real there. Weston: My ability to do this or do that, or do something that would be perceived as okay in the dream state like flying, that seems very real to me. And yet, it is frustrating to be in this state and realize that I can’t participate in that way. Wow. But, that’s neat, and of course, its challenging, because this modality or this side of the fence seems to be pretty locked up with the idea that this is what we can do or can’t do based upon the ideas of separation that we continue to participate in. So, this is a marvelous opportunity to see how we can expand ourselves outside of the idea of who we think we are and to, shall we say, get further aligned, and to slingshot out of our cyclic patterns to create something that would be different, or unique, or of course, very much in collaboration to what you come here to do, and what you’ve come here to experience, and to create with others in that kind of way. And ultimately, I’ll say this as well. Quite simply, when we go into the state of collaboration, it’s very easy for us to work together because we’re not trying to position ourselves. I’m not trying to insert my idea as the idea, ahead of Andrea, or you versus me, because we’re not thinking in those terms. We’re thinking collaboratively, like, how can I further our contribution, doing what ever we’re going to do together going forward in that state of oneness, in the exact way we’re doing it right this moment? Andrea: Well, OK. My head is spinning. But as you were talking. I realized we’re calling it a dream. And yes, it’s a dream. But it seemed to me more like a virtual reality game. And yet you have the head thing, or whatever it is that makes you think you’re in another reality. But we get to change the game. And when that when that analogy came to me, it’s like, oh, I don’t actually like the game that I’m playing. Andrea: I think I’ll play another game. And I made some substantial changes in my life. Well, tell us about that. In what way? Well, I was playing the game of I’d really like to move to be closer to my son, but I really can’t afford it because I can’t afford to quit working. And, in that kind of a game. And anyway, it would be such a big change. And all of a sudden, I know exactly how I can make enough money to support myself while well in any location that I happen to be in. And I can be any place I feel like being. And I’m making the changes right now to make that move. Weston: Have you given consideration to what we’re doing right now, Andrea? Andrea: What do you mean? Weston: Maybe there’s a whole bunch of people listening, that might have need of your services, regardless of where you quote unquote, live? Of course. So this is a new expanse, based upon the old paradigm, which meant that I had to stay here to offer my services. And so the idea that we’re doing what we’re doing together gives an opportunity for others to say, well, Andrea, could I talk to you about, you know, family issues and or marriage issues? And the question, or the answer to that question would be, of course, yes. And it’s not really important if you lived in the beautiful area of Monterey, California, versus some other part of the country. And you opening up to that, is huge for you personally, and of course, the universe, slash the people are listening who want, need those kinds of services. It doesn’t bother them whether you live in Texas or South Dakota or Kansas, right? I mean, we, slash the collective, want to support that, because we’re not thinking that as a perceived limitation, because you, have removed that limitation. So I want to be very personal with that, because that’s something really incredible. When we make a paradigm shift such as you’re making, it enables the whole universe, the angelic realm, source, etc, to go oh finally, OK? She or he is out of the way, so that we can finally give them what they’ve been asking for so repetitively. That thing of like, from a parenting perspective, where we have a child who has asked for something and we have the ability to offer them what it is that they’re asking for. And yet we want to do that in harmony to what we’ll call the real ask. Weston: And of course, source is just not kind of wanting to do that. The instant that we have the thought, because here again, there’s no separation. Those things are made manifest. The only reason that those things retard, or that there are limited, or there is a delay of time, is because of those beliefs, thoughts or attributes of this game that you’re playing, or projecting, that this can’t happen. It’s like, oh, OK, well Andrea doesn’t believe that she can go from one side of the country to this other country and participate in earning an income, or that she has to do it all through her hands, well, we’ll understand that, but at one point, her body will wear out, and at one point she’ll have to realize it doesn’t have to be exclusively through her. Which means others can make that contribution in your behalf even without you having to do something. And I’m not talking about welfare. And this is incredible because it enables you to go, oh, wow. And then if you see this, becomes a point of leverage so that you can use this collaborative energy, and we when I say use, I’m not talking about take, but participate in this beautiful way to do something that we couldn’t do necessarily individually. So it’s like watching or hearing and experiencing an orchestra literally coming together with the excitement that the one sound is profound. But then there’s this collaboration of one, two, three or four sounds, and attributes of jazz as a musical medium is probably the truest sense of musicians literally doing this on the fly. And this is without ego. Because we can’t. Its not the piano player gets a lead, or force that lead, or the sax player playing this versus that. Weston: These things are done literally in the spur of the moment. And to do that well, as in really well, we have to be absent of having the idea that it’s me, it’s my turn, it’s my band, et cetera, et cetera. And all of that goes away in the excitement of this, again, collaboration to do something that, well, for those of us who are drawn to do this, that really want to participate in this way. And this is why this life is only a dream is, I think, perfect as an analogy to your actual dream. And also becoming aware that this thing that the ego, and our physical senses that supports that, my physical sense of support that I’m in pain, or the emotions that I’ve created historically that I still have today, or you when we project upon what would take place tomorrow is all going to be based upon my perception. But when we go beyond that, it’s like, oh, OK, we’ll finally your going to step out of the reality and maybe you want a different headset, or even participate as a different icon, than we have the ability to have access to this knowledge, divine knowledge that goes outside, of course, the individual means. And that’s in my world that the most incredible thing that I’ve ever experienced, and still experiencing, and of course, want to share that in terms of the direct ability to do that, but also that others can, shall we say, step into that kind of knowledge and that kind of awareness with our own self. Andrea: And what was really dramatic for me was, sorry, I didn’t realize that I was playing a game of not enough and don’t, cant. Didn’t realize that that was just, oh, reality to me, but it wasn’t reality. The minute I did this shift, it was like, oh, I can do . . . It opened everything up. Weston: It does. And isn’t it interesting, ultimately, how simple it is? Yes. Weston: We can go into the further aspects of how this interrelates on higher levels etc., etc. But the simplicity is that we literally are at one, and really feeling that then quote, creating in that space enables us to have the fulfillment that is, again, I will use my words in an unspeakable kind of way. That is just fantastic, its worthy of being able to grab my violin and be asked to participate with the orchestra. That’s just an incredible moment to join in in that state of oneness. Andrea: This just opens up all kinds of different ways of seeing everything. For example, when we . . . I do a lot of work with passed life regression. And what this would mean is all of those so called past lives or other lives are just a part of the same dream. Weston: You’re getting it good. This is great. Andrea: Wow. Wow. So once we wake up, we don’t have to be in the dream anymore. Weston: We talked about this the other day too Andrea. But this is absolutely higher level understanding from a spiritual perspective. And I sometimes, I tease that, you know, going to college where we have 101 classes, and 201 classes, and we have the 401 classes with senior level classes, and we have the PHD level classes. And some of what we’re getting into is certainly the higher aspects of understanding. But it’s really true that even our perception in a previous existence, when remembered, brought into this life is again a perspective of film, something like a piece of film that I now have access to outside of my physical embodiment or something else I did. And I bring it here. My first thought was why? Why am I accessing something that if indeed this is true, why am I bringing that forth today? Well, instantly I became aware that there was some patterns, meaning I could see some patterns of my previous life or previous lives compared to this life. And was like, that’s interesting. And why would I be continuing to again orbit around the Earth as this moon, or this gravitational object thats held in this way and this pattern? And of course, I realized that, oh, this is for me to become aware that I’m not limited to this pattern now that I’m seeing a couple lives. Weston: And that could be a specific thing that I did, or some experiences I did, or even personally as a whole. But it really opens up the door to further and greater understanding of what it is that we’re trying to accomplish. But the point of that. And that’s what you’re bringing forth, is that we’re not limited to this pattern of the past. And if you take this forward, specific to this concept that some people might misinterpret in terms of karma. We’re not doomed to the next life to having to repeat this again and again and again, unless that’s my perspective or my desire to do that. So, it’s not like I’m tethered to five more generations of me participating in this way. The moment that we become aware is like, oh, okay. I think that’s complete. And with that, the the karmatic piece of thinking that I have to do that suddenly breaks. And I’m off into another part of the universe, shall we say, discovering different kinds of things and of course, contributing to poor kinds of things. Andrea, how does this affect you and those that you want to facilitate or help? Andrea: Well, it’s huge in terms of rising above the rut. I don’t know what words to say. Rising above, I don’t have to do this anymore. Right. I don’t have to be angry anymore. The people that I help. Wow You know, therapists, quote, are not supposed to talk about things that are spiritual. But what I have found is people are hungry for it. They want to see themselves as something bigger than their tiny little box that they think that they’re in. Weston: Beautifully said. Weston: So. Andrea, I have a question. Yes. Why now for you? Weston: Meaning this awareness, this spiritual awareness, this paradigm shift of paradigm shifts for you to realize that this space, this life is only but a dream, just like all of us. Why now? Why now in your life? Do you have any thoughts to that? Yes. OK. You don’t have to share it, by the way, if you want to, please do. Andrea: Several years ago, I’m approaching my 80th birthday. And several years ago, I set the intention of making these last years inside the body to be the best that I can be in terms of really comprehending that I am one with source and becoming everything that I can be, while I’m still inside a body. And so I’ve been doing a lot of meditating, a lot of introspection, reading, studying, and primarily I think it’s the intention. I want this. I want this understanding. Weston: So, we could summarize with what you said, that you’ve asked for this understanding and here you are at the receiving end, receiving the understanding that you’ve asked for. Andrea: Yes. Yes. Weston: And isn’t it interesting, too, in terms of this time of life, meaning it’s easy, Andrea, for people who are maturing in whatever form that could be described. To grab the remote control to the TV and shall we say, stay stuck or stay asleep, mesmerized by whatever is playing on the television or any other form, that would be the Internet as well. But not necessarily digging in and going further. And yet there is some part of you that says Man, I’m not going to complete this journey without becoming even further connected in this realm, through this understanding and of course, lovingly as we’re doing here, this could be done absent of anyone else knowing. And yet here you are through our collective desire, to share this, because it has profound effect on others of any age. Meaning imagine Andre, having this thought that you have employed now, and getting this at 30 or 29 or 22. I mean, this severely changes that person, let alone the world. Andrea: It would change the world. It would change the world. Yes. Andrea: Think what the world would be like if everybody thought from the perspective of source, of the One. Yeah. Weston: Instead of what we’re literally experiencing this particular moment, where we have this great big, huge division. And the division is seen and, you know, politics if I that can use that as a term or a perceived term. But it’s really the same division that we have within us. What’s real and what’s not? Weston: And, instead of us thinking that we’re separate, which is what we’re seeing, again, take the country. We see this within ourselves? And when that changes… And it’s interesting to me, Andrea, you know, having looked at this for quite a while and certainly doing what I’ve done and continue to do. I find that our differences or states of separation always. I shouldn’t say always, almost always go away in the highest state of drama. Oh. So if somebody bombed, or there was a tragic event that took place in Monterey, California, regardless of color, with regardless of their choice of experiences, regardless of our historical past except etc. Suddenly all of that goes away, in our desire to want to connect. And it happens outside of us necessarily even thinking about it. Know, I won’t say this is true about everybody. There are people that are running away from 9/11 thinking only about themselves. But ultimately what you really see is all of these different classes of people. And again, perceptions of classes of people, being touched by something that’s extremely dramatic as a means to, shall we say, awakening. And those experiences they’re highly dramatic by themselves, of course, but they are portals of opportunity to become aware of how one we are. Now, we can go back into the illusion that I’m separate than you because I work on the top floor and you work on the bottom floor as a janitor mopping the bathrooms, whatever that would be. But if if we don’t see it and categorize it that way, we really see ourselves in a state of oneness, I’ll even suggest outside of the idea that we have to do that dramatically, it changes. Weston: Now, we have a long history in terms of human beings participating in drama as a means to become aware, or to throw us into to an opportunity to become aware. And it seems that we have some more of that yet to create. Having stated that. I think it’s important at least as not just as a kind of a concept, but as an absolute roadmap to those who want to participate, are states of connection doesn’t have to be done exclusively through drama. We can do that in times of peace, which is to say, I can connect with you outside the idea that we need to have a bomb go off in the backyard for us to say hello as neighbors. And this changes, how we connect or how we create. Now, like I said, we can go in and out of that. We can wait till the next dramatic event to unite, or we can say, you know, no, this aspect of our coming together is not kind of important. It’s imperative. And when we do, then of course, that becomes, quote, our reality. And that state of unity is something that’s seen actually outside of this realm. And this is why you see attributes of nature so perfectly interconnected. And then if you even take this world, and you set it in the universe that we think to be real as well, it’s perfectly in harmony as well. And if you see that, then there’s got to be an understanding that something’s going on here, that’s beyond, quote unquote, were the only planet in this universe that has life, etc, etc, Those are all ego based thoughts. It’s very interesting. Andrea: Right. You’ve said so much, but one of the things that I heard was, in times of high drama, we set aside the artificiality of I’m a woman, you’re a man, I’ve got light skin, you’ve got black skin. Those are just artificiality. They don’t matter. Right. And we connect on the level that really, really matters. Weston: That’s that’s the golden opportunity. Almost always that state of connection is instantaneous. Were the planes going down, we’re not thinking about what’s in our briefcase, or how expensive my computer is, or what kind of shoes I’m wearing. We’re thinking about literally participating as a group to get to the other side, dramatically survive, if I can use that term. And of course, we do this as a team effort. Now, we didn’t come in as a team, meaning we didn’t board the plane as you know, the ASU football team. We boarded the plane as quote unquote, individuals. But in this dramatic moment, we become a team and we’re all dedicated instantly without a coach, to getting to the side. And that means if you are having a challenge in the back of the plane because something happened to you, then someone else who’s stronger, who can take care of that will quite literally lift you and carry you off the plane. And those things aren’t even thought about because we want to in one aspect to participate in this heightened state of connection. And yet the cool part of that, from my perspective, is we can do that all the time. We don’t have to wait for, you know, the worst of the worst of human tragedy to bond or come together. Andrea: We can live every day as if we are one because we are. Indeed. Right. Well, then there’s one more thought I had. Yeah. Andrea: Now I have a lot to spare. Andrea: If this is only a dream, that means that we don’t exist as bodies any more than Tinker was really in my bed under the covers. That was no more real. And my body is no more real than that. That’s true. Wow. That is mind blowing. Weston: And we’re practicing that again in today’s society, especially with our evolution of technology. Andrea: What do you mean? Weston: We are creating all of these social media platforms as a means to have an identity to, what I’m going to show you what eat for breakfast. This is the vacation that I’m taking. This is who I’m dating. I’m married. This is my child. And I say this lovingly, but truthfully, these are all attributes of this experience, of this human perspective. These things aren’t wrong or bad, but they’re not necessarily, quote unquote, who we are. And at one point, we realize, especially the social media stars or the people who were movers and shakers, and those events, where you get behind the scenes and really see that it’s just like Hollywood where all of this has been done, being done for production value, not necessarily as reality. These people not necessarily live like that, and perhaps or even grotesquely depressed, although you would think based upon their outer appearances that they’re just happy and delightfully connected. The truth is that they’re not. So we’re using this this technology as a means to connect number one, but still doing through this very interesting, I’ll even call it barbaric means of coming together. At one point, we won’t need the technology, meaning we don’t need to have a cell phone or the phone that we’re having now to co-create this connection. We’ll do it outside of the technology. And with that we take take another evolution, quite the bump, I may say, to come further engaged in the idea that we can collaborate at that kind of level. Weston: What does that mean? Well, it means alot. It means that in the same way that I have access to another country, through technology that could be, again, a video face timing somebody, or a conversation, or social media. And all these things have happened extremely rapidly and certainly in our lifetimes, Andrea. And this at one point will continue to evolve that we don’t need to have the technology to create the unity that we’re having. For example, Facebook is, the only reason Facebook is a social media platform and others is because it fulfills our need to connect. Why? Why is it that we have the desire to connect so strongly? Well, we’ve been that way since the day that the telephone got invented, that it enabled me to call my sister in Cincinnati when I live in Arizona. And the idea that I had a sister that lived there and that form of connection creates that artificial bridge. And we’re practicing through technology to get to something that’s ultimately innate within us as we do that individually, which is in one sense another step, we can go outside of this realm, which is something of course I’ve been practicing, and you as well in certain degrees to connect outside of this realm to bring that knowledge, that information, or even that awareness into this realm because we can. Weston: There’s no other reason, no other way to put that. But it’s very exciting to see that we’re in this very exciting opportunity to become aware, and to use our current states of awareness to further our connection instead of being separated. So even as the moment, there’s a lot of people, especially in the well, call them the 35 and beneath that are very, very dependent on these technologies as a means to connect. In essence, they’ve forgotten or shall we say, haven’t been as exposed to how to connect on a true social level, in the same way you know we may greet one another without our phones, Andrea. That wouldn’t be a problem for us, for other people that would be a huge issue. And this is part of what I’ll call a pendulum swing so that they can experience that, shall we say the drought of having to be so dependent to get a date on Tender, and thats the only way that they can get it, as opposed to actually walking up to someone and says, hey, would you like to dance? And the reason that technology is used in that way is it creates a buffer like a liaison to make it easier for someone to make the ask, without necessarily getting tagged again in the perception that you can get hurt, which is of course, ego or the separation of oneself. Weston: And when we say I can’t get hurt, and I don’t need technology as a liaison piece to have interaction with somebody, then we offer ourselves in this more conjoined way outside of the borders of me being male, you being female, outside of the borders of we living in the two different states, Andrea. Outside of the idea that we have different countries emerging and coming together, and even outside of our physical realm, this realm, engaging with other quote unquote worlds of which we haven’t done yet. And when that takes place, then we will not see, shall we say, this new race that’s introduced to us outside of our perceived perception as critical of the enemy. I mean, every Hollywood movie that you see about aliens is always about how they’re going to consume Earth. And it’s crazy to have that as a thought. But yet that’s something that people still cling to because again, it sells movie tickets. It excites the need to be engaged in a fear, fearful based state. But the excitement of coming together in the state of oneness is what we’re doing. We’re using technology as a means to get further down that path. And yet we ultimately don’t need it, and we don’t have to do it through drama, which creates even well for the opportunity of how fun this can actually be. Andrea: Yes. Andrea: Yes. Other planets, other universes, other dimensions. Oh, that’s where I want to go. Then when this body dies, I can go to the invisible non-physical realm. There are non-physical beings that are as real or maybe more real than this body. And do they really help us? Do I really have nonphysical beings that are supporting me in this physical world? Weston: The answer is yes. Emphatically. In your choice to allow it, which means conscious choice, and or unconscious choice. Andrea: So, this whole concept of returning to source. Yes. is a matter of eons in terms of physical time. Weston: Lay there, done for me one more time. OK. Andrea: I think that I have had millions of years of reincarnation. OK. Now, that’s just physical time. In reality, it all happens at the same time. There is no such thing as time. But then if there are nonphysical beings that are assisting the physical beings, that would mean that they have not fully completely returned to source Weston: That is something that they’re wanting to experience. Right. Andrea: Exactly. But when, we actually all return to source. My understanding is it won’t happen until it all happens. Then, will we not lose our separate sense of identity, will we not? Yes. Weston: Yes. I think of, there’s a great documentary that’s called 20 Feet from Stardom, and it’s a documentary about backup singers. Some of the best backup singers in the world. And the point of this documentary is that 20 feet is the distance from where they sit or stand onstage to be seen in a completely different way as a front runner. But if you hear and listen to the spiritual aspects of that documentary, which you really get in touch with, there is a desire by these clinical backup singers to create a unity of one voice that’s more important to them than being out front. If you hear what I’m trying to say, it means that they move into an egoless state. It doesn’t really matter if they’re standing 20 feet from stardom, which is in some people’s perceptions, the ultimate goal, this is what we should do. And they choose not to because there is a greater joy in becoming at one with this, with these voices that would be other backup singers, the music at large, of course, the audience and of course, whoever quote unquote is concievably only in the lead in that particular moment. Now, the lead singers who are aware, know this, meaning they know that it’s not just about them. They know that these wonderful, outstanding players who could easily come forth and grab the microphone in terms of being out in front, choose not to do that based upon some spiritual desire to collaborate. Weston: And that is an extra ordinary attribute. And mostly it’s done again through the feminine energy. Regardless of that, backup singer is male and or female. That there’s a male singer in that way understands, and that’s not a big deal for someone else to be in front, 20 feet in front, so that they can support that through this joyful connection. When we do that with the components of our spiritual supporters, then it having to be me, in terms of being the one that’s up front is a whole lot less important than participating with the collaboration. And once someone becomes aware of this, the idea that me, the person or me holding the mike is crazy, because when I go to speak over, I gotta share, it’s never about me. It’s always about something that’s coming through me, and the backup singers that I’m referring to are, should be in front, meaning that they’re much more profound than my voice, or my mind trying to express is, and ever could be. And yet there’s a collaboration in terms of me allowing that, to be a part of that. So the reality of us connecting to those spiritual energies in this room is as encouraged as you would want it to be. Weston: Now, again, I answered the question that that kind of interconnection takes place, if we’re consciously desiring that, that can be reminded, Andrea, how you got to where you are, in your 80th year, that there’s some part of you that says, I really want to further down this path and becoming aware. And because of that boom, here you are being shown that light is only but a dream. And in that, everything starts to click. And then in that understanding in this room, it begins to extend to this other route. And so the opportunity to be, shall we say, assisted or collaborated or participating with, the illusion of backup singers if I can still use that analogy in reference to the spiritual entities that are supporting us in this room. Oh, my goodness, it’s so much more profound in terms of that kind of assistance than anyone can possibly imagine. And I’m talking about people that really have a strong imagination. It is insane in terms of how much support there is, and all we have to do is open to it outside of the idea that it has to be done through the limitations of your mind, or even perhaps even how you’re trained through your belief systems. It’s an incredible opportunity to extend yourself in a set of cooperation that is well out of this world. Andrea: Well that just gives me goose bumps, because that takes me out of any concept of this individual is important, or unique, or, do you know what I mean? I mean. I do. It’s not me, known as Andrea that has any importance whatsoever. It’s the whole, the wholeness. It’s the entire band. It’s not one performer. Exactly. It’s. Wow. That takes away any ego need to be seen or heard. Or wow. Andrea is so smart. It takes it all away. Weston: Indeed. It’s not. It’s not about me, the preceived individual with blond and blue eyes. It has nothing to do with that. And that’s why have many things that I have done and still do I feel uncomfortable associating my name to that, because it’s not me. Meaning I’m a part of it. I do honor that. But it’s not me, even though I’m seen as the front man, or the person that is onstage. But if you look behind me in terms of you look behind stage, in terms of 20 feet, that stage isn’t big enough to literally show you the individual, or the group that would be watching what kind of contribution is taking place in this collaboration. And that becomes the magic. Andrea: And even more so, it isn’t anything to do with the individual. It is, if we allow it. The bigger purpose is coming through us. Weston: Agreed. Weston: Andrea, tell me, or slash us, why you feel so compelled to ask such a thought, be rewarded with the idea of becoming aware that you’re not limited to your physical centers, and or that embodiment under your dreams. And tell me, you know, why this is so important to you now? Andrea: Well, for a long time, I have really had a deep desire to be the catalyst for people to see that they are bigger, and greater, and more capable and competent than they think they are. And, what I’m thinking and feeling right now is just that concept on a much bigger scale. If I just limit myself to what this one body can do. It’s not enough. But if I expand and allow the cosmic consciousness, so to speak to come through me, incredible, incredible results will follow. Did I answer your question? Perfectly. Weston: And do you understand that? Andrea, you’re the one that has created this podcast. Andrea: I’m not sure, but you may know. Andrea: And I’m kind of like, wow, I can’t think anymore. Weston: Fine, That’s fine. And we are going to summerize in half a moment here. But I want to share with you that this catalyst of understanding in terms of something thats taking place with you and I most recently in a conversation that was happening during a session, I just felt divinely inspired as a result of you to ask you and even somewhat drag you here, and I hope didn’t have to have to do that. But to invite you to do what we’re doing today, because it is so valuable to me, the individual, and the perceived idea that I am separate than you. But so much more to connect to this cosmic side of who we are realizing that this is something that we can create together through a state of consciousness and in the state of openness, there is just so much to do, so much to create, too much to experience outside of the idea that is just me, me, me, me, me, me, me. And this opportunity for us to step into that and to really feel that, to me is so exciting. And that’s why I just felt so again inspired by you. Andrea, through the questions that you were asking, and are asking again today, to share with us and to have a great understanding of what we can be consciously in terms of our physical incarnation here, realizing that, you know, obviously we are powered by this battery pack called the body, which fuels the temporary existence of the mind, slash the ego. Weston: And of course, all of that’s going to die. But what won’t is this understanding, this truth, this connection that you and I and others who are listening to this podcast really found ourselves connected to, and bound to for reasons that may sound funny, or are difficult to explain. And yet, when we feel it and we move based upon that, it literally accomplishes what you wanted to put forth, to change the perceptions of others, to offer a different kind of a path to a greater kind of an existence outside of this realm fulfilling the needs of your clients. Andrea, who are wanting to have a spiritual connection when sometimes in therapy these things are said that we shouldn’t talk about that. And yet there’s a hunger, I mean a real, real hunger for individuals to become aware of who they are and how they’re connecting with one another. Andrea: Yes. Weston: Andrea, and in sense of the word, and I mean this having known you, and my wife and I for a long, long time. I’m so grateful to you. And I’m so grateful for your opportunity to participate in my life, let alone again in this contribution in this moment. So please allow me to express that. Andrea: I thank you profusely. And, you know, the same is true for me. Weston: Thank you, Andrea. What a wonderful opportunity to share the space together. Andrea: Yes, it is. I’m very grateful for it. Weston: Me, too. Thank you again. And please lets have the opportunity to continue this path together. Andrea: I love it. Thank you. Okay. Bye. WRITE A REVIEW It only takes a few minutes. Your comments and review truly assist others in becoming a part of our spiritual community. Write a Review now SOMETHING MORE Contact Us HereTelephone: (480) 212-1961 More Podcasts This Will Make You Laugh or Cry | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 65 When you’ve lost something important there can be a lot of stress in trying to remember where you put it, or perhaps of extreme value and you can’t remember the password? Listen to this it will absolutely help. My Octopus Oracle | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 64 Hi, I'mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…" My Story When does an Octopus become a spiritual Oracle?My Octopus Teacher is a documentary with an... Conscious Reflections | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 63 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryConscious Reflection"The Moment You See Higher Self You Are Enabled" - Weston JollyThere's a lot going... This Life Is Only A Dream | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 62 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryThis Life Is Only A DREAMIf it’s our physical side that creates the idea of separationin real life, do... What’s The Meaning of My Dreams? | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 61 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryWhat's The Meaning of My DREAMS?Being conscious of your dreams, and their meanings, could change and... The post This Life Is Only A Dream | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 62 appeared first on Weston Jolly - Spiritual Awareness. Expand Your Conscious..
