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We Turned Out Okay

17 Episodes

79 minutes | 3 days ago
357: What does your heart long for?
Greetings! In today’s episode we examine the process of getting what our heart longs for, in a coaching conversation with one of my 1-to-1 coaching clients! As you’ll hear, Regan is a mom and an attorney, currently (along with her husband) working from home while their children are home as well, in in virtual/hybrid school. Regan gets courageous and vulnerable with us today. She shares the dream of her heart for her kids… and what she’s doing each and every day to help make that dream come true. In our conversation you’ll learn: – How to get your heart’s desire – The importance of big dreams and tiny action steps – Making both your superpower AND the dark side of that superpower work for you in achieving your dreams Lately I’ve been asking coaching clients “what makes my coaching magical?” (You’ll hear Regan and I talk about this in this episode.) The answers I’m getting back are fascinating – it turns out that something I’m really good at is helping parents stop treading the conventional path and do what works for THEM, and their family. We all have dreams. What are you doing to make yours reality? If you’re ready to go on the adventure of your life with me as your guide, write me, and let’s talk! Plus… This is a digest episode, so in addition to our conversation I’m bringing you a story that I recently sent to the folks in my free email newsgroup! Click this link to get weekly letters like this delivered right to your inbox: weturnedoutokay.com/weekly I share about the “Parents Working from Home” free virtual summit that I’m honored to be included in (happening this coming Saturday 2/27, 10 AM to 1 PM EST). And, I give you an update on a new segment of this podcast: it’s called Triumphs and Misdemeanors, and I hope you will be a part of it! Join us! Key Links: Click here for psychologist – and friend-of-the-podcast – Shannon Connery’s recent episode of her Fix Yourself podcast, in which she talks about energy level and a way to think of it that’s been really helpful for me recently. Maybe it will be helpful for you, too! Click here for the weekly planner that Regan and I discuss in this episode. The planner was once exclusively for people in my Ninja Parenting Community, but I am sharing it here with you today in hopes that it will help you to see your entire week in one half sheet piece of printer paper. Enjoy! Click here to sign up for the free Parenting While Working from Home Virtual Summit taking place Saturday February 27 from 10 AM to 1 PM EST. (Also I’ll be stopping by the Facebook group associated with the Virtual Summit between noon and 1 PM EST. Maybe I’ll see you there!) Click here to read the story that I share today in the latter part of this episode, called “What my Italian relatives know about the off-season.” (This is also where you can see the picture I mention in today’s episode, me in Venice in 1992, wearing *quite* a sweater : ) Click the following link to view the show notes from today’s episode on my website: weturnedoutokay.com/357 _________________________________________________ Get my best advice for handling the challenges that come up on your parenting journey, through the We Turned Out Okay podcast: Listen in your favorite podcatcher! Here are a few choice spots: Apple Podcasts Spotify Stitcher Podcasts
65 minutes | 17 days ago
356: The consequences of pushing ourselves too far – Talking with educator Sarah Scheldt M.Ed. today!
Due to the content of our conversation, today’s episode is going to be a good one to listen AWAY from sensitive ears… I think you’re going to love today’s conversation, I know I did! But some topics may be a little intense for, well, littles. Greetings! I am super excited to bring today’s guest to you, educator and parent coach Sarah Scheldt, M.Ed.! In today’s conversation I’ll introduce you to Sarah, so you can come to know her and the incredibly helpful, giving person she is. Today Sarah discusses: – How to handle your kids’ toughest days and biggest feelings – How to take care of yourself in the midst of everything going on in your life – Handling when we do push ourselves too far Early on in the pandemic Sarah wanted to reach parents outside of her classroom of kids. So she created an amazing free Virtual Summit on “empowering kids.” I felt so honored to be included in the expert speakers for that summit! Sarah’s second free online series, Kids’ Healthy Bodies, starts on February 15! (Yay! Click here to sign up!) In our conversation today Sarah shares on how this upcoming free Virtual Summit will help you get a handle on talking to kids about potentially tough topics like their own bodies, sex, consent, and stopping child sexual abuse. I’m honored to be a part of this series as well, talking about what to do if you have been the victim of sexual abuse… and you are now raising kids. There will be experts on all kinds of topics around children and their healthy bodies, so be sure to sign up! I know you’re going to love today’s conversation… If you’d like to see us visually, in addition to listening, you can find the video for this conversation by clicking https://weturnedoutokay.com/356 I hope you find our talk super helpful! Cheers! Karen Links from today’s conversation: Click here to sign up for Sarah Scheldt’s upcoming Free Virtual Summit on Kids’ Healthy Bodies – I’m one of the expert speakers, so I know how awesome this series is going to be. Click here for the Yo-Yo Ma documentary, Distant Echoes, on the time that Ma spent with the Bush People of the Kalahari Desert, learning how they make music – and meaning.   Get my best advice for handling the challenges that come up on your parenting journey, through the We Turned Out Okay podcast: Listen in your favorite podcatcher! Here are a few choice spots: Apple Podcasts Spotify Stitcher Podcasts
58 minutes | a month ago
355: Five ways to help you keep going right now
Greetings! Today I’ve got five ways that parents I work closely with are keeping going… Because even though we can see some hope on the horizon, circumstances on the ground are, shall we say, not ideal. So if you need a little help getting good behavior from your kids, feeling seen and heard and cared for in your life, or feeling happy inside, here are five ways you may not have considered yet to accomplish those tasks.… Plus the Parenting News Segment returns today, with reports on how to not use social-emotional learning for evil, and also something called “toxic positivity.” Join us! Here are the links that come up today: This episode’s home-on-the-web is weturnedoutokay.com/355 In the first few minutes of today’s show I share (a little bit) about my experience of being sexually abused when I was seven years old. This comes up in my first book, Positive Discipline Ninja Tactics, in the chapter called How to Help if Something’s Wrong; you can buy the book by clicking here I share about being hospitalized with diverticulitis last fall in episode 349: Kindergarten Evals, Parent-Teacher-Conferences, and Lessons I learned from being hospitalized last week, weturnedoutokay.com/349 Beloved Ninja Parenting Community alum Jen came on the show in summer 2019 to talk about how she got control over the direction her family is going: weturnedoutokay.com/288 In episode 300 of We Turned Out Okay, two amazing and close friends of mine, licensed mental health counselor Janine Halloran and veteran preschool teacher Tricia Tomaso came on the show, and unbeknownst to each other (or me) they both brought the same topic: Social Emotional Learning… Weturnedoutokay.com/300 Speaking of Janine Halloran, she’s going to be an expert speaker in the Parenting in Place Masterclass Series this winter! Register for this awesome series by going to parentinginplacemasterclass.com Today I share that I am planning a new segment of the show… that it’s going to include input from our wonderful listeners… and the first people who will know about it are those who get my free weekly newsletters! Find out what’s up by subscribing for these newsletters yourself: weturnedoutokay.com/weekly If you want to start getting my free weekly newsletters AND you’ve got reluctant or unhappy readers at home, sign up for my free Guide to Creating Happy Readers at weturnedoutokay.com/readers Thank you for listening and reading! You rock!
