Listen Now

Wherein the narrator makes his first Long Island Iced Tea behind the bar, and wonders how anyone can drink this, then encounters a roach in the shower before thinking aloud about marriage for a while. Support DEAD IN THE WATER on Seed & Spark: https://seedandspark.com/fund/dead-in-the-water#story

Wherein, for relative lack of flesh-and-blood company, the narrator confides his vague distress about something, and also tells of how he was kicked out if McDonald's and got embroiled in a whole corporate shitshow.

Wherein the narrator talks about eating lotsa bread lately, how QUEEN'S GAMBIT is secretly about turning thirty, riffs about the bad sort of male self-help guru, and then has a great conversation with another local podcaster, entrepreneur, and social media manager for Gray Goose Vodka, Blair Cassuto.

Wherein the narrator, a newly-appointed bartender, presents us with two spooky tales about customers to whom he's been serving daytime drinks--presents us, as well, with a careful critical dissection of a Donald Trump phonecall, and a glimpse into Giorgio the Synth King's latest project.

Wherein the narrator goes on, at yet greater length, about his new job as a server at a pizza parlor, and also tells an old Buddy Hackett joke and wonders at his own use of certain words over others and why, despite being ~happy~ as a server, he's so relentlessly self-deprecating and condescending about it.

Wherein the narrator provides exhaustive detail about his new job at a pizza parlor, digressing briefly to address sex in his first (and last) long-distance relationship, the horse in his neighborhood, and how he was a very bad drug dealer in college. This episode sponsored by the LEARN SPANISH CON SALSA PODCAST. https://www.learnspanishconsalsa.com/podcast/

Wherein the narrator assesses the issue of the least-pronounceable condiment, addresses his departure from a recent job, and talks about becoming a rideshare driver and discovering the radio again after nine months in quarantine.