26 minutes | a year ago
What’s The Meaning of My Dreams? | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 61
Hi, I’mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story What’s The Meaning of My DREAMS? Being conscious of your dreams, and their meanings, could change and impact your life in more ways than you can imagine. Have you ever wondered if there is real, not imagined, spiritual significance to your dreams? Is it possible for you to know the real meaning of your dreams? Dream interpretation is really important if you’re wanting to be conscious in your spiritual development. Uncovering your dreams may offer you real purpose and meaning to your life. Listen to a dream case study in how to understand the content of your dreams. Dreams are often symbolic and while there can be many meanings, often the real message of a dream is right before you. Listening to messages that come in your dreams can change your life. And if you’re interested, your dreams can even change the world. Click on the above media player, or read the full transcript below. (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 061 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: What’s The Meaning of My Dreams? I think it’s fair to say that almost everyone has had a dream in which they awoke wondering, what was the meaning of that dream? What if the meaning of your dreams had such impact that it could change your life and that of others? Maybe you’ve never thought of your dreams in this context. Although dreams are accepted as biological part of your being human, you might find it amazing to discover just how important your dreams are. Let me say this another way, your dreams are so much more important than you can possibly imagine. Let me share this true story about a dream an acquaintance of mine had. His name is Barry. Barry was leading an ordinary life in a small town; married and as a car salesman. Everything was normal as apple pie until one night, Barry had a dream. According to Barry, his dream was not a run-of-the-night dream but a special dream. (I want to talk more about this thought later so make sure you remember this special dream part. Anyway, Barry was carrying on in life as he always had until this disturbing dream captured his attention. It was filled with details. So much so that he awoke remembering exact measurements of a large wooden box that he saw in his dream. The box he saw could be described as a coffin. The box in Barry’s dream was big enough for you, a full-sized adult, to climb into and to lie on your back, again, just like a coffin. The top lid of the life-sized wooden box lifted up, but for anyone to actual enter or exit Barry’s box this was to be was done exclusively through the side doors. The occupant of Barry’s box would have very specific lights and mirrors placed in the top cover of his box. These lights and mirrors were to be placed at very specific angles, given very precisely to Barry in his dream. In Barry’s dream there was music in the box. No change that, it wasn’t just music but sounds that somehow coordinated with the lights, twisting and turning above your head as you would lie on your back face up in Barry’s box. At this point in our story, I’d like to take a pause. I think that Barry’s dream is pretty average as far as dreams go. While I can’t say that I’ve dreamt of a coffin-like box, where you lie in it to watch disco twirling red, blue and yellow lights as you lie on your back is something I’ve dreamt about, but clearly Barry did. Oh yeah, don’t let me leave out the stereo speakers playing music, or new age sounds, vibrating the box in coordination with the disco lights. Okay, as far as dreams go, I don’t think Barry’s dream is all that weird. Do you? I’m going to presume you’re sitting there listening and nodding your head no. I’ve had stranger dreams than this but let’s get back to listening more about Barry’s dream. Barry felt something unique about his dream, of this wooden box and its fascinating accessories. The dream didn’t make any sense, but something about Barry’s dream felt real. Barry wrote down all the detailed things that he had been given in his dream and begin to build a box that had eerie similarities to a coffin with disco lights and music. Yet, somehow Barry knew that his box wasn’t a box of death but a box of life. Somewhere along the way, I’m presuming after his dream, Barry sold his car dealership. Barry decided that he was going to build his life-sized music box with lights in his garage. Also, somewhere along this same time period, Barry’s wife determined that she’d had enough of Barry’s dreams of a wooden box that you could climb in to hear music and look up at the lights —she wanted a divorce. Barry kept tinkering with his box. And after building several different versions of the box, Barry determined to make a prototype. To be clear, Barry wasn’t a scientist, electrician or even that good of a carpenter. Barry took his blueprints, or the schematics that came to him in his dream state, to an intellectual property attorney. Barry somehow believed that his box could heal people. Barry, completely out of his field of expertise, gave his attorney the exact details he used to build his box. The angle of the mirrors, the type and wattage of the lights, the wiring, the way the lid opened, how a person would enter the box through doors that opened from the side and so forth. He also listed the benefits someone would have in lying down in the box. From the way Barry told me this story, his attorney asked, “How did you come up with the idea?” Barry, responded sheepishly, “it came to me in a dream.” The attorney took formal note of Barry’s response writing down all the information to submit Barry’s claim to the U.S. Patent Office before responding, “Actually, I hear that all the time.” Barry, still embarrassed said, “but I’m not a physicist, doctor or an engineer.” Barry’s attorney stoically said, “I see a lot of people who don’t have degrees or experience inventing things like your box all the time.” Barry told me everything I shared with you when I personally met him. Barry is the inventor of something that he likes to call his wooden box – a life vessel. A box that resonates with light and frequency in such a way to rebalance the body’s nervous system. Oh boy, did I forgot to tell you that Barry’s box also vibrates? Barry’s box is called a Life Vessel. The first time I met Barry was with Elizabeth Kuber-Ross in tow. Elizabeth was severely bed ridden and another friend suggested we take her to get in Barry’s box. I didn’t think very highly of the whole healing box modality… well, you don’t want to know what I originally thought. I did trust my friend and I did think that lying in box couldn’t really hurt anybody. And after all, Elizabeth was in some pretty severe pain. At the very least she’d get out of her bed and hopefully the day wouldn’t be a bust. After taking Elizabeth on this all-day venture to put her in the coffin-like box, something was happening to me as I sat outside in the waiting room with my friend. I could feel it. I could feel the vibrations coming from the box. Certainly, I could hear the music but I couldn’t see the lights. In helping Elizabeth into the box, I did look closely at the mirrors shaped in a hexagon like shape where Elizabeth would no doubt be looking when she looked up. It all looked pretty harmless. Today, Barry sells his life vessels for about $100,000 each. In addition, Barry has about 17 franchisee’s all across the country who have purchased two boxes or more, at each location, so that individuals can come and use the box on an hourly basis. So, what does it all this mean? It means your dreams are much more important than you could ever imagine. If Barry can bring forth blueprints of how to make a healing box with frequencies and lights what can you do? The purpose of this podcast to bring awareness and further meaning to your dream. To no longer care about your dreams is no longer an option. Generally speaking, I’d say most people think of dream interpretation as something entertaining at best. Certainly, that’s not entirely true because some aspects of psychology do give credence to some of your dreams. What if accessing the messages from your dreams actually could change your life? The particular dream of Barry’s life vessel certainly changed his life and many others too. What if your dreams weren’t just weird and funny? What if they actually meant something? And what if they meant something all the time? Not just the once in a while meant something kind of way? Would you be more interested in what your dreams might mean now? In Barry’s case, one might summarize that he made millions from the meaning of his dream. Another, might say that Barry’s dream cost him his marriage. And in Barry’s case, maybe both of these things are true. To access the meaning of your dreams you’ve got to remember them. (Laughter) On some level that’s got to be funny —right? We all have dreams. So how hard could it be to remember your dreams? Well, spiritually speaking, I think this is pretty funny. While I am going to spend more time in the future offering you opportunities to get in touch with your dreams, in this instant I’m most interested in you determining the meaning of your dreams. Let’s get specific as to the meaning of our dreams from a spiritual perspective. Let’s take this dream and determine its meaning. I’m going to present this dream in the first-person narrative. Let’s call this a dream case study. That sounds pretty scientific doesn’t? Okay, let’s begin our dream meaning case study. Oh, hold on, I forgot to tell you that this a man’s dream. This is relevant as this can make a difference in determining meaning of the dream. I was walking down a concrete sidewalk in a small subdivision. The houses were moderately sized homes the you’d see on the West Coast. The neighborhood was nice, I’ll call it middle class, and the kind of place that you wouldn’t be afraid to raise your kids. The streets were wide open and there were plenty of nice tall elm trees that outlined the sidewalks. It was a nice sunny day and I was walking up the street on the sidewalk on the left-hand side of the street, facing oncoming cars. I noticed a really nice white house on the corner with a chain link fence separating the side walk from the front yard of the house. The house was white with maybe some grey trim, but predominantly large in size and it had a long driveway going down the side of the house into the garage which abutted into the back yard. For some reason, I felt compelled to walk into the house. I didn’t ring the door bell, I just walked in and opened the front door. Immediately I noticed that there was a hurried urgent kind of energy, the same kind you’d notice around a nurse’s station next to an operating room. The human traffic was busy and people were coming and going in various directions all very directed, sincere and focused. I walked into what should have been the living room but there were people, like doctors and nurses, helping somebody who was lying down. I immediately started to assist and the person I was helping immediately was better and got up and left – healed. Then I was called into the next adjoining room and the situation was different but a patient was in need of assistance and I worked as fast as I could. As soon as I was done, I was called into another joining room and I could see that the whole house was predominately square with the four rooms filling the main living space. In every room there was bed, like an operating table, and in every room, there were more and more people that needed help. As soon as I finished with one person, I went through a door that would take me to the next room were someone was in real need of help. I also noticed that I was going around from room to room in a clockwise fashion and although I was working as fast as I could it felt like the number people that needed help was much like a MASH unit. MASH is an acronym that stands for Mobile Army Surgical Hospital. The people were coming in huge groups and while I kept going around and around the house the effect I was able to offer was limited to one patient at a time. The team of people offering their help were tired but relentless in continuing to offer their dedication and assistance to all the people in crisis. After noticing that I was going around in circles, helping people but at a very limited pace, I’d had enough. Immediately, I flew straight through the roof of the house into the sky and then way up into the emptiness of black space. I was looking for something then I found it. It was something I had been looking for my entire life. It was the origin of all things dark and negative. It was huge. It was a black hole. I was in space excited that I’d found the place where all dark and evil came from. I immediately raised my hands like I was holding a baton to the orchestra to eliminate the origins of all things negative. I should take a moment to share with you that when I use the phrase that this was the origin of all things dark, evil and truly bad I’m speaking of the absolute worst things imaginable. This wasn’t a place where some evil existed it was the birthplace of all things negative. Again, with both my hands in the air as I was about to condemn this black hole and all that was in or influenced by this place. But then I was told by guides, Archangels and several other beings surrounding me that, “I shouldn’t do that.” Confused, I looked at the one predominant Archangel, on my right side, with clear intention that I was going to do what I stated and take this whole black portal out. It wouldn’t take but a minute and I knew that I had the power to do it. Again, there were many around me, all in the light, asking me not to remove the origins of darkness. I wasn’t taking “no” for an answer and I was about to commit my arms, hands and energy to destroying that which had caused all evil throughout the entire world and the Universe. Frustrated at those who were surrounding me, and thinking they didn’t understand the nature of what I had found or what I was about to do, an archangel, I’m pretty sure it was Michael, touched my right elbow from the bottom with arms and hands still being held up. He said, “You don’t want to do this…” and he smiled at me. This smile really touched me with an understanding that if I should destroy the center of all evil that it would upset the balance of what was still being created. I instantly knew, while I could finish what I started and that there would be no more having to take care of people one by one who were countless flocking to the house below for help but it wasn’t my place to destroy evil. I put my hands down to the relief of many who had gathered now surrounding me and I said allowed, “I understand.” I watched and felt the gigantic pull of the black hole that was so strong that it supposedly swallowed up The Light. I watched in honor of the Billions and Billions of beings, spiritual and physical, that were held in a mesmerized trance to the blackness. It was the exact opposite of looking into a camp fire. This darkness, this black hole was amazing and it also was something that you could get lost starring into the cavity and the depth of the darkness. I wasn’t interested. I had enough. I flew back down from the depths of space and back into my body outside the white house where I was originally walking on the sidewalk. The house was still filled with a frantic energy and even a desperate cry for help, and certainly thousands and thousands of people wouldn’t be able to be healed at this one healing house. But I now knew it all was for a purpose. That’s it. That’s the dream. So, with all of you as witnesses to this case study in determining the meaning of this dream, what do you have? Believe me there’s a lot here! Let’s start out with some of the simpler pieces. Why was the man walking on the left side of the sidewalk? Did anyone get this? Was he walking on this side of the street to consciously go against the grain – so to speak? The answer is “yes.” He was walking on this side in addition to his choice to be participating with his feminine side. Cool right? And we’re just getting warmed up so I’m going to do what’s called in the computer business, a data dump. If you miss something you can always replay back the audio to listen to any part that you didn’t get. Naturally, this dude is a healer. It would make sense if in real life he was a doctor or something. Or maybe, he’s much more than a healer. Now we already know this because most people don’t fly up into outer space with intent to take out the hot water spigot to all things dark and evil. But let’s discover the meaning of this dream in a somewhat chronological order. Obviously, the man in the dream was familiar with the house. Let’s call it a house of healing. The house being located in a middle-class neighborhood speaks volumes that the need for healing is something was exceedingly high right in the middle of the population. It’s easy to deduct if the middle of any community needed was so desperate for attention, then the poor would really need help. Clearly those participating at the top of the class of the community would not be exempt from any such emergencies or pain or suffering. If this dream and its thinking were applied right in this moment, then the pandemic of the Coronavirus would affect the middle of any class, in the same pattern. By the way, people aren’t sick, desperate and needy if they’re in balance. It can’t happen. Let’s go further. The man in the dream approached the house and instantly took his place in wanting to offer contribution to those in need. An admirable quality, but not necessarily a required role, especially if the people being brought to the house begin to be accountable for what they are creating. This isn’t to judge anyone who’s been sick, out-of-balance or inherited certain genes that would be considered weaker in nature to create whatever issue is being manifested. The truth here, is that the masses need help and there aren’t enough service people helping the people in desperate need. And it’s interesting, too, isn’t it, that this whole dream case study suggests that finding the origins of the black hole, or the center of all evil, is something that is hard to find. If you do this in reverse, isn’t it also interesting that sometimes people think that’s it’s hard to find the Light? All we’re doing is becoming very focused on the meaning of this dream. Is it true that this person was wanting to become aware of the origins of all evil? And of course, the answer is “yes.” And having done that, it’s clear that he’s going through a learning curve. We’ll call it a spiritual learning curve where those people or those entities or those angels or guides that were surrounding him were actually offering him guidance in the dream. It wasn’t perfectly clear as to all who was there, but in time there became, well, quite a grouping or a gathering where they were all aware of where this dark place was. And yet, they were all asking and even encouraging, but certainly realizing, that everything has free will choice, including this man, that they could not necessarily interrupt his free will choice, which is another clear indication of this dream. But there was encouragement for him not to destroy black hole, the origins of all evil. Again, this is the opposite of the Light. And yet I thought was extremely interesting to see the very nature of how the darkness can be consuming, and pulls you in. Like watching a campfire, only in the case of true evil, darkness, just the opposite. But equally compelling. Further, the meaning that this person got what he was looking for in terms of having this understanding, of finding something that was inherently dark and then coming back into his body, and to participate perhaps with the knowledge and understanding that this is a part of the human cycle, not just those people that were coming to that particular house, but literally everyone, again, not necessarily just one class of people; the poor, middle class or even the elite of the neighborhood. The impact of darkness and suffering can affect everyone. And this is something that’s really important. Don’t you think that we can really understand more? About this dream… We can use this dream case study to understand more about the meaning of a dream and perhaps in this case something even more. If you’re awake! Well, if we’re awake to become aware of what it is that we’re trying to connect with in our dream like state, the whole purpose of this podcast is for you to become aware of what your dreams mean. Your dreams can bring you millions of ideas. And these ideas can literally transform your life. As was the fact in Berry’s case. He transformed the life of others, which is something that’s, of course, deeply encouraged further for of all of us. There’s all kinds of spiritual depth to your dreams. And yet we’ve only been a couple minutes dissecting this one particular dream case study. It’s so important for you to get in touch with allowing yourself to dream and to determine its meaning. It’s my hope that you would find a renewed desire to really get in touch with your dreams, not just in remembering them, but to really determine the meaning to your dreams. And of course, if you need help, you know, people and resources like myself. I’m pleased to do this. I love to do this. In fact, sometimes dreams come to me so quickly that I have to actually wait for the person to tell me what their dream is so I can actually share with them what the meanings of their dreams are. And that’s something that’s very exciting for me. And of course, I hope that it’s exciting for those people that I reveal those dream meanings to. These things are really fun. You can do this within your own self. What is the meaning of your dreams? Start now in terms of being more conscious of what it is that you want to remember about your dreams and how they can impact your life. Thank you again for joining today’s podcast entitled, What’s the Meaning of My Dreams? WRITE A REVIEW It only takes a few minutes. Your comments and review truly assist others in becoming a part of our spiritual community. Write a Review now SOMETHING MORE Contact Us HereTelephone: (480) 212-1961 More Podcasts My Octopus Oracle | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 64 Hi, I'mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…" My Story When does an Octopus become a spiritual Oracle?My Octopus Teacher is a documentary with an... Conscious Reflections | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 63 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryConscious Reflection"The Moment You See Higher Self You Are Enabled" - Weston JollyThere's a lot going... 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Are you pushing love away? | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 60 Hi, I'mWestonAfter providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…"My StoryHow your NEED to be liked can push love away.How needing to be liked is the very reason you're NOT... The post What’s The Meaning of My Dreams? | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 61 appeared first on Weston Jolly - Spiritual Awareness. Expand Your Conscious..
47 minutes | a year ago
Are you pushing love away? | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 60
Hi, I’mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story How your NEED to be liked can push love away. How needing to be liked is the very reason you’re NOT loved. Are you pushing love away by trying to be a pleaser? Are you someone who is always trying to be cool? Trying to be liked can cost you the love of your life – your soul mate. Accommodating isn’t the answer, and yet so many have tried it in vain, hoping to be liked, and even more hoping to be loved. Join Sarah and I in a real life talk about creating a romantic relationship. (Whether you’re in one or you’re not) A candid view of helping yourself to create the love of your dreams by doing just one thing. Very few actually practice this simple principal. Those who do open themselves to truly be loved for who they genuinely are. Click on the above media player or read the full transcript below. (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 060 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: How your need to be liked can push away love. Weston Jolly: [00:00:07] I am Western Jolly, your host. Weston Jolly: [00:00:45] Hello, everybody and thank you again for joining us for true connections with Western Jolly, again, I have a very beautiful special guest with me this afternoon. And we’re going to talk about relationships. But before we get there, would you like to introduce yourself? Sarah Jolly: [00:01:00] Well, hello, does anyone recognize my voice? Of course they do. Speaking of relationships, it is Weston’s daughter. Weston Jolly: [00:01:09] Sarah Jolly. And certainly I thought that it would be really fun to talk about relationships in the context of romantic relationships. And of course, Valentine’s Day is coming up very soon. And sometimes there’s an emphasis that we, of course, want to get closer towards a partner and sometimes we don’t know what to do to accomplish that. So I thought we’d have a free forum. Just dialogue about relationships specific to romance. Sarah Jolly: [00:01:36] Yep. Yeah. Today we’re not having lunch. Today we’re having tea time. You and I are drinking tea. And we are going to spill the tea on relationships. Weston Jolly: [00:01:47] That sounds good. So in a relationship that you would consider romantic, do you feel that you are your self most of the time? Sarah Jolly: [00:01:56] In the one I’m in currently. Yes. Yes. OK. Was it like that before? Never. OK. Weston Jolly: [00:02:03] So what happened? This is part of our, I think when we start to look at relationships, especially romantic relationships. For I let you talk, hold on for a second. Sometimes we go into a role or an act or we present ourselves in a certain way in the idea that if we do these kinds of things even during Valentine’s Day, that if we do certain kinds of things then that deems us a good romantic partner. And you know what? It’s my observation in a way that most people are really, really drawn to another when we’re being ourselves. Sarah Jolly: [00:02:34] Yes. Yes. Always. Hey, you want me to comment on that? Oh, yeah, sure. OK. So a little background. So I’m 33 years old. Sarah Jolly: [00:02:46] I’m currently in a two year relationship with my sole partner and love of my life. But previously, I think it’s so funny that you’re talking about feeling like you need to be a certain person to be with someone. Sarah Jolly: [00:03:06] So I carried that. My dating life before this and I was a serial monogamist. So in a relationship, out of one, in the next one, out of one, so I would label myself in the past as the cool girl. And that’s how I always wanted to come across. And I thought that that’s part of what made me desirable. And even part of what made me lovable. Sarah Jolly: [00:03:34] And so when Valentine’s Day came around, I’d be like, oh, whatever, whatever. Sarah Jolly: [00:03:41] Because the guys I was dating there were like like men, men like meat, football, beer, and they’re like yuk flowers. That’s so stupid. Did you know that flowers are like two hundred dollar mark up just for Valentine’s Day? And I’m not going out to pay for a dinner on Valentine’s Day, that’s just some commercialized bullshit thing. Almost unromantic, right? So unromantic. But I’m cool girl in this relationship. Right? So I was like, oh, that’s cool. Sarah Jolly: [00:04:10] That’s totally me too. That. Yeah. How dumb. I love you every day of the week. Real talk. Valentine’s Day is one of my top three favorite holidays. I did not know that. Right? I absolutely love Valentines Day. Well, tell me why. OK. Well, I’m Pisces and emotional and creative. And I think that Valentine’s Day is so beautiful. What it says, just celebrating love. And I know that it really gets put through a funnel into like, am I with someone or am I not with someone. Yes, I want talk about that, too. Yeah. But really, that isn’t for me, what it’s about. Sarah Jolly: [00:04:50] Like, I remember getting like cards from kids in school and just feeling like it’s a really fun day where people don’t think about themselves and they think about other people. Now, I think that’s really sweet. And then in my. . . Sarah Jolly: [00:05:04] I want to say, like my late 20s, you probably because you saw these like excuse my language. Sarah Jolly: [00:05:11] Well, I shouldn’t say, I was going to say dickheads, but these like these guys that they’re just boys, OK? They’re not terrible. I have a lot of respect for. . . this is Dad. Can I call them out? Yeah. Sarah Jolly: [00:05:20] Like I have a lot of respect for my exes, but you probably have different thoughts. Clearly. Sarah Jolly: [00:05:26] I feel like I going to have to scrap this whole section and clear my name from this record, but I don’t know if. Sarah Jolly: [00:05:32] Well, I’m curious now. I don’t know if you saw the way that I felt like I got kind of ignored year after year on Valentines. Sarah Jolly: [00:05:40] Also, to be fair, though I was always in a relationship, I seemed to always be single on Valentine’s Day. And so it kind of had this buildup for me of like like I want to be that girl who gets the flowers. And you started bringing me roses every year on Valentine’s Day. And of course, you do that for Mom and you would. You started in my 20s kind of mid to late 20s. Sarah Jolly: [00:06:08] You would either bring me roses or I think one time you had them delivered. Sarah Jolly: [00:06:13] And there was always this really sweet note and. Sarah Jolly: [00:06:18] It started to paint a picture in my head of what I really wanted cause like I’m not trying to be creepy, like I want to date my dad. No, right. But like. Sarah Jolly: [00:06:27] But, you know, I do think you get that pattern from your parents. And I think the relationship that you have with your opposite sex parent plays a big role in a romantic relationship. Well, yes, it is. Sarah Jolly: [00:06:42] And you doing that allowed me to finally accept about myself that I do fricking love that stuff. I think it’s so wrong. I don’t get flowers ever. You know, it’s like a special thing. And so anyways, so here I’m coming out of the closet. I flaming love Valentine’s Day. And so that was a long way around to answer your question in myself, my relationship now. Yes, absolutely. And I love. Sarah Jolly: [00:07:13] That now that I’m finally comfortable saying, yes, I’m a girl that loves flowers, sure. And yes, I’m still low maintenance and chill girl. But yeah, I love flowers and that doesn’t make me crazy. And my partner, he’s gotten me flowers from like day one. He’ll send them for whatever reasons or sweet little nothings. Weston Jolly: [00:07:34] And by the way, as a dad, you know, in terms of observing that, it just means everything to me that someone would take the time to really see you in the same way that I would. Of course, not romantically, but the depth of our relationship and someone else seeing and valuing that too just means everything to me. And course, that’s the point of not just the flowers, but that kind of connection. Sarah Jolly: [00:07:56] That’s what I was gonna say. I don’t want it to sound shallow like I have to have flowers. Right. But for me, it is a love language and I really connect with nature. And there’s something about life, fresh flowers, that is really endearing. And also my love languages and notes and cards. So like for my birthday, my favorite thing to get is a card. And I like the flowers always come with a note. So. So yeah, it’s so much more than like someone else’s thing might be coffee and someone elses thing might be none of that, or a massage, or a movie or something. Yeah. It’s kind of like reading whatever that love language is. Sarah Jolly: [00:08:32] But if I was never open. Sarah Jolly: [00:08:36] I was so sure that I would be rejected if I was really just myself in my relationships. Weston Jolly: [00:08:44] You know, let me let me interrupt with that, because I think a lot of people are. I think there’s a lot of conditioning that sometimes people are conscious of. And I’m speaking of both sexes, enter into a relationship with a poised external self-esteem of what I should look like, or how I should how I should be successful or beautiful or even our body types at that moment. And you know what? Those things are important to the degree that they are. But it’s really about the connection that we have with one another. And I was going to say a moment ago that most of us aren’t necessarily putting forth a thought with regards to a desire of the kind of relationship that we want. Meaning that most people are just accepting whatever, quote unquote shows up. And this is part of the act. Weston Jolly: [00:09:31] Well, you know, he does give me flowers every couple years, which is very different than someone who’s extremely attentive and attentive beings being aware, being aware of you, your needs, your desires. And, you know, I’d have to share this with you as if you don’t know, but you’re a very, very romantic person. Yeah, very. So if someone didn’t connect with you, not just for Valentine’s Day, but all of the time like that, in one sense you’re missing something, now, that would be judged by Dad. But that’s not really my place. But to see you engage in that kind of space and to choose or co-create a partnership in that kind of way. Well, of course, that’s something you want to have, not just for the day, but as you said a moment ago, all of the time. Yeah. But I think the the focused attention on what we want and again, we create the kinds of relationships that we put forth as our desires. And if we’re not putting a thought towards that, then we’re coexisting. We’re getting along, but we may not be as tight or connected or romantically inclined as we want to be. And a lot of times I hear this, especially from women. There’s a great desire for romance. And it’s almost like it’s it’s your move. Meaning as the guy that, you know, you’re you’re the one that has to to make the move. I do all the romantic things in this relationship. And, you know, I’m kind of wincing into that because I know that some men may or may not exercise that as a thought, but it’s not just about one party versus the other. Sarah Jolly: [00:11:01] Meaning it’s not a conditional thing, you know, can I jump in on that? Yeah, please. Okay. And I’m gonna I’m going to cross lines here probably for a lot of people listening. But look, I’ve a very open relationship with my family. I would say that, gosh, I don’t like say for all women, but in my experience and with my girlfriends, I’ll say that, that when it comes down to I’m waiting for you to make the next move, I want you to surprise me with blah blah blah. It is the same as, and I’m sorry if this is inappropriate, but it is the same as being in bed and expecting someone to please you. But you have given them no roadmap for how to do that. Sarah Jolly: [00:11:43] It’s not that your guy doesn’t want to please you, whether it’s in bed or whether it’s romancing you. Sarah Jolly: [00:11:49] If they don’t have, like the desire could be there, you could have the desire to drive the car. Sure. But if they’re just dropped off in the middle of the desert, they’re just gonna start driving around and you’re like, well, how come you didn’t turn left? We didn’t tell them that what you want. Sarah Jolly: [00:12:04] And especially, and I do think a lot of women are trying to become someone for their partner. And so I think that’s where that angst comes in. I’m this quote, I do everything for you, right? Isn’t technically all the shit you’re really doing for them that they even want. Right. That typically means is I am not being myself for you. Right. The least you could give me back is flowers or sub in whatever your thing is. And I think that that’s where a lot of that kind of angst comes from. But in order to really get what you want, you have to know yourself. That’s why I brought up the bedroom reference, because I think everyone’s really familiar with that. But if you don’t know what’s pleasurable to yourself, how are you going to tell someone else who’s . . . you? Maybe you have a willing and eager guy or girl who’s ready to be there for you. And they go, Yeah, what do you want? Sarah Jolly: [00:12:59] Frozen? I don’t know. Sarah Jolly: [00:13:00] I don’t know because I haven’t been myself in this relationship for so long. You know what I mean? So, you know, it’s like putting a lot on someone else when you haven’t done your own work. That’s what I found for myself. And it’s true. Weston Jolly: [00:13:12] And I think you’re seeing a lot from a woman’s perspective, even personally. And I acknowledge that just. Sarah Jolly: [00:13:16] Yeah. Sorry for any unsubscribes that just happened in the last two minutes. Weston Jolly: [00:13:21] I don’t think that’s the case. Weston Jolly: [00:13:22] I think there’s a beauty in just being that open, because I think that people really do want to get close to one another. But if someone’s putting on an act and there’s an expectation outside the act like someone’s supposed to do something, but they haven’t been exposed to the idea what it is that you want, from a male perspective, how are we supposed to know? Meaning you’ve never declared that. You’ve never told me. You’ve never and I’m supposed to be, quote, intuitively understand that? In my world I kind of am. So in that sense, I have maybe an advantage, but a lot of guys don’t. And it’s not that they’re idiots as much as they need some direction. Now, the guys, too, from my perspective as a guy, need to declare what they want as well. I mean, I’ve had guys, grown men, very successful, ask me some pretty basic questions. I mean, like sixth grade, seventh grade questions in terms of what it’s like to actually be yourself in a relationship or even something as simple as what is love. And and yet they’ve had, of course, zillions of girlfriends and sexual encounters, but not necessarily something that would be really deep. And it’s like dancing to the music, but not necessarily feeling it. Meaning you can see the beat. Yeah. But they’re