49 minutes | a month ago
354: Goals and Words and a “kind 2021”
Greetings and best wishes for 2021!! This is my annual goals and sharing of the Word of the Year. (Last year’s: ENOUGH. I apparently was really prescient in January 2020… This year’s: EXHILARATED. Should be fun!) As with everything in the pandemic, it’s different from other New Year’s episodes that have come before. But I hope it’s helpful for you as you create a good life, and a good year, for your family and yourself. Some of my goals last year I completely, epically failed at bringing about. Some of them I did a little bit better with. One of the most important things I learned was to make a goal be “a place to come from,” rather than something to work towards. Seriously, this has been a huge game-changer for me. I share about that process and give you ideas for trying it out yourself today. Finally I read you one of my most recent newsletters, “Hello 2021! Please be kind to us.” You can get these newsletters delivered for free right into your inbox just by signing up for one of my free guides available at weturnedoutokay.com… Or go to weturnedoutokay.com/weekly Key Links: Click weturnedoutokay.com/312 for last year, January 2020’s Goals and One Word episode. Listening back I was such a pre-pandemic naïve little baby then! I’ve grown a lot in 2020. I bet you have too. Ultimately this is a good thing, I think. We are such badasses now! Click here for a book I am loving, 100 Truths You Will Learn Too Late by Luca Dellanna Click weturnedoutokay.com/books to see the parenting books I have written Click here for my most recent newsletter, “Hello 2021! Please be kind to us.” Click weturnedoutokay.com/354 to watch the video of today’s episode. Cheers! I hope 2021 is REALLY kind to you <3 _______________________________ Get my best advice for handling the challenges that come up on your parenting journey, through the We Turned Out Okay podcast: Listen in your favorite podcatcher! Here are a few choice spots: Apple Podcasts Spotify Stitcher Podcasts  
26 minutes | 2 months ago
353.5: What your child needs from you today
Hi friends! This is a bonus episode that I recorded to help you in the wake of January 6, 2021’s storming of the United States Capitol Building by domestic terrorists, or (as you’ll hear in today’s episode) people that featured WTOO guest and NYT best-selling author Joshilyn Jackson calls “known jackasses.” I want to give you some resources to help you remain calm – because that is what your kiddo needs from you today. I am more grateful than I can say that you are listening, I can almost feel us holding hands and standing together today… I will have links posted (at weturnedoutokay.com/353-5) ASAP, but for now I just want you to be able to hear my words and know that you can remain calm, for your child and for yourself. No matter what is going on in your world, or in the wider world. And I am here with you. xoxo, Karen Links… Thank you for your patience! Here they are finally : ) My conversation with former assistant secretary of Homeland security Juliette Kayyem: https://weturnedoutokay.com/110 My conversation with licensed mental health counselor and coping skills expert – and also one of my favorite people in the whole world – Janine Halloran on managing the biggest feelings: https://weturnedoutokay.com/201 My conversation with Dr. Laura Markham, all around feelings and (childhood and grown up emotions)… https://weturnedoutokay.com/255 My conversation with NYT best-selling author Joshilyn Jackson, who wrote one of my favorite books of all time, The Almost Sisters, and comes on the show to talk about empathy, the hope that writing can bring to even the darkest places, and so much else: https://weturnedoutokay.com/194 My conversation with Ingrid Alli and Hamilton Graziano, the biracial couple who were having their honeymoon in Puerto Rico, staying in the same B&B Ben and I were staying in for our second honeymoon. Ingrid and Hamilton shared so much of themselves in this conversation, more than three years ago now, and it really helped me understand how to be good ally in dismantling racism: https://weturnedoutokay.com/176 Lessons I learned and resources shared during the amazing Julie Lythcott-Haims’ post-election Office Hours… Julie has also written one of my favorite books ever, Real American, about her experience growing up biracial in affluent white American society, and the energy she brings to help solve the challenges we face here in the US keeps me going! https://weturnedoutokay.com/julie The Veterans Administration has a wonderful mindfulness app, called Mindfulness Coach, which you do not need to sign up for or enroll in. You just put it on your phone and have access to all the resources there. It’s awesome. https://mobile.va.gov/app/mindfulness-coach If you’d like to get tools and resources to help you raise kids and stay sane: https://weturnedoutokay.com/weekly Thanks for reading!
