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The Real HouseGuys Podcast: Season 2 Vol 16 Recap Dear Loyal 17 Listeners: With a heavy heart and a lighter wallet, tax time has taken its toll on The Real HouseGuys. G, QB3, and Cosell have come to the conclusion that much like Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin as well as Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner not to mention Peyton and C#%t Bumper … The Real HouseGuys are going to “consciously uncouple” and hang up their microphones as they re-join normal, middle-class suburban life … ok, that is sort of lie, there is nothing normal about these clowns .. The Guys have enjoyed the last 17 months recording from over 10 countries and 4 continents as well as QB3’s driveway, mud room, attic, and walk-in closet … Many new concepts have been bantered about – perhaps the saddest thing that will not happen is The Real HouseGuys College Football Bowl Game from Daytona Beach with topless cheerleaders and chugging contest between the two teams … Thank you for all the support as the RHG’s flexed their creative muscles and for supporting the many sponsors and causes highlighted in the show that are just too varied to list here. On behalf of G and QB3 – the Guys are very sorry for all the terrible gambling advice (although they do note that you get what you pay for …), and Cosell says you are welcome for all his picks … the main goal was to get a few good laughs. Special thanks to our guests, especially Dr. Dick Geared, Atticus Jackson, and Tim Livingston. Please remember that we are all dealing with the same bull shit out there, and that there are more of the “rest of us” in your offices, country clubs or even next to you on the plane than you might think … so crack a joke and share an inappropriate comment and keep laughing … or else you will snap! Keep both feet on the wheel and remember the most important thing is: THE POT IS RIGHT! G QB3 Cosell Season Record RHG: 0-0 Cosell: 0-0 Season 2 Vol 16…Play It Again! http://traffic.libsyn.com/realhouseguys/RHG-The-Pot-is-Right.mp3 Got Feedback or Ideas for a Show? CLICK HERE

The Real HouseGuys Podcast: Season 2 Vol 15 Recap The Real HouseGuys are dialed into the NCAA Tournament this year, but not for the reasons you might expect … Round 1 is one of a surprisingly long list of great daytime drinking opportunities. As the Guys go through the list, you have to wonder if they could just give us the days they aren’t hammered drunk … may be a shorter list! As this week’s title references, the highlight of the annual drinking cycle is Ron Jaworski eating wings, pounding beers, and hitting pretty girls with pussy willows as he celebrates Buffalo’s own version of Dyngus Day. The RHG’s ponder other deep thoughts such as – why don’t white girls get yellow fever? Finally some sports as the Guys pick up where they left off picking football games they clearly know nothing about to picking basketball games with teams they haven’t seen play. Cosell makes an appearance this week on his way to his speakeasy in Delaware. The ape picks a game and steels some money from G’s cookie jar on his way to the bus station. This Week’s Sponsors Sponsors: Numbnuts App – dare to monitor those racy photos your teen is putting out there on the line – if the government is looking at them, why shouldn’t you! The Rick Pitino Recruiting Kit – Learn the 3 C’s (of course “condemns” is one of them!) at www.FUNCAA.darknet “In the Nest” Bad Beat of the Week QB3 spending his weekend listening to a chorus of whistles at a volleyball tournament as he walks around with his noise cancelling headphone on … Can you say, “on the spectrum …”? Turd of the Week: Play-in Games – what is the point of these games again …? Frequently Wrong But Never in Doubt Picks: G: Agrees with QB3 regarding Jayhawks and Sparty, but Philly bias takes over with St Joe’s in his Final Four along with Xavier QB3: This casual College B-ball fan loves the premier coaching at Kansas and Michigan State, then goes all red-neck with Huggins and his Mountaineers as well as Baylor’s sneakers in his Final Four … Cosell: 12-5 upset … Pardon me boys, time to ride Chattanooga over the Hoosiers Season Record RHG: 0-0 Cosell: 0-0 Season 2 Vol 15…Play It Again! http://traffic.libsyn.com/realhouseguys/TheRHGSeason2Vol-15Dyngus-Day-and-Dengue-Fever.mp3 Got Feedback or Ideas for a Show? CLICK HERE