very awkward. And so that can be done in relationship, of course, in bed. And a lot of other places that create this distance, then something that I feel that most people, which is both sides, males and females, they really want, to really be known. You know, to draw together closely. And so, you know, as you’re doing right now, Sarah. Being that open is incredible. And of course, that is being you. Now some people find that, shall we say, difficult because they’ve never tried that within their own self. And then therefore, to do it outside of themselves, especially in a relationship, is like, oh, my God, I can’t do that. Because if I do, if I’m that nice, in terms you’ve heard this forever, spiritually naked. Weston Jolly: [00:15:14] Yeah. I knew you were gonna say. I won’t do any hand gestures in the studio, but in a state of openness, there is an exposure that we have. Weston Jolly: [00:15:24] And then the ideas, of course this is ego or shell, that Oh, she won’t like me. That if I expose myself in this kind of way, being my real self, that if she doesn’t like that, then man, I am screwed. Hundred percent. And yet there’s something so beautiful about being comfortable with yourself first. Yeah. To be able to exhibit that naturally by just being with that other party. You know, let me be in a role here for a moment. To me, some of the most beautiful intimacy in relationships is just being able to sit with somebody. Yeah, meaning without the TV, without flowers, without anybody in know your ear, just reading. I mean, just sitting on the couch. And then there’s there’s this energy, this vibe that can take place that we’re just nourishing one another, but we’re not necessarily touching or doing anything, just sitting. Right. And yet there’s something really profound about that, because there’s a spark of desire that’s being, that comes through the body that you can feel that in your connection with yourself and the other party. And it just feels like, God, was that so good. And all we did was, you know, sit in the car from here to Sedona or something, or had some sparse communication. There’s an intimate silence which is different than, I wonder what he’s thinking now. Sarah Jolly: [00:16:43] I’ve had the other kind, which is? I was with a more again, men personality, and I’m just joking. Sarah Jolly: [00:16:54] I love men. I love men. And to be honest, I love my ex’es. Sarah Jolly: [00:16:57] Yeah, but like, you know, totally different personality, right? Like I’m on on this podcast, for heaven’s sakes, talking about things very openly that a lot of people won’t even talk about with their partners. True. Let alone Dads. Yeah. And so this guy grew up with like brothers, and like we don’t talk about emotions or anything. And so I was like. Oh, just so in love with him. Sarah Jolly: [00:17:22] And we would have these silences that were so silent and it didn’t feel comfortable. You know, they say like, like you’re saying, like having those comfortable silences, like our connection is so deep we can sit in silence with each other. Yes. Yes. Even though it might sometimes feel uncomfortable to tap into that within yourself, it’s not uncomfortable in the fact of, we just have nothing to say to each other. And so we would just sit there in these long ass silences. And he, probably thought that it was totally normal, because he grew up in a family where that’s what they do. Right. And I’m like, my family validates each other through conversation. Sarah Jolly: [00:17:59] And this is very uncomfortable for me. Sarah Jolly: [00:18:02] But, you know, if you allow yourself to stay open in any situation, I think you can learn and grow from it. Sure. And in that particular one, I ended up learning about myself that I do like to be validated through communication and verbally. Sure. And so I learned about myself that you can sit and not know how someone feels about you. Sarah Jolly: [00:18:25] And I’ll let me tell you, I met six people in his family and they were all the same way. Sarah Jolly: [00:18:30] And we would just sit in silence together, it’s like watching a game or something or something like that. But, you mean six people of his family? His family. Oh, yeah. Brother’s, Mom, cousins, nephews. Like all the same? Yeah. And like, and I think it’s fine to not talk and watch TV. You know, that’s fine. Sure. But when you have it, when you only see someone once a year sitting right next to them, this is your one time to see them that year. And no one’s even talking to you. Sarah Jolly: [00:18:55] In my mind, I’d like to. They like me. Did they not like me? And it goes back to that thing of like, who should I be for them? And this really exposed that for me. And I’m so grateful for this relationship. It exposed my own internal tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick of like, how do I put on what I need to put on for you if you’re not telling me who you want me? Oh wow. Sarah Jolly: [00:19:18] And so I would challenge myself. I’d be like family day. Yes. Like with grit teeth. Here we go. And I would sit there and I’d say, no matter how uncomfortable this is, I’m gonna write my own story because just because they’re being silent, you don’t know that they don’t like you. Right. I’m the bubbly girl that the family’s always like in this hall. And that’s part of my ego and my persona that makes me feel comfortable here. And so I would challenge myself to go sit there and say, no ones gonna interact with you. And that doesn’t have to mean they don’t like you unless you decide it means that. So I’d sit there and tell myself fun things. Oh, they love you. Oh, this person thinks you’re funny. Oh, that person thinks you’re beautiful. That person has no opinion of you at all. And I’d start playing with that in my head. Sure. And and it really helped kind of heal that in me, to be honest. Weston Jolly: [00:20:07] And you’re kind of getting something I want to talk about very specifically, which is, it’s my observation. I’ll put it that way as an invitation to everybody that all of our relationships. Weston Jolly: [00:20:18] romantic, of course, and then even the relationship that we have as father and daughter and, you know, all of us have other kinds of relationships that they are absolute reflections of us. The reason sometimes these are these relationships are so tough. If I can use the term is because we don’t want to see something in this other party, my romantic partner that they are reflecting back. Now that can be hard, of course, in a can actually be the most beautiful thing in the world. If we are open to that, that that party isn’t holding bricks and glass and, you know, nails with an intention to act like that’s their whole job as maybe Mom or Dad or someone else did and or our past or even previous relationships, we have to, shall we say, re-sort that out so that we can again declare what we want and then really get used to the idea that this state of openness, I mean, just being that open energetically, emotionally, certainly verbally. As you said before, telling others, an intimate partner the roadmap in terms of you use the term love language, I think is very important. How would someone know? I mean, I know what my love language would be. And yet if my partner didn’t. It’s not my job to tell her, but I would be very interested in sharing that. Only to date, meaning to figure out how compatible we are so that it would be something that would be, shall we say, understood. And hopefully it’s not a chore. Oh, my God. This is what I have to do for Weston and terms of speaking in his language. But rather that it is something that she would enjoy to do in the same way that I would do that. Sarah Jolly: [00:21:51] And who doesn’t like talking about themselves, honestly? You know, who doesn’t like getting what they want? So when it’s difficult, it’s only difficult because you are scared of what could happen. Someone could leave me. It’s not that it’s actually difficult. Sarah Jolly: [00:22:12] Like imagine sitting in a room of people who all have the same thoughts and beliefs as you do. Sure, it usually energizes someone. I’m energized, because they get me, I’m understood. So that’s usually not the part that’s it’s not difficult to say what you want. That’s never a chore. It only becomes a chore because of all the burden feelings that can come with it. What if what if this person leaves me and then the entire, you know, stack of cards falls? Weston Jolly: [00:22:39] But I do think that there’s a lot of people that are concerned or even overtly concerned to express themselves. What I will say their true self with somebody else, because number one they’ve never practiced that, two, Weston Jolly: [00:22:54] they have never, shall we say, experimented with what could be the reaction, which is usually, this is dangerous. I mean, this isn’t safe. And why would we do that, especially with somebody close because they could hurt you the deepest. Yeah. If you look at people who go north and south in terms of splitting up or divorce, oftentimes those things become emotional craters of the deepest kind. Because someone has the intimate knowledge of what took place with that other party, and we’re somehow going to go put it on a billboard someplace and God can that be painful. And yet, you know, if that’s the nature of the relationship, we can see a lot about each party that would be willing to, you know,go advertise the whole world that this is what this party did. When we have a deep respect for ourselves, there’s not that tendency, even if we’re going north and south, it’s not, I don’t need to expose to the world what’s going on? Sarah Jolly: [00:23:48] You got something? You know, I’m just kind of laughing because as you’re saying that this has been building in my mind. What? Sarah Jolly: [00:23:53] Just to be clear, I’m saying some things in jest. And I am a very open person and I find a lot of comedy in life. But just to be fair and put this out there. Oh, boy. I have complete and utter respect for every person I’ve ever been with, including including really horrendous relationships. Yeah. Yeah. Or experiences with people. Sure. So I just want to say that, too, because I completely agree with what you’re saying. It’s really about you. Sarah Jolly: [00:24:28] And even the most horrendous, horrendous shit can be the biggest opener in your life. And I think this is probably why I’ve been drawn to relationship after relationship is, I think it’s one of the best like tools for growth. I use use that term, too. Yeah. Sarah Jolly: [00:24:50] As long as you challenge yourself to stay open, it completely breaks my heart to hear a friends or other people say, well, or even in dating. Sarah Jolly: [00:25:03] Oh, man. People were like, well, I’ve been hurt before. So I’ve got all these walls up right then. I don’t think you’re getting the point because it’s going to suck. You’re going to meet people that are different from you and you’re going to reveal yourself to them. And they are going to say, not for me. Sarah Jolly: [00:25:21] I wrote down, I read. I was like trying to find the love of my life, right. I’m like, okay, I want love so bad. And I was totally that girl. And I read somewhere that if you write down a list of all the things that you want. I’m a big fan. You’re more like, it was probably you that told me this. So I got on my iPhone and I was like, okay, what he looks like, what his personality is like, what his spirit is like. What I mean, I went on and on, and I was dating this guy that I was so infatuated with. Sarah Jolly: [00:25:55] And I thought at the time he was way out of my league, like he was so infatuated with me. And I was like, what’s happening? The universe said yes to me finally. Oh, my God, this is amazing. Sarah Jolly: [00:26:07] And I’m just like. Day by day we’re like, wow, can you believe we found each other? No. Can you? Wow, wow, wow. And so I go. Sarah Jolly: [00:26:14] I go. You’re a manifestation of this list that I made. Sarah Jolly: [00:26:20] And I was like, it’s really true. You make this list and you draw this person in life like, wow. And he goes, oh, cool. Let me see the list. Have I told you this before? Sarah Jolly: [00:26:27] No. Oh, Lord. Oh, Lord. I’m I’m I’m a big fan of. Oh, I am like on this high. Sarah Jolly: [00:26:34] Showing him this list thinking like this is it. Our babies are gonna be so beautiful. Like I’d like. Oh, I was just so over the moon. I showed him this lesson. He’s reading it quietly. And I’m starting to have that insecurity, where of silence. Sarah Jolly: [00:26:48] And I’m like, oh, things are getting a little quiet. Cricket. How are you doing over there? He goes. Sarah Jolly: [00:26:55] Wow. Sarah and I’m like, wow. I know, I know. Sarah Jolly: [00:26:58] That was really on. Right. And he kind of and I’m thinking like, you’re seeing yourself in this. And he goes, Wow, this is not me at all, Huh? Sarah Jolly: [00:27:16] And, he goes, this is not who I am. And he starts pulling things out. Then he goes, This isn’t me. This isn’t me. And I’m explaining. Well, it doesn’t have to be exactly what’s on the list. But but here’s how I see it. And this was me now trying to fit into his version of what . . . because I wanted to hold on. And I look back now. This is probably the only ex that would ever even listen to this podcast. Sarah Jolly: [00:27:46] If you’re listening and you know who you are, I want you to know things didn’t end super great. Sarah Jolly: [00:27:51] But I want you to know that that moment meant the most to me. I felt so rejected because essentially off that list, he broke up with me out of the clear blue sky. All right. Literally went from I’m so all about you. Took a trip. Came back from the trip and was like. Things aren’t working out. Bye bye. I was like, what? My heart. And he said, Sarah. I looked at what you wanted and it wasn’t me. And I’m sitting here trying to justify. Oh, but it is. But but we could work on blah, blah, blah. And now I look back on like, wow, that list. I throw it out? Fuck you list. You ruined my life. Now I like that list really did work. And you have to be willing. And I’m thankful for his honesty of not wasting my time. You bet. He, you know, looked at it, said, this isn’t me, honey. Bye-Bye, And I was like, No! But wow, what an amazing human being. So thank you if you’re listening. Sarah Jolly: [00:28:48] Thank you for what you did because you showed me that it’s okay to actually ask for what I want. And in that situation, I went crawling back and trying to change everything on my list for him. And I thank you for saying no anyways because it was not authentic what I was doing. And in retrospect, it really taught me. Sarah Jolly: [00:29:11] Yes, someone is gonna read your list one day, or know every little thing about you. And then some. Or know you like flowers on Valentine’s Day, no matter how cheesy that is, and they are going to love you for that. And so. Yeah. The list. It sucks. And it’s great. Weston Jolly: [00:29:29] No, no, no, no, no, no. Weston Jolly: [00:29:31] But this is incredible. Because when we put the list forth authentically, number one, and that this isn’t again a show and tell thing that this is something we’re trying to do. This is something we genuinely feel. Yeah, When we do that, then we create something, of course, spiritually and universally. And that’s an incredible thing. But I just point out, of course, you did something wonderful in terms of the learning curve. But, you know, you were trying, which is different than being, to be something else with regards to what it is that you declared. And this is where we get into the space of fooling ourselves. I’ll even say lying to ourselves. And so we have a guy here that’s actually honest enough to say, not me, man. And so he steps away from the list. You could have been devastating, says, fuck that list, as you said before, or we could step further into it, and said, You know what? I really, really need to be at one with this being me. So what I want to share, too, is a part of what we’re doing. That, as we said just a moment ago, that relationships are all about you. Meaning look what you learned in that relationship about you and the pattern that maybe didn’t represent I’ll call it the real you. Oh, a hundred percent. And now I’ll look at you in terms of you saying this is what I want and having more than what’s on your list, which is to me how it should be. You should be continued to be surprised by. Wow, wow. That wasn’t quote on my list. And yet this person shows up and I see shows up not and just, you know, roll call. Hey, Weston, Weston, are you’re here? Yes. No, not that kind of show up, but really being there. Right. And going beyond that, because they really care that thats not just that you like flowers. Weston Jolly: [00:31:07] What kind of flowers? Can we plant a garden of those kinds of flowers? I mean, what else can we do as your counterpart? You are partnered to participate in that kind of intimacy. And taking the time to know that, not because, you know, someone wrote it in a book or I would say it, but rather that you get in touch with their own self, then theres this move that you can feel. Sarah Jolly: [00:31:32] I couldn’t agree more. And I think that. Sarah Jolly: [00:31:36] Part of that is. Sarah Jolly: [00:31:38] Your soul is so expansive and what your mind Sarah Jolly: [00:31:45] understands of that is a mere percentage. Sarah Jolly: [00:31:50] This is my opinion, people not a p_h_d_ in the subject. Sarah Jolly: [00:31:54] This is my opinion on it, and Sarah Jolly: [00:31:57] I really think there’s something so magical about saying I’m going to stay open, and that’s what you’re saying this and then some, or this and something better. Right. Cause I can make a list of the things I know, but I’m going to make that list based off of things I’ve already seen, things I’ve already experienced. Very wise Sarah. But I have no idea the other needs of my soul. Right. And that is why I’m calling this person I’m with now, a soul mate for me, because he is bringing things into my life that I didn’t even know that I needed. And they are so fulfilling on such a deep level. And that takes two people being open. Right. You have to be open. And that’s why for me personally, going from one relationship heartbreak, the next relationship heartbreak. I mean, it was hard to not get blocked off. Sure. But I thought, well, why else am I trying to find something else then? Because. If I’m going to stay blocked off, then what’s the point anyway? Right. You know, and and so in staying open, you can get things that you would never even write down on a list. You literally don’t even know that they exist yet. Sarah Jolly: [00:33:18] And I think that that is some of the beauty of a relationship that goes so beyond like a boy and a girl, or a girl and girl, or boy and a boy, or whatever goes so far beyond the physicality of it. And I’m actually curious for you, because you’ve in a 30, what year relationship? Thirty eight, thirty eight. Wow. Okay. A thirty eight year relationship. Sarah Jolly: [00:33:50] I have I have a few questions for you. Weston Jolly: [00:33:52] If you’re open before we get to that, for half a second, I think it’s worthy of sharing that the intimacy, the real intimacy comes in, number one, being open as you described, by being open. Being open with your true self, not an artificial state of openness and then receiving your compliment in the form of seeing what comes before you through this person’s free will to do so, not through an obligatory stance or having to do something. And then the not cultivates this excitement to why we would want to date. So I’ll comment about that, that I wasn’t sure that I could be married in tenure based upon not necessarily finding that kind of connection way back when. Weston Jolly: [00:34:38] And when I met someone who, you know, captivated me in so many different areas. It kept getting bigger and bigger, bigger. And that’s still true today. There’s still things that I’m finding about her that I did know. And I think of that as dating, even though we’ve known one another for a couple days. But the relationship isn’t based upon time. And even to some degree, I’m not a big fan of making an announcement because people put so much weight on the tenured relationship as if they’re doing it right versus someone who’s only been together for three days. So that the real point is what I want to share is that, the connection is something that you mentioned, and you said it so beautifully and I just wanted to underscored it. That the soul does know. And if we give the soul an opportunity to get in touch, which means that you have to be open enough to do that with yourself first, and then you invite this opportunity. And if it’s not showing up, we do have to be brave enough like this one boyfriend would be, that we jump out, hey, I’m not being me or I’m not being connected with or I’m not continuing to be refreshed or expanded in this relationship. Weston Jolly: [00:35:46] And if that’s the real truth, I know it’s hard to say that within our own self, let alone externally to, you know, to whoever our partner might be. But there’s something really magical about that. And it’s not about the other party, is it? Again, as much as it is self. And so when we we allow those things to come out of our voice, sometimes there’s is the mind says that’s it, that’s in the relationship, you know. And a lot of times it isn’t, meaning this is another opportunity for growth and expansion. And it’s not trying to stay together as much as we get, shall we say, ourselves out of the way to continue to expand, which is the whole point. Right? To be even more ourselves in intimate relationship. I’m kind of looking at the time and wondering if we might want to kind of circle around a couple of closing questions that you may have or thoughts. Yeah. Go ahead. Weston Jolly: [00:36:30] Anything. Okay. Sarah Jolly: [00:36:31] I’m wondering because I’m coming from the standpoint of several relationships, but short. Right? Sarah Jolly: [00:36:39] And you are coming from a different standpoint with one person. And I am wondering when you’re talking about being open like that, have you found that you just have to do it essentially one time in the beginning, or are you constantly having to unpeel yourself with this person over time? Weston Jolly: [00:36:55] In my personal experience, it’s been an evolution, at times of revolution, but it’s been an evolution of getting comfortable. Certainly safety is involved, even when you’re quote-unquote acknowledging the relationship. You can still be together for five and 10 years and finally, just letting go or sharing something that maybe you’ve never shared with anybody before. Yeah. And those are. Or, maybe you didn’t even know. Weston Jolly: [00:37:21] No, I didn’t know. Or maybe she always knew and I didn’t know. Or I mean, like about yourself. No, I know. And there’s something really cool about that. It’s scary as hell. And you can cry and, you know, think that maybe this is the end of the end. And yet there’s, in that openness, there’s again, a form of intimacy. Now, if it’s genuine, there’s a desire to connect. And, you know, we kind of walk around this, but there’s an energy, a soul’s energy, certainly a sexual energy that’s compelling. It’s not that we’re trying to do something with one another as much as theres this continued attraction that we have. Even when we’re distancing ourselves with becoming aware of things that we don’t like within ourselves and pointing at the other person saying, I don’t like this about you when it’s so much easier. Weston Jolly: [00:38:06] It is. You change first. Or when you do that, then I’ll do that, you know. Right. And it’s like, well, that’s been my experience, never really worked out. Weston Jolly: [00:38:14] But when we change ourselves, even if the thought is that our partner won’t come along with us. When we go to open ourselves, then there’s this opportunity for them, too, shall we say, their turn, their move. Now, they don’t have to do that. But if they do, it’s a wonderful evolvement of like a teeter totter going up and down. But then back and forth, back and forth, basically reflecting one another in the highest degrees possible. Now, sometimes these intimate relationships come together, which is great, and sometimes they come to a point of, okay. We’ve done this time together and I think we’re good now. And right. And it’s not like we’re somehow going in different directions. And there’s a real love and appreciating all that. But I think the intimacy comes in being ourselves, knowing that we don’t know what we want, oftentimes. So when we put our list together being open enough to be expanded to what takes place and of course you’ve got to know that even if we’re preparing to go in relationship, the more that we’re working on ourselves, it’s not about perfection, but literally giving yourself permission to say this is really who I am. Work in progress. Or maybe. Right, maybe a neophyte in this particular area. But there’s a beauty in that kind of intimacy, especially, well, from both parties. There’s a man to a woman and a woman to a man. Sarah Jolly: [00:39:34] And I think this can really be true in friendships as well. This can also be true in family. I think anytime that you challenge yourself to open your heart a little bit more. I think you deepen those relationships and your entire life becomes, for a lack of any other word, more lovely. You have more love in it and more love just attracts more love. So whether you’re in a relationship now and you’re expanding there’s always room to expand with. You’re not in one with a partner, who cares? You can you can be opening and expanding that love with the people who are in your life. That’s so beautiful. I just think that’s so beautiful. Sarah Jolly: [00:40:23] This is why I’m so obsessed with love and and with Valentines Day. Weston Jolly: [00:40:30] But, you know, I think you’re on to something because even people who are in between relationships or are still wanting to cultivate that special somebody, you know, the soulmate kind of connection, that state of openness is something that comes from within, and we can be conscious about it. In my opinion, the more conscious that we’ve become, the greater that opportunity that you’re light, you know, brings forth . . . Sarah Jolly: [00:40:51] Go deeper. Yes. Yeah. All more in the deep end, and go deeper. Weston Jolly: [00:40:54] You know, it’s funny because sometimes, have you ever had a day where you just just feel like everything is perfect? I think going to the gym and my I’ve got all the chemicals from the gym. And I just I was great going in, and it was a great workout. And I come out, and I’m smiling. I’m beaming and everything is perfect. The bank teller, you know, my car, the gas station, I’m having that day today. Sarah Jolly: [00:41:14] I am. I’m having that day today. Weston Jolly: [00:41:15] And yet when we’re creating that because we’re that open. And then, of course, what comes back to us is that kind of connection. And when we talked about romantic connection. Exactly, that kind of connection. Now see. that’s not putting on an act. That’s really being your true self because you’re that open to do so. And of course, if we, shall we say practice, or allow that to be consistent, it’s like, wow, that’s the magic. Sarah Jolly: [00:41:41] You know what I would absolutely say? Wow. Because I used to only think those days were on special days or it was like really all the magical things happen. Like, I go to the car wash and once in a while, someone there will turn to me and be like, I’m going to give you a free detail today. That has happened before. Wow. And then you hit up like my iced tea spot and there’s no line, jackpot. And then, you know, and just boom, boom, boom, things fall into place. And I used to see those as the Wow days. This is a whole nother episode. But I’m recovering from very serious ongoing health issues. And I’ve been learning that the days where you don’t think everything is going for you are just as Wow. And that’s that should be our next tea talk, to be honest. Weston Jolly: [00:42:27] Let’s do that. Because you can, would you mind? Can I invite you back again? Oh, yeah. Sarah Jolly: [00:42:32] Because, you know, it just makes you like when you learn that you can have wow all the time. And that really, I mean I’m just painting on that jelly on the bread. But that goes right back to your relationships. You just keep working them. And working is the same as your life. You’re no different from your relationship. What you do in your relationship. They’re the same. So you just keep reworking, reworking, going deeper, deeper, probably sounding like a broken record. Weston Jolly: [00:42:57] No, no, no, no. In fact, I’m thinking. . . I love this topic. Weston Jolly: [00:43:00] The whole topic, the whole family, of course, as you know, we’ve been refocusing or putting a lot of dedicated attention on being present. And that’s something that’s in my Magic Of Now booklet. That’s all free for anybody that goes to the website. Just get it, Magic of Now, but in that choice to be present, we create everything. Yeah. So in our relationships, of course, we bring historically, as you said repeatedly, a lot of stuff from the past. Moms and Dads, previous relationships, people, teachers, et cetera. And you know what? We really want to be aware of that. Sarah Jolly: [00:43:33] Okay. I’m gonna ask you a question. This is open ended. Wes doesn’t know I’m going to ask him this. Wes is new to some social media accounts. He is. Well, he’s been on Facebook for a while. He’s brand new to Instagram. Sarah Jolly: [00:43:52] And man, is that tough. I know. You’re doing great. I don’t know. Okay. But it’s kind of fun. But it’s all about connection, right? Sarah Jolly: [00:44:00] That’s a great, easy way to connect. And I know that’s the reason why you’re on there. And yeah connection is your whole entire thing. It is. So I’m wondering if, you can say no if you want, but I’m wondering to celebrate that and Valentine’s Day in this podcast, would you be willing to post in a story that’s something that Wes just learned about this week. What a story is. To post in your story, a ask me anything about relationships and you can answer however many you want. But it could be really helpful to anyone listening or anyone who wants . . . I mean, it is kind of a short format, but you could write a few answers for, you know, whoever comes in or like five or ten or whoever you think would be most helpful. Weston Jolly: [00:44:49] I think they’ll be incredible. In fact, I will make. That could be awesome. Excellent. I’ll make an absolute commitment to that. So anyone who wants to ask a question ask me anything, which is, of course, in the front of the website as it is now. But if you go to Instagram or even Facebook, Twitter, too, and put forth a question, I will address it. In fact, I’m going to put that in the week of February 14th. I’m not sure what that week is. Sarah Jolly: [00:45:14] I will show you how to post that on your story. I’ll need help there. That’s great. Sarah Jolly: [00:45:18] Then you can answer that in your story and it can be, one a great place of community, and I know I always like hearing about what’s going on in other people’s relationships. I always love hearing questions. It always helps me go deeper. Sure. So that’s awesome that you’re going to do that. Weston Jolly: [00:45:34] Well, and again, I just wanted to share with everybody how grateful I am for you, because I feel very excited to be able to have this honor to share with you. And of course, I do with you, too, Sarah, to be in this place with me and to share with others. But it’s incredible opportunity when we are open enough to share. So I think putting forth our questions in that kind of format I think is phenomenal. So please do if you want to. Sarah Jolly: [00:45:59] Thank you for having me back. Weston Jolly: [00:46:00] Oh, you’re welcome. We can do this again, right? Sarah Jolly: [00:46:03] Yeah. Good. Tea time continues. Weston Jolly: [00:46:06] Thanks. Lunch for Sarah, but we are past lunchtime time today. Weston Jolly: [00:46:10] Thank you, everybody, for joining us. And we look forward to talking with you very soon. WRITE A REVIEW It only takes a few minutes. Your comments and review truly assist others in becoming a part of our spiritual community. Write a Review now SOMETHING MORE Contact Us HereTelephone: (480) 212-1961 More Podcasts My Octopus Oracle | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 64 Hi, I'mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…" My Story When does an Octopus become a spiritual Oracle?My Octopus Teacher is a documentary with an... 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66 minutes | a year ago
Body & Soul (2) | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 59