83 minutes | 2 months ago
353: Challenges with reading, ADHD meds, kids trying their best, and more: Ask the child development expert
Greetings! I’ve got a whole slew of awesome questions for you today (you can read the questions in their entirety just below : ) Here are the Key Links that come up in today’s episode, located at weturnedoutokay.com/353 You should go to that link above if you would like to see the video of this episode (instead of just listening in audio)… Cheers and thanks for listening! Karen Links that come up today: My free guide to raising happy readers: weturnedoutokay.com/readers If you’d like to get useful tools and parenting ideas in your inbox each week, without the guide to happy readers: weturnedoutokay.com/weekly Click here for one of the many wonderful Elephant and Piggy books by Mo Willems Click here for a book that your family might enjoy with new readers, You Read to Me, I’ll Read to You How NOT to teach your child to ride a bike: https://weturnedoutokay.com/092-how-to-teach-your-young-child-to-ride-a-bike/ Click the following link for one of the very early episodes I did, about how kids develop grit: https://weturnedoutokay.com/002/ Click the following link for my conversation with Amy Anderson, about how to know if your young child is consenting: https://weturnedoutokay.com/066 Click the following link for my conversation with Carey Andersen, sharing her story of her child’s nonconsent to a bad kindergarten situation and what they did about it: https://weturnedoutokay.com/045 Click the following link for my conversation with Debbie Reber of the TiLT Parenting Podcast: https://weturnedoutokay.com/350 Okay, just below are the questions! Thanks for reading and listening! Cheers! Tish: What do I say to my 6 year old who can’t seem to keep his hands out of his pants? How do I win when trying to get 2 6 year old(s) to practice reading and not lose my mind?  It’s a nightmare everyday. I’ve tried to bribe, threaten, prayed loudly, and I can’t seem to find anything that works. It’s not as bad when they are out of school and we can do it in the mornings but the evenings are a nightmare every. single. day.  Not doing it is not an option.  We’ll be further behind than we are now. Whether we think this is “right” or not doesn’t mean they will change their policy.  We are on Book 4 out of 12 we have to read to go the 2nd grade.   Surviving… because this too will pass.     Anonymous: We are in the midst of struggling mightily on [my five-year-old’s] second med trial for ADHD. This one is not making any difference at school except he’s even more talkative and then he’s having a huge emotional crash and sobbing meltdowns in the evenings. Working with the doctor to figure out a new plan this week! Other than that just powering through end of year work chaos. Trying to stay positive as I hear this is so common to have to try a few meds but it’s hard! So we are in survival mode but going to make the most of the holidays! [Karen:] FYI I have discovered some biases in myself, and as a result I’m going to do some more research into this whole issue – meds, ADD, ADHD, coping mechanisms both for kids and parents. This deserves at least an episode, and possibly a series. Stay tuned <3   Jen: My daughter, age 8 already, wants to ride a bicycle again. She had a typical bike fall a year ago (a scrape on the knee, just a run of the mill slow-speed fall that comes from learning how to balance) and has been avoiding the bike ever since. Typical for her high anxiety. She tells me she’s afraid of falling again and she wants to ride on the school running track, which we did one time when she was 5, before we knew it wasn’t allowed. She is also concerned that the training wheels send an unpleasant rumble into her body when she rides on asphalt. Uneven pavement or rocks or sticks make her afraid of falling. My concerns are the school rule, and driving 15 minutes or less. Our rural home has no paved areas at all, and so any riding involves packing up the car and driving to a safe place. But every time we talk about biking, and try to work out where we might go, she gets frustrated that nothing meets her criteria. We simply can’t use the running track. She understands that intellectually, and she isn’t asking me to break the rule. She’s hoping, I guess, that I have some amazing cushiony place where she can fall without risk of hurting herself. Since I don’t, she gets frustrated and cries that she’ll never be able to ride a bike. She wants to get good enough to remove the training wheels, because she sees her 6yo sister without training wheels having a ball, and she doesn’t want the unpleasant rumble that comes with leaning onto the training wheels. I’m at a loss here. How can I support her desire to practice, when the practice itself is too scary for her?   Mumma Bear: What’s in my mind is more emotional development tips and techniques. Im  still battling with somewhat ‘explosive’ outbursts from Lil Bear and I’d like a bigger range of tools for this moment in our lives. I feel like I’m pretty emotionally immature (although my best friend says, No way – listen to yourself!) and that I wasn’t really taught to process my feelings  (not a top priority  in the 1970s!) or really ‘deal’ with them. So I most frequently find myself thinking, “Just get a grip, kiddo!” So, for me, just keep those tips coming.       Celia: Once we can start doing “stuff” again, how do we make sure we don’t overdo it and still hold onto some of the unity and rhythm we’ve found as a family while we were isolated from other forces?   And… this year E turns 5 and “should” start kindergarten. She turns 5 in late august and our cutoff is sept 1. She’s already the “baby” in her preK class and I am assuming a lot of parents held their children back in 2019 since our district was virtual, so she’ll be likely joining kids who are already 6 and maybe even close to 7. How do we know if she is ready for kindergarten???   Thanks so much for all of your support this year! I have high hopes for your 2021   Q: “Perhaps we should be instilling resilience by still expecting them to try their best. Because being emotionally healthy and trying one’s best are not mutually exclusive during Covid.”   _____________________________________________ Listen to We Turned Out Okay in your favorite podcatcher! Here are a few choice spots: Apple Podcasts Stitcher Podcasts Spotify (search for We Turned Out Okay Podcast)
76 minutes | 3 months ago
351: “In 25 years, what will matter to me?” My conversation with Katherine Reynolds Lewis
Enrollment is OPEN for the 2021 Year of Empowerment! Enroll now to save 30% on your Year of Empowerment: This special ends New Year’s Eve, December 31 2020 at 11:59 PM EST. Don’t miss your chance to empower 2021 for you and your family. Details at weturnedoutokay.com/empowerment : ) “In 25 years, what will matter to me?” When Katherine Reynolds Lewis, author of the outstanding book The Good News About Bad Behavior and today’s guest, shared this question during our conversation, I knew it had to be the title of the episode. It encompasses all the most important ideas that Katherine brings. The ones that keep reminding me about what’s most important. It’s not grades, or how perfectly our kids sit during online schooling. It’s not the world’s cleanest house, or how perfectly we manage our home. The most important thing – the thing that will matter most even 25 years from now – is the connection and the relationship that we have with our loved ones. Today’s conversation is so full of connection, and love, and hope. It’s part of a digest episode, so you’ll hear our wonderful conversation and then I will read you a recent newsletter that I wrote called “Kind words.” (Click weturnedoutokay.com/weekly to get newsletters like this delivered into your inbox each week : ) I hope you enjoy this episode! Cheers – Karen PS you can watch our conversation (instead of just listening) by going to weturnedoutokay.com/351… Key Links Below: Visit Katherine at her website, KatherineRLewis.com… and be sure to find the Articles section of Katherine’s website, as well as signing up – as I did – for her newsletter! Find out about the Parent Encouragement Program (Katherine spent years as a certified parent educator with this program, and her husband still teaches at PEP) by going to pepparent.org My page on combating bias and racism comes up in today’s conversation; click this link to visit the page: https://weturnedoutokay.com/bias I heard Dr. Manuel Astruc on Shannon Connery’s wonderful podcast Fix Yourself, just on the morning I interviewed Katherine; Dr. Astruc’s brilliant insight into the three aspects of burnout comes up in today’s conversation. Click the link below to listen: https://www.shannonconnery.com/beating-burnout-with-dr-manuel-astruc Join the Parenting in Place Masterclass by going to parentinginplacemasterclass.com. You will be glad you did! Enrollment is OPEN for the 2021 Year of Empowerment! Enroll now to save 30% on your Year of Empowerment: This special ends New Year’s Eve, December 31 2020 at 11:59 PM EST. Don’t miss your chance to empower 2021 for you and your family. Details at weturnedoutokay.com/empowerment : )   Get my best advice for handling the challenges that come up on your parenting journey, through the We Turned Out Okay podcast: Listen in your favorite podcatcher! Here are a few choice spots: Apple Podcasts Stitcher Podcasts Spotify (search for We Turned Out Okay Podcast)