The Real HouseGuys Podcast: Season 2 Vol 14 Recap Beware the ides of March … The Real HouseGuys return from vacation and have plenty of material pent up from the last two weeks. G is concerned that we have front row seats for the apocalypse (see Donald Trump rally this week: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2016/03/10/trump-protester-sucker-punched-at-north-carolina-rally-videos-show/) – while QB3 just wonders how G still sucks at golf after a winter of lessons … With NFL Free Agency kicking-off, QB3 breaks down the numbers to conclude that the quarterback position is the “1%ers” of professional sports. The clipboard holders in the NFL are cashing out in a way that just does not add up in any rational way … with all due respect, this is nuts – especially since recent Super Bowl winners re-enforce the “defense wins championships” mantra, and QB’s make 20x the average O-linemen. In other news, Erin Andrews being recorded naked in a hotel room is worth nearly 20x a non-celebrity woman’s life … This Week’s Sponsors Sponsors: Spell Check Bullsh!t App – Time to take the pain to the support team! “In the Nest” Bad Beat of the Week The guy in seat 3B on G’s flight home to Philly Turd of the Week: Donald Trump … he will stay in this position until America wakes up and stops voting for this guy! Frequently Wrong But Never in Doubt Picks: G: You cannot buy a golf swing, but you can spend a lot of money trying to … QB3: Ventriloquists Cosell: The Real HouseGuys cannot golf better than Josh Scobee … are you kidding me?!?! Season Record RHG: 0-0 Cosell: 0-0 Season 2 Vol 14…Play It Again! http://traffic.libsyn.com/realhouseguys/RHGSeason2Vol-14Et-tu-Seacrest.mp3 Got Feedback or Ideas for a Show? CLICK HERE

The Real HouseGuys Podcast: Season 2 Vol 13 Recap The 2nd Annual Real HouseGuys Oscar Show kicks off on a sour note. While the fans of the show look forward to the Guys’ reviews and predictions regarding movies they have not seen, G brings his brand of social conservatism / fiscal liberalism to the first sponsor and puts everyone in a foul mood …. QB3 muscles through the rocky start to give his thoughtful analysis on a number of movies – Hey he at least took the time to watch the trailers! The RHG’s go back to a simpler time, when the staff of your local Blockbuster gave you a shelf of movie suggestions. Once again proving that all the great stories have been told, listen in for the suggestions of movies that are just like this year’s best picture nominees. Remember, QB3 loves a good romantic comedy or drama just as much as you do! This Week’s Sponsors Sponsors: The Republican Party Science “ish” Team – it is official: Size does NOT matter .. Kylie Irving Bed Bug Repellent – so much for OKC when KI hits free agency! “In the Nest” Bad Beat of the Week Ned Beatty vs Hillbillies / Leonardo DiCaprio vs Mama Bear Turd of the Week: Bridge of Spies / The Good Shepard Frequently Wrong But Never in Doubt Picks: G: Once again going with his heart over his head, Christian Bale with a bowl cut and The Big Short … QB3: If you are going to bet on something that some folks already know the outcome, then bet the heavy favorite THE REVENANT Cosell: a movie about lesbians wasn’t nominated … Wtf?!? Season Record RHG: 0-0 Cosell: 0-0 Season 2 Vol 13…Play It Again! http://traffic.libsyn.com/realhouseguys/RHGSeason2Vol-13Red-CarpetsHome-Rentals.mp3 Got Feedback or Ideas for a Show? CLICK HERE