Hi, I’mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story Body & Soul (part 2) Connecting with your body is a means to your SOUL. How is your body affected by emotions? Is there a correlation between what you think and how you feel? Have you experienced empathy for another only to be confused of whose energy you’re feeling? Join us as we have the opportunity to listen to the wisdom of a teacher of metaphysics, Pam Field of Inner Balance, who also teaches anatomy while being a registered nurse and massage therapist. Recently a woman asked me, “Do you ever feel that your body is betraying you?” It’s actually a great question. It’s unfortunate that any of us would have to face body issues in a dramatic fashion, such as illness. It’s a newer trend that we can become aware that we do not need to be reliant on external means of determining if we are healthy or not. To do this, it requires that we become truly self aware of our bodies, but most certainly what our soul is trying to communicate using our emotions. Loving your body is relevant to your spiritual growth and development. (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 059 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: Body and Soul (Part 2) Weston: [00:00:44] Thank you, everybody, for joining me today. I have a very special guest and actually a beautiful friend of our family. How many years has it been? Pam: …like eight or ten, at least -right? Weston Jolly: [00:00:57] And I wanted to bring Pam to the podcast to talk about body and soul, because she has a lot of expertise in this area. Before we get to that, Pam, why don’t you tell us what you do? Weston Jolly: [00:01:10] Well, I am a nurse, massage therapist, and I’ve been doing this for 35 years, which I developed this approach to massage and body work. And holistic is interesting because holistic used to be mind, body and spirit. Right. But I’m kind of going more. The newest trend is multidimensional because it’s a physical, mental, emotional, spiritual. But spiritual goes into intuition. It goes up to divine mind. It goes into so many other dimensions that each person has a body and a mind in each of those dimensions. And so the ideas how to use the physical body to have access to all of those other minds and actually have some language because they don’t share the same language. Weston Jolly: [00:02:13] And people know that that’s extremely fascinating and you’re already into it. So the the whole reason for this podcast is to bring up one to a tighter awareness or a greater awareness to understand how our soul or our emotions and our body all literally integrate. Now, obviously, by the number of years that you’ve been doing this, one could say that you’re a front runner, meaning that you actually, as you described, innovated something that was brand new. Is that correct? Right. So can I ask what what inspired that? Pam: [00:02:45] Well, since I was a nurse then I had children and I didn’t want to go back into the field of nursing. The way it was because I wanted to actually reach people in the allopathic tends to be wishes. Lyrical medical field tends to have very strict rules and stuff. And so and I always like to massage as a child. And I did massage on people. And so I thought then I saw this other nurse was 70 years old and still massaging of that. That’s what I wanted, really. And so that’s what I went about doing. Now, there is, you know, many times it’s 35 years. Massage has not been in any. There was at that time. There’s only two schools in the whole nation. Right. Massage. And so it wasn’t. And it had a wonky, retie reputation. So, I mean, the industry or the industry, it was associated with other kinds of massage. Right. Right. Right. So but I wanted it to go into more health and prevention because allopathic isn’t prevention waste wasthere sick and then that fixes you. So I was more interested in keeping people healthy. So there big three paradigm shifts in medicine. One was, were you the doctor came to you horse and buggy. The second one came, you go to the doctor and they take care of you and they just do stuff to you. And you just trust that there’s a third paradigm shift that has happened and nobody really knows it. Is it. Nobody’s taking care of you. You’re in charge of you. And nobody has trained you to take care of yourself. Weston Jolly: [00:04:30] Man, we’re in a right place because this is exactly what I want to talk about, because I think a lot of people are struggling, trying to understand what their body is, quote, telling them. And they are kind of aware. I mean, there’s some more and it’s going on, but not necessarily the kind that perhaps you and I and others are. Well, we’re looking for we’re helping others to create that awareness. But I thought this that even you, Pam, talking about how you came to know this. I mean, obviously, this is all in onceand self-taught to the point that you’re actually teaching others. And we should talk about that because you’re you’re a teacher, too, right. Weston Jolly: [00:05:06] And in one of those schools that you mentioned that are teach massage to the nation, you actually teach there. Right. So it’s an important I think that Pam has interestingly enough. But I will call a medical background teaching anatomy and other kinds of very normal subjects. And then talk to us a little bit about myofascial energy. Pam: [00:05:31] What is this energetic massage? Thank you. There’s been different people, especially physical therapist with my myofascial release. Mine. Mine is actually I’d advanced it a little bit more as more connective tissue. I discovered that different techniques of massage were only different parts, unlike my own therapies. Muscle. Swedish tends to be circulatory. So I realize it when you touch the body, you work on different layers and different layers of skin, superficial fascia, fashion, myofascial joint capsule, all of those are have the quality of connective tissue and connective tissue. Is something else stuck if it’s injured? OK. And so what happens is the energy part was I have a theory of energy that we’re all energy switch, which means when we’re just thicker energy in the physical, the thicker we get more done to me. And but everything all those other dimensions are just different frequencies of energy. OK. So the idea that each of those layers of the body have a different frequency to which means would take a different approach to move it in anything that an energetic gets thicker or slower or more likely in the physical will cause a disease or discomfort. OK. So the idea of energy release is our energy movement is life. If you have if anything, the energy that’s moving means life. When things stop, then it’s not alive. And so that’s even even in rocks have a slight movement. So their move, they have energy and they move or they actually stick together and stay as an energetic thing when they crumble into ash and or dirt. Then we’ve, Lou, lost some connection or attraction. So even the whole theory, quantum physics, physics, physics of energy is that I wanted to promote life, which is energy. So it’s easier to teach people about how each of these different things can cause if it gets stuck and how we can keep it moving. Weston Jolly: [00:07:57] We’ll talk to me about that. I have an inside track to that top. Talk to us more about how you help the people that you help to create awareness that maybe something stuck to begin with and how to begin to move on moving again. Specific to the physical levels which you talked about and are there spiritual levels or frequencies, too, that you are tapping into or helping others in terms of their clearing? Pam: [00:08:24] So I started massaging people to make them feel good. Good. So then I found out somewhere on the 70s and 80s they had you know, these are where things start opening up in our culture is the mind body. So I thought, oh, how you think and feel can cause problems in your physical. So I started teaching mind body stuff. And that was, you know, how your emotions can get stuck and how you think, you know, you have this thought form that goes through an anxiety and worry and fear starts doing stuff. Then I found out. Wow. What you believe affects how you think and feel. So I said, wow, I’ll have to do is help people change their belief system. Weston Jolly: [00:09:11] How did that work? Pam: [00:09:12] I went back to massaging people and I can feel good because I still teach just to increase awareness that how you think and feel and what you believe actually conflicts physicality. Sure. And so and then there come and help a path that even M.D. or coming to the realization, some of them, not all of them, that how you think and feel can and believe can cause your body like auto immune diseases. They’re starting to see that if you don’t feel really good about yourself for a long period of time, you actually can start attacking your self. Your body gives up and it says, no, that’s it. We’re gonna. And it starts collapsing into it. So the idea is how to get people to release. Weston Jolly: [00:09:57] I recently published a podcast that was about the body and how we actually hold sometimes our family secrets in the body and we don’t know it. And we’re holding onto it like we should because this is what it takes to be, you know, a dollar in terms of my last name. And we hold onto it and then we walk into something like you and you lovingly and politely and tenderly, said the Gino, when you’ll bring that to a state of awareness. But what would you say about that as a thought? Pam: [00:10:29] Well, yes, I was. I tell some females that we actually have …. It doesn’t mean that it happens to you. We carry female trauma. Sure. In all, you know, so. As a culture where enculturated in families in society, all of those we carry with us in it can become things that we attack ourselves for or get stuck in us. So the idea is freedom. We want to have give people freedom to control their own life. Right. And if they can possibly figure out that they’ve got the mos, their stuff wrapped around the axle and they can undo their own trauma and address that and understand it as a learning and growth tool as opposed to just saying, oh, this thing happened to me or my family had this happen is if you can embrace it and accept it and say, well, yeah, I learned a lot from that. Right. And I’m willing to let go of some of the trauma they actually have done. Trauma psychology the last 20 years. It’s the newest thing with dorsal vagus nerve and freeze and post-traumatic stress disorder and all of that because the medicine didn’t work for them. They actually needed dive in to what made the stress so stressful and says my job is in about stress reduction solutions. Pam: [00:12:03] The idea was stress was one of the things. Why did the stress reduction. And I learned from a book I just recently read where when the body says no. And this is the auto immune disease. Is that stress? The name stress was not there before 1970. Really. It was named by Hans Salay. And he developed a whole theory about stress response. And the stress was like in machine or, you know, buildings in mechanical stress. Sure. But there was an a stress that your body was stressful until that time where somebody named it and said, by the way, your autonomic nervous system, it was fight or flight, not stress response. Right. He renamed dad or kind of said that. And then they started seeing that people with certain personality traits, type A personality would have more heart condition, you know. So that’s how they started looking at stress as a problem. Now then it got to 75 to 80 percent of all diseases have a stress component either causing it or having it after what the disease causes stress. And then on top of that, whatever stress does to you, it can affect the other organs you have. Weston Jolly: [00:13:22] So which you’ve said basically is that it used to be that we had this generic word, stress, kind of a catch all phrase. And it sounds like we’re becoming more aware, even quantitatively, to be able to dial down to where these stresses are being held within the body. Right. And how it’s affecting us. And you said a moment ago that this has anything to do with what we think and need more believe. Pam: [00:13:46] Everybody’s individually wrapped. So some people can have a death in the family and have it lodged. Durai, this one woman, how her husband died and she was they owned a zenith, which is a TV. A long time ago first. And they had a shop. And she when he died, he she didn’t really grieve him until she sold the shop 20 years later. And then she really had a problem. And that she had moved her grief in to it, moved it. Pam: [00:14:24] And then she was still back row and she had to do it. And that when I was a young child, because seeing is like 40, 50 years ago, that I kind of go like, wow, that was weird. How does she is so upset? I mean, she had you know, so that was and this is just building on. Pam: [00:14:47] All the people are starting to come to a critical mass. Things happen and people start looking and going like all. Now we have a mind body theory, but we have some tendencies, you know, just for like functionality, like we even say it. Somebody is a pain in the neck, in the pain. Pam: [00:15:06] But for all of those are areas that would be anger. So neck, well, neck and which is jaw, which is we the three things that you do with anger, which is tell somebody off, hit them or kick them or illegal assault and slander. So usually people jam that and say, how are you? I’m fine. I’m just a. For they flinch, you know, like, you know, somebody says something. So we end up with more and more tension in that area, which pushes depression and blood vessels and nerves. And that causes ache in the garlic white. Sake. Why does this ache and so they what’s happening in your life? When did this start? And if I can look at that, get them to say, you know, well, it’s you. If they can give me like, well, right after such and such things, I don’t know. But was wait for the. But did they go. They know. They know as if this isn’t the accident and then they have caught. Eye and you can tell the building of story. Sure. My listening. They need to hear. They need to say it. And they need it. Then I kind of point out like, you know you just said this, right? Because a lot of times talk therapy is it allows people to actually listen to themselves. And then they change and they know that’s not what I meant. And then they change. And so that’s how they clearer through it’s talk therapy. Pam: [00:16:37] So this is the same idea. I don’t. I’m not a psychogy counselor, but it happens to be similar. Some people say, well, I like this. I get a massage and then I get to talk. Why would I bother me? And I like. But as I use an education, more self education for the person to the person heals themselves. And so I’m just a facilitator of that. Weston Jolly: [00:17:00] But this is the new paradigm shift or that we’re just preaching that she said a moment ago that we’re becoming, shall we say, accountable for this. That’s right. Pam: [00:17:09] But people don’t know and nobody really knows. And it’s kind of like Larry Dossey is the one that said he’s an M.D. and said that there’s these paradigm shifts, but it’s kind of like what’s happened. For example, we used to have a doctor take care of us and they were okay with that and they’re fine as long as I could do anything, you know. But when we start suing them, they go, I don’t wanna be in charge. Insurance companies won’t let them do what they want to do to completely rule out things. And so they go on and take care of you. And the insurance company doesn’t want you to take share. Then is kind of put it back on to the person to take control. But nobody is told. You always taught. Even medicine doesn’t teach you to go. Pam: [00:17:55] So the problem with that is that in order to you have to have some in-between person to actually say, yes, you’re in charge. I can prove that it’s changed. If you have a have a commercial that asks you to ask your doctor if you need an anti-psychotic medicine on top of my antidepressants. Pam: [00:18:23] You would hope the doctor would know if you need an anti-psychotic medicine, right. Without you asking, because how do you know if you’re crazy? So this is where and this is you can just look at our own commercials like they like it’s metal sort of. It gives you projectile diarrhea. Oh, yeah. I want that right. I ask for that. So the idea is you’re in charge and the doctors will say, well, this is what’s wrong with you and this is all we can do about what you want to do. You know, what do you mean what do you want to do so far? Weston Jolly: [00:18:55] But this is something I think a lot of people have a difficulty with. Even in the physical realm, because we go to a doctor trying to explain what are a quote unquote issue is most of the time, I’m not trying to be disrespectful of the whole industry, but a lot of times you’re not necessarily listening or listening to pieces and parts. Pam: [00:19:11] You’re supposed to see six people in an hour for the insurance companies to accept them while they have five minutes to make a determination to turn. Weston Jolly: [00:19:20] So even in coming to you, you know, I may or may not be conscious of something I’m dealing with. So by what means do you become aware so that you can help me to become more? Pam: [00:19:31] Well, I was thinking about this. What brought me to this area? And it’s because I feel when other people feel so, I’m in an empathic person. Weston Jolly: [00:19:44] The least so. Pam: [00:19:46] And I had throughout all of my life had this weirdness that I could tell things. Weston Jolly: [00:19:53] Can we go there a minute? Can you share with us? Because you truly are empathic and a lot of people listening are as well. And a lot of people have really, really struggled with that. That’s something that you’ve struggled with in terms of growing up. Pam: [00:20:06] Yeah. Manoa, my mom used to say. You’re too you’re too sensitive. Like, well, I’m fine. Pam: [00:20:19] Why didn’t say that? Because that would be sassy. Pam: [00:20:21] So that’s unless it’s an energy to those words. All right. It’s you literally feeling and energy. Pam: [00:20:28] And I can feel what other people feel. Right. So I did figure out and then when I’ve read all kinds of books on empathy, late or empathic lately, you know, last 10 years or it’s got clearer. Clear and there’s some really good people that teach in Path’s how to how to handle that kind of function and how to. Yeah. Otherwise you go like. Right. Right. Which is one of the reasons why it’s it’s harder to teach this. It’s gotta be it’s almost a gift. And so the people that are gifted have to really go and do this work as opposed to trying to teach people who are not in path make sure how to do it because they don’t how they look at you like. Well. Weston Jolly: [00:21:11] Well, that makes sense. And I think that’s that’s fair. That that there’s a certain truth, a skill set before someone would come to you from a student perspective. And I know that you do teach in that way very strongly to help people become aware and oftentimes not just through physical touch. Pam: [00:21:27] Like, can you feel this? And the student is actually touching that and they’re still not necessarily feeling feeling beginning to see the whole message. And you’re really helping them to do that. And of course, I’m doing that for from maybe a little bit of a different angle, but pretty much the same kind of thing. And I have a great deal of empathy. And I had a real challenge with my own self and being male to to try and incorporate that. Now, I’m not saying that it’s harder for a male at some point, but the the real connected part to becoming aware that our empathy isn’t something of a liability. I think a lot of people get stuck with that and they think that they have to take on all these things as society and it becomes a burden and becomes heavy. And this is the whole point. We don’t need to be limited or constrained. And I know that your your business is booked up, which is wonderful. But at the same time, it’s it’s cool that other people become aware of how to take, shall we say, awareness, turn out until accountability and then choose a creative plan so that they can use these gifts, as you described it, as a means to take them happily forward. Pam: [00:22:30] Well, I had my my Reiki master teacher in Kansas City. He says there’s people that can do different. Can read different things. There’s people that can read cosmically, you know, like the different seasons, the moons, the, you know, cosmic astrology kind of stuff. There are people that can read the earth, you know, like there’s going to be an earthquake. Some people can do it one on one can work one on one. And some people can work in groups. He says you can do all of this as what good is it? Pam: [00:23:07] What good is it? I don’t know what to do with it. If I can tell it is a earthquake. Who do I tell? Right. I don’t know where it is. So you actually have to train yourself to know what you’re you know, first of all, know that you’re picking something up. I feel weird. What is that? Is it something I can do something about? You know, I can’t call California, say watch out for the earthquake. Weston Jolly: [00:23:33] Does this happen to you in different parts of your geographic body? Meaning that the whole body at large? Or is it pieces of pick? Pam: [00:23:40] You know, sometimes you can get a stomach ache or something. I had one gal I went was going on at her house at that time and I had a really bad stomach. And I don’t usually didn’t have the stomach. It sounds right. So there and sheltering the massage, I go like, do you a stomach issue? Yes. Really? And so we finished. I didn’t have to make it. She didn’t have a stomach. I said, I don’t want to do this. Whoever I’m talking to, my own self is like, I don’t want to live that kind of physicality, empathy, because there’s different kinds of empathy, physical empathy, emotional empathy, mental empathy, spiritual empathy. So it’s even in that category is like no physical. I don’t wanna do that. [00:24:27] It’s interesting for myself. I literally have all four of those parts connected. I talked about actually, sir, that are going to be with me. And she asked me very clearly, what do I do if I pick up on something that isn’t mine and out of my clairsentience? And I spend quite a bit time consciously making sure that I get clear so I can be balanced for myself. And sometimes it can take a little bit of work to get myself clear because I’m not sure was paying attention. Most of the time I am. But it happens and and it’s not a liability. It must be what I want to drop-down as it isn’t. It’s it’s really a series of guests and it’s beautiful to have them. And sometimes as admin, none of us understands that the people that do things is kind of neat. And that’s that’s nice. But I know that you, Pam, have not just a empathetic gift or two, but rather many. But if you feel something from someone else, what do you do? Is that a message that you convey or is that something that you allow within your body or is something that you said a moment or that you don’t allow? Pam: [00:25:31] Well, for me, I see. Is it mine or is it. You’re right. So I kind of own my mental body. I go everybody behind the door and that’s my stuff. Get behind the door. We’ll talk about it later. Everybody, I have a belief systems in this or the belief system that who I am with is most important at this moment where we’re there. So I clear me out so that I can actually feel if there is something information. The problem is, is sometimes I get information like like. Pam: [00:26:05] I might not be. I have to see where they are and their belief system and whether they would accept me saying, you know, have you seen a doctor lately or you know, or how have you? Pam: [00:26:16] Do you know that this is here? There’s some kind of blockage here. First of all, they would accept that I do that. Right. So that’s where sometimes I allow you know, I kind of like sort that somewhere, too, like I call it triaging where I actually treat as a body. Pam: [00:26:32] And then I will also talk to the person’s higher self to ensure that I have permission to share something that I know that I want to shock anybody, but I want to project that something’s wrong with someone that’s on my place, probably more than yours. Weston Jolly: [00:26:46] But if someone’s wanting to become aware and how to take that awareness into a state of balance. Well, I’m all about that as you are. Pam: [00:26:54] Yeah, well that because I’ve had some students that I would say stuff and they got mad at me because they don’t tell me I have. Pam: [00:27:03] I don’t that I going you will. I was hoping that, you know, because. And or they come back two years later. You know, you were saying I had that. It’s like, yeah. Okay. Yes. Okay. I reached out. You I have to be careful of students because I don’t want to give them something earlier. Right. Where I kind of wanted to like prevent cause if, you know, bringing to awareness, some things might actually prevent them from having stuff. And that’s where the desire to. Say it in such a way that is not theirs, not threatening. Is there something they can control and they can work on and let go and more as an observer? Weston Jolly: [00:27:54] Right. Right. Yeah. So we’re not injecting, quote, our belief system, right. Somebody but rather just observing that there’s a possibility or sometimes that presented it as an option. So it doesn’t sound like I’m telling somebody what to do. Right. Or other saying that, bad or not. Yeah. I think giving consideration to this and then when that opens up further further permission than I can. Sure. Pretty. Exactly. So wants that information. Yeah. It’s it’s kind of exciting. Do you do find, Pam, that there’s patterns today in terms of people’s bodies, meaning they’re different trackers that we know that you’re dealing with more often than others? Sacral versus hard versus crown? Or is it just literally a smorgasbord? Pam: [00:28:42] It’s always individually wrapped. As I say, we do have or we’re taking your head because anything is a culture where a lot of people are highly emotional about things that we’re starting to see. I’m starting to see people very interestingly hit with their physicality because of their emotional body. Weston Jolly: [00:29:07] Do you think that today people are more sensitive than they were three years ago? Meaning is there an increased sensitivity as a whole? Pam: [00:29:15] I think we are. A lot of literary satirical literature as they’re going through a shift during the first of all, we have to raise or vibration to do this shift. And I didn’t know that we actually had a lower I have to do a shift, too. So that’s gone about be a bouncy ride if you’re going to. So that’s the same thing as going from mind body 7, 30, 50 years ago or 40 years ago is that it keeps new information keeps coming up and it happens to be more or more fun because it accepts some of the information is oft off the wall for normal people. You know, you start talking about weird stuff, then paranormal stuff or science fiction. I used to I used to say it is not science fiction, it’s science future facts, because our funds are just like, you know, Star Trek. Pam: [00:30:11] I’m waiting for the transporter. That’s just me. But the I. And I’d like that tricorder. That’s what I really. And so we kind of I kind of do the tricorder thing. But the thing about empath versus psychic here is, is that you get a clear like download like that. An empath is a gradually gets to it’s a role. Weston Jolly: [00:30:34] Interesting. Pam: [00:30:37] Now, I didn’t categorize that way because I actually do get that back. I got a hit so I can tell you the middle of the dartboard to the sentence and to the age that the person had the event without them having to tell me. But to be honest, I would try to work with everybody so that they will collaborate with papers on me projecting upon them. But that has tremendous value because if good to remember that. But if someone does remember from zero to 13 because of Exadata. Yes, then I will show it’s a pride and put up some mileposts to say, does this something that you recall? And that’s tremendously helpful. But then again, back to the connection to the body. A lot of people really aren’t aware of what’s going on. And I’ve made this analogy and I think you can appreciate it, that most people aren’t having awareness within their body before they have a meal. They’re not aware of how they’re feeling, what they eat. And we’ll go 30 minutes after an hour after the meal. They’re still not aware beyond, you know, I thought McDonald’s was something I wanted to have. I hate McDonald’s and maybe I don’t feel as good as I could, but I feel more energy than I did before. So that was good enough. And I’m not saying that, you know, devaluing that particular food group, but rather honoring that we we have the capacity to do a lot better than them by just putting focus attention there. Pam: [00:31:58] They have a new word. See, they’ve been doing a lot of work on this. It’s called contraception, which means the ability to go within your body and feel things within your body and understand things. And so they now and trauma psychology are going into the idea that you can actually feel things in your body and you can feel energy flows in your body. You can feel the traumas and just opening up that idea. Susan’s ideas and awareness, a lot of people go like, oh, oh, so what that could be. You know, I had that weird in. And so don’t be silly. I had this feeling when you you had why one person that I have a headache. I don’t think it’s. You know, it’s like, yeah. So the same thing is like when you do that, it it it makes my left foot itch like, OK. Now we get we have some pathways that are part of the energy flow of stuff. And so that’s. Weston Jolly: [00:32:56] So can you actually feel energy as it is supposed to go through a given body or body part? Pam: [00:33:02] Is that something? Well, I am science based, too, right? The fact that energy flows like a physical. So if people are colder and hotter in spots. Right. Exactly right. Something’s not flowing. Right. Usually it’s circulatory, but it could be lymphatic. Makes people more cooler cause they’ve got more water. Pam: [00:33:21] Sure. That’s colder. Right. So then if I can get that to move. The thing is, is in energy work. I’m at Reiki master. So it tends to be more with the Entrekin organs. OK. So it tends to be more magnetic, which is water ish. So if your hands heat up and and cool down, you’re running magnetic energy. If you if it’s buzzi and electrical is electrical. So your skeletal system, your nervous system, your fossile system runs electrical. And so it helps if you can know when you’re run, if you well, you don’t need to know. You just have to know that your hands doing something like, why is your hands hot? Must be some clearing of magnetic and magnetic energy, which would be water. Sure. So then if it’s buzzi, you know it’s sharp then. Right. We’re doing electrical or skeletal or joint. So being aware of that doesn’t assume you mean. Well it is. If you’re more aware of it, you do more of it. Pam: [00:34:28] Well, know, I think awareness obviously is key. And I think, to be honest, you probably have always been doing it. I can say it that way. Pam: [00:34:38] Then your awareness is catapulted you to use that awareness to even be more acute in helping facilitating others. You know, obviously teaching it as well. But I think a lot of people. My point was I think a lot of people are aware that they’re wanting to be aware and mean they’re screaming to be word. How do I become aware of something that will say I know their own body and they may be asking themselves the question, well, “Why don’t I know in the same way that you might work on my body?” So why doesn’t Western know? And sometimes I do. And sometimes I don’t know why. Pam: [00:35:08] They don’t want to have fear of not know what whatever it is. It might be scary. It might be something wrong. It might gonna kill me. So people block things because that’s the blockage of energy through emotional stuff. But we’re time. Weston Jolly: [00:35:25] What beliefs are we talking about? Something deeper. Pam: [00:35:30] Beliefs and thoughts, thoughts as the thoughts is just the belief in motion, you know. Weston Jolly: [00:35:37] Exactly. You mean that’s that. I may not want to know this because I think that it might hurt me or be disruptive to my relationship or to something. Pam: [00:35:48] It might mean something more than I don’t want it to me. Pam: [00:35:50] Right. And I think that makes a lot of sense. And people avoid that like the plague, because you have to change anything. Pam: [00:35:56] That’s another thing. Why people don’t want it. What do you mean? Do I? What do you think now? Probably change something. But it is just a thought. To change it doesn’t necessarily mean you have to change your life. Eventually we are thoughts will change you. Changes your life. Sure. So it’s like. But you don’t want to go in with that idea that you have to change everything. Weston Jolly: [00:36:22] Would you agree that it’s our souls desire to express ourselves in this physical room with our bodies? Yes. OK. Then would you also appreciate our based upon the last segment that we want to change? Pam: [00:36:39] So does it doesn’t mean that you’re on track with your soul. Weston Jolly: [00:36:44] I’m with you. But that’s part of what I like about it. To. To have that soul, shall we say, give it the tarmac to really take off the Lear jet, to do what it’s come here to do in our embodiment without having to panic that we’re gonna die. I mean, it could, I guess, but it could do that walking across the street, but getting aligned in that way energetically in terms of the flow physically and is especially psychically and otherwise. There’s something magical about that. Not not just kind of magical. It’s really, really beautiful to realize. Finally, I’m in the groove and I’m doing what I came here to, quote unquote, do. Pam: [00:37:22] So there’s there’s some theories here. Yeah. Is that the physical? Third dimension, third rock from the sun is on the third chakra, which is control for people like control. Weston Jolly: [00:37:35] Where is the third chakra? The solar plexus. I just wanna get that cleared up. Pam: [00:37:44] So the problem with it based on that is also based on survival, because the we have an animal body, our physical is an animal body which is based on survival. Sure. So in the physical plane is survival. So we’re here we come into the physical. If this is a cosmology, by the way, is a piece of I call it piece of God that wanted experience, not knowing stuff that you actually got into the body. Weston Jolly: [00:38:13] This is a place that you have to get that, you know, stuff. Pam: [00:38:17] Right. So you have to be in forget. for I called the forget. gene. And so you come in, you’re like, what is this? Who am I? What am I about? Right. So for about 30 years, you’re developing a personality and an ego in order to stay in the body. So then around supposedly some of the theories and I read books to actually collaborate. Why? One book says to another box that I sure don’t or not. You know, so I have backup. And that’s the research part is that around 30 or 35 is when you start, your soul goes nice that she made that personality. . Pam: [00:39:04] So that is like midlife crisis. If you look at that and you’re like, oh, I got all my you know, I went down to school and I got all my education. And now I don’t like that anymore. I’m in a relationship for 20, 15 years. And now I. Something’s happening. And so this is where the fear is like of what did you get in me to? It’d be better if we could actually. And my kind of when I look back, I did all these things through my life and had some interesting experiences of my life. And I realized that my soul was doing that the whole time. Right. And that when I recognized what my soul’s doing, I’m right back in feeling. Yes. This is just like this whole business that I’m in. It was something that didn’t wasn’t there for, but it was wanting to be here. Right. My soul wanted this to be here for all these people and and to help people. And the drive behind that was so strong. But it didn’t fit anywhere. It didn’t fit in the nursing. You know, the traditional nursing. Weston Jolly: [00:40:16] Welcome to the side of the universe where you don’t have to categorize what you’re doing. This is not. Pam: [00:40:23] And but people like it. Right. You know, you find out like you like it and then other people like it. And only people are like minded. Like it’s led you get rid of the people that don’t like it so that you don’t respect it no matter what you like. Pam: [00:40:35] I don’t care what I can do this now because I really like that way. Pam: [00:40:39] You do. So it’s like it fits. It can see work. So that’s where understanding that your soul, if you can recognize that your soul was there a whole time, you know, plodding out little weird things and watching and stuff to be able to blossom when it can. Weston Jolly: [00:40:59] That’s so cool because I see that a lot. I saw that very quickly with my own self. I called a mile markers or, you know, the little things we have inside the road to determine how far we have to go to Flagstaff or Sedona to look backwards and says, boy, that I was showing myself the whole time like Hansel and Gretel crumbs to who I am when I’m here to do. And it really helped heal, helped me to remove my anxiety or fear, to say, hey, there’s a bigger planning going on. I’m obviously leaving this this thing. Pam: [00:41:32] So get out of the way and let myself express further, get rid of guilt cause, you know, look like you went off the road there. Right. But you really weren’t. There was a thing that you had to go pick up off the road. Right. And you gave a bigger, stronger understanding. Weston Jolly: [00:41:49] Pam, I have insight that you read. Give us an idea how many books a week? Pam: [00:41:55] I usually have three books going. You have an energy book? I usually have a technique. And a lot of the books I have, I don’t read completely their references. And so when I have them, look up at them. I have studies show them the books are pulled together at the right time, at the right. And I trust that my soul or my neurotic universe or whatever is doing that, because I’ll study and like, wow, I read this book before, but I never saw that. So I was trying to think in terms of how many books say we can do based on how Amazon charges you, I and I look at how many times I look at Amazon as to searching for books that are interesting to me. Pam: [00:42:46] And then I learned this new book, New Name, and I can’t remember the name. It’s some kind of Japanese name for people who will buy books, even though they’re not going to read them, just for fear that you’re going to miss some information. Pam: [00:42:59] They’re missing out only in that respect. Pam: [00:43:01] I can of the I went, oh, no, there’s a word for that, because it isn’t like I read I read a lot of books. Right. But I don’t read all of them all the time. Weston Jolly: [00:43:13] So give me an idea. Give us an idea about how many, let’s say annually. Pam: [00:43:20] I had to go back to the weekly. So I have three going. Like. Yeah. OK. And then at any given time, then I finish a book, get a new one. Right. Finish. So it’s like three going. Pam: [00:43:33] But there’s a reason for this. No, no, no. I’m serious. What would tell me or I’ll help. What’s what’s the reason that you find the desire. This and by the way, we should understand the kinds of books, pens, reading aren’t 8th grade novels. Pam: [00:43:49] I have some of those. No, let’s just study. Weston Jolly: [00:43:52] Some of these things are really, really deep. And that fits based upon some of your medical background, certainly your intellectual abilities. But you’re really reading some things that most people, even in the profession of the profession, may or may not be reading. And I find that fascinating as another intellectual of sorts. But you’re doing something with that. And I’m interested in why. Pam: [00:44:14] Yeah, this is a social thing. I’ve kind of discovered lately about social drive for truth. And also, my soul wants to merge with other people and help them find their truth. Right. Pam: [00:44:31] So in order to do that, in order to do that, I have to actually have resources. You know, if I say something, they go, where’d you get that? You know, so that gives them another place to go in care instead of me being the answer person. So I want them to start their own quest. Weston Jolly: [00:44:52] So but you’re now telling me,that you are using this information to confirm the physical confirmation. Pam: [00:44:59] This is the scientific side. OK. So and it sounds like. And I think I’m right with this. That the scientific side is kind of catching up. Maybe a little bit in some of these departments. So we can actually point to a study or these books or these points of reference so that someone that maybe didn’t have a physical understanding can now, even without the will, will remove the will and to say, hey, there’s something going on here and people began to measure it. I think it’s fascinating, though, that you are have that unique balance, because I seem to have that interest, too, to being extremely spiritual. And there’s a part of me that loves to have the physical confirmation. And so I, like you, are in different departments reading, you know, physics and quantum physics and things like that. Not because I’m trying to have a doctorate, only to see different pieces that I can use as a confirmation to point to someone else beyond my own self. So it doesn’t appear like I’m making something up, which is important, I think, for some people along the process. Nationally, we don’t have to use it, but I think it’s thing that you’re actually so skilled in that department, meaning you’re you’re not just a casual reader about that was within an industry. You’re very much in solich, you’re in certain industries. We have continuing education credits and you know, you’re you you pass it up. And three hours of the first week, I mean, you know, you really consume a lot of information. Pam: [00:46:22] It’s sort of like a study. It’s like something’s thrown out. And then I look, for example, myofascial and with trauma and where things are stored and the energy all are coming together. And because they mention each other and all these to these groups, I go like that. So I see patterns in the future of what? And then I see things coming towards me that would back that up. And as it’s also to teach and to if people ask me, you know, where do you get that information? And they. They could go there if they wanted to. They don’t have times of, well, this book look at this book. And I know this life. And they kind of go like this is war room specific is like this. We’re talking about energy. Do you really want to know where a person came in? And then she says she’s so tired. Is it just because of her age and everything? I says, well, I have this book called Charge, which is really cool. It’s saying energy is a charge. And you can either ramp up the charge or decree or disperse the charge, which is a really cool way of understanding energy. And it’s a really cool book to how to harvest your own energy. If you’re too anxious or something, you could actually, ah, harvest that and hold it for later. That’s all a new idea. Weston Jolly: [00:47:49] I