23 minutes | 3 months ago
350.5 An Announcement (and FAQs about that Announcement)
Hello! So quickie bonus episode with me are never as quickie as I imagine they would be, but this one will hopefully be informative for you! In it, I share about the only group coaching I’m offering in 2021. As a child development expert and parent coach I have given lots of thought on what I could offer that will have the most impact on the well-being of you, and your family, over the coming year. I’ve come up with something exciting! It’s called the 2021 Year of Empowerment Program, and it will help you: – feel in charge of your destiny and your family’s direction – know that you are making the right decisions for you and your family – live your best life and model that for your kids. Enrolling means you will spend 2021: – Getting good behavior from your children – Advocating for them, helping them love learning and get the best education possible, no matter how bad all of this feels right now – Feeling good about getting the self-care time that you need and deserve I expect that spots will fill up quickly, as there are only 20 to begin with and especially with the Black Friday special I’m offering, 50% off the cost of the program! To get notified when enrollment opens go to: https://weturnedoutokay.com/weekly If you’ve got any questions email me, Karen (at) weturnedoutokay (dot) com. Thanks for reading/listening and Cheers! Karen Click the link below to learn more about the 2021 Year of Empowerment: https://weturnedoutokay.com/empowerment Click the link below to get notified when enrollment opens: https://weturnedoutokay.com/weekly Here are the FAQs in written form: FAQs about the 2021 Year of Empowerment Program – What is the age range for people’s kids in the program? Parents with kids in all ages and stages of childhood, from babies and toddlers on up to teens, are welcome. The issues that parents are confronting have kind of converged since the onset of the pandemic. There are no conventions anymore. Everything is unprecedented. Parents with children of every age are feeling this seismic shift. As a result the Year of Empowerment will be a great, supportive community for parents with kids of all ages. It will help you build the life that you really want within your family. – How will this program work? The 2021 Year of Empowerment Program has two main facets: 1. Each month of 2021 we will have a group coaching conversation, a powerful, in-depth, 90 minute call diving into the different aspects of empowerment including advocating for your kids, establishing boundaries so you only ever do what feels truly good for you, and modeling a wonderful and empowering life for your family. 2. A year’s subscription to the acclaimed We Turned Out Okay Playbook! The Playbook provides a place for you to envision and build out your life and your family’s future. The 2021 Year of Empowerment program includes a whole year – 12 issues – of the Playbook, one each month, delivered directly to your mailbox! (US only; internationally you’ll receive the digital version of the Playbook.) Each month you’ll receive this top-shelf publication that shapes your thinking in a very positive and gratitude-centered way. (Learn more about the Playbook at https://weturnedoutokay.com/playbook) Between our monthly calls and the daily, positive and creative thinking opportunities the Playbook offers, the 2021 Year of Empowerment Program gives you extremely powerful tools to shape your life how you want it. – What if I can’t make a meeting? That is absolutely fine… You can be committed and still not be able to get to every single meeting over the course of a whole year. So, each monthly meeting and the PDF of each month’s We Turned Out Okay Playbook will be placed in the password-protected 2021 Year of Empowerment Resource Hub. That way, you’ll be able to go back and watch meetings as often as you like, and you’ll have PDFs of each Playbook as they come out. Any resources such as worksheets, notes, or links will also be placed in the resource hub, where you will have access to everything for the duration of the program. – What days and times will the meetings be? I want this program to work for you, wherever you live and whatever your time zone. As a result this is a crucial question, something very important to get right. In designing the program I am thinking either Saturday afternoons like 3 PM EST, or a weeknight with a very late EST start time, say, 10 PM, is where we will end up, perhaps even alternating months between these time periods. I really want to make it work for those of you who are considering making this commitment. Therefore I would love your feedback! What meeting times would work best for you? Just hit reply to this email and let me know. – What technology will be necessary? Will it be complex? Not at all, we’re using basic, easy tech in the Year of Empowerment Program. You’ll need only your email, your web browser, and Zoom (which we’ll use for our monthly meetings.) Speaking as someone whose twitter name used to be StoneAgeTechie, I know the pain of complicated tech! I want to make this easily accessible for everyone who joins. – Will I be able to access the 2021 Year of Empowerment Program on my phone or tablet? Absolutely : ) It will be a mobile-friendly program, and of course will also be accessible on your laptop or desktop computer. – Will there be the choice of a payment plan? Yes, you’ll have the option to pay either in full, or in three installments. I’ll share the details on Monday 11/23 when I open enrollment in the Program. – Will there be refunds? The 2021 Year of Empowerment Program is for folks who are truly committed to building a great future for themselves and their family.There are no refunds.It will be worth every penny. – Are there any prerequisites to the Year of Empowerment Program? You do not have to have been in any program of mine before, whether workshops, courses, or the Ninja Parenting Community. The only prerequisites are your positive energy and your commitment to building the future that you want for your family. I anticipate that spots will go fast. Especially with the Black Friday special – normally the Program costs $3000, but if you join by Cyber Monday, November 30, 2020 you can join for half that, just $1500! Here are some quickie facts about the program: Enrolling in the 2021 Year of Empowerment Program means you will spend 2021 transforming your future, and your family’s. Each month you’ll experience the magic of my best, most transformative ideas and tools to build your life how you want it. There are only 20 spots available. This is the only group coaching I’m offering in all of 2021. I anticipate spots will fill up quickly. It’s for folks who are truly committed to building a great future for themselves and their family. It’s the most affordable option to work with me in 2021. There are no refunds. It will be worth every penny. Enrollment will open this coming Wednesday 11/25/20, and when it does I will send an email to everyone who is in my email group sharing details and the link to enroll.… Click the link below to join the email group https://weturnedoutokay.com/weekly In the meantime I hope you have a lovely weekend. Cheers and thanks for reading/listening <3
82 minutes | 3 months ago
350: “Letting go of what others think” with Debbie Reber of TiLT Parenting