The Real HouseGuys Podcast: Season 2 Vol 12 Recap We begin this week’s Real HouseGuys show with a very tight shot … You are not sure if this is the surface of Mars, a microscopic view of cells, or a close-up of an old shoe … As we zoom out and the audio becomes clearer, we hear laughing; hushed, private discussions of a serious tone; some Tupac playing in the background; ice being poured into buckets; tape being torn … Then the image comes more into focus. The accents are distinctly southern, but not cotton South, coal country …Now we see the picture, a fair haired, tall, thin but muscular, young man who is handsome – in the “guy from your high school” kinda way, not the “guy in the Ugg ads kinda way” – he is making faces and pointing down and there is louder laughter echoing off the concrete block walls. You can almost smell the pre-wrap and Ben-Gay … And where this picture started is this young man’s nut sack resting on the forehead of cherub faced young woman with a giant rack ..As soon “The People vs OJ Simpson” concludes, the RHG’s will be producing season 2 – “Bumper vs Peyton vs Good Judgement”. Yes, folks, the Real HouseGuys are digging deep. Our listeners expect the story beyond the story, and the Guys are so caught-up in “tea-bag-gate” (trademark pending) that they brought in their in-house counsel to provide some expert commentary on the law, sexual harassment, dick pics, and make sure he meets his billable hours target for the month (hey, February is a short month, even with leap year, and our man has to feed his family!). Atticus Jackson makes his way into the studio to save you all from the rants, raves and useless observations of the Guys and give some real expert analysis (he brought his briefcase for Christ’s sake!). Along the way, Atticus gives a shout out to Antonin Scalia and confirms that Clarence Thomas is the Godfather of sexual harassment law. Counselor Jackson goes on to let QB3 know that it is “ok” to sexually harass Mrs. QB3, and he reminds G that if you are “hung like a light switch” walking around with your fly open is probably not the way to pick up chicks … This Week’s Sponsors Sponsors: Peyton Manning Tea Bags – Go in dry, come out wet (did you expect anything less for these Guys?!?) Kanye West Relief Fund – Don’t let this dreamer, artist, American treasure fail … He’s a celebrity for crying out loud! Go to: www.wtfbailouts.org “In the Nest” Bad Beat of the Week Peyton Manning staying around long enough to become the villain .. Turd of the Week: An Assistant Athletic Director at UT giving a student trainer the name, “Cunt Bumper” Frequently Wrong But Never in Doubt Picks: G: Wake up folks – don’t let the media dictate what you think is important … Kobe Bryant raped a girl! QB3: The Penis Chronicles – does not make you gay, and it is fun for the wife! Cosell: Not Available for Comment – Contract Pending Season Record RHG: 0-0 Cosell: 0-0 Season 2 Vol 12…Play It Again! http://traffic.libsyn.com/realhouseguys/RHGSeason2Vol-12Bumper-To-Bumper-Penis-Envy.mp3 Got Feedback or Ideas for a Show? CLICK HERE

The Real HouseGuys Podcast: Season 2 Vol 11 Recap What can The Real HouseGuys say about this season they haven’t already said or you didn’t say about them as you make another deposit to young Mateo’s college fund – since his dad is your bookie … Cosell has officially filed for free agency – if some other podcast is searching for a nasty, drunk, smoker of an orangutang who has a certain sixth sense for picking games, let the bid war begin! Yes – it was a difficult year with the perfect end – The Guys finally talk themselves into Cam, and Peyton makes them pay for not trusting him after all those “bail-out” wins on a Sunday or Monday night during the regular season for much of the last 18 years … Ok, and great defense wins championship … Hell, let’s not blame anyone and just go pound Budweisers with Peyton (Eli has not been invited after that face!) and shotgun a Papa John’s pizza! The Guys do their best to break down another gambling mistake … QB3 does another borderline voice, and he provides an example of his halftime locker room speech to his 10-13 girls basketball… G is wondering if Roger Goodell was really seated in the reply booth during the game with his shoes off! Buckle up for a heavy dose of “useless banter” in coming shows … If you thought the RHG’s didn’t know sh!t about football, wait until the NCAA tourney starts! This Week’s Sponsors Sponsors: Mr. Dim Sum’s Toledo, Ohio “QB3 Room” – enjoy Deep Fried Red Ass” and the “Bitter Gambling Straws” as the black belt of bookies reminds you, “You no lucky today, mutha fukka!” Public Service Announcement: New Virus – the “Talib”. Look out as this virus impairs your judgment and may cause ridiculous “personal fouls” in your everyday life just as it it did to Aqib during Super Bowl 50. Please check your HGH and amphetamines to be sure they have been screened for the Talib virus. “In the Nest” Bad Beat of the Week RHG Gambling Rule: Defense wins championships … But we’ll take the Panthers anyway Turd of the Week: Toss up: Peyton Manning ending his playing career with a 2 point conversion; or, Peyton Manning ending his last on-field interview with, “I’m gonna get HAMMERED drunk on a whole lotta Budweiser’s tonight!” … or something like that … Frequently Wrong But Never in Doubt Picks: G: Taking a break from all this “thinking” … Makes his head hurt! QB3: Teaching grit and toughness to the suburban girls basketball players ages 10-13 …. Cosell: Filed for Free Agency Season Record RHG: 23-40 Cosell: 14-7 Season 2 Vol 11…Play It Again! http://traffic.libsyn.com/realhouseguys/RHGSeason2Vol-11PizzaBeerThe-Mendoza-Line.mp3 Got Feedback or Ideas for a Show? CLICK HERE