see all that’s a best case a day of me. And I actually study a lot of that even from a physical perspective. But that which you described as a battery. Pam: [00:47:56] So what we’re doing is charging the battery so we can use that amount of time if you’re freezing out with an air of anxiety and fear of discharging, but you don’t have anything later, you’re just all pooped because you’re discharged. But you didn’t you could actually. Ha. She gives this idea that you can actually harvest that energy for later. Pam: [00:48:19] Which is a real fascinating idea for people who are chronically tired or being anxious and worried, and when you’re working with somebody, do you find that you get tired on an individual that you work with? Or how do you stay shows he charges your own. Pam: [00:48:35] And it’s the belief system of leaving one person washing my hands. And to do it eventually, by the end of the day, it’s like, oh, and the. And I find that and I’m still working on that cause we’re always working pregnant. Sure. Is that teaching? I have to actually merge with each student to see if they are mentally tracking with me. Right? Right. And then if I do massage teaching, which I do, I put my hands on their hands and I’m seeing what they’re doing. And so now I realize that that’s what I’ve been doing. I merge with people. And then separate from them, that’s what I’ve learned. But I have to also process it like at the end of a class that I have. Sixteen, twenty students or it there’s a time when I don’t talk. My I come home and my husband goes, are you okay? I can talk. I have to process. And I kind of figure out where I’m processing each person. I kind of like go through each person and see if I’m complete with that. Weston Jolly: [00:49:39] What we did and what accomplish, just really interesting because I absolutely do that individually. I do that a lot remotely in group form as well. So I can feel an audience before I arrive. I can feel what’s happening and what someone’s going to stand up. But I guess sometimes you can even tell you the person that’s going to ask me the question that they do. And it’s fun. And at the same time, sometimes for me, it can be hard to get to sleep because I’m so, you know, charge up with all this energy. And it’s it’s a cool thing. It’s I guess in one sense, it’s like I’m playing guitar on stage and being really into your your gift. And I do think of it that way. But at the same time, I’m trying to kind of calm down because I need to go to sleep for the night. Then there’s things that I do, too, to stay open to the process so that I’m recharging as much as I’m continuing to. Pam: [00:50:29] It is difficult. Well, and the empath part of it is it. I don’t give that bright light. That’s it. That’s that. I kind of gets growing. And also I’m like, oh, that’s what happened during the class. Pam: [00:50:41] Sure. So I don’t get is I’m like on a time lag. So I’m going something is clearing. I don’t exactly know what that is. Weston Jolly: [00:50:50] I mean, I understand my type personally would not allow it. Pam: [00:50:54] So it has to be now or we’re not going to. We’re not going to deal with it. So that’s a difference in heaviness like it is to have patience. I’m still learning that part. So when is that coming at me with the feeling when you go to teach somebody to feel energy? Weston Jolly: [00:51:15] And I’m speaking of more of the esoteric energy, because I think personally it would be easier to teach someone the hot and cold. I think that would be easier and possibly easier. But I’ve done this energetically lots of times. Somebody put their hand hovering above my hand to see if they can feel my energy. Someone who’s more aware in whatever ways didn’t how to read through that. That part of our bodies, they can feel it pretty quickly. And others may take them on. And I can do it without again having to procreate the exercise of putting up my hand. But it creates a focused attention for the moment. And at one point they can say, oh, I think I felt something and they could be hot or cold, which I’m hoping that they might become more. And then ultimately, they don’t need me to, shall we say, jump start them to feel that. How do you help others? And becoming aware of how this energy flows and what’s a desired energy. Think of it like a river versus is only trickling in. We don’t we don’t have enough flow. Or maybe it’s not flowing. I’ll use the term healthy enough. It’s it’s not a very nice electrical flow. Pam: [00:52:22] Well, it’s difficult. And that’s part of me going like with students. It’s I usually tell them a lot of information that they’re going to get in a couple years. And that’s where I download. And they get really scared. Like what? Sure. And I say, no, you’re going in. You’re going to want this because I know they can’t get it cause they’re at different levels. Right. Some are really you know, I’ve got a few that are like. Right. But they have done stuff in their work, you know, because it’s it’s kind of hard to see their work, their own personal and personal growth and awareness and openness. Sure. Sure. Whereas they have the closed ones. And we’re just gonna do this. We’re just gonna do that and write me a sequence. Give me something to do. A process like. But massage in itself is an art form for me. And it’s a relationship. So you can’t there isn’t there is some sequencing so that you just don’t forget to cover all the bases so that people get touched all over it legally. Right. But but then you have to be able to know where to go, what needs what’s constricted, what’s not constricted. Pam: [00:53:34] That’s more is you you can I can at least try and get people who say, this is not me. This is stuck. I feel this still. It has to be physical. This isn’t moving. You feel this way, feel the other leg. Is that. That’s the kind of thing. So I have to start with physical, and that’s why I always use body and massage as a physical tool portal. Okay. To the other things as well. And then they watch me and I say, well. Pam: [00:54:06] This is this is not movie. This is not moving and this man on the skeletal system. This happened in a class and I go. Did you fall out of a tree? Yes. And the rest is the rest. The class went, how I like. I don’t know. I just I just went with it. It feels like it went bing, bing, bing, bing, bing. Like you fell out of a tree. Pam: [00:54:29] But not really, because I can say it this way. It’s like you having a piece of the puzzle, then another piece of the puzzle. Then suddenly you have enough of the puzzle. You can say, oh, I’m looking at an image of some of the tree. Then because of that, you share that until it appears that confirmation. So yeah. Accurate. Yeah, yeah. Pam: [00:54:46] So I think that’s something that it frustrates the students because like I don’t do what you’re doing. Well, everybody does it differently. I may never be able to do that, that you but you will have your ways. Pam: [00:54:59] If you’re interested in helping people and working with people, you will do your thing. Pam: [00:55:05] And it starts. Pam does not with our own selves. Like you said to the students, that the more open that we are within our own selves. And I’m speaking of not having resistance conscious or unconscious resistance so that this information will be shared from me as a spiritual channel and or the universe as a whole or, you know, you or anybody else is walking on the street. That if we open ourselves to this, that the universe will just communicate. So we say everything we need to know. Pam: [00:55:34] But that, again, is hard to open because we’ve been socialized. And socialization kind of teaches us not to just be totally open, to be careful. You mean you have to be careful and you have to be polite and you have to do this and you do that. And so that those are things that you have to you still can be polite and be open to, you know, but that some other resistance is. No, that can’t be to keep you going. Okay. Weston Jolly: [00:56:05] When you’re ready, would you give us as a tip, call it a homework assignment that we could work on individually that would help us to become more connected to our our body, our soul and our body. Pam: [00:56:22] I think becoming aware. I tell my students, like when you talk to yourself, who you talking to? So becoming more aware is who you’re talking to. Weston Jolly: [00:56:32] Are you referring to my ego or. Yeah. OK. It’s important to know if you’re talking to your ego. I think your ego is talking to you to make sure we’re clear. Pam: [00:56:41] Yeah. Yeah. So the idea is like you’ll say, well, that isn’t true. You like who? Don’t talk to me. So you have like I call it with some of my clients, a board of directors. Right. So there is a meditation as to put a table, a big table in a safe room and put your different your physical body or mental awadi or emotional body, your spiritual body, your intuitive body, your divine body or mind, because they both have that at a board of directors. Right. Weston Jolly: [00:57:19] And say who wants. Pam: [00:57:22] Have the tables. So the microphone, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then take note cause you’re the observer. Right. And you become the observer and you kind of go like, who’s talking first? You know, the physical goes like, well I’ve been trying to tell you because the physical is trying to tell you something is not in balance with some of the physically jerks because it’s gonna get is going to hurt and it’s going to say, hey. Right. So the physical will keep hurting. in2, you get the message. And if you say, oh, I got the message, you don’t like that. And it goes it will give up the pain. If it was in emotional pain. Sure. And so I know that if they could do that, then some of the pain would go away. Cause that’s what they want is get rid of the pain. Weston Jolly: [00:58:12] So let me summarize what we’ve learned. So there’s a suggestion that you’re putting forth that if we brought these different components of who we are into a forum, a board of directors forum, and we give these pieces of who we are, an opportunity to speak and be very attentive to who’s speaking versus who isn’t and show they just take note from a server perspective so that we can put something in play that creates balance. Pam: [00:58:37] Right. The main thing is being open that you have these different aspects. See, a lot of people don’t really realize they have all these people. That’s why I said who to when you talk to yourself. Who are you talking to? Here’s your audience and who’s who’s talking. It allows them to like I do that. Like, who am I talking to and why am and why are you talking to? What is that about? So that’s just a vehicle that, you know, a pitcher or a guided imagery. Sure. To utilize the fact that accepting that you have all these parts to you that have ideas that probably subconsciously are prodding you. Weston Jolly: [00:59:22] I think that’s a very interesting exercise because it it works very, very well with the human mind. And the reason why is because human mind likes rather categorized. So it loves the idea that, oh, we’re now talking to Westerns, higher self. We’re talking to his left leg. And so, like, I can deal with that. Pam: [00:59:41] That’s cause I’m more of a mental person now. Weston Jolly: [00:59:42] I know it, but I’m teasing. But there’s something about being able to have that distinction between those different pieces and parts at the same time at one point when one’s ready to integrate that so that we understand that, OK, this is Wesson’s ego saying that I want to flip somebody off because they driving too slow or that’s some part of Weston that says, you know, we should get off the freeway now because it’s dangerous. And instead of me interpreting that, I need to put my energy towards someone being in my way. Maybe I’m trying to tell myself it’s time to go, you know, have a cup of tea someplace. So I think that’s cool. Before we wrap up, can you share with me? Weston Jolly: [01:00:21] Why? You don’t like emotions. Pam: [01:00:25] It’s them empathic me. I’ve been thinking about this like a throw line. I don’t mind laughter or joy those. It’s the harder motions that are murkier here that have a little bit more charge to them as a negative or undesired. It will either e if you say negative, then you have negative anger. Negative is sadness negative. See this where we we can’t actually label them. We’re just going to say that they don’t feel as good. They have to because they have purpose. Any purpose? Pam: [01:01:04] Sure. And the main thing is probably the sensitive in me doesn’t want since it runs through me. You know, if I tell somebody, if I’m mad at somebody and I tell them off, it’s just like hitting myself in the face. Weston Jolly: [01:01:21] So I wanna make sure I understand this. The reason I’m asking this question, because a lot of people, I think, are challenged with this. Not everybody. And actually probably a very small segment. But those who are affected in this way, I think would be really benefit from this dialogue here, because there’s a part of you that may want to leave you with this question. May. Process and emotion as if. Do I have to. Yeah. When there’s a faster way. Is that a fair way? Pam: [01:01:49] Yeah. So I’ve gone like like my husband goes when we first started dating and that stuff. He goes on, I’d say something, he’d say something and say, I’m sorry. He goes, why do you take the blame for everything? I says, I’m sorry, but I’m not taking the blame. I’m just sorry you feel that way. Right. And I need to cut to the chase. Pam: [01:02:10] I don’t have energy to build up until a crescendo where somebody is yelling and you’re yelling back and forth. Because I don’t have time for cutting it off and be sorry before we’re gone. I’m sorry for what ever I contributed to. I’m not taking the blame for everything. Weston Jolly: [01:02:27] No. It’s kind to kind of nice because it makes arguments come to an end before they start. Pam: [01:02:32] And you never have to build and you never take the risk of dumping a bunch of stuff that you don’t want in that mix, because you really need to keep things separate and you don’t want to dump a bunch of. Well, I’ve always hated the way you did there at all. And then you’ve had to back yourself out of all of those things that you’ve said. Right. And so and you just want to get this one thing. Can we order this one thing that we can? And that’s how I’ve learned to cut to the chase. Weston Jolly: [01:03:06] So we’re gonna reshape this. Not it’s not emotions at large is just that you are saying and this is why I want to bring it forth. Is that there’s a faster way to process than actually being limited to some of the emotions or some of the ways that we express emotions. And because of that, you’re actually shirking and creating a faster way to get to the other side. Pam: [01:03:25] That’s why it is not that I value emotion because energy in emotion, it fuels sure, it gives movement towards your mental your ideas. You don’t have enthusiasm. You’re not going to do anything that you thought you wanted to do. Pam: [01:03:42] So I honor I appreciate emotions, but I don’t have time. Like I had one client that was I don’t say name. So that that’s coming. And that all the sudden we had ten minutes left. And she goes, I had says with my father, I go and start crying. And it’s like, is this a new information as well? I said. And she goes, no. I says, is there anything we need to do about. Ten minutes. I have the next person in the outside office. Is there anything we need to do? But. No. It’s like. Right. Pam: [01:04:24] So we. Okay. You want me to do anything about those? No. OK. We we had to cover all those bases because that can be a really problematic thing. And you leave somebody. Hey, ten minutes. Pam: [01:04:39] Well, no, I think. And I was laughing. But I won’t be very respectful because, of course, we want to help someone direct this thing that’s coming forth and recognizing through these questions of what can we do constructively to take this emotion and or this story forward is really, really beautiful. And again, some people want that. And as you know as well, some people may or may not, they may margins regurgitate the story. Weston Jolly: [01:05:03] Pam, I want to thank you so much for taking your time to join us this afternoon. And I personally can share with you. I’m so grateful to call you friend. And certainly you all that you do for me and my family and certainly for all of us who are benefiting from solar panels or. Weston Jolly: [01:05:20] Well, I’m telling you, she’s a treasure of understanding and not just of the intellectual side. So, Pam, just thank you so much for being with us. Thank you. Privilege. WRITE A REVIEW It only takes a few minutes. Your comments and review truly assist others in becoming a part of our spiritual community. Write a Review now SOMETHING MORE Contact Us HereTelephone: (480) 212-1961 More Podcasts This Will Make You Laugh or Cry | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 65 When you’ve lost something important there can be a lot of stress in trying to remember where you put it, or perhaps of extreme value and you can’t remember the password? Listen to this it will absolutely help. My Octopus Oracle | True Connectio
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Body & Soul | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 58
Hi, I’m Weston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story Opening Up Your Body & Soul Your body is often overlooked in the ways that it can connect you to your Higher Self If you’re going to embrace the new year with 20/20 INSIGHT, we have to address the elephant in the room – our bodies. It’s likely that you take your body for granted. Even if you haven’t, we want to put special attention in tuning into our bodies so that we might really benefit of what we’re trying to spiritually, and physically, show ourselves. Make your New Year’s resolution to make your desired changes by listening to this Body & Soul series. In this first episode, I’m interviewing the wonderful Desiree Rumbaugh, an internationally known force in the Yoga community. Desiree offers her 30 years in teaching Anusara Yoga worldwide, that has changed her life and thousands and thousands of others. Listen to a beautiful narrative in how connecting with your body nourishes your soul. This kind of awareness sharpens our individual purpose and perspective even during the toughest of times. Regardless of where you are presently, accept yourself and further develop your body and soul connection. Respectfully, even Old Souls need to take care of their bodies! And don’t forget to check this out if you’re interested in Yoga. Click on the above media player or read the full transcript below. (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 058 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: Body & Soul (Interview with Desiree Rumbaugh) Weston: [00:00:07] True Connections is a journey within to discover that you are part of everything. Life can often feel disjointed, but you and I are actually connected to one another, to nature, to animals and many other ways like your thoughts, intentions, dreams, even your imagination. It’s my desire to bring spiritual insight to these true connections so that you can get into the flow of life, received the things that you want without struggle and enjoy a more constant level of happiness. I am Weston Jolly, your host. Weston: [00:00:44] Body and Soul. To start the New Year, I thought we’d focus on the subject of body and soul. Now, I know that you’ve heard these two words being thrown together, but I want to specifically focus on what we are trying to show ourselves with our bodies. It’s true, if you have a healthy body, you probably don’t think about it. But what I want to focus on with this Body and Soul series is actually listening to what our bodies are trying to tell us. Truth is, we are usually taking our bodies for granted until something happens that forces our attention to be present was something that we need to be aware of. Connecting with your body will automatically connect you with your soul. If you want to put the two categories together, it’s my observation that most of this practice is a huge disconnect with our bodies. For example, most of the time we take this precious vessel, our body for granted to such an extreme that we may or may not really understand what’s happening within the body and more importantly, what you’re actually feeling. Now, why would feeling be so important? Well, the reason is that our ability to feel as interpreted by our body and mind. It’s a wonderful path to connecting with our soul. Certainly this is true if you’re listening. I have invited several people to join me in also getting their perspectives, thoughts and opinions to put a light on the body and soul connection. It is my, or should I say our intention and purpose that you would open yourself to hear, see and follow any new practices in integrating with your body in a way that deepens your illumination of your soul. Listen carefully as it will be many layers, spiritual layers discussed, and how we can unite our body and soul together. So let’s get started and listening to our first guest. Weston: [00:02:47] Thank you for joining us. I’m very honored today to have someone special to talk with. And Desiree Rumbaugh is someone who’s been teaching yoga now for 30 years internationally. Now, most yoga teachers don’t have that opportunity. I’m very curious to find out, of course, a little bit more about Desiree and what she has done and continues to do and why she does it. And Desiree, I just wanted to thank you very much for being on the program here with us. Desiree: [00:03:18] Thank you. Weston: [00:03:18] I’m excited too Weston. And Desiree, we were just discussing this just a moment ago that we came into contact with one another, what, like twenty one years ago? Something like that. So it’s been quite a while. I was just wondering what started you on your journey? Desiree: [00:03:36] It was the late 80s and I was an aerobics teacher. Everyone I knew was teaching aerobics in the 80s, right? Sure. Jane Fonda. Desiree: [00:03:45] Right? Desiree: [00:03:46] I went to a convention for aerobics in L.A. and there was one yoga class being offered, which is so funny now because they’re so popular. Weston: [00:03:54] One yoga class? I got a backup. One yoga class? Yeah. Desiree: [00:03:58] And the rest was all different forms of aerobics. Wow. And so I tried it out of curiosity. Total curiosity having been a dancer. Of course I took to it immediately because it was poses that I could do cause I was naturally flexible anyway. Sure. And I thought I’m going to seek this out. And I really had to work to seek it out, even in Southern California. But I found it and I just drove into it, pursued it because it spoke to my heart more than aerobics. Weston: [00:04:27] How is it that someone becomes a international yoga teacher? And I know that you’ve lovingly make contributions to several yoga periodicals as well. Desiree: [00:04:41] Yeah. Well, that all began after I met my teacher back in 93. John’s friend at the time, and he created a style or method of Hatha Yoga called Anusara. And so I was lucky to get in there at the very beginning of that. And because I was like the fourth teacher in the world to be certified in that style, it became popular quickly and people started inviting those of us who were certified early on to become presenters and teach their community this method. Weston: [00:05:14] I had no idea. Yeah. The fourth person in the world to teach that? Yeah, I was, I was back then. Desiree: [00:05:22] Now there’s so many methods, so many people have created their own method now. But back then that was unusual. Sure. I grew up in the Iyengar System and that’s what he was into. Iyengar has been around for a long time. That method. We met there, and then he branched off, and I followed him. And that’s how that started. Weston: [00:05:41] Well, as you know, Desiree our theme today is on the body and the soul. And I want to share with our audience a couple of questions that I’m going to be asking you, so at the moment I’m going to ask that you not answer them, but give me an opportunity to share that with everybody else. I’m interested in knowing a little bit more about what makes the body, mind and soul connection. And basically, there’s a lot of people that are almost overt in their choices to be athletic or tuned into their bodies. And there seems to be almost the opposite where there’s the other half or the other portion, lets just put it that way, that really, really struggles to be in their embodiment for whatever reason. So I’d love to talk about that in a moment. And I know that, you know, sometimes we’re not necessarily always feeling encouraged or something has happened in our life. Or maybe our whole life seems to have added up to almost this lethargic feeling like we shouldn’t participate in being in our body. And I’m very interested in a little bit of your story, too, and how that interrelates into you getting involved in yoga, unlike you Desiree. . . Weston: [00:06:49] I have not had a natural proclivity to be flexible, meaning my hamstrings are as hard as they possibly could be, which makes me probably a great tennis player, which I like to attack. But in terms of being able to flex that way, I know that I have had to go through quite a bit of even emotional things to discover what’s going on with that particular muscle group that has kept me from being inflexible. Anyway, so I wanted to talk about some things like that, if you see that within other people as well. And I would love for you to offer some steps, some specific steps on how we might actually begin to immediately put our body into motion for the purposes and the benefit of our soul, and what that looks like. So let’s kind of swing back to the beginning and Desiree, us an idea of, again, from a personal perspective, what really threw you into the yoga practice, was it just, you know, going from one activity to another or is there something deeper than that? Desiree: [00:07:49] There was a recognition in me, in my early classes that put tears in my eyes. I don’t know why, but like the feeling, I should be doing this came to me very strongly, not just because I could because I was flexible, but also there was something else happening besides the physicality of being a dancer, performing dancer. I was just standing in a room full of other people on a mat doing a triangle pose. And then when you do things like back bends we were laying on blocks, you know those foam yoga blocks. Yeah. Yeah. You lay on them with your arms open and your eyes are closed and nobody’s watching me perform. It was different then them. I’m not doing it for that reason and I’m feeling, causing myself to stay and feel. And then I would start to cry. Something was bubbling up from within that I didn’t understand. So. This was not a particularly happy time in my life, when I found yoga either. I was not happily married, two little kids, felt stuck. Felt like, obligated to stay in this thing, but not happily, and looking for answers. So I think that’s what drew me into too. Felt like, I think I’m gonna find an answer here to my struggles. Weston: [00:09:02] Would it be fair to say that through this process that you discovered more about your body, of course, but also about some soul attributes? Desiree: [00:09:13] I think so, for sure. I became much more empowered. I grew up like you did, Catholic religion, religious, going to church. Desiree: [00:09:23] And I was into that completely. But this eastern kind of philosophy was so different and it peaked my interest and drew me in and it introduced me to myself more than I had ever found before. But I was also young, I was late 20s. I guess that’s not that young to start questioning things that you’ve learned in your youth and to wonder who am I? You know. Sure. How did I end up here. What am I doing with my life? I think that’s where I was. Weston: [00:09:52] It’s interesting because actually I grew up, or I was exposed to the Episcopal Church, which is of course an offshoot of Catholic. But, the nature, my connection to the divine or spirit was something that I can never not remember. And yet it wasn’t the same as what I had experienced in many different forms of my growing up and jumping around to different religious practices. Weston: [00:10:21] And I remember going to Santa Monica and writing with the heel of my foot, not thinking this huge, huge question mark, but it probably was, I don’t know, 50 feet large. And it was my thought, font size would matter to God. So I figured if I made the question mark big enough, then there would be a response. And this is ages ago and I was just had this insatiable curiosity that there has to be something more. And like you, I just felt at one point just completely moved. And it’s, one could even use words called, but that sounds like a religious term, but rather just moved to pursue something that was totally outside of what I’m thinking I would do based upon my background. And yet I can’t even begin to fathom having done or doing what I continue to do in the same way that perhaps you do. Desiree: [00:11:20] Yeah, it is. It’s really hitting me now, talking to you. I haven’t spoken about this with anybody before about that time in our lives when we, I grew up following the rules, like the Catholic Church is perfect for a little girl that wants to follow rules. To do everything right and do everything we adults tell you to, and your life will turn out perfect. And then my life wasn’t turning out very happy. And that’s the questioning. That’s like my midlife crisis. Rebellion started then. Weston: [00:11:49] Well, it’s fair. Weston: [00:11:51] I actually, one could actually say that I joined organized religion for that reason as well, because I felt that if I did certain kinds of things well, which I had a proclivity to do, that there would be reward for that. And of course, that meant understanding and Weston: [00:12:09] compliance and self-discipline, which in one sense we could even use the word control. But the change was significant because, you know, what I bumped into, actually with my family in Hawaii, just journaling out of the blue suddenly took me into a completely different direction, but it was something that just moved me slash my soul, and of course my body. And the reason I wanted to talk about body and soul as an integrating piece is, because a lot of people separate that. They see our soul connection, as something that were striving to do almost outside of our bodies, or as if there is this great big tractor that’s keeping these two things separate. And I know for you and if you don’t mind me complimenting you, you have beautiful body and the things that you do with your body, Desiree, and just as an observer, not having been the kind of dancer that you are. I don’t mind free dancing, but you have a tremendous connection to your body, and I’m interested, do you think that’s a spiritual connection? Desiree: [00:13:17] Definitely now, probably not when I was younger. Desiree: [00:13:22] And yeah, I do have a connection. I think I was born to do this. And I know what you saying about some people separate the two. Early on in my career, I would have students come in and say I’m only here for the physical part of yoga. Desiree: [00:13:34] I’m not interested in the spirituality. It’s laughable. These are very earnest. I’m telling you about it as teachers. You go okay, I’m only going to talk to your body, I’m not going to talk to your heart. Okay. So don’t listen with your heart. It’s just a body. Desiree: [00:13:51] Yeah, but God bless them. If they stay with this practice, it does integrate for all of us. It can’t help but get to us. We wake up our feelings. As yoga teachers we try to get people to feel, not just do you know. Yes. Were a human being. Not just a human doing. Weston: [00:14:10] It’s interesting, in all my channeling that thought, that question, actually. The inquiry of how do you feel? I probably asked that question of others in my own personal journaling, hundreds of times, if not hundreds of thousands of times. And I’m not exaggerating with that, because that language and I say language because it’s much more truthful than the language that we use today in terms of English or whatever nationality that we happen to practice, is very interesting because those feelings that we have, and I’m not talking about just being on the recipient of feelings, but rather realizing that we’re actually choosing and creating these feelings. And showing ourselves with these feelings is pretty incredible. And yeah, I think that yoga as a practice turns on a light. Weston: [00:15:02] I mean, you know, I got exposed to meditation by running, actually, and this first time my mind slipped out a gear. And then it was it dawned on me that this could be cool to actually sit down. And as a type A personality that just seemed insane. And yoga as a practice too is something that I practice irregularly, to be totally honest with you and everybody else. But there’s something about it in the breathing, the connection, that for me personally, I just have say it this way is I can’t help but feel the spirituality of it. And I’m not trying to, I’m just. But it’s different than doing sit ups at the gym. I don’t feel that doing that, or, you know, doing pull ups or something different. There’s something about these practices. I’m not talking about just one genre of yoga either that, shall we say again, calls to my soul to has me pulled into wanting to participate or even just to watch. I mean, just watching a group of people. I just feel the desire of communion to be there. And that’s something pretty marvelous to be a part of and especially you as a teacher. Desiree: [00:16:07] It is. It’s like conducting a grand symphony of people who are 100 percent present, when you teach yoga. It’s really wonderful, especially if people are more skilled and more advanced in their studies and they really know what they’re doing. Not just so much about the poses, but they know why they’re doing what they’re doing. That’s an amazing group to be a among. Weston: [00:16:28] Yes, I agree, to have that synergy. I feel honored and I could even use the words blessed to feel the participation of spirit and everybody, of course. But as it flows through me and as I receive it as well. I just feel like, wow, this is just, it couldn’t get any better. And just being a part of the whole process. On your website, I noticed this quote, and I want to share with everybody, that you used to comment or the phrase, love is stronger than fear. I’m curious, what exactly does that mean? Desiree: [00:17:03] That’s the motto that I live by because I’m trying to learn all the time. Whenever I feel afraid. Or a weak or negative thoughts pop into my head. I’m turning in towards fear, I need to turn the ship around, and that’s one thing that yoga teaches is that you can actually 180-degrees change your thinking by processing it through your head and your heart and not just your head. I think I go into fear when I get into my head. And then I gotta drop down to my heart and my breath and really get still. And I can transform honestly, not just fake, transform that thought, and that feeling. And that’s when love is stronger than fear. And many of my students also use that motto. They like it. It resonates with them as the thing they’re trying to learn in their life, to come from that place of not being afraid of others, not being afraid of what other people think about you. You know, it’s a blocked way of living when when we’re fear-based, worrying. And then you can learn to tap into your intuition, like should I do this or should I not? Well it feels like it’s gonna be okay, we’ll trust that. Trust that. Don’t be afraid. Weston: [00:18:12] Right. When we remove that resistance, or I’ve often used the term separation, which comes, of course, from the mind or the ego. When we remove that division, we move automatically into a state of connection. And that connection is not ego based in terms of, or even competitive base. Meaning I’ve been to yoga classes where some of the, I may have to point to the guys, and this isn’t always the case, where they become a little competitive like, you know, I can do this. And I laugh. And I say, well, you know, I’m not really here for that. I’m interested in just, shall we say, doing the poses in a means that would connect me. I’m not really trying to impress anybody in class, because I don’t really feel like I have that skill set in that particular way. And I’m glad, because it keeps me away from having to give that as a thought as much as just really wanting to connect with my body. And that part is something, Desiree, and I see this very honorably in love of you. That’s something you’re really, really gifted at personally, and its something that you obviously teach to the point that you have been doing this for the length of time that you had. And it’s not because again, my observation is that you have to do this, but rather again this is something that you really, really enjoy. Desiree: [00:19:29] I have changed as a teacher over time. This is the blessing of being able to do what you love for such a long time, like you, is you evolve with it and you learn more. It’s amazing. I’m continuing to learn and appreciate things, and I also look at my younger self without judgment now, too. She was doing the best he could and younger teachers that maybe not as, I don’t know what it is. Is it a sensitivity that develops as you get older? I don’t judge them either because I understand that for where they are. That all makes sense. So I’ve become less judgmental, which is really nice. Desiree: [00:20:11] Because I’m less judgemental of myself. Desiree: [00:20:15] This phase that we are. These judgemental people that we are. We get far in the world. But at what price? Weston: [00:20:21] You know, I’m only laughing, by the way, because of my background of complete and utter judgement, which I’m still a part of. But it’s an amazing thing, and again judgement just a form of separation. But it’s amazing that we spend so much time there. And I don’t know why, but I do agree at