I am super excited to bring you today’s episode, which includes so much good that my heart is practically bursting : ) It’s a digest episode, and the first part is my conversation with Debbie Reber, founder of the TiLT Parenting Podcast, http://tiltparenting.com, and author of one of my favorite books, Differently Wired: Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World. Somewhere in the first few minutes we decide to depart from a kind of standard interview, Q&A sort of conversation and dive into something much better and more fun! Here are some of Debbie’s ideas that felt so transformative for me: – “I love that you mention taking care of your body…” Debbie goes on to share how important this idea is, and how often we truly do forget. (My forgetting, as I share today, landed me in the hospital just a few weeks before our conversation.) – “Asking “What if I had no agenda at all?””… Debbie brings this up in reference to children and learning. If we don’t have an agenda, we are free to just be in the moment and enjoying the time with our children. And more – if we don’t have an agenda we are free to allow our kids on a voyage of self-discovery. This is crucial, even more so with the world turned upside down from the pandemic. – “I have permission to do whatever I want and feel whatever I feel.”… Debbie shares this as a way of diffusing judgment. Giving ourselves this permission is so freeing. I hope this conversation is transformational for you, too! In Part 2 I read an essay I wrote recently, called “A hard decision I have made.” It shares about the decision I recently made to close my Ninja Parenting Community – and after I read it, I share about something I’m truly excited about, the group coaching program I’m offering for 2021 called “The Year of Empowerment.” 2021: The Year of Empowerment Program: … Helps you combat the challenge of others walking all over you, so you feel in charge of your destiny and your family’s direction. … Helps you overcome your fears about your child’s behavior and others” judgment of that behavior or your parenting. So you know that you are making the right decisions for you and your family. … Helps you stop feeling guilty or unworthy so you can live your best life and model that for your kids. Each month of 2021 you’ll be empowered to truly take the reins in your family life. You will know how to get good behavior from your child. You will know how to advocate for them, to help them love learning and get the best education possible – no matter how bad all of this feels right now. You will know how to feel good about getting the self-care time you need and deserve. How will this program work? 1. Each month of 2021 we will have a group coaching conversation, a powerful, in-depth, 90 minute call diving into the different aspects of empowerment including: – The setting of proper boundaries to eliminate toxic people from your life – Learning to say “no,” so you only participate in and do what feels truly good for you – Advocating for your child – Learning the tenets of positive discipline, so your child does not walk all over you anymore – Teaching your child about the world – Living a truly wonderful and empowering life – Consequently modeling “how to live a truly wonderful and empowering life” for your family 2. A year’s subscription to the acclaimed We Turned Out Okay Playbook! The We Turned Out Okay Playbook provides a place for you to envision and build out your life and your family’s future. The 2021 Year of Empowerment program includes a whole year – 12 issues – of the Playbook, one each month, delivered directly to your mailbox! Each month you’ll receive the Playbook, my top-shelf publication that shapes your thinking in a very positive and gratitude-centered way. (Learn more about the Playbook at: https://weturnedoutokay.com/playbook) Between our monthly calls and the daily, positive and creative thinking opportunities the Playbook offers, you have extremely powerful tools to shape your life how you want it. Cost and How to Enroll: The program costs $3000 for the year 2021. There are just 20 spots available. I’m offering a Black Friday special: 50% off! Just $1500 instead of the usual $3000! I’m opening up enrollment in the 2021 Year of Empowerment on Monday 11/23/20… Click the link below and sign up to get notified when enrollment begins! https://weturnedoutokay.com/weekly Cheers! And thanks for listening/reading! Karen Karen Lock Kolp, M.Ed. Creator and Founder of https://weturnedoutokay.com View this post, video of our conversation, and all notes and links in your browser by clicking the link below: https://weturnedoutokay.com/350 Key Links: All things Debbie Reber at http://tiltparenting.com Debbie’s wonderful TiLT Together Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/tilttogether The podcast episode I recently did called The Secret Fears of a Child Development Expert: https://weturnedoutokay.com/344 Debbie is an integral part of one of my favorite parenting series ever, http://parentinginplacemasterclass.com My conversation with Jess Lahey and KJ Dell’Antonia on their podcast, #amwriting: https://amwriting.substack.com/p/episode-174-whenitsreallyhard Debbie highly recommends the book Positive Discipline by Jane Nelson The Real Deal – Debbie’s 3-book contribution to the Chicken Soup for the Soul series! Join my email group to receive parenting tools and ideas in your inbox each week AND to be notified when I open enrollment for my 2021 Year of Empowerment Program (enrollment begins 11/23!) https://weturnedoutokay.com/weekly Learn more and subscribe to the We Turned Out Okay Playbook at the following link: https://weturnedoutokay.com/playbook   Get my best advice for handling the challenges that come up on your parenting journey, through the We Turned Out Okay podcast: Listen in your favorite podcatcher! Here are a few choice spots: Apple Podcasts Stitcher Podcasts Spotify (search for We Turned Out Okay Podcast)  
69 minutes | 6 months ago
345: How to feel in control with Mom, Author, and School Counselor Phyllis Fagell, LCPC
  I’m so excited to bring you today’s guest, Phyllis Fagell, LCPC, mom, school counselor, and author of the wonderful book Middle School Matters. Phyllis helps us (yes – I include myself in here : ) – Pick our battles – Talk with teachers and caregivers – Figure out what we CAN do In short Phyllis helps us feel in control of our family’s direction right now. That’s SO important, given this extremely shaky start to the school year and our worries about the pandemic, downright silly politics, and the need for racial and social justice. Not to mention our own need to pour from a full cup and not an empty one. Given all that, I know you are going to LOVE our conversation! You can find Phyllis, and all the wonderful work she does, by going to PhyllisFagell.com <3 Links that come up in today’s episode: Because we’ve gone to and every-other-week schedule, in each episode I offer a back episode of We Turned Out Okay, something you can listen to in our off week! Today, I bring you my first conversation with Raeshal Solomon, from episode 215. Raeshal single-handedly got herself out from under a mountain of debt, while living with a serious chronic illness. She’s a money expert, but more than that she is an expert in keeping going! I know you are going to love this conversation. (Raeshal was also a part of OkayCon 2020, my Free Virtual Summit from this past March, right at the beginning of the pandemic. Click weturnedoutokay.com/328 for Raeshal’s wonderful contribution to OkayCon 2020.) I’m excited to share, I will be part of the Reignite Toddler Play global virtual summit coming up at the end of this month! I don’t have the link yet, but as soon as I do I will drop it in here. Holly Peretz, the creator of the Virtual Summit interviewed me this past week and I just know you’re going to love this conference! I’m spending September offering you HOPE… – Click here to watch the first module of my premium “How to Keep Going” course, absolutely free, right there on the page. – On that page you can also sign up to get the ENTIRE “How to Keep Going course, completely free! (You can also do that by clicking here.) – “A life raft for families who are struggling to stay afloat.” That’s what Janine Halloran, LMHC, author of Coping Skills for Kids and Coping Skills for Teens recently said about my We Turned Out Okay Playbook. That is high praise indeed! Check out the Playbook for yourself by going to weturnedoutokay.com/playbook. You can subscribe for the October issue on that page, too! – In this post, called “A case study about handling epic tantrums,” I share the tools and strategies that a mom in our Ninja Parenting Community successfully employed to stop her four-year-old’s extremely epic tantrums. If she can do it, so can you! Click here to learn how you can work with me, for free, for a whole month. – Bruce Feiler’s wonderful book, Life is in the Transitions, comes up in our conversation today. – Click here to say hi in Instagram!… In Twitter… On the WTOO Facebook page… Or in the WTOO Facebook Group!