The Real HouseGuys Podcast: Season 2 Vol 10 Recap The Real HouseGuys are in Super Bowl mode as the football season comes to a close, and they are ready to dig into some numbers and (finally) make their final picks of a challenging year. The NFL cannot put a price on the 18 karat gold “50” that will be awarded along with this year’s Lombardi trophy, but a 30 second commercial spot will cost you $4.5 million … And with that extra nine plus minutes of commercials that has crept into the big game over the last 20 years, you will have plenty of time to get your drink on in case your team wins … And if you want to see the creepy results of that drunken, buffalo wing sauce night, check out theleadsports.com and the link to a very disturbing video …. http://youtu.be/9KqekigARfE G is on the ground in Denver this week, and he is not impressed with the level of intensity that one would expect from the great fans in Denver, which gets him thinking “if they’re not excited about their team, why should I risk my hard earned cash on them …” QB3 laments the fact that if you play in the AFC and your QB is not named Brady, Manning, or Rothlisberger (maybe, Flacco) then you have no shot at the big game based on the last 15 years …. Take that Ralph Mouth! The Guys are primed for the big game – while the Chimp is lost in an Uber car somewhere with Jerry Rice and a stripper named “DeDestiny” …. They are ready to make some picks and some memories at the unofficial national holiday known as Super Bowl Sunday! Be safe listeners … This Week’s Sponsors Sponsors: The NLF Player’s Association Escort Service – don’t end up like Ryan Murphy or Eugene Robinson, you are a PRO, stick with the pro’s pro … And don’t go home early and ashamed. Dim Sum for Dummies – Dr. Dick Geared authors a gamblers guide to “Chardonnay, hummus, and that talk with your spouse about being down a couple …” Not to mention how to spot a back door cover! If you wanna win some, you gotta dim sum (trademark pending). “In the Nest” Bad Beat of the Week QB3 in baggy ski pants, retaining water after a long night of Duran Duran, Adam Ant and cinnamon whiskey Turd of the Week: The Pro Bowl – but don’t fret Roger, G has the perfect solution – think Battle of the Network Stars … Frequently Wrong But Never in Doubt Picks: G: Panthers -5.5 vs Broncos – no one can stop Cam I Am … No matter what color he is! QB3: Over 45 – the big game has been over this number 6 of last 7 and there have been some good defenses in those contests Cosell: Panthers -5.5 – then the ape gets a break from these two morons …. Season Record RHG: 23-38 Cosell: 14-6 Season 2 Vol 10…Play It Again! http://traffic.libsyn.com/realhouseguys/RHGSeason2Vol-10-BLAAAAAACK.mp3 Got Feedback or Ideas for a Show? CLICK HERE

The Real HouseGuys Podcast: Season 2 Vol 9 Recap While this season has been Les Mis for The Real HouseGuys, that is still no excuse for QB3’s Wicked screw up. While he sat in the orchestra during Championship Sunday watching The Book of Morons (editorial license), the Guys missed action – yet again – on the scorching hot Panthers. Neither G nor QB3 could smile like Cam during that beat-down. The Panther Mr. Everything is certainly having fun, at least Baby Hands has ridden this wave … Gambling struggles aside – the Guys did do some homework on the numbers that count, and it appears the NFL and