2 minutes | Feb 23rd 2020

Advice for Songwriters

Advice for SongwritersYou can't write a songIn a comfortable, air-conditioned roomWith plenty of time on your handsYou can't write a songIn a happy relationshipOr in a rainforest,with friends you loveBecause you can't write a songWhen you're happy, and everything is going your wayOr when you've just won an award... Even if it's an award for songwritingBy the way I just bought a vinyl record of Beethoven, played by the Berlin Philharmonicfor one dollarThat's what you're up againstYou can't write a songSucking on a mentholOr chewing gumOr if you just brushed your teethYou can't write a songAt your parents houseUnless they abused youAnd they're not thereAnd you still hate them for itYou can't write a songWhen you're getting paid good moneyOr when you've just bought a new car Or after listeningTo an inspiring Ted talkYou can't write a songAt a music festivalOr on a holidayOr in a swimming poolYou can't even write a songWhen you paid for your own whiskeyOr if it's your birthdayOr if there's a rainbow in the skyStrangely,  you can write a songWhen you've given up on writing songsOr when you're meant to be doing something elseOr when you walked home from the party because you were too stonedand you got bitten by a dogYou can write a songin the in-between spacesLike when you've run out of timebecause you need to be somewhere elseOr when you're just jealous as fuckBecause someone did it better than youWith that in mindTake no notice of these instructionsThey are a ruse Because the world doesn't need any more songsWe have enough alreadyThank you.
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