56 minutes | 8 months ago
338: When they don’t want to wear clothes; square one with sharing; talking about death with kids; when they push each other’s buttons just for fun – it’s a Q&A today!
My brothers and I : ) Today we’re answering your GREAT questions! – “[My young daughter] is going through a phase of not wanting clothes on. Do I just not battle it? What’s appropriate at 4? How do I instill the importance of being careful without taking away her sweet innocence? Or am I totally overthinking this?” – “This week’s hot topic is sharing and temper around that. The minute [my three-year-old’s] little brother walks in the room (even if he hasn’t messed with her stuff yet) she goes right to screaming at him and throwing stuff… I’m struggling with getting her to react in a bit calmer way. “Understandably, she is having a lot of trouble letting other kids play with any of her toys. I get it, we haven’t had to share in a long time. I’m just wondering if there are some good strategies or advice for starting back at square one was sharing, and also talking nicely to others even when angry.” – “My four-year-old was playing with her toys saying “this one is dead, it’s in the dead place” (inside the toy garage) then when I needed a shower “Mummy you need to go to the shower and be dead”… How can I talk about death at an appropriate level for children?” – “They don’t stop fighting with each other – they push each other’s buttons just for “the fun of it.” (I said they were great questions : ) If You’re Struggling to Keep Going During this summer I’m using my newsletter to share about my own journey, trying to find peace and stop feeling so guilty while working, running our household, and keeping going sustainably. Last week I shared about my first step (stopping “obsessively checking” on the Internet, and (as I share in this episode) it’s going well! But I know I’ve got a long way to go… If you want to come along on this journey with me, I’m sharing about it in my newsletters. Click the link below to get them automagically delivered to your inbox! Weturnedoutokay.com weekly Tons of links today! You’ll find them just below : ) Cheat Sheet of Answers What to do when my child does not want to wear clothes? – The short answer is, we get to decide. Sometimes it’s absolutely fine for them to not wear a shirt outside. Whatever you decide on this question, it must work for you. Your child will accommodate, just as they do when sitting in a car seat in the car. “Starting back at square one with sharing” – Let your child know “you don’t have to share”… This feels totally backwards in mindset, I know! But it’s the best way that I know to encourage them to share. Also, ask them which favorite toys they’d like to put away, so they don’t have to be shared. Finally help them understand “you don’t have to share… BUT we do try to use kind words.” “Talking about death as an appropriate level for children” – This is about understanding that kids, developmentally, play out stuff that they worry about. They can push our buttons to cause a reaction from us, especially because in a child’s mind “any reaction is better than no reaction,” a common reason for their misbehavior. Gently steer them away from the topic, by asking a question about their play, or (if they’re feeling emotional when someone they know has died) talking and sharing good memories about that person. “Pushing each other’s buttons just for the fun of it” – Teach them not to pick up the gauntlet; as Brooks Gibbs says, teach them that a bully is playing a game, and the way to make the bully lose is to not get upset, no matter what. Talking stick meetings can be very helpful when a sibling fight escalates to violence. Finally “catching them doing good” is a tactic that can be very useful in teaching prosocial behavior and moving away from kids teasing each other. Key Links Click weturnedoutokay.com/197 for my conversation with Dr. Catherine Pearlman, in which we talk about ignoring your child’s bad behavior to make it go away. Dr. Pearlman is awesome at helping us with that! Click weturnedoutokay.com/255 for my conversation with Dr. Laura Markham, in which we talk about positive discipline and how sometimes we have to do the reverse of what feels “disciplinary” in order to get the best behavior from our kids. Click weturnedoutokay.com/169, “When Siblings Attack,” on alleviating sibling rivalry. I get to share about one of my favorite books in the whole world, Faber and Mazlish’s Siblings Without Rivalry. Click weturnedoutokay.com/302, “Why does my young child talk about killing and death?”, for a deep conversation about how young children confront and handle the idea of death – and how frightening their perfectly normal behavior can appear to us parents. (And how to handle it if your child is doing this right now.) Click here for the recent newsletter I wrote about how not “obsessively checking” the internet has been instrumental in making me feel better – less overwhelmed, less burned out, it’s even resulted in less parental guilt. Click the following link to sign up for future newsletters, including those in this “going from overwhelmed to at peace and sustainably keeping going” series: weturnedoutokay.com/weekly Click here for Positive Discipline Ninja Tactics, my first book. In it I share my experience in becoming a survivor of childhood sexual abuse (which is how this book comes up in today’s episode.) Click here for my conversation on Authentic Parenting, Anna Seewald’s wonderful podcast. Anna and I talked about how being sexually abused as a child has shaped my adulthood. Click weturnedoutokay.com/336, the listener Q&A episode I did a few weeks ago and in which I answer questions on sibling jealousy, and adoption. Click here for one of Brooks Gibbs’ outstanding videos on how to stop a bully. I hope you find this episode helpful!
60 minutes | 8 months ago
337: Addressing our own burnout, AND beloved parenting author Audrey Monke is my guest today!