this time in terms of where I sit as well. There’s been a change. There’s a softness if we can call it that, that I don’t find myself as harsh or cut and dry or black and white as I used to be. It’s still there, but it’s not something that I feel that I’m processing as if it was robotically leading me. And that’s really, really nice. And of course, if that that can be offered to anyone who’s wanting to sit in that of awareness regardless of one’s age. I think it’s an incredible gift. Desiree: [00:21:09] I specialized in about 2014, I started stepping more into the world of working with older people, but now I’m also attracting younger people that have grown. There are a lot of younger people now that want to learn this way of being. More considerate with the body, more open to listening to it. Yeah, we want to be challenged, but there’s another way to challenge, Desiree: [00:21:37] besides teaching acrobatic tricks. Desiree: [00:21:41] Yeah. The way you play, like they want to play the long game. That’s what I really teach. I don’t teach yoga for people who are afraid and weak. I teach yoga for people who are strong and want to continue. Because they learned the hard way. What you have to watch out for if you want to not wear your shoulders out, for instance, or your back. Weston: [00:21:59] The transformation? How would you describe the transformation that takes place with the body and soul from your perspective? When you practice regularly for a long period of time? Desiree: [00:22:18] Yeah, Well, the sensitivity, the softness you are talking about. One thing I love about yoga is I’ve learned how to heal my own aches and pains. And along the way, if you do anything physical tenants, for instance, it’s an asymmetrical sport right? Overhead. Right. One arm getting attacked all the time. Desiree: [00:22:42] There’s times when you have to go see a doctor, right? Shoulder. Right? Elbow. People get wrist issues. Desiree: [00:22:47] With all kinds of sports. Knees. And to be able to know how to heal that through the movement that I do with the strength, the muscularity and stuff. Its’ a huge gift. I liken it to people who can fix their house or their car and they don’t have to call an expert, you know? Weston: [00:23:04] Yeah. Well hold on. Lets back up a little bit. Are you suggesting that someone doesn’t have to be in perfect athletic condition to come practice yoga? If they are strong . . . Desiree: [00:23:18] it’s going to be easier for them. Okay. So when people come in and they’re weak or injured, they’re going to have to get stronger and heal that part first. And that’s how I’ve learned to teach that. So it’s not that they can’t do it. Its that strength is the doorway we all have to walk through. And if we are weak, we have to heal, and strengthen the weak part. And really the weaknesses, Weston: [00:23:38] It’s just us showing us something via our body, which is, of course, the last plane, and wanting to show something to us that this is something going on. Hey, take a look at this. You know pain is uncomfortable, or an issue is uncomfortable, but when we actually become aware of how it came to be, which may or may not be so simple. It’s not necessarily the cake. Cut and paste, you know, processes a lot of times we are familiar with today, but rather something goes deeper. And when we actually deal with that, it has an effect, meaning it has an effect on our body. So the soul, if you will, or a spiritual self, shall we say can create that balance. With out necessarily… I won’t say that we don’t have to apply ourselves, but not necessarily in the way that I think a lot of people. We let me back up. I don’t think people really understand that that connection can be made. And so if we went to a class or say, if I want your class, and I had a knee problem. It’s not about you forcing me to do something I can’t do. Desiree: [00:24:38] It’s the complete opposite. We call pain our little doer, our teacher. If you have any pain, that is there to teach or wake us up to learn how to move in a more efficient way to open up some tight places and strengthens the weak places so that the pain goes away and then we’re free. So it’s a little, it’s calling. It’s like a wake up call. That’s all it is. Yeah. And no, we’re never gonna cause more pain to that thing, but we are going to look into it. We’re gonna to stay away. That’s what people will do. They’ll come in. They’ll say, I know my limitations. I’ve got this bad knee. That will stop them. They’ll be sitting out for a lot of things and so I’ve learned from the methods I’ve studied and all the work I’ve done on my own body with physical therapy is, Desiree: [00:25:21] how to go into that with loving kindness and actually make it feel better rather than let it keep you away from things. It’s pretty marvelous. Weston: [00:25:30] It is. And actually you didn’t use the word. But I’m going to. And that’s compassion isn’t it, where you’re being so compassionate. And we can feel that. Not just in terms of the ruling of the teacher’s eyes, but really loving. And that that’s something that I I find with I’m going to say all yoga teachers. And I really have yet to have found one that didn’t have that intrinsic compassion and love that feels like I feel welcome. Even though I stepped in to a yoga group that I’ve ever been in before, and they’re just very, very loving. And it’s not a club or a group, or in the traditional sense, where we are hoping to be accepted to the club? It’s a very, very natural coalition or a collaboration of people coming together in a space that’s frankly pretty neutral, meaning neutral in the sense that outside of the different variations and pass that we have, including our our differences of lifestyle, to come in and do something different. And there’s something so compelling about that. Isn’t it? Desiree: [00:26:39] Yeah. Desiree: [00:26:39] Walking in and feeling like it’s okay for me to be here no matter what shape I’m in or what my thoughts are like or how much money I have, or what kind of education I have because everybody’s wearing T-shirts and shorts and they don’t know anything else about you. Your in your bare feet. That’s what I love about it. I’ve got people with PHD’s and multiple degrees and several houses. Their sitting in my class in their T-shirts, shorts, and bare feet and we’re working on the arches of their feet or their knees. It’s so beautiful.W Weston: [00:27:05] You can’t compare it. It is. It is. It’s kind of nice to step away from these perceived parts of who we are in terms of our identities. So you’re saying then too, that Desiree, the transformation is it something that we can develop or just something that happens to us as a result of getting connected to our bodies in this way? Desiree: [00:27:31] Definitely. We just always start from where we are. That’s what, I love what you said that we all are welcome here. It’s a come as you are a party. You don’t have to be such and such like have achieved a certain thing. It’s not a competitive thing. Like so many of the sports activities that people love are competitive because they need to have that goal. But in yoga, there’s no goal except getting to know yourself better and learning how to connect your head in your heart. Like that’s the only goal. Achieving poses is not the goal. Desiree: [00:28:01] Although it looks like the goal and it might lead some people for a while, it’s eventually going to have to shift because nobody’s body can take that kind of hard push to achieve, achieve for their whole lifetime. Be done. That’s not possible. I think it is a blessing. Weston: [00:28:19] I think that part is really interesting to me because of course, my background, which I’m going to call stereotypical which may or may not be true, but was very competitive. So, you know, we’re playing football, baseball, tennis, skiing. Even these individual sports were always, in from where I came from, quite competitive, not kind of. So going into a yoga class were, you know, what’s the goal? You know. Show me how to kick the football between the posts. You know, I’m looking for that. I’m laughing about my first son going in. And I was really confused. Is was like a game that we didn’t have any rules, and we’re just going to focus on ourselves. And I thought, well, what does that mean? Focus on myself? I mean, I’m looking around at other people in class and they seem to be doing better than I am. So I’m already going into that competitive mindset and realizing actually kind of quickly, almost alarmingly, that I don’t have to do that. And that was, again, a different kind of very subtle and very beautiful invitation that I don’t know if I would have experienced loss. I stepped into the class. Desiree: [00:29:22] Right. Yeah. And the way you describe it, it’s perfect. That’s exactly what it is. But, you know, the thing is, I take my yoga background into the gym with me because I took up weightlifting seriously a couple of years ago. And now I find that I can use that in there. And I just wonder if that crossover is happening for more and more people these days between whatever sport they love, that has the competitive nature of the goal, the achievement thing. And then the yoga that is in their blood now. Yeah. I think that’s starting to happen. Weston: [00:29:55] You know, my daughter lovingly determined that she wanted to interview me and she was on a recent podcast and we’re going to do some more of that. But she brought a perspective that sometimes being so close to the trees that I missed. And then I want to ask the question of you. Have you noticed a change in people at large, but especially young people in terms of their interest to be more connected? Desiree: [00:30:20] Well, the young people that I work with. Yeah, they’re awake at an earlier age than I remember. So, yes. And probably there’s so many reasons for that. The world we live in is driving people there sooner. There’s a need. Weston: [00:30:37] Yeah, I do think that, too? And actually it’s why I love your comment, your phrase that others are using that love is stronger than fear, because especially in today’s, shall we say, more recent political climate, which has been the total opposite of that. And when I say recent that’s been going on since the beginning of humankind. But the idea that we can focus on something that’s greater than separation and fear is incredible. And I feel through my daughters, you know, kind of putting a magnifying glass on that thought for me. I have slipped in that not knowing or, but there has been a tremendous change because I see individuals who have awareness that, boy, I didn’t get to a lot louder than them. And I’m not saying that competitively just in terms of objectively. And yet what a difference it makes to have an understanding of what your purposes, how you want to follow that purpose and do those things that just you feel compelled to do. There’s something about that, Desiree, that you have been using your body and your talents and your abilities. You know, obviously from the get go. But to really, really express that even a full and more complete expression, there’s something just really, really individually cool about that. Desiree: [00:31:58] I was just thinking about young people and the millennials. You know, they get a bad rap. But you and I have raised those kids. Weston: [00:32:07] Very true. Desiree: [00:32:09] I’m very active in my kids lives right now. My daughter has two babies. And so we moved in order to, so that I can help her with those babies every day. So I’m around that millennial energy quite often now. And sometimes we talk about it and work out together at the gym. Desiree: [00:32:24] I think my kids were born to tell me to stop living in fear. The millennial generation lives in the present moment. Where our generation was not doing that. Weston: [00:32:35] I’ve got to share this with you, but it was something that most people that know me to some degree have experience with. But when I first sat down to tell our children what this change of life was going to take place with regards to what dad did, because I was involved in business in a big way and I was making a huge shift. And I had this family meeting that I want you to think of as being more of like a board of directors meeting where I’m leading it and everyone else is quiet, which is, of course, the style that I was raised in. But we’re having this meeting. I’m telling the kids that there’s gonna be this big change. My son’s eleven, my daughter’s ten. And my son says, yeah, we’ve been expecting you to get here. And I’m talking about, you know, going from, you know, a coat and tie, to briefcase change, to God knows what I’m going to end up doing in terms of how I felt at the time. And he said, yeah, meeting’s done. He stands up, grabbed his sister and they leave the room. And I’m like, what? I mean, that’s not even possible. And so, yeah, I don’t know if I’m not, you know, their the teachers and I’m, you know, dog paddling behind them, hoping to catch up a little bit. But it’s certainly felt like that in my family and it’s been a long time since I’ve seen your daughter. But I know that’s true with you, too. Desiree: [00:33:48] For sure. and my grand kids now are here to teach me more. Yes. And I just follow this little guru that’s three years old around and be present with her and feel better for it. So, I mean, it makes me excited about the future, this is where I could be afraid of the future. There’s a lot of talk of fear of the future, climate change and everything. But if I think like that, I’m going to become depressed. When we focus her attention on what we want to create, Weston: [00:34:19] and you’ve suggested it several times and we will really highlight this very much, is by being present. And by being present isn’t about what happened in eighth grade or seventh grade for me or what happened even last week, its about really creating what we want in this moment. And if we’re going to do that in terms of manifesting or creating of anything, in terms of world peace and or substantial changes to our contributions to one another, as human beings, we really want to be present. Without that, we’re chasing our tails mean we’re going round and round we’re chasing our past, we’re chasing the future, where we’re busy as we can possibly be even more distracted than we’ve ever been. But this thought of becoming present is really, well it’s kinda sleepy. It’s been around forever by the way. Weston: [00:35:07] It’s not a new thing, but it’s really, really cool to just go into that moment and find out what the present moment, where it will take you. Desiree: [00:35:21] Without fear, of the future, or regret about the past. And that’s that’s how we get distracted from the present moment, so easy for us to do that. And that’s why I like the younger generation. I feel when I created my program called Wisdom warriors’ for people over 55, I thought it would be good to just hang out with like minded peers and cook in that soup. But after working with that for a few years, yeah, it was fun. We can talk about dental work and there would be no eyebrows raised you know, I’ve got a bridge and you didn’t. Yeah, whatever. Desiree: [00:35:55] Don’t mention having a crown break to a 30 year old. I realize that we know, I need the younger generation. Desiree: [00:36:05] I need to be stimulated and learn from them. I need to be challenged. Otherwise, I’m gonna kind of settle into, it’s OK that’s the thing about aging. It’s okay not to work so hard anymore. It’s okay not to challenge yourself now. You can just settle back in. That’s the dance I’m doing right now is I’m allowing myself to be challenged by younger people. But using my wisdom, I call it wisdom warriors you know. Weston: [00:36:30] Yeah. No, no, no. I haven’t played tennis for quite a while and fortunately I have not had any injuries of any kind really?. But the flow of the game is as I’ve matured, if I can use that term is to become more efficient. Meaning it used to be I would chase that ball everywhere that it goes, now I still want to do that. But things have changed. And so my interest now is to integrate being at one with the ball, my tennis racket, of course, strangely the court, I mean, you know, the court, the weather, the birds. I mean, literally everything. And then, of course, we have this person that’s on the other side of me acting like a backboard, to kick it back. And regardless of what that activity is, that connection is more fun than the game. So the idea that I’ve become more in tune to the process is, I don’t know, that’s where I’ve been putting all of my attention that it fuels me not to try and do things with the least amount of strokes as we would play the game of golf. But but that is subjective. But to really be efficient with the connection and to me, that comes back to this thought that you’re presenting to us, that by being present, we find ourselves there. So, you know, we can have the hole on one or I can have the ace. And yet I’m onto the next hole at the next stroke. Then if I’m holding onto that, then, of course, I’m in trouble. And that could be that I’ve had a wonderful shot to something much, much less than that. And I think that the practice of yoga is indeed very, very refreshing in that way because it draws us into the process instead of it being an objective that we’re trying to get to. Desiree: [00:38:19] Right. Desiree: [00:38:20] And there’s so many different aspects of the practice. It’s sometimes it’s for restoring yourself like resting. There’s resting yoga and there’s active yoga. And I like the yin and yang of that. Desiree: [00:38:34] I was also thinking about the fact that you’ve never been injured in tennis, which is amazing. As much as aggressively as you’ve played. But sometimes I wonder if, you know, you’ve got tight hamstrings. If you came into a yoga class really seriously and devoted yourself coming to practice, you might start to uncover some places where you didn’t realize were tight. That could be. Weston: [00:38:52] You know, to be honest with you, I started stretching, let me back up. I was encouraged spiritually to start stretching like two years ago. And I thought that that meant a little bit, meaning I was I was going to the gym very aggressively lifting those kinds of things. Fine. But the stretching part was giving it some attention. And the yoga class would be tethered in here and there. And I ended up stretching for a year and a half, pretty much putting aside all of my what used to be normal lifting and running workouts. And that’s not good or bad. This is something I was pursuing. But in doing that, I discovered all kinds of things that I wasn’t aware that I was doing to my body unconsciously. Weston: [00:39:41] And one of the things that I had grown up with was I was exposed to the idea that if we’re going to get something out as in anger or frustration, we go to the gym to get it out because that was a safe place to do it versus, you know, striking or getting involved in something like that. And it made sense to some degree, but I found that it was actually hurting myself, when I say hurting, minor things in the gym and in my stopping to do that to actually become present with stretching, which actually turned into, if you looked at me in the gym, it looks like I’m practicing yoga and for all intensive purposes I’m not practicing positions, but I’m certainly. doing things in an effort to get myself connected back into my body and in doing that I found that there was a lot of things that were repressed or that were trying to be expressed in my body that hadn’t, shall we say, taken the time to see and doing that it was like oh, for goodness sakes. And most of that discovery was fortunately not done through pain where I was forced to do that because of something, but rather I was bringing myself here because, well, I could use the words came by accident to do that, but that wouldn’t be truthful either. But there’s some part of me that knew that I needed to reconnect in that way. And that seems to be unknown. And is really driving me more than ever to be really connected to my body in the same way that we can act ourselves spiritually. And of course this is the whole reason I want to bring this whole topic to everybody, because I think it’s tremendous value that we can really take a moment to become aware of what our bodies are trying to communicate to us. I think you’ve shared something pretty strong in the idea that maybe I haven’t known and maybe I still don’t know some things that are going on. And I think that’s very, very fair as an observer. But of course, you being the teacher that are. That doesn’t surprise me. Desiree: [00:41:32] And if I took up tennis, I would quickly learn where I, you know any time you cross train. That’s why I do weightlifting to balance out the flexibility that I have. I learned so much. In fact when I first started, there were things I could not do. Here I’ve done yoga all my life and I can’t bench press because my shoulders so wacky. So then I had to heal the shoulder. That’s I’m talking about. And because of what I do and all the different types of yoga that I do, I think my view of my aging process is affected in that positive way. And that’s what I want to say to people who are on the fence, they think they should try yoga, but they’re afraid to, is just think about you ten years from now. And back it up. What do you want to be able to do comfortably? You want to be able to get up and down off the floor easily. Do you want to get in and out of a car without grunting. You won’t be able to carry things, you know. Back it up. Because that’s what I’m looking at. Weston: [00:42:28] Yeah, me too. But you know, I have a pretty assertive desire, meaning I wanted to be doing backflips in my 90th year in the assumption that I want to. Meaning I really don’t want my body telling me what I can and cannot do. And that’s probably why I give it the attention that I have, because I’m interested in living a lifestyle that is not limiting to me. No, that’s something I don’t get to control, meaning things can take place within my body and I understand that as it happens with everybody. But I think these are opportunities, instead of them being the end of the road, meaning if something did happen or I have to overcome something, whether that’s emotionally or physically its part of the process. So instead of thinking that I’m done because, you know, I can no longer go play tennis or swing a golf club or whatever else those things would want to be, it becomes a change. And I like that. And I sense that within you, Desiree. And I actually always have. There’s some part of you that’s really flexible, but not just from mechanical, physical, bodily way, but a flexibility that allows you to shift. And my senses, and by the way, I’ve never had the glorious opportunity to have you as my teacher and as a class. But I have a sense that you lead your classes with the ability or the actually conscious desire to shift that, so that that kind of communication is being taught to us. Is that fair to say? Desiree: [00:44:02] That’s what they try to do. I really do. I want this attitude for people. This is, I have a vision of continuing to teach for the rest of my life because I love to share what I’m learning and I keep learning involving, but yeah, exactly how you described it. We may have to learn from some changes that happened and we may have to learn a really hard lesson if we become paralyzed, those of us who love movement, but to not be afraid. I think that’s my biggest message is not let fear stop us, to be more inquisitive, more curious, not let fear stop us from anything, because there’s mountains of evidence behind me, of things that I’ve quote unquote failed at, or not done well at, that could can stop me from moving forward and to ignore the mountains of evidence and keep going forward in the thinking that it can get better. I can learn. I can change. I can grow. That’s that’s how I want to be in the world. Weston: [00:44:56] Me too. And of course, to my last breath. And not because I have to just because its something that really fuels me and it’s contagious, meaning I feel an excitement in connecting to you. And that’s why I wanted to invite you to do what you’re doing. And again, I just want to thank you so much for your your contributions. Just as a person that is able to see that. I’m not talking about what you’re doing here, but literally how you’ve literally touched all of these people all around the world in different capacities. Desiree, it’s truly extraordinary. I just have to tell you that. That sometimes when you’re in that body and speaking to you, you may or may not give that as much as attention. I’m not trying to pump up your ego, but just to tell you literally how much you are offering that contribution by just being you, let alone the formality of the things that you continue to inspire us. Weston: [00:45:47] I think it’s just stunning, to be honest. Desiree: [00:45:51] Thank you. And you’re right. I do forget because I’m in it. You know. I don’t not realize how it looks from the outside world. And that’s also why, you know, I’ve shared my story so many times about losing my son. I shared that in many ways publicly so that others who have had this experience could be inspired because I’ve been inspired by other people who have overcome trauma. Weston: [00:46:14] You know, most of my audience is probably not familiar with that. Desiree: [00:46:18] And if you wanted to give… Sure I like people to know this story because they see a bouncy 60, almost 61 year old granny playing around with her grand kids and doing yoga poses. They’re unreal looking. Weston: [00:46:28] I look like a cheerleader. Let me share with everybody that that’s not true. You don’t look like a granny and you certainly have more energy than most 15 year olds. So don’t try and foul like you’re some old codger coming to the class with a cane, because that’s not true. And that goes for your husband, Andrew, as well. OK. Desiree: [00:46:48] But you know what I mean, is they see as positive cheerleaders, they’ve got it all. Happy marriage, you know. Desiree: [00:46:53] And they don’t know the backstory. Sixteen years ago, my son at the age of 19, no he was 20 and his girlfriend was 19. They were both murdered. They were shot while camping out overnight, celebrating their one year dating anniversary in the Phoenix desert, about an hour north of Phoenix off of I-17. They don’t know that that happened. Yeah. And that I’ve had to grapple with that. And that’s part of my spiritual journey. And it was never solved. The case has never been solved. I’ve had to allow and accept his souls journey can be different than I would have ever wanted and get get back into celebrating life and not being so full of grief. To get my joy back while I even still hold grief, still at the same time. And it’s called synthesizing happiness. That’s what I’ve learned from my study, is when a person has a trauma and then they have to get back in and figure out a way to climb out of that deep well, claw their way back into life, into the light of day. That’s called synthesizing happiness. And that kind of happiness can never be taken away from you because you had to manifest that. You’ve had to make it. It didn’t just befall you. You know. So that’s a long lasting type of, if you will, happiness is such a weird word. But you know what I mean? I do. Abiding joy. Weston: [00:48:13] Yeah. The sense of synthesizing what we might make of the processing is something that we’re, that we achieved per say. And I’ve always said that happiness is a byproduct of our being ourselves. So when we really are ourselves, our true selves, then we find ourselves being happy and peaceful and healthy and kind of nice to be around. So it’s pretty incredible, and yet there sometimes can be quite a challenge or challenges that takes place. I don’t think there’s you know this, Desiree, but we almost lost both of our children in a severe accident less than five blocks from the house. In the accident there were six kids in the car. Both my son and my daughter were there and the biggest trauma happened to my daughter. And she had to have several surgeries on her head because her head had actually hit the asphalt. As the car was turning around, meaning, it spun and rolled over and she hit the asphalt in the process. And it’s amazing that anyone walked away from that. And yet I remember running onto the scene, quite literally, and I don’t know if your familiar with Berry Koffman, or Suzy Kaufman. But they wrote a marvelous book years ago called Happiness is a Choice and something I was exposed to. Weston: [00:49:36] And I remember running into the scene knowing that whatever we have is in this moment, meaning I don’t know what I’m about to see. Weston: [00:49:47] And what I did see was just devastating as a father. And that’s from my children, plus all the other people that were involved in this two car accident or 8 people involved. And yet there’s, I’m going to get emotional about it, something so magical about realizing that these are moments that are not tests, but shall we say opportunities of continuing connection. So the idea that my kids are with me today is something I feel extremely, and extraordinarily thankful for, and yet nothing is going to remain the same, so I think your story is significant and to be honest with you, Desiree, you know, you expressed it quite quickly in the same kind of way that I kind of did almost like we would describe the Titanic going down as scientists. But there was a lot of emotion involved in you know, the idea of loss and how we reconnect to go forward and even the desire to want to participate with ourselves happily, let alone share that opportunity for others. I think it’s, again, truly extraordinary. And I’m thinking of you here. Desiree: [00:51:01] Well, I knew that I had a choice as I learned from watching many other people, as I can either let this take me down or lift me and others up. And that seemed like the only choice to make. And that could have been because I’d only been involved in the yoga practice for so long. That I had learned early on in yoga I learned to take responsibility. That’s the moving from organized religion to Eastern philosophy. But there is no outside God. Right. That the divinity is within. Then I cannot blame or rely on something outside of myself. I need to take responsibility for everything that happens and everything I think about what happens. That’s pretty huge. Weston: [00:51:44] And it takes, I use the term practice, and I don’t mean that like discipline practice, but applied practice because we want to. Weston: [00:51:54] But the beauty of going within and becoming accountable for everything that we’re participating in is really incredible. Weston: [00:52:07] Accountable doesn’t mean that we control, but the accountability is in the idea that I get to choose my perception and that is not happening to me, but rather I’m a part of something versus the separation that we want to continue to create because of the ego mind. And it’s I don’t know, there’s something really, really beautiful about putting an action to this process. And again, its very compelling to others who have or are going through significant changes in there life. I had a guest and she’s a certified yoga teacher as well. She had cancer, a very young woman, and with no background in terms of the family tree having cancer. And yet she was overwhelmed by the yoga community in terms of what they offered her. And not that they wouldn’t, but she wasn’t necessarily expecting that. And yet it was. And by the way, real, not you know, Hi, how you doing type stuff but real depth of connection from people that she, for the most part didn’t know. And that kind of connection is stuff that, you know, brings me to my knees in terms of wanting to be truly touched, because there’s something about that you can feel. And I’m so grateful for all of our connection when we when we offer that with on another. Desiree, can I ask you a question in terms of kind of wrapping it up, would you offer us or would you have like three steps that we could walk away from and putting our body into motion and how that might benefit us in any category that you want to share? Desiree: [00:53:45] Your talking about motivating people to get up off the couch. Weston: [00:53:49] I am. Because, you know, there’s this desire that, you know, it’s January 1st. We want to make a change. And we’ve signed up for the new club, and yet we don’t go, or, you know, we’re not necessarily making a change in lifestyle. Anything from a physical level. So let us hear from you and your experience in terms of how we might be inspired to do three things that would take us in this new direction. Desiree: [00:54:18] Go for a walk, one thing. Get out in nature, that’s so obvious. Everyone knows that they feel when they get out in nature and not on the treadmill inside a gym, but it is certainly different. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And take some time to sit quietly and focus on the breath. Maybe another one that could connect someone, even if it’s with your morning coffee to not be on a device, to be present to that one thing. Breathing in the smell, and the taste of that early morning beverage. That’s the easy one. And then simple stretching or lying down on a rolled up blanket or something to open your heart up with your arms outstretched to get a little upper back opening with your eyes closed with some beautiful music. That would be a simple thing that feels good to bring you into to the moment. And those are the most simple things I can think of, I can think of a ton of more advanced things like I totally gave up sugar. Oh, my God, that’s a life changer. But that’s a big commitment. Maybe people might not be ready to do that. Maybe after the holidays. Weston: [00:55:29] Well, if you get into that, we’ve given up that and then some for personal reasons. Because. But non-health related just because it was personal preference to do something better than what we were doing and believe it or not that’s not so hard when you get past the addiction of week two. Weston: [00:55:50] But you know, Desiree, you have some products, don’t you? That would be helpful to others, too, to make these changes, DVD, etc.. Desiree: [00:56:00] I do. I have a book called Fearless After Fifty How to Thrive with Grace Grit and Yoga. Okay. Available on Amazon and now Kindle and Audible. OK. Many different ways for that. Yeah. And then the other thing is my made online videos for practicing with. Ones on yoga download. Those are great. And also on tint.com which stands for there is no try.com. And that’s all on my website. People can find my name. Spell that for us. Desiree Rumbaugh. Weston: [00:56:38] I just want to let you know on a personal note. I just adore you and certainly your family and I’m just so grateful for you taking the time. And most people listening, don’t know that coordinating with Desiree is a little bit like trying to line up a jet. She’s all over the place, and so coordinating a time was significant. And again, I just want to thank you from literally the bottom of my heart for your presence and your time, and your devotion today. Desiree: [00:57:03] Thank you so much, Weston. I appreciate you just as much. Weston: [00:57:06] Thank you. And I certainly hope to have this opportunity again. Weston: [00:57:16] For us to make true connections, we have to engage. WRITE A REVIEW It only takes a few minutes. 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72 minutes | a year ago
How to be yourself with your family | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 57
