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What is the lifespan of a mouse? How old is Stuart supposed to be? And most importantly, does Geena Davis know how to use a washing machine? All that and more will be answered on The Toni Awards today. Next week, we're talking about Cord, a move where Jennifer Tilly kidnaps a pregnant woman. Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Emily: @emakers7 on Instagram Jenny: @lejennymatthews on Instagram

Welcome to Amsterdam, where no one speaks Dutch or looks for missing children! Chase Hoffman (Comedy Late Night, Sunday Supper) and Bahlya Yansané (Anything But Standup, They Were Nice to Me) joined me, sans Jake, to discuss celebrity dick and Dick Maas. Next week, we're covering Stuart Little, which you may have forgotten Jennifer Tilly was in. Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Chase: @chaseahoffman on Instagram Bahlya: @bahlyathe3rd on Instagram Anything But Standup: @any.thingbutstandup on Instagram Comedy Late Night: @comedylatenight on Instagram Sunday Supper: @sundaysuppercomedy on Instagram They Were Nice to Me: @thenicestcomedy_ on Instagram

This week, the horror education of Jake Everhart continues as he finds representation in a Theatre Gay with a surprise earring. Next week, we're covering Do Not Disturb, the English language debut of a Dutch filmmaker who blends crime and camp. You can find it for free on Youtube I am so serious. Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Ryan: @curcieryan on Instagram Rendy: @rendyjones on Instagram, @rendy_jones on Twitter

Today we decide which 90s comedy darlings are Mario, Luigi, and Waluigi. The answer may shock you. Next week we're covering Bride of Chucky! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Jack: @jokereptile on Instagram, @realcoconutcrab on Twitter Amanda: @vscoa on Instagram, @croquetasytetas on Twitter

On this episode, we discuss feminism and bow at the feet of Stockyard Channing. Next week we're covering Liar Liar! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Nick: @nick.hornedo on Instagram Maggie: @big__maj on Instagram

On today's episode, Sheria teaches us how to be lesbians! It is important to note that we recorded this before The Bush, Brooklyn's newest dyke bar, opened in Bushwick. Next week we're covering Edie & Pen! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Sheria: @sheriamattiscomedy on Instagram, @sheriadidthat on Twitter Semi-Woke: @semi_woke_pod on Instagram, @semiwoke on Youtube

It is very important to note that this episode was recorded before Succession (season 4, episode 3) was released. Next week we're covering Bound! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Paige: @apaigesh on Instagram

This week, we review the first movie ever written by ChatGPT. Next week we're beginning our miniseries on Jennifer Tilly with her breakout role in The Fabulous Baker Boys! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter, @samala on Letterboxd Lexi: @lexishaye_ on Instagram, @lexishaye_ on Twitter, @lextalkmovies on Letterboxd

This week we challenge Jake's knowledge of the Walt Disney Empire and finally offer our thoughts on the Alec Baldwin situation. We also recap the first two episodes of Welcome to Chippendales! Next week we're catching up on Jennifer Lopez with Shotgun Wedding! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Mackenzie: @mackenzie_jaquish and @pretty_funny_comedy on Instagram Tim: @timmchalecomedy on Instagram

Today we make the grave discovery that John Leguizamo was not in Enchanted. Also on the docket: Disney's addiction to live action remakes, Wicked (the book), and Real Housewives of New York! Next week we're catching up on Juliette Lewis with the first two episodes of Welcome to Chippendales! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Rayne: @iblessthe_rayne on Instagram, @iblesstherayne on Twitter

In this episode we try to recast the movie with Succession actors and fail. Next week, we're catching up on Idina Menzel with Disenchanted! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter

On this week's episode we talk about Nope, awards season, Blonde, and Perfect Blue. I am a martyr btw. Next week, we're going to catch up on Toni Collette's filmography with The Estate! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Molly: @mollehhcarr on Instagram Rendy: @rendyjones on Instagram, @rendy_jones on Twitter

Today we analyze the strange alliances, family ties, and parking garages that plague the Dead-Fast Club. Next week, we're talking about Nope! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Belton: @belton.df on Instagram, @beltondeltoro on Twitter

I made two lovely people watch the worst NBC live musical in herstory. Listen to find out if they forgive me! Next week, we're talking about Scream: Resurrection! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Danielle: @femaleintern on Instagram Robert: @robertjohnstonformayor on Instagram

I think I googled the definition of camp in this one. Next week, we're talking about Grease Live! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Lee: @iwantpomeran1ans on Instagram Mitchell: @mitchelllippitt on Instagram

Today we're watching a bootleg of Keke Palmer in Cinderella on Broadway and debating the ethics of that! Next week, we're talking about Scream Queens! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter DJ: @djcollins2go on Instagram Chantele: @chantelesterling on Instagram, @chantiesterling on Twitter

Today we debate the merits of American Realism (aka any play written in the mid-twentieth century). Next week, we're talking about Keke Palmer's Broadway debut in Cinderella! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Franklin: @franklinmiller__ on Instagram, @francosworld_ on Twitter

This week we're talking shit on a horror movie that personally I thought was very fun! Next week we're talking about The Trip to Bountiful! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Maxim: @asaparaguts on Instagram, @maximofallen on Twitter Vikrant: @vikrant.s.c on Instagram

Today we recap Keke Palmer's episode of Grey's Anatomy and rank the men by hotness. Next week, Animal! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Sophie: @sophie.grace.clark on Instagram, @SGraceClark on Twitter Mackenzie: @mackenzie_jaquish on Instagram Pretty Funny: @pretty_funny_comedy on Instagram

Today we beg Jason Waterfalls not to go. Next week, Keke Palmer's episode of Grey's Anatomy! Befriend us: Pod: @thetoniawards on Instagram, @toniawardspod on Twitter Jake: @jakeheverhart on Instagram, @therealjakobeem on Twitter Sam: @samanthprosser on Instagram, @samanthprosser on Twitter Dan: @daniel_j_perafan on Instagram, @danieljperafan on Twitter Michael: @michaelpomeroy on Instagram, @michaelpomeroy on Twitter