As a child development expert, I want to help you keep going in our new reality! This conversation, recorded during March 2020 (in other words at the very beginning of the pandemic here in the US), I know will be super helpful for that. I am excited to bring you my conversation with the author of one of my favorite parenting books (it’s called Happy Campers) – Audrey Monke of sunshine-parenting.com is today’s OkayCon 2020 guest! Audrey shares: – How to stay positive, even while everyone is cooped up together – Some great family-focused activities you can do to make your stuck at home time more enjoyable – What lessons Audrey, her family, and counselors and campers (who attend the summer camp Audrey owns and runs) are learning from this time Learn how to keep going: In my (free) Weekly Parenting Newsletters I am taking you on my journey of recovering from burnout, exhaustion, and huge feelings of guilt. I am working to feel at peace with myself – to keep going, raising my kids, keeping our household running, and feeling happy inside – and if you want some tools to help you accomplish those miracles, click this link! Weturnedoutokay.com/weekly NPC Summer Camp registration ENDS Wednesday 7/1 One way parents have been feeling way better, recovering from exhaustion, handling their kids’ fears, clinginess, and potty training issues: the Ninja Parenting Community. Get access to everything in the community and enjoy a summer camp program created just for you, if you are looking for connection and positivity in our new reality! I am closing registration to NPC on Wednesday, July 1 at 9 PM EST – enroll today, and take that first step toward being able to feel at peace with yourself and (sustainably) keep going! Here is the link, jump in while there is still time: weturnedoutokay.com/joinNPC (go to weturnedoutokay.com/337 for notes to this episode) We will get through this together! Cheers – Karen OkayCon 2020 Free Virtual Summit Day 4: To view every OkayCon 2020 presentation click this link: weturnedoutokay.com/OkayCon2020 Also! Audrey interviewed me as part of her Facebook live series on getting through the coronavirus crisis : ) Click here to watch our conversation!   Key Links  An infectious diseases doctor shares what we need to know in the pandemic Audrey’s post on “how to have a closer family in five minutes a day” Audrey’s post “9 Secrets for Raising Kids Who Become Thriving Adults” Audrey’s Happy Campers Book Club (in Facebook) My essay, “YouTube is a dangerous place. Here’s how to protect your child” featuring the wonderful wisdom of kids-and-media-specialist Devorah Heitner The We Turned Out Okay Facebook group – and if you are a member, this link takes you to the watch party we had for this presentation in our Facebook group (with tons of wonderful insights and links from Audrey herself : )
28 minutes | 8 months ago
336: Listener Q&A – Sibling jealousy and Adoption
“Would you have any recommendations for books or anything that might help with learning the best ways to integrate an older adopted child into a family, or good books on adoption and advice?” “How to divide my attention between my 1 YO and my 4 YO… I try to give exclusive mummy daughter time but it’s never enough.” These are the first two questions in our Q&A series… I hope they are helpful! A Summer Camp program for you Towards the end of the episode I mention NPC Summer Camp, a new program I’m offering to help parents of young children not just get through, but live IN, summer 2020. Opening Ceremonies are this coming Friday! Spend your whole first month in my online coaching practice for parents (NPC) for FREE – exclusively for podcast listeners and folks in my email group – by clicking here (offer ends Wednesday, June 24, so enroll today!) Then you’ll be all set for summer camp! We’ll have lots of fun, keeping each other company and taking control of our family’s direction in this, a summer like no other. Camp activities are aimed at helping you enjoy family time even in this year’s difficult circumstances. Join now, spend your whole first month in NPC for free. I can’t wait to see you in our community forums! For the adoption and sibling jealousy links that come up today, click the following link: weturnedoutokay.com/336 And hang in there. We will get through this together! Key Links Enroll in the Ninja Parenting Community: use this link to join the community for free for your whole first month, and just in time for Summer Camp! Click here for Adoptive Families‘ article on how to integrate an older adopted child into your family. Click here for Adoption Circle‘s wonderful and gigantic list of books on adoption, for folks of every age from zero to adult. Click here for Siblings Without Rivalry, one of the best parenting books ever written! It’ll help you resolve those sibling jealousy issues that we discuss in today’s episode. Click here for WTOO episode 169, all about sibling jealousy and rivalry. Click here for On Mother’s Lap, a great book for helping very young children feel better about having a new baby in their lives.
76 minutes | 8 months ago
335: Why bother
I am super excited to bring you this conversation with Jennifer Louden, whose extremely helpful books (including the one we dive into today, Why Bother?), have sold nearly a million copies! Jennifer has been featured in hundreds of podcasts, magazines, and TV and radio shows – even appearing on Oprah. In today’s conversation you will learn: – How to really give a hoot about your life again – Why it’s crucial to LIVE in tough times, instead of just trying to live through them – Appropriate discipline for when your child gets into mischief (specifically writing on walls with magic marker, but what we discuss applies to whenever a kid gets into trouble) Go to jenniferlouden.com for answers to this question, posed there: “How do you bother after heartbreak, after creative and career defeats, after loss, after sidelining your dreams to pay off the debt, raise kids, or take care of aging parents?” But first, listen to our conversation! Need something positive in your life this summer? I’m excited to share a new program I’m offering: we are having summer camp in the Ninja Parenting Community! In addition to the courses, challenges, and other great stuff to keep you sane while raising your little kids, NPC Summer Camp includes: – Weekly camp activities that help you be a better parent, like making a vision board, or a “house rules” sign, or a treasure hunt to take kiddos on, or a “no occasion needed” fun family surprise – Supportive and fun Members-Only Campfire Nights – The sense of belonging to a community of people who get it, and who are along on this parenting journey with you NPC Summer Camp dates: Friday, June 26-Friday, August 7, 2020. Enroll now to enjoy family life this summer! Click here to join NPC! (NPC Summer Camp begins Friday, June 26, so jump in now!) Can’t wait to see you at summer camp! Click here to see this post in your browser : )
54 minutes | 9 months ago
334: How to raise anti-racist kids
I love this portrait of father and son, taken by photographer Blake Nissen and published in the June 7, 2020 edition of the Boston Sunday Globe. “It’s as if we are going through the 1918 flu pandemic AND the Great Depression AND the Civil Rights era, all at once.” That’s what James Arthur said on his podcast, Minority Korner, in (and about) Spring 2020. I think he’s right. To get through it all we are going to have to work together! That’s the spirit in which I bring you this episode. In this conversation on racial justice between my friend Shane Sams, and his friend Talaat McNeely, Talaat shares that we each must “Make change within our sphere of influence.” Well, my sphere of influence is in teaching parents like you how to get your family going in the direction you want. Today I link that idea up with getting this nation going in the direction we want: one in which everyone is treated fairly, and where parents don’t have to worry about their children being harassed, assaulted, or murdered because of how they look. I hope this episode, all about raising anti-racist kids, will help you make these crucial changes within your sphere of influence. FYI: Free live training course on raising good, kind kids – This week I’m doing not one but two live trainings, teaching on how a parent can change a child’s bad behavior to good… and one common mistake that well-meaning parents often make when trying to raise good, kind kids. (In other words, something that ups the bad behavior, when they’re trying to reduce it. It’s not a mistake you want to make.) Click weturnedoutokay.com/kind to sign up for the live trainings, this coming Thursday, June 11 and Sunday, June 14! Because of my white privilege, I have been able to insulate myself. I’ve been able to not see some important truths that have been right in front of me. I have remained ignorant, when I should have been seeking education. This week one of my friends, a white