EVOLVING: EMBRACING FAILURE + REGRET S3:E35
Welcome to THE TRUE NORTH COLLECTIVE℠ PODCAST: SEASON 3! With co-hosts Rachel Bellotti (she/her) and Jenell Riesner (she/her), this is a gathering of un-sugar-coated conversations celebrating the untold stories of everyday people fearlessly finding and living their true north.
In our own search to discover and live from our TRUE NORTH, we continue to meet many interesting, courageous people from all walks of life, doing all sorts of amazing things to live life in their own unique way. Stories from all over the world. Stories with heart. Stories with grit. Stories with plot twists. Stories going untold - until now. This season, we celebrate these untold stories of everyday people who are fearlessly living their true north and inspiring each of us to do the same.
Today, we catch-up just the two of us, no guests, to share what we’ve been up to over the past four months. Much has changed in the world and we, like all of you, are also on the journey of self-discovery, learning what it is like to be true to ourselves over time and as life evolves. This year specifically has created so much invitation for shaking up our views of the world and we wanted to share how that’s all been unfolding honestly, organically, and without any rights or wrongs. We talk about being a performer, sitting with your reality, vulnerability hangovers, the wobbliness of growing and evolving into new versions of yourself, embracing failure + regret, proactively trusting, and learning into what’s truly important to you.
*note: this episode includes explicit language appropriate for those ages 16+
RESOURCES MENTIONED:
Some of our fav #amplifymelanatedvoices @sonyareneetaylor
Some of our fav #amplifymelanatedvoices @kierandthem
#amplifymarginalizedvoices @janellemonae
Human Potential Institute Coaching Certification
Saalt cup
Hoan Bridge in Milwaukee
Penny Berman - email for Reiki/coaching at pennyberman@yahoo.com
The Change Triangle book
Wingtip - “too scared to settle, too scared to try, feeling so feeble at the prime of my life”
Music from: https://www.jukedeck.com/
3 KEY TAKEAWAYS:
Wherever you’re at right now emotionally, can you allow yourself to sit in it? If you are used to avoiding, denying, distracting, or forcing forward momentum, what if you just stayed with what was coming up and see it through to the other side? Whatever our reasons for not wanting to sit with it, when we avoid feeling something, it just gets stored to be felt later. Over time that stored unfelt stuff gets bigger and bigger and we carry around that weight. Yet, if we just sit with it, welcome it (or if that’s too much, just acknowledge that you are with it) and allow it to share with you the experience of what it is, it will pass. Being humxn is feeling all of our humxness. We think that we can bypass the stuff that is “scary + uncomfortable” but we cannot. It’s always still there until we are willing to sit with it and experience a more full version of ourselves and realize we are ok, and then it will pass on.
As we inevitably evolve, know that it is ok to feel shaky with where you are in between who you have been and who you are becoming. You can have a sense of confidence and trust in the person that you knew you were back when you were them and hold onto that confidence while you experience wobbliness in the here and now as you find new legs and confidence in who you are today and who you are becoming. These contrasts are normal and a part of the process of evolving and growing.
What if we tried to fail as much as possible? What if failing was living? What if we celebrated putting ourselves out there, learning, growing, failing again, experiencing things, trying things, going for it, and being ok with it? What would you do if you knew failure was a part of the game of life? What would you do if you knew failure + regret were inevitable no matter how hard you try to avoid it?
TIME-STAMPED SHOW NOTES:
[3:30] Menstrual cup
[7:35] Jenell’s current + ongoing road trip adventure
[12:08] AD: We are so proud to announce that we just launched AMPLIFY, a mini-series from the TRUE NORTH COLLECTIVE (TNC) dedicated to highlighting the untold stories of everyday BIPOC fearlessly finding + living their TRUE NORTH amidst systemic realities - past, present, and future. This has been a really important project for us as we continue to learn + unlearn our own conditioning + bias; hear, share, and challenge ourselves to have new + uncomfortable conversations; and build a bridge that inspires action. Each episode will include a TAKE ACTION brought by our guest, so definitely check it out + get involved in a way that feels true to you. #amplifymelanatedvoices
[13:40] Owning where you’re at
[16:00] Vulnerability hangover
[20:20] Reality vs evaluation
[25:30] The Change Triangle
[31:00] The grieving process + evolving without shame
[39:00] What’s most important to you?
[41:00] Can there be an AND?
[47:00] Proactive trust vs blind trust
[49:00] Control/victim energy vs aligned/integrated energy
[50:10] AD: Did you know that we’re on YOUTUBE now?! With a year full of zooming, we thought it would be fun to show you our fun faces as we record. So, if you are more of a visual content lover, make sure to check us out on YOUTUBE. Enjoy!
[53:00] Failure + regret
[1:04:00] How to handle when a plan that falls apart
[1:07:00] Bravely choosing yourself