Hi, I’mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story How to BE yourself with your family during the holidays Wouldn’t you rather be yourself in your family gathering? (Even if they’re difficult) They can’t be that bad. But maybe they are. Being with your family, especially over the holidays can be difficult. What if you didn’t have to accommodate or be small? What if you could just be yourself? Lunch with Sarah is father (spiritual channel) and daughter straight up talk about how to be with family during Christmas or Hanukkah. Filled with direct questions and wonderful insight of how to enjoy your holiday season instead of enduring it. Click on the above media player or read the full transcript below. (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 057 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: How to BE yourself with your family during the holidays Weston: [00:00:44] Thank you, everybody, for joining me for another Lunch with Sarah. I have my beautiful daughter with me again. So thank you for coming back. Sarah: [00:00:51] Hello. Hi. Thanks for having me. Weston: [00:00:55] Well, my pleasure. And, of course . . . don’t think you know… but everyone kind of liked ya. Sarah: [00:01:01] That’s really kind. I thought so, too. Weston: [00:01:04] But no, they really did. And so thank you for your feedback, everybody, for participation and Sarah wanted to join us again. And she’s going to lead us in another discussion on family. Weston: [00:01:15] Uh oh, is that a good thing? That’s yet to be determined. Sarah: [00:01:22] Well, we were thinking about what we were going to chat about during lunch this week. Yes. And Christmas Holiday Season is upon us. It’s the time of year to be with family. That’s actually my favorite part of this time of year. Getting the time off of work is for me all about being with my family and having the time to see everybody. I’m glad you feel that way. Well, I wouldn’t get too excited about this yet. Sarah: [00:01:50] Just kidding. Sarah: [00:01:51] Okay. I mean, for me, I see my family often. So this isn’t too different from the rest of the year for me. But I know a lot of my friends or even my significant other really only gets to see family on holidays. So it’s a really special time. Although sometimes that can be really intimidating and or bring up a lot of stuff because you’re not seeing family that often. So we could see this backwards actually while everyone else is having gone through this pain once or twice a year. Weston: [00:02:21] Thanksgiving and Christmas, we do it all the time? Sarah: [00:02:25] Does that mean we’re just like numb to it? Maybe. But I think there’s real value in what you’re bringing up. So. Sarah: [00:02:32] Yes, so it just got me thinking, is there something about even the group dynamic of getting everybody together in one room for one day or two days vs. having lunch with your mom, calling your dad on the phone, going to see a movie with your brother or sister? There seems to be something about the holidays where everyone is together in one place that feels like what I would consider, like a Fourth of July of triggers like firework, firework, firework, firework. Sarah: [00:03:08] And even if I go into it feeling really Zen, maybe someone else is lighting off triggers and ultimately something that someone will say, even though I think I have a fine, normal, even good relationship with my family. Sure. That I’ll feel like, I’ll start to feel childish or I’ll start to feel like I need to assert myself or that I need to have my opinion known, or sometimes that I need to fix someone else or, so, or accommodate, or walk on eggshells. Weston: [00:03:42] Right. Sarah: [00:03:42] Oh gosh, that one too. And then you beat yourself up after you leave. I should have said X, Y and Z. So um, This is really good, Sarah. I think it’s an interesting topic. Yeah. Because I think a lot of this stuff that comes up is sometimes conscious. And then sometimes it’s also subconscious. Sarah: [00:03:59] So maybe we can talk about that, too. But let’s just start off by saying, it’s the most wonderful time of the year. Weston: [00:04:11] Well, we all know that you can really sing, so why don’t you try that again. Sarah: [00:04:16] What’s our song that has the Holly? It’s a Holly, Jolly Christmas. Sarah: [00:04:22] That’s more what it’s like for us. But. Weston: [00:04:25] Are you ready to talk about it? I’m set, but can I dig in? Yeah. So the trigger thing in terms of becoming aware that, you know, you can walk into an environment and this environment, of course, is of your past. And when I say past in terms of your birth family, and we have all of these memories and all of these pieces of our experiences that maybe haven’t been processed as a complete. And so when that’s not complete, it’s very, very easy to be triggered. And I’ll just use the word shell, which is referencing the ego or the ego just goes, well, it’s my turn to speak and we need to be competitive based upon how many people are talking at the same time at the dinner table. Yeah. And that I need to be heard. But this is, I think, huge for a lot of people and yet it’s all tied to the past. Sarah: [00:05:16] I completely agree with you. And you were just talking about like the dinner table, which is where a lot of this stuff comes up. But I was also thinking with family. I’ll just talk about me. But I think this could apply to maybe a lot of other people. Is I tie a lot of my identity to my family, because I’m trying to think, how come I don’t necessarily feel the need to assert my ideas, my opinions, my thoughts? I don’t feel the need to tell people how I’ve grown, to even show off with my group of friends, but with my family I do. So I’ll feel like, like here’s my time to show that I’m not, I’m not 32 anymore. I’m 33. And here’s my new ideas, Right. And I’ve grown in the way of X, Y and Z or I’ve opened my mind and I’m wanting to let my family know. I’m wanting to assert myself more and really create my identity with my family. And I’m even trying to, in those family situations, disassociate from my past identity, with my family. And I’m wondering if that’s why some of those triggers more come up with family vs. friends. You know what I mean? Weston: [00:06:38] Yeah, I do. But I think you’re on something really significant. And if I can kind of re-frame that just a little bit. Yeah. Your permission? Our birth families are, of course are our first places where we create, we are, we live or we have a structure created for us and we get used to that structure. Then at one point through our maturing and growing up, hopefully we leave the family. What I mean by that is we go through adolescence, we become a teen and then at one point, there’s a re-identification process in terms of who I am outside of the family, probably the first time that we actually do that. And then as we continue down that path in terms of discovering who we really are, not just what we’ve created or the color of my hair or the color of my eyes type thing. We have a whole other opportunity to become aware. But we’re still connected, slash, sometimes tied, or I’ll even say attached, but not necessarily always in such a healthy way. Some of these memories are of our first family and what you were describing a moment ago. A lot of times is we want to impress Mom and Dad, through the idea this is what I’ve done this year and this is what I’m thinking this year. Weston: [00:07:49] Right. Which you may or may not do with your friends, sometimes you would, but um hoping to get, you know, their external approval, which is low level to their praise. And the worst, of course, would be to announce something that would be stupendous in your eyes, and then suddenly the family casts like a vote. Ooh wee which is 123456, how many members that we have in the family are voting against your idea, or we don’t agree. And that can be like a double hit to the stomach or, you know, right between the eyes. So I think that’s something really important to observe. But the trick, if I can call it that, is to become aware and not necessarily realize that anymore, especially in our spiritual tract, that we don’t need to be tied to these external reflections, inclusive of our families, so that we can really honor ourselves as who we are. And then, of course, our families are the one place, hopefully, that we will really, really be embraced for who we are, not just the experimental parts. Does that make sense? Sarah: [00:08:52] Yeah, it does make sense. I’m having two thoughts when you’re saying that. One is, I’m just going to go with that avenue first. Sarah: [00:09:01] You said in the very end, you said our family should be the place that embraces us for who we are. I know that’s not the case for a lot of people. That’s true. And I think that’s even where a lot of conflict comes from. Weston: [00:09:17] Internal and external. Yeah. OK. So with the family birth family, that doesn’t honor who you are. I’m thinking of a young man that we knew that you went to school with and he made a pretty serious proclamation about his sexual orientation and his family completely rejected him at a very early age. Weston: [00:09:40] And you know who I’m talking about, and get the opportunity for him to do it anyway, not because he was trying to shall we say, piss off his family, but rather just to be who he is, is really, you know, I’ll call it the biggest gesture or the biggest gift that you could ever give yourself. Right. And so while there’s always going be some kind of desire, some secret kind of hope that that person or those people I’m speaking of mom, dad, brothers and sisters and aunts and uncles and however that looks, that they might actually approve or like or really get on board to what you’ve done or who you are. The real truth is you don’t need it. And when I say you don’t need it, you don’t need to force that of those individuals. And in the state of openness, you’ll find that you create it, but not necessarily with the biological family that you came into. And that’s. It’s weird, but it is the coolest thing that you could ever experience. So the family that you’re trying to force, that is your birth family and I’m talking about all the interrelations of that, when we don’t do that, when we just reclaim who we are, and to me in totality, then we actually draw into ourselves as other family like members. And that could be spiritual, physical that literally are participating with us in genuine support of who we are. And then your world changes and then, Sarah: [00:11:05] Can we get just a little deeper into that? Because you’re bringing up really great topics. I want to make sure that we don’t brush over them too generally, Surely. So I think you brought up a great, great example. So let’s say that you’re coming home for the holidays and this year you’re out of the closet. Let’s say you’re coming home and you’re in your mid 30s and you live in the Midwest and you ain’t married yet. Right. And that’s going to be a big issue. Right. Let’s say you’re from a family that really looks at men as achievers, and you go to work. And this year, you lost your job and you’ve been unemployed for a year. Whatever your personal situation is. And you’re talking about your birth family vs. a family that you might create that supports you. But what do you do in situations where you’re spending whatever your affiliation is, Christmas, The Holidays, Hanukkah, whatever? Doesn’t matter. Your time doesn’t even have to be during the holiday season. Right. But your time with your actual family. Sarah: [00:12:12] How do you? Lets just ask the hard question, how do you sit in a room of people that don’t accept you? And, how do you even still feel love for yourself and still feel love for them? Weston: [00:12:27] Well, I guess I think that’s a very valid question, but I think I want to reframe that to what I was suggesting before and now I’m going to say it outloud, which is that’s not important. It wasn’t before. And although its perceived as important, but especially today, it’s just not important to who you really are. So what I’m saying is we don’t need that external approval. I don’t need dad’s approval or mom’s approval or my daughter’s approval about whatever changes or whatever choices that I’m making, even if that’s out of balance with regards to who I really am. And when we detach in that way, it changes something within us. Weston: [00:13:04] Instead of that being an endurance contest where I’m having to be with my family, you know, for this lunch, or this dinner, or this tea, it becomes, and you may hear caustic comments of the past or things that would be would be triggers. And you know what? You just kind of lock them down, out within your own self. This is interesting. That’s even clearer in terms of how my mom thought and does think with regards to what I should or shouldn’t do. Weston: [00:13:33] We talked about that earlier, how family sometimes walks into the room and says you should be doing this. And, you know, that’s a huge trigger for me. Weston: [00:13:43] And, and clearly something that most people would have a trigger to when we’re told what we . . . Sarah: [00:13:49] Yes. Should or shouldn’t do, that I should be living my life the way you’re living your life, because that’s usually what happens with family. Weston: [00:13:57] Well, and what that tells us, again, is think of us having individual shells, slash ego, and we have a family ego. Sarah: [00:14:07] I was just thinking that when you were saying that, that it’s not just about my identity, it’s more the identity that I’m a part of this whole family. And so it’s his whole family identity or ego, Right. That I want to be proud to be a part of, Sarah: [00:14:21] and therefore, it’s really upsetting when someone has really different views from me because I don’t want to be associated with that. And they’re probably thinking the same thing about me if our views are very different. You know what I mean? Weston: [00:14:35] I do. And it’s much like a business, a marketing brand. We’re trying to protect the image of the brand. And, you know, and the brand here is a Jolly Brand. Sarah: [00:14:45] We call our brand, the Jolly Kingdom, and that’s what we toast to every year. The Jolly Kingdom! Weston: [00:14:50] Well, which is true. But we don’t think of ourselves as kings and queens for, say, as much as just,. Sarah: [00:14:56] I do. Weston: [00:14:56] You do? OK. Just a gathering or a group and to be united in that way. But it’s not about having to protect who we are. Weston: [00:15:06] I mean, for example, our image a lot of times, especially this time of year, is that we always have to be happy. Yeah, Jolly happy. Right? And yet we are. I mean, I think we generally are. We’re happy people. I think that’s fair to say. Yeah. But you know darn well we’re not all the time. And that’s something to appreciate it. But no one needs to protect in the Jolly Kingdom, our brand. We can just be ourselves. Right. And if someone comes to dinner or Christmas dinner or any other function. Any other time of year. Weston: [00:15:36] And that we can’t accept that, then that’s something that’s an issue that each individual has to come to their own personal growth or personal development to appreciate and then ultimately say, you know what doesn’t matter? I don’t need my dad’s approval any longer. And when we make that shift within ourselves, it changes everything. Sarah: [00:15:56] It’s so empowering. Don’t you think? Absolutely. And it’s difficult. I understand. I want to make it sound easier said than done. But I do, actually. I mean, I know you’re right, because the ego in the mind is going to make everything seem harder. Right. Than it is. But, you know, I really agree with you, and I think you brought up a great topic. Like there’s always that meme that circulates the Internet this time of year that it starts with Thanksgiving. It’s about like, you know, get ready for Thanksgiving dinner. And that one crazy uncle that talks about politics or that one aunt that’s, you know, a bigot or a religion. Right. Exactly. And I think that sets us up to feel like we all have to think the same to get along. Sarah: [00:16:40] And the truth is, I don’t think we do. I think you could be sitting next to someone that has radically different beliefs or even feelings about things than you do. And it’s not about one person being right or being wrong. Even if I’m really feel like I’m going on a limb saying this publicly. Yeah what? But even if your beliefs, you feel are universally right, do you know what I mean by that? No? OK. So like I believe that love is universally right. Sure. Okay. And I don’t believe that hate is universally right. OK. But in this world, people have the right to love or hate. And we’re watching that play out. Sarah: [00:17:25] We’re watching that more than ever. It’s always been happening. Sarah: [00:17:28] But because of the rise of the Internet and all that, we’re watching it more, and with more transparency. Yeah. And so. So even a dilemma that I’ve come up with or come up to, is, I wouldn’t want to be opposed in my vantage point of love and inclusivity. But if I shut down and judge someone else who is sitting at my same table. This actually happened to me last year, was at a dinner with some friends and some friends of friends. So I didn’t really know everyone that well and someone there was, I never experienced this in my life, someone there was openly racist, and was, and didn’t feel shy or, and straight up said at one point, Oh yeah, I am a little racist and was talking about, and it was so triggering for me and upsetting. Sure. And I started fuming. I had my boyfriend next to me grabbing my hand calming me down, because I was like, I’m going to fly off the flippin handle at this person. I don’t want to be associated with you. And they got up from the table for a minute and I let the whole. I’m even shaking talking about it now. And I let the whole table know I’m not okay with this. That person needs to go back to wherever they’re from, and essentially I found myself in such a conundrum about it because I felt like me completely rejecting them and not even wanting to sit at the same table with them. Is that not the exact same thing that they’re doing to me? Weston: [00:19:06] It is. And, you know, you’re describing some of this. I think it couldn’t be more perfectly timed today in our families, within ourselves and certainly even in our communities. And certainly I have to reflect politics as well, that there hasn’t been a desire to create unity. And this unity has to come from within ourselves. So the idea that someone is having such an horrible thought or belief system, let’s say horrible in terms of how it’s perceived by you to being completely opposite of yours, I think to get back to your universal thought that if you’re really loving, then loving doesn’t mean that you have to endorse them. Right. Or to back them or to be quiet in their presence. But but lovingly appreciate that this is a paradigm that’s taught, that’s all prejudice is, if you really get into it. Right. And then that’s a fear of something that they don’t even know. But that’s presuming that they want to be educated to get out of that. And some people don’t. And so if we can just really appreciate that without necessarily thinking that something, and here’s a keyword, being taken from you see, there’s no need for you to defend that. And there’s no need for you to fear that anyone else at that table is going to think that you’re racist, that you have radical beliefs, what am I trying to say, yeah, racial prejudice. Yeah. Thank you, Racial prejudice. Racial prejudice when you don’t, and that can be said, you know, with charisma or that can be said just plainly, that I don’t really agree with the present view of what’s being talked about at the table, without having to pull out a club and go to war. Sarah: [00:20:47] Well, you know what the real internal battle that happened for me was? I felt like I needed to battle them. I felt like it was the just thing to do. I actually felt extremely guilty for weeks after that I didn’t. And I also felt like I needed to change their mind to be like me. And then I really sat with that feeling for, that was what I came up to a few weeks after. A few months after, it really came full circle to this. I needed to change their mind. Their mind is not who they are. My mind is not who I am. We were just talking about ego and identity. That’s just an ego and identity. It is not who I am. It is not who you are. And I thought if I can accept wherever you are in your life and feel comfortable in my own skin, also accepting wherever I am in my life, we can easily sit at the same table together. And then in our own act of just sitting at a table together, two people who have very different views on things. Isn’t that acceptance? Isn’t that love? Isn’t that the opposite of prejudice? And I had some, I had peace with that thought. It’s really, I think you’re spot on. Weston: [00:22:22] I just would add, just maybe one other word, from, I think of the word acceptance as a portal to coming into that energy, which is very powerful yet needed. And then to continue down that path as a suggestion, I’ll even call it a spiritual suggestion. We get to a place of honor, that we can actually honor that whole dynamic. Their polarity, if I can reflect it that way. But not in the idea that it’s real. Just honoring that their diehard stuck in that belief. And I say stuck, attached to, or firmly committed to. Stuck again implies that they should remove themselves from that belief, and that’s not necessarily the case. And the more that you get into connecting with source, of course, this is all allowed. And this isn’t just, this is a part of the polarity of this dynamic in terms of what we call earth, in terms of light and dark. And, you know, all of those those pieces of binary zeros and ones. So it’s exciting to see that, but without necessarily having to get lost in the idea that it has nothing to do with you. Right. That this whole family dynamic. And by the way, sometimes in that scenario, and you kind of, we talked about this in the beginning, is when we start to accommodate to a family member. Let’s remove our subject matter for the moment and just talk about family. When we start moving into the idea that I’m supposed to accommodate because this is dad or my brother based upon, you know, again, the past, maybe we can change that. Well, we don’t have to accommodate. We don’t have to participate in a role and responsibility beyond just being yourself. And then suddenly there’s not a need to protect yourself socially, again, emotionally and even from a physical perspective. Sarah: [00:24:13] I absolutely love what you’re saying, and I hope that wasn’t a detour. I know it was about the same topic with a different situation in the story. No I think it’s real. Weston: [00:24:21] Because I think, you know, people go into, especially today, sit down and have what should be or could be a very, very beautiful dinner. Weston: [00:24:30] Then something pops out of somebody’s mouth and suddenly there’s a divide in the rooms like, oh, my God, no I’m rage eating. Weston: [00:24:37] Yeah, we need to get to the other side. Rage eating or rage drinking. That’s the worst. Yeah, like that can really add to it, right? Did they really say that? Sarah: [00:24:48] So. Well, I think that’s why. Right? Aren’t alcohol sales like the highest of the whole year this time of year, and don’t you think that’s for a reason. Weston: [00:24:57] I think that has a lot to do with everyone wanting to, part of it be merry. Yeah. And the other part is we want to numb. We wouldn’t go to threat environment, if I’m going to have to be with aunt whomever, and deal with that, then where is that two bottles of wine that always helps me get through this experience.. I’m going to turn down my consciousness a little bit. Exactly. Yeah. So of course that doesn’t work. You just have a hangover and some things, . . . You’ll just deal with it next year. Weston: [00:25:21] Maybe. Right? Sarah: [00:25:25] So we talked about, you know, sitting at a table with people with different views. Yes. Than you. And I’m glad that we could get into that in some more detail, because I think that is much easier said than when you’re actually in that situation. So I’m glad we could get into that in more detail. Something else I’m thinking of, though, too, is this super unique dynamic that happens with family, is they knew you from birth. They know everything about you, and my brother knows how to pick a little teeny tiny scab until I’m losing it. And in the same manner, your family also, I feel like, knows how to make you laugh more than anybody else, because they also know every little thing about you. But the kind of opposite. And I’m not trying to just point out the negative things about family, but I want this to be useful for this type of year, time of year. So let’s talk about history with family, because sometimes in the past I feel like I’ve gotten in a family environment and I revert to being a teenager again or vice versa. Sarah: [00:26:34] I’ve seen other family members. Weston: [00:26:36] Well, you’re lucky because when I do that, I usually become a child. I skip being a teenager and go right to being a kid. And what I’m saying is I feel like I’m three and like I need to protect myself because someone’s hurt my feelings and I need to go back in the back. Sarah: [00:26:47] Right. Sarah: [00:26:47] My mom is like, “Sarah, you set the table” and I’m like, Mom, I’m not ready! Weston: [00:26:55] Yeah. Anything else that used to be the dynamic. And then that includes how the table is set. What things could or couldn’t be talked about as kids, which of course, hopefully is evolving, slash really changing. Right? That we don’t need to do things that we did when we were three, four or five or 15 or 16. Sarah: [00:27:14] The point is. Like we had a joke going on in our family that when we were kids, our mom stayed home with us and she was the best at home mom, and she cooked all the meals. And then when we grew up, me and Grant, you know, we went out, cooked our own meals, successful pre-adult or adult lives. And then we came back home we started to see a pattern that we went right back into, like 16 year old us, where mom cooks all the meals, we play games or do whatever. And, and then one year you’re like, why does that happen? We could all be cooking. We could all be helping. But when we all get together in a dynamic, we all revert back to what we remembered doing in this house. Right. Weston: [00:28:02] And then, of course, I’m not going to speak for Karen. But she could have some real, real strong attachments to that, even quite negatively like it’s her job. Sure. To continue to cook. You know, the big, huge meal. And that would be the planning of it, the execution of it. And of course, it tastes bad or someone makes a comment that something not quite cook properly, then, of course, feel like someone kicked her, you know, through the stomach again. But I think we’re back to roles, responsibilities, and that these roles and responsibilities that we started with is a term we have to address and realize that much, if not all of them. Yeah. Aren’t real men. There’s no such thing. So we don’t need to do that. And so when we go into that pattern, it could be resolved as quick as to saying what are we collectively going to create versus, you know, us coming to your home and suddenly you having to go into the responsibilities that perhaps that you grow with, grew up with or exposed to. And the idea that you have to cook, plan, do other when that could be that of your partner, when he could do all that. Versus it being you. Or we could all bring the food to this occasion as well, right? Sarah: [00:29:14] Yeah. I think a good thing to think about with that is the idea of presence, being in the present. Yes. Because like we said, sometimes family, even a home is like a time capsule. Then you just walk right back into old roles. And I think it’s a great habit just to take a nice breath from time to time. And just be in the now and say, I’m in the present. You don’t have to say it outloud. Sarah: [00:29:43] Yeah, right. Well, you can whatever your thing is. Sarah: [00:29:46] But, you know, anytime you take a breath. I just learned this recently, which is probably old school knowledge to a lot of people. But your breath is neither in the past or the future. It’s always happening right now. So it’s a great reminder when you take a breath that you’re just being in this moment right now and then take your actions from a place of that moment. And that could be part of the cure of.. Weston: [00:30:14] I think it’s not part of the cure, I think its THE cure. Because not necessarily the breath part, but the bringing yourself to balance and being in the . . . I have this this book The Magic of Now, which talks all about just being present. So, yeah, I think that’s tremendously important in terms of that contribution. And I know for myself, I still practice that, meaning even if I’m a dynamic, I will feel something and then I will just allow myself to go. Huh? Interesting. And of course, every time it takes me back to some previous moment and then I have to realize that’s not where I’m at. I’m not two days ago or five days ago or six years ago or fifty five years ago. I mean, however long that is? It’s just not today true. Sarah: [00:31:00] You just said something so brilliant. Which is something will happen. And you mentioned that you take a moment. You take a space. You take a breath. Yes. I think that’s one of the the massive keys to the word trigger. Right The whole idea of a trigger is you pull a trigger. Boom. It’s instant, Right. And it’s out. It’s out. the gun. It’s too late. And taking a moment, realizing that you don’t have to react to everything instantly. Weston: [00:31:27] Yet for me personally, within my personality type. And that’s like Im wanting to use as an identification, but only to describe something. I’ve always had a hair trigger, which is perhaps even faster than a lot of people. So if I barely think that someone’s coming at me with a projectile, yeah, I’ve got to get my gun out and shoot back quickly, really quickly or my ego would have me believe that. And ultimately, let’s just say that hasn’t worked. Not to my favor. I don’t think it would for anybody, to be honest. That’s why I’m talking about it. Yeah. So realizing it and so me slowing that down. Taking a moment takes my finger off of the trigger and realize, OK, this is we’re talking about the shell again engaging in its activities of the past. And how it thinks that its going to get hurt. And no, this is someone making a comment. And if I need clarification. I can just ask. Right. Is this what you really meant? And if someone is really, again, staunchly sharing something that I firmly don’t believe or don’t have association with. It’s OK. I now understand, but I don’t need to protect myself from it. Sarah: [00:32:36] I think that’s brilliant. What you just said. I feel like a lot of conflict, not even between two people, just inner conflict comes from your own perception of what’s happening versus what’s actually happening. Because. If there’s three people in a room, three people are going to describe an event completely differently, right? It’s true. So when you’re constantly living off of your own instant triggers of, you know what, uncle Uncle Jack does this every year and he hugs me for one second too long and it’s inappropriate and I don’t like it. And I always knew that about him. And. Sarah: [00:33:17] Maybe that was a bad example. I don’t know. For all I know, that’s the truth, and you have a creepy uncle. Sarah: [00:33:24] But maybe Uncle Jack is really like a thoughtful, loving guy and just gives long hugs and he’s never thought a thing of it. And you’ve thought your entire life that he’s conscious of this. He’s conscious of doing X, Y and Z. Or my you know, my sister, or my mom is conscious of saying, oh, I like your hair or oh, are you doing your hair different? Sarah: [00:33:51] And every year I take that as, oh, what the F? You’ve never, you’ve never accepted me for who I am. Right. And maybe they were just really asking, Oh, are you doing your hair different? Weston: [00:34:00] Let me turn this back just a little bit to the inappropriate uncle cause I think that has some value. Yeah. One, I think that we are in a space where we need to slash have to, observe those things clearly, which is to say if someone is doing that truly innocently, meaning without any need to objectify that into any kind of formal inappropriate behavior, even then it’s appropriate today to let that person become aware. Totally. But what I want to do behind some of this in terms of someone, saying something so blatant as I’m racial and I’m going to come to the dinner table and talk about that. I think that’s really easier to something that may be a little more challenging. And if you don’t mind, I’ll bring it up. It’s the energy. Yeah. Where we feel an energy that someone didn’t or did say something. But we can feel an energy like, well, it’s happening. I can feel it. And we’re starting to build up and we’re about to go to war for something that hasn’t been said. And I think that we need to recalibrate ourselves. I’m speaking of each of us individually to be again present instead of thinking about what happened previously, that somehow this is going to be a cannon. Because isn’t the first thought you have when you start getting your little internal army together is you think. . . Sarah: [00:35:21] This happened last time. I know for me, that’s what I was. Sure. or I think this has happened before. Right. Where I say to myself. I recognize this behavior. When I say recognize it, it always means the past. Right? Right. I’m not here. I’m not now. I’m not sitting in this room present with you anymore. I’m completely living off of old information. Correct. Weston: [00:35:41] And so I think we need to recalibrate, the information that is coming forth. I think the reason I brought up the energetic piece, I know that the more true that we are to ourselves, we become further aware with what we call the kind of vibrations or energy that you want to surround yourself which sounds kind of odd, but that may include your family members. I’m talking about your birth family members and it may not. And so instead of denying that or pretending or having to get drunk to go through it, it becomes an opportunity for you. Go. Okay. This is a part of my DNA past, this is a part of my physical past in terms of them knowing all of these details. Yeah, but it may or may not describe again the true me, even though that they have all these physical details. So these are opportunities to really, really not force them, but to have really some tighter connections. Even if someone is under capacitated, Yeah. unwilling or then the opposite. Then we should talk about that from a positive perspective that we can literally come together and really harmonize like people… Having a better connection than you’ve ever had. Weston: [00:36:47] Yes. Yes. Weston: [00:36:48] And instead of thinking that, oh, my God. You know, my brother is coming to town and this is what we’ve always done. And I think, I don’t think. I know that when we change these stories within ourselves, it changes an energy. And then suddenly, guess what? It doesn’t show up in the form of the radar in our families or interconnections. And now we’re experiencing something better than we come away from the experience going, huh? That actually went pretty well. Yeah. And, you know, if you’re taking, you know, your would be partner to such an event. You may sing that to relief as you drive away. That went pretty good. And he was like, well, what are you talking about? I thought it was phenomenal. And you, again, are still comparing to something of the past to make that comment. And he’s saying that it was a nice evening. Sarah: [00:37:33] Yeah, absolutely. Okay. So we’re talking a lot about being in the now. Being in the present. Weston: [00:37:39] Yes. The magic about. Sarah: [00:37:40] Exactly. I was just thinking that. Do you have some tips or pointers or anything that you do or suggestions that you have to either, that you would maybe do to prepare for an event, a family gathering? I guess even by nature of that, it wouldn’t be in the now anymore. But, or more importantly, when you’re there, when you’re feeling triggered, when you’re in the moment. Sarah: [00:38:06] Because I don’t believe that you need to be meditating all the time to be in a Zen place. It’s more important not to be in a cool, chilled out spot in the middle of chaos. And do you have any thoughts or tips on how to do that? Weston: [00:38:21] I do. So I don’t think that, I think meditation is a wonderful tool, but I don’t think that we want to be in a meditative or unemotional space 24/7. I don’t think that’s, maybe that could fit for some people, but maybe not necessarily everybody. Yeah. So we don’t want to choose that. So in a precognizance of coming into an event that maybe perceiving a challenge, I would just remind yourself that, one, we’re going to employ some of the tools that are quite literally listed in the Magic of Now Booklet. And again, I’m referencing that, I hope everyone goes and downloads it. Sarah: [00:38:55] Yeah, maybe link it in the podcast. Absolutely. Yeah. Weston: [00:38:58] But the thing that I would say before that would be just realized is one really simple thought and this is really key before we get to being the moment and that is, before you go into a family gathering, instead of thinking you’re going to get hurt. Weston: [00:39:15] What happens when I present the idea that you can’t, you can’t get hurt? And if you really hear that. Yeah, it changes everything. Sarah: [00:39:27] Can I ask you a direct question? Yeah, please. My instant thought is I absolutely can and I could list the times and places that that’s happened. Weston: [00:39:37] Right. Which only illuminates that you are choosing to create those states of separation. And that’s something that’s always going to put you in a perpetual challenge, slash civil war within your own self. And then clearly with other people as well. Sarah: [00:39:52] So can you dive into that concept a little bit further of you can’t get hurt? Weston: [00:39:57] Yes. First, you know, we should probably back it up even more further, which is to really understand that everything is a choice. So I should’ve said that probably first. So we need to know that we are empowered to choose that I can get hurt or I can’t get hurt. But once we choose and we exercise ourselves in this idea that we can’t get hurt, that’s not through protection. It’s just an absolute truth. I can go and sit around a bunch of people who have different ideas than I do or who drink and eat things that I don’t eat, or conduct themselves in a series of activities that I would never allow myself to do because it wouldn’t feel balanced to me, without me feeling. And please let me emphasize that with italic bolds, feeling, that I can get hurt, because if I don’t feel that I can get hurt, it changes my dynamic. So imagine going into your family, which is what, three times a day. When we go into the family dynamic meetings and lunches and teas, and everything, that you are just being yourself without the idea that you’re going to be hurt. Weston: [00:41:07] What it does is kinda like red carpet literally to you being present in the moment. See if you come into this gathering with the idea that we’re going to war. Weston: [00:41:15] You know, we need to stop by the surplus store and get nuclear submarines and grenades. And camouflage behavior. I mean, you’re going to create what you don’t want. Weston: [00:41:26] And so if you come into this without the idea that you can get hurt, which means the empowered concept that you are choosing not to get hurt, then when someone launches a rocket towards you, it’s like, okay, interesting. And of course, what they’re really doing is showing you about how they feel. That doesn’t have to be something that you engage in. Sarah: [00:41:48] Now, I think I’m following you now, that if you’re, if I’m truly staying in the present moment, my hurt, if I’m being totally honest, really comes from the past. Bingo. I start thinking about, and the past doesn’t exist. It doesn’t exist in the now. It only exists in my memory of it. Right. And again, as we are discussed, three people sitting a room, all remember something different. Weston: [00:42:10] So did it even really happen? But watch us because you don’t have kids yet. But, so let’s take your would be kids bring them to the family gathering. Yeah. And if you take your past with that and that of your partners, you’re going to start doing what? Protecting your children against the evils of family A and family B based upon the idea that