man from Kentucky, had an amazing conversation with one of his friends, a Black man from Chicago. Talaat McNeely and Shane Sams spoke for an hour and 45 minutes, and I was astounded and ashamed at the stories Talaat told. Things that have personally happened to him and his kids, just because of the color of their skin. I was: – astounded by the differences in our experiences, Talaat’s and mine, which only came about because he happens to be Black, and I happen to be white. No one should ever, EVER be treated the way Talaat and his family have been treated. – ashamed because I let it happen. The simple fact that it is happening means that I have not done enough to stop it. Talaat shares five key steps that we can take to stop racism. (I don’t remember to bring up the first and most important one until we’re almost at the very end of today’s episode, so all along you’ll hear me talk about four key steps… But that first one is most important. Talaat brings it up right at the beginning of his conversation with Shane. It’s something you hear me talk about on the show again and again, and I still can’t believe it took me until the last part of this episode to talk about it in connection with stopping racism.) There are about a million links today, so for those and a description of the five key steps we can take to stop racism – to raise anti-racist kids – click the following link: weturnedoutokay.com/334. We need each other now, more than ever. If you are reading this and you’re a person who (as the Black Panthers used to say) is Black or oppressed, you have my empathy, and my pledge to become educated instead of remaining ignorant about what has happened to you, and the part I have played in your troubles. If you’re a person of privilege, I hope that like me, you’re open to moving forward on the path from ignorance, to education. And from there to support. We will get through this together <3 Talaat McNeely’s Advice on How to Stop Racism 1. Stand in someone else’s shoes. In other words, cultivate empathy and always work to start from a place of empathy. (This is the one that I forgot to mention until the very end of the show! Still can’t believe that.) 2. Acknowledge. When we see, or do, something wrong, we must first acknowledge it and understand that it was wrong. If it was us who committed that wrong, we need to acknowledge it to take ownership, so we can move forward in setting it right. 3. Become Aware. Talaat underscores how important it is to have an awareness of someone else’s reality. As a part of this he says “don’t ask a person to relive their trauma.” 4. Take Action. Ask yourself, “what can I do to help?” Kids are outstanding at coming up with answers to this question, that we might never have seen. Be sure to bring them into this conversation! 5. Be Accountable. Hold people to their word, and do your best to hold yourself to your own. TONS of links! To sign up for the FREE live trainings I’m doing this week on how to raise good, kind kids, click weturnedoutokay.com/kind. Click here for “Let’s talk about racial justice!,” Talaat McNeely and Shane Sams’ YouTube live conversation. Click here for Talaat’s show (that he does with his wife, Tai, His and Her Money. Click here for Shane’s show (that he does with his wife, Jocelyn, The Flipped Lifestyle Podcast.) For the page of resources I put together on overcoming our biases, click weturnedoutokay.com/bias. Click here for Minority Korner, with host James Arthur. I have found this show (which is for grown-ups) super helpful in understanding US history and current events from perspectives other than my own. Click here for Real American, Julie Lythcott-Haims’ wonderful memoir which also helped me understand growing up in America from a different perspective than my own. Click here for the Parenting in Place Masterclass; Julie Lythcott-Haims, along with several beloved WTOO guests, will be helping parents through this upcoming summer. I’m signed up and I hope you will too! Click here for the Sawbones podcast episode on the Black Panthers, and here for the Sawbones episode on medical racism. Click here for the book Lies my Teacher Told Me. A seminal book for me, and also it turns out for Dr. Sydnee McElroy of the Sawbones podcast. Click here for “Two gentle and kind models for how to teach good values,” the recent parent newsletter I wrote on the anti-racist message delivered when Officer Clemmons, played by actor and playwright François Clemmons, soaked his feet in a kiddie pool along with Fred Rogers in Mr. Rogers Neighborhood. Click here for the documentary film Searching for Sugar Man, about an American whose music, listened to by white South Africans under apartheid, was equivalent to the Beatles in its revolutionary tendencies – and popularity. Yes, Rodriguez was bigger than the Beatles in South Africa, even though you’ve probably never heard of him. Click here for the Boston Globe article from Sunday, June 7, 2020, about a Black dad and his little boy taking part in a peaceful demonstration in support of Black Lives Matter. Click here for “When a parent’s leadership skills really matter,” the recent newsletter I wrote on how we can feel helpless in our own lives, our ability to control our kids’ behavior, and about world events and how we might play a part in alleviating suffering or injustice. Click weturnedoutokay.com/333-5, a bonus episode I did last week on the part that we parents play in ending racism.
14 minutes | 9 months ago
333.5: When you feel small, helpless, and afraid, listen to this.
(FYI: about 10 or so minutes in, I use the word “jackass” once or twice… it’s not enough for an E-rating, but I want you to be aware just in case you want to listen away from sensitive ears.) Hi Friends, I had planned for, and drafted, a very different kind of post today for you (I got about a dozen spider bites while sleeping Saturday night, and we’ve got a very large ant invasion going on in our kitchen; my abandoned draft was largely about these.) But as I wrote I realized how truly small and insignificant these concerns of mine are. There is a lot going on in the world, and a lot going on in the news. And I wanted to start the week off with a simpler message. I wasn’t sure what that message would be, except somehow I wanted to transcend the fear, the worry, and the struggles that we are seeing in the news, and even in our own homes. My family and I just finished virtually attending the closing ceremonies for the year at my son’s school, and the Executive Director George Popham teared up saying the following: “If there’s one important thing we should be doing, it is to put good, kind people in the world.” Immediately I knew that that was the message I wanted to share. This morning when I woke up, and even as I began to write this email, I was feeling helpless and small and afraid. (And itchy from spider bites, if I’m being honest.) Hearing George’s words made me feel much, much better. We have a really important mission, us parents: It’s to put good, kind people in the world. If we do nothing else – absolutely nothing! – besides this, I believe it will be enough. And if I can be helpful to you, as you are working on this mission, that would fulfill something deep in me. I have lots of ideas and experience working with young children, and spent nearly a decade working in an outstanding, cutting-edge preschool program. I earned my bachelor’s degree in Human Development and Family Relations, and later my master’s degree in Early Childhood Education. I’ve spent the last six years helping parents rein in their children’s bad behavior and truly enjoy family life. I know a lot about what makes kids tick, and how we can alleviate their bad behavior, and thus connect with them and feel happy within ourselves as we raise them. If we’re going to raise kind people, we can do that best by making our environment is positive and kind as possible. If you’re struggling with that, I hope I can be helpful for you! I just built a page on my website, weturnedoutokay.com/bias, where I gathered many of the resources that have been helping me learn to combat racism – a huge part of raising good and kind kids. I’ve also got lots of other free resources, including 332 back podcast episodes, and an entire Virtual Summit that I put on in response to the pandemic this past April. You can spend more in depth time with me each Wednesday evening by joining the WTOO Book Club, which is free to join, and can be free to read the book if the purchase cost is a barrier for you. And I am running a special right now, until this coming Wednesday, June 3, on entry into the virtual coaching practice where I personally help parents with their biggest challenges, trying to make this as affordable for you as possible. Lastly, if you’ve got any parenting questions at all I hope you’ll go to weturnedoutokay.com/contact and ask. We will get through this, together. Cheers, Karen
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