once upon a time you got hurt. Right. And all of a sudden this teaches the family, I’m speaking of your children, the very thing that you don’t want. You say, well, we’re going to your grandparents house and therefore get on your lead aprons, because this is what we should expect. Weston: [00:42:43] And the kids, your kids have a completely different perspective of that, which is, of course, very healthy for them. Very healthy for you. And ultimately, you see this for what it is. It’s the evolution that the whole family dynamic gets to create if they’re willing and want that. And so we don’t need to be stuck or harassed or changed to where we’ve come from, as much as just appreciating that this is what everyone does. We all have a family of sorts in one form or another. And as we come together and we are choosing to be present. Then in the moment, now if I can return to that part of the question. The first thing that I will do is I will literally first attune myself, which means create an assessment. Am I in balance? Weston: [00:43:31] Okay. Because if I’m not in balance, I know that I’m going to have an imbalanced reaction. I’m gonna get mad because I’m looking to get mad. So you’re starting by creating an awareness? That’s right. Am I in a balanced space? And if I come into this energetically, like, oh, I don’t know. Then I realize, okay, I’m not energetically pure space, which means I’m likely to be tipped over or moved into a state of imbalance. Let’s just assume that that’s what I chose. And so I’m an imbalance state. Now what do I do? Yes. Know what do you do? What you just did a moment ago in terms of taking a breath, which is taking a moment could be done like that. Sometimes I may feign going to the bathroom, which is to say I’m going to create a little mini break like we would take a timeout in a football game. Timeout. I’m going to go to the back. Or timeout. The kids need something. And I say grandkids or, Time out we’re going to take care of the dog. We don’t say that out loud, or I left something in the car and all I’m trying to do is regain my composure, when I say composure not to go to war. Right. But to be in a balance state again. And when I do that, by the time I walk to the car and come back again to get whatever, a piece of gum, I now am back in a balance state and I don’t have to go into that retaliatory energy. Does that make sense? Sarah: [00:44:51] Absolutely. Another trick that I have been using recently is I do it by listening, which is an excellent way for me personally to stay present in the moment. I find that a lot of my triggers happening are happening when someone else is talking to begin with. And so instead of preparing my battle against them or my internal positioning against whatever they’re going to say, I’m no longer listening to them anymore. I’m now in my own mind with my own thoughts and my history. I’m projecting to the future I’m not in the now. So instead, I tell myself I’m going to be really present. I’m going to challenge myself to be exceptionally present right now. And I’d take a breath while they’re still talking. It’s so easy to do because you don’t need to create aloneness or individual space. You can still remain a part of the group. Take a nice deep breath while looking right into their eyes. And I’ll tell myself. Be right here in this moment. Or if I can, I can even take a moment to observe my own mind or my own presence. So if my mind is like. Flipping, no way that I feel the same Dadada, then in that breath. I’ll take a moment to even observe that my own mind is having that reaction and in that moment of observation. I don’t even know how to explain it in words. I feel completely calm. And then when it’s my turn to speak, I’m able to speak from a place of presence and even a lot of times everything gets worked out without saying anything. Right. I don’t know how to explain. Yeah. what happens in that practice. But thats just was just something that I wanted to add in too. Weston: [00:46:41] Oh, that’s beautiful! You know, I’m going to share this. This is quite personal. But, your birth family conditions you. And that’s not a bad thing. It’s a part of the human experience at the same time. We do want to re-evaluate those things that we get exposed to, let alone those conditions and to create maybe something new that serves you. So I’m going to speak to something that was conditioned to. Yeah, with my mom, she was extremely argumentative with intention to fight. And so therefore, I would feel the energy first and that. OK, we’re about to go into war. Yes. Which is to say everyone needs to go get their boxing gloves on, Two, I would start my thinking would go quickly like I would, you know, my adrenaline goes up and all my abilities to go into this, you know, intellectual or emotional boxing ring is being raised. And three, I’m trying to anticipate her moves. Right. Exactly like you would playing tennis or playing baseball or basketball. Meaning I’m trying to see what the other players are going to do before they do it so I can get a proper position to block the shot. Yeah. And so. I noticed, unfortunately, that all of that conditioning was something that brought into most all my relationships, especially with my family. Yeah. So if I see somebody dribbling in a certain kind of way, that reminds me of way back when slash M O M, then my mind goes, all boy hears it’s common and you know what? That’s not listening. Yeah. Has nothing to do with listening. Now I’m back into 19, whatever it was, and I need to really, really be focused on here. And when I do that with family members and feel that none of it was my mom. Thank God for that. Weston: [00:48:28] It changes our opportunity to be present. Yeah. Weston: [00:48:33] And then suddenly I’m seeing a whole host of opportunities. And it’s not just the words or the topics. It’s, again, the energy. And even if we’re not matching that energy, we don’t have to. We can actually have that experience and realize that it was delightful in it’s own way. Maybe not necessarily where we go the same movie and we all bobble head that was the best movie we’ve ever seen. Speaking of our would be dinners with one another, but it’s something. Sarah: [00:49:02] Pretty cool, transformational, I think there’s so much peace and joy in presence. Yes. And I’m with you, it’s like turning on a light and, it well its going to sound biblical. I don’t mean it to, but it dispels darkness. Yes. Sarah: [00:49:17] And so even if what like, you’re saying everyone doesn’t agree. We don’t all go see the same movie and laugh at the same spots in it. Sure. You find that that’s just such a natural separation. Someone who just won’t join you in your presence just naturally is like, I’m going to go talk to Uncle Ted instead. Perfect. Right. Or it’s also an awesome invitation. If that’s within the other person and maybe they’re just got on an old track, you know. Yeah. Sarah: [00:49:44] And they’re rocking around their Christmas tree around and round and round and they’re tired of hearing the same record. Sarah: [00:49:49] And you present now this new presence in just energy. You don’t have to say I’m being present now. This is me. You know, that would just be our ego and our individualism. This is me now. Respect me. Sarah: [00:50:04] But that energetic invitation often invites someone else. And if that’s on the inside and that’s something that they’re interested in, I have found it just flips conversations. Weston: [00:50:14] You know, Sarah, everybody knows this. And and you know this like the back of your hand. But. Unconditional love when we feel it. And we actually express it, is something that transforms all of us. Yes, it takes being present and participating in this love. Weston: [00:50:38] Outside of the perspective of William Weston Jolly, my full name or yours, you know, Sarah JoAnne Jolly, and it changes everything because we’re, we have a true understanding through this connection of love. And that illumination is stunning. That’s why I talked earlier about going from acceptance to a state of honor. We can actually have this unbelievable honor for this person of the family that is triggering everybody with some horrific comment. Sarah: [00:51:11] I was just going back to that too, the beginning of our conversation. Yeah. And thinking, you know, the biggest thing is in your presence, like what we’re talking about now, love and be able to honor when you first said you even get to honor that person. I thought no. Sarah: [00:51:30] I thought, you know, some things you hear anything that sounds really nice, but I think about actually doing it. And I thought about that, and that person, and I thought, no, no, but maybe at some point in the future, you know, because what we’re talking about now is, is being in your now in your presence. Sarah: [00:51:50] Right. Versus trying to understand the mind. And you’re never going to understand. It’s really is for lack of any other term, it’s a dysfunction. And, and when you’re living, when your mind, your mind is always doing its best is like a kernel. It’s always trying to protect you and it’s protecting you off of what you’ve seen in the past, off of what you can predict in the future. And it can become dysfunctional so quickly, as we’ve even seen. And again, not to get political here, but with past events and wars and such like that. But to try to understand the mind and accept someone else’s mind when it’s living in dysfunction is going to drive you completely insane. But to separate like we’re talking about breathing and observing even your own mind. Right. To breathe and observe and say this is someone else’s mind. I don’t need to judge it. It’s not my place. It is what it is. But when you can separate the person’s mind from the essence of who they are. Is that what you’re talking about? I am. That that’s love and honor. Weston: [00:53:00] It is. It’s an unconditional love. And then if you really go past that, then, you know, from a psychic perspective, you can see what who trained them, who conditioned them, that they’re regurgitating these things that they may or may not actually believe. Right. I mean, they may fight to the death, literally. That this is what they believe. But if you see that teaching. I’m talking about just that first generation their moms and dads, and or maybe the community at large during that era, you know, the 50s versus the 60s versus the 70s eras. And then if you go back up the family tree and go, huh, interesting. This whole family tree is for participating in something that is, shall we say, sideways at best in terms of it being truly aligned with source. And yet that’s a part of it. And yet when we see that, it’s like, OK, well, maybe that person truly evolved compared to great great grandfather Edward, you know. Right. But at the same time, we don’t have to. And this is, I think, a huge point, which you’ve said that we don’t have to understand. I mean, we don’t need to get lost in trying to understand or create 16 textbooks of why the family tree has, you know, 16 generations of serial killers in them. I mean, we don’t need to understand that. And when we break out of that, need to understand, we actually break the cycle. And man, that that changes everything. Sarah: [00:54:20] Exactly. And I’m not and I wasn’t using the word dysfunction like a judgment just an observation of something that doesn’t need to be understood, exactly what you’re what you’re saying. Yeah, stop trying to understand something that is. Sarah: [00:54:40] Crazy and again, that could sound like a judgment word, but it’s just it doesn’t need to be understood. And the only reason I think my mind feels it does need to be understood is so I can protect myself. Right. And so it goes right back into my mind is a great warrior and good for you, you little samurai. Sarah: [00:54:57] You know what? That’s not that’s not the life that I want to live. Right. Right. I want to. That’s not a life of peace. Yeah, exactly. Sarah: [00:55:03] You know, and that’s why I think it’s so cool that we’re having this chat around the holidays, because it’s the time of peace and joy and love. And it doesn’t matter your religion or your faith or that seems to just be a feeling in the air this time of year. Yes, it is. Which I love. Me, too. And I think it’s really cool because that feeling in the air brings up this juxtaposition within us that we’re trying to figure out how to get to that place of peace and joy. And it can be challenging sometimes when you get into the nitty gritty of it. But I think you really nailed it on the head. Weston: [00:55:37] Well, I think you’ve got something to just that this thinking can, of course, go beyond the holidays. Meaning we don’t have to just be in this very, very celebratory, very loving, very generous mood just during this time frame. We can do this maybe a lot more than that. And just because. Yeah. And I’ll say just because because it’s fun, to be honest with you and God, this is unbelievable. And there’s a an enjoyment that we have each time that we get to come together instead of it being based upon something that happened previously. Sarah: [00:56:14] Yeah. Thats a huge gift, is the moment. Weston: [00:56:17] It is. It’s just the giving, the receiving and honoring that it’s just as joyous to receive as it is to give without having to account for that, without having to keep a . . . Weston: [00:56:31] Ok. I gave you one. You gave me one back. I mean. Yeah. Weston: [00:56:33] Like a Ping-Pong game. We can let go of all that and truly unconditional love. And I think that’s really cool, too, Sarah, that as we would give to a particular person, they may or may not actually give us back, quote, this present or this gift, or they might even not acknowledge it. It’s OK because we know that the universe will, and. Exactly. we don’t even have to do that conditionally. You just know that that’s just a part of how it works. And that knowledge to me is extremely transformational. Sarah: [00:57:03] That’s really, really beautiful and really like a pleasant thought to even just sit in. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. That was like being at a spa. Weston: [00:57:12] Yeah. Yeah, it is. I mean you just you want to soak all the way through. So that you can. Yeah, that’s I mean. Yeah I know. I know. That’s exactly. That we can really, really feel it. Weston: [00:57:23] And not just to hear those words but really practice it within ourselves. And then when we do with our families and and some of us come from healthier families than others and some of those families are so dysfunctional that maybe we’re not in interchanging during this time of year. But nonetheless, all of its OK. Sarah: [00:57:42] So the big takeaways. This wasn’t meant to be a promo for the Magic Of Now, but go download the Magic Of Now. These links are going to be in the podcast notes. Sarah: [00:57:58] And if we have time, I do have one more question, please. Go, go, go, go. OK. It’s probably you’re probably gonna say the same thing that we’ve been touching on this whole time. Weston: [00:58:06] You never know, sir. Exactly. Sarah: [00:58:09] And that is we have been talking about our own families. Yes. This whole time. What if you’re going to spend time with your significant others families and the dynamic of that? Or maybe even feeling like you’re your partners your best friend. And when they get around their family, who the F are they? Sarah: [00:58:31] And I can’t wait to get home and get back in our own house. And I can be around you again because where did you go? Sarah: [00:58:38] And I just wanted to kind of open up that topic. I guess it’s not a super detailed question, but I won’t open up that topic with one… Sarah: [00:58:46] How do you support your partner and how do you still be present and in the moment and enjoy your own holiday when maybe when you feel like your partner does regress around their family, Sure, that can lead you to be feeling a little alone. Sarah: [00:59:03] So I guess I kinda of threw a bunch of questions at you at one time. Weston: [00:59:05] No no no. Well let me kind of simplify it a little bit if I can. Number one, congratulations, because of it’s not your family there’s always his perception. It’s so much easier if we’re going to their house, not my house. Weston: [00:59:17] And so I’d liken that to the going in a car where you get to sit in the passenger seat, Yeah. and your just going along for the ride. And the reason why that becomes easier is because you’re not attached. Sarah: [00:59:27] Because you like. I’m just here for the eggnog, baby. Oh, I hate that stuff. Weston: [00:59:32] Anyway, sitting in the passenger seats means that you’re not attached to their family. But watch this. If you’re attached to your partner. Exactly. Then their reaction being, shall we say, negative around their own family tree is going to cause this shall we say issue between the two of you. You guys may have an argument coming away from his family based upon the idea that he’s infuriated because someone said whatever they said. Sarah: [00:59:57] Oh, I was just watching a holiday movie last night, Four Christmases with Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon and they never spend the holidays with either their families and they get looped into it. And this like comedy, whatever. And they have to go to four family Christmases. And they both turned to each other in the very beginning. They go, no matter what happens, do not let them come between us. Sarah: [01:00:19] And of course, by the end, they’ve completely broken up. And this whole thing. And I feel like that’s a very real situation for couples where you’re like, don’t let them come between us. But that’s exactly what you’re talking about. Weston: [01:00:29] It is in a slightly different way, because we don’t want to be attached. So if your partner is going through something while he goes to his family and you get the quote unquote right along again, this can be easier for you as you might perceive it. Then onto the fact that he’s working something out, meaning that he gets to practice what you were practicing when you come to our family and he gets to ride in the passenger sit. Going huh. Interesting. Meaning, it’s very different, but very healthy. Because when we, when we, let me make that example, when you go to his family and participate in that space, you get to observe their patterns, of course, which is, you know, the particulars of that particular family. But what’s really important is realizing, huh, I don’t have to engage in any way this not me, meaning I might be myself. And and if your partner actually understands that and begins to apply that based upon, I’ll call it your leadership energetically at the very least, and then perhaps even in the way that you’re connected. I saw that you get along with my dad just fine when I think he’s a blah, blah, blah. And then suddenly you’re actually showing your partner how to engage with his own family in a way that he never made consideration to do before. So that becomes, I think, super powerful, very, very cool. And that can be fun without having to be a, you know, a minefield of trip wires. You know what I mean? Sarah: [01:01:48] Well, yeah, so your saying basically make your own experience out of it. Absolutely. Weston: [01:01:51] Yeah. And I think you said something magical, too. I think that needs to be double underlined. And that is that your household, and I’m speaking of your and your partner’s household should be completely and utterly different than that of your family and or his family. Right. And ultimately we want to take that no matter where we go. Yeah. We dont have to move the house into the in-laws family in terms of, you know, whatever household were going to into. But rather you guys are yourselves and with that. Cool. And guess what happens? We are either going to accept you as a couple in terms of that new entity or have a problem with or just acknowledge that this is the way that you guys do it. And ultimately, from universe’s perspective. By far the easiest thing for you to just choose that. Now, I think we help one another when we when we do that. So when you get to sit in the passenger seat, you could help your partner by being yourself with those family members and by the way, you’re gonna hear the stories, as I’m sure you already have in terms of wea
21 minutes | a year ago
Secrets of Gratitude | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 56
Hi, I’mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that… “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…” My Story Secrets of Gratitude Real benefits of being thankful. The secrets of gratitude is actually a life force. Perhaps you haven’t thought being thankful is a force of energy, but it is. Authentic gratitude connects us to our Higher Self and Source. Using the process of thanksgiving is much than any given holiday. If you apply yourself in continuous gratitude you’ll see that it changes you and everything around you. Would you believe me that being thankful makes everything easier? There are many reasons why. Read or listen to Secrets of Gratitude so that we might further our connection. Let me say, I’m very grateful for you… (HIT PLAY and LISTEN to True Connections with Weston Jolly podcast) Thank you for joining us for this podcast Episode 056 of True Connections with Weston Jolly Transcription: Secrets of Gratitude Can I share something personal? I’d like to thank you. There’s a possibility that you won’t understand or hear me. Regardless, I’m very grateful for you. I’m not interested in offering you a general platitude of thanks — this is personal. I don’t need or want anything in return, I genuinely want to share my thanks. You’d think that this would be easy but sometimes it isn’t. It’s easy to say thanks but you may question any such motives because maybe someone along the line has previously used gratitude as some kind of bait in which to snare you. I’m sharing my gratitude for you because of your presence. This may not initially make sense, but I hope to share in detail as to why I have such gratitude for you. You and I are connected. And I’m so grateful that we are! I’m sharing the real secrets of gratitude because it makes me happy. If there’s any selfishness in my being glad to connect with you this I freely admit. I’m happy because you may not remember the reason that we are syncing up, but I do. I’m delighted because I’m hopeful you will allow me the opportunity to share with you the reasons we’ve come together, and most of all, I get to share the real secrets behind this gratitude. In context of what I deeply desire to contribute, we have to first appreciate the odds of our being together in this same moment. You could be anywhere doing anything but instead you’re here –right here — with me. If you’re thinking I’m referring to the idea that you’re here with me in listening to this podcast, then let me open up the doors. There are more stars in this Galaxy than your mind can comprehend. And your mind can’t possibly conceive the total number of stars in this one part of the Universe. Neither can mine. And yet here you and I are —together. You have chosen to incarnate on this third planet orbiting the Sun to participate in your current embodiment of you. As a fellow soul adventurer, I’m in awe that you’ve come. As you may have already figured out, the heaviness of being limited to mind and flesh can be hard on occasions. There are times it can feel pretty uncomfortable and challenging being here. For some reason, it doesn’t take that long to actually believe that everything here is real when in fact it’s not. It’s all an illusion. It’s like a game. A virtual game that we all pretend is real when in fact none of it is. That is except one thing. The single exception is you. You’re real. Not your body or mind but the core or soul of who you really are. And again, you’re here! I keep saying that but what does it really mean? In being a part of humanity, we share this collective experience with every other being that has ever come to this planet. In perspective, you and I are sharing a very unique struggle with the very first souls that have come to exist here. Allow me to use the fictional story of Adam and Eve to create a basis for a metaphor. You and I are walking around the very same way that Adam and Eve did. Every incarnated human shares this same experience. But there’s a perceived difference if we don’t do it at the same time. Consider this example, Disneyland was opened on July 17, 1955. To date, over 726 million people have visited the first theme park and the numbers are still growing. But have you and I ever visited Disneyland on the exact same day? Have we ever visited the park at the same time? Have we ever ridden the same rides together? Over a 100 billion people have inhabited on earth and you’re one of them. We all share an incarnation on Earth, in the same way we’d visit any other theme park. But there’s a difference in what day and time we attend the amusement park isn’t there? I didn’t meet Adam and Eve but I know they didn’t have houses, cars or cell phones. They probably didn’t ride horses, hunt or eat meat. I can imagine they did befriend animals in the Garden of Eden but not how we would do it today today with a collar or a leash. There was a co-existence. That’s the word I’m looking for, co-existence. We all have co-existed on planet earth but not at at the same moment in time. This is a good thing. Your time here is shockingly different than your grandparents. Even more drastic is the difference is comparing the lifestyle, time, era and world of your great-grandparents. Pretty cool right? Yet here you and I are, together, riding the same ride at Disneyland at the exact same time. I’m super grateful about this. Let me further explain why. You were invited. You and I agreed on some higher level to be here together. You didn’t have to come. You could have stayed home. Not bothering with all the hassles of coming into your body. But you did. This is only one reason why I’m grateful. It’s very significant that you’re here consciously and on purpose. I’m super grateful! You may think that you don’t recognize me as we step onto the same boat at the Pirates of Caribbean ride at Disneyland but you’re here. You came! I am even more grateful that you might further recognize this connection. You know what this means right? You’re not alone. You’re not the only one in the theme park wandering around trying to find your family. Yes, your family brought you in but they may or may not be awake. Did I say that? I’m so grateful that you’re awake! Yes, you may still have sleep in your eyes and maybe you’re still yawning and scratching as you get up, but you’re here! And it’s also very likely you’re totally awake and ready to play. We come together in so many diverse ways. But first, how can I help you? I’m grateful to be of help. I was asked last night, during a personal session; Who mentored you? I answered, “physically I didn’t have a mentor.” The young woman seemed shocked and immediately said, Well, I’m glad you’re here. This is was a special moment. I’m not often asked such a question and she was offering me her gratitude as she had no clue, physically speaking anyway, to the topic of this podcast. Isn’t that amazing? I’m in such gratitude. This is why it’s personal. I’m glad you’re here! I’m super glad that we’re connecting and sharing on this level. There’s something about being here at the same time and also knowing that we’ve come here to participate in something greater than riding It’s a Small World at Disneyland. Do you know what I mean? Let me share with you more about some more secrets of gratitude. While it’s enough to just be present there’s much more to the invitation. You have a part to play. Your being here right now is a magical moment. It’s too why I wrote the free booklet the Magic of Now. (And if you don’t have a copy make sure you grab one.) I’m in gratitude that you’re free. Can I characterize this? No matter where you are, what country, relationship, family or even your body you are free. This freedom is not for everyone in the physical realm yet it doesn’t matter because your true essence is free. I’m in gratitude for this too. I’m exceedingly grateful to be free. For example, imagine being free of doubt. What if you didn’t have to employ any, as in ANY, doubt any more. What if you used your awareness to get past searching and wondering in all the disconnected spaces? What if in freeing yourself from doubt you could take yourself to the next level in realizing that there’s nothing to fear. I’m grateful to be talking about that. Living without fear is a state of abundance. It’s what living free really means. Can you live freely? Of course you can. It’s much easier than you think and it happens the instant that you reclaim it. To be free can feel uncomfortable if you’ve gone too long thinking that you’re not. I’m thankful that you can change anything that you want. I’m thankful that I have free-will choice too. Finding your balance is freeing isn’t? I hate spinning in circles. It makes me feel dizzy, nauseous and very comfortable. So, should I need your help in coming off the Mad Tea Party cups (A Disneyland Fantasyland ride) I’m grateful for you to recognize my discomfort and share your steady hand in helping me reclaim my balance. Would I offer this balance and energy for you? Of course! And we don’t need to be in the same room, state or country for us to do it. This is part of the magic of now and I’m super grateful for the power, inspiration and love that we can share with one another at any time that we want. This is how we collaborate. I’m thankful for women, yes women, who naturally work-together in harmonious ways that is so opposite of men. I’m also grateful for men’s energy of competition as it allows me to see the results of the struggle with something outside of my real self. Without my Shell, or ego, and it’s desire to promote separation, it might be harder for me to see within because I wouldn’t have this wonderful contrast. Is this the reason we have minds that distract us from our Divine self? If so, I’m thankful. I’m grateful for every opportunity that I have to see myself in you. I sometimes don’t like what I see, and there are times I act like a child, crying, yelling or isolating myself because of what you share with me. I love that you’re strong enough to love me anyway and that you haven’t succumbed to my throwing fits, name calling or trying to get you to believe that it’s your problems or issues when in fact they’re my own. I’m so thankful for the children. Every child or even new born animal reminds me of the innocence that everything is possible and life is just beginning. I’m so grateful for these reflections that sometimes I wonder how I’ve made everything so complicated when it’s really so simple. This theme park isn’t real. It’s only a game. I’m grateful that we share and connect through language, math, music and creativity. I wish we could do this more peacefully but I do know that you, and others, are only reflecting what I have not wanted to see within myself. I promise to observe myself more truthfully and to continue to choose the freedom that comes from my being in balance. I have to say I’m also grateful for the times I have chosen to be out-of-balance. As much as I would like to say all these days of imbalance are done, this isn’t true. There may be days that I want to be imbalanced and as a consequence… I’m warning you so that you step back when I’m again wobbly of my own self imposed choice. I’m grateful too that you see me whole, in the same way that I see you as whole. I don’t need to fix anything in you and further you don’t have to agree with any of my perceptions within my personality. Thank God, you are not a perfect mirror of me as there’s a part of me that thinks this is too much. But I’m especially grateful for those of you who see me. I am deep gratitude for you that see the real me and hold this space especially when I’m cantankerous, cranky or hot-headed. I acknowledge occasionally dropping my head in the awesome reflection of your strength, beauty and all that you are. Such personal revealing is quite awakening. And humbling too. It’s because of you that I’m able to hold this space for others whom I have the opportunity to reflect the highest aspects of Light. I love that we reflect and collaborate with one another. I can’t seem to get enough… How can I just say thank you for all of this? I’m not sure but I’m so desire to share my gratitude because in the process I learn about me. This is contrasted with who I think I am versus who I really am. I’m thankful that you see me as I really am and I have been given the special opportunity to see you. I’m grateful for each opportunity that we share together. This moment is indeed a special one. We are here now. Riding the same ride at the same time which makes our connection ever rare. I recognize you and ask you to remember what you’ve come here to do. I promise it’s a lot more than perhaps what you’ve created so far. I’m thankful that you would consider taking the risk to step away from that which you might think to be really crazy and to acknowledge yourself fully in the strength of why you’ve come here to this exact moment in time. I’m grateful that this might stir something in you and that you might find yourself compelled to move forward and to release old beliefs or thoughts that have kept you from fully expressing. I am so grateful that you’re willing to overcome any and all of the adversities that you have created in life. I can honestly say that your journey inspires me in ways that move my soul. I’m in awe of you. I really mean every step that you’ve taken. I can honestly say, you inspire me to new heights in your choices. I can see that you want true spiritual connection and you’re destined to have it in your desire. I am grateful for all the light that you have and continue to reflect. I’m grateful that you aren’t listening to my words but that we are consciously connecting on a spiritual level. Let me momentarily interrupt this pattern of gratitude to further focus on why you are here now and how is it that I may assist you, in the same way, that you can assist me. The secrets of gratitude is found in the process. The reason you and I are encouraged to express gratitude is because it takes us outside of the perils, tribulations and heaviness that sometimes encumbers us. The real secret of gratitude is indeed the connection. The process of being sincerely grateful connects in ways that are thankfully, pun intended, beyond having to connect through extreme trauma. I understand drama as a tool for connection and I also appreciate that not everyone sees or understands, as I expect that you do too, allowing us to express real compassion for those who are purposely in the dark and not awakened. I’ve been lost in the dark of night. The fear that my body creates is only out done by my mind as it continues to pump out streaming possibilities – all based in separation. Fear. I know we aren’t alone. Source has suggested a process of our using gratitude as a path to guarantee our connection to our Higher Self and the the Light. Who knew it could be that simple? There are plenty of times where I still feel like it’s a struggle but in this moment I demand it all to stop. Thanksgiving isn’t a day it’s a process. It’s the secret of our Divine connection. It’s a significant tool to joining and honoring one another. Certainly, it’s possible to be experience a insincere state of gratitude and this is like practicing any sport when you’re technically present but totally unfocused. Putting your attention on the secrets of gratitude gives you and I what we seek most – connection. This connection is really endless, which is incomprehensible to the mind, but not to your soul. Before concluding the secrets of gratitude, can I share perhaps the yet the most important thing? The fact the being here is more than enough. No matter where you’ve been, or what you’ve done, conscious or not, you’re here. Because of this, the orchestra is gathered. It’s now time to play. Play is both a metaphor and also an invitation. A call to action. Nobody is forced but if you’re here then perhaps it’s really time to accelerate your contributions. It’s easy for me to say, that you’ve waited your whole life to be here. Take advantage of your conscious awareness. I’m so grateful that we share it together. Step forward in gratitude and consider expressing yourself boldly. Consider going even further to see what’s inside you. Maybe you too feel compelled to share more of yourself as you come further into your body, and to be present with me and so many others, in your awakening. In conclusion, the secrets of gratitude is a force. A life force that connects us in ways that allows us to tap into our divinity. It’s yours. It’s always been there. Consider listening to this podcast more than once. Perhaps listen to it dozens of times to see what you can truly glean about the process and the real secrets of gratitude. Soon, as a companion to what we’re doing here, I will offer you a quiz to prompt your focused attention in how gratitude transforms your reality. I didn’t talk about this, during the course of our dialog, and it’s considered bad form to introduce something new in a conclusion, but have you ever considered being in gratitude for something yet to come? Is it possible for you to be in gratitude for the future? This indeed is another level of gratitude but it does continue to show you the power of the process one of which, like you, I’m still learning and I’m also so grateful to have the understanding. In absolute honor of you. Let me continue to say, thank you…. WRITE A REVIEW It only takes a few minutes. Your comments and review truly assist others in becoming a part of our spiritual community. Write a Review now SOMETHING MORE Contact Us HereTelephone: (480) 212-1961 More Podcasts My Octopus Oracle | True Connections With Weston Jolly – Ep 64 Hi, I'mWeston After providing over 15,000 hours in session and speaking, I recognize that... “You’re much stronger and more empowered than you think you are…" My Story When does an Octopus become a spiritual Oracle?My Octopus Teacher is a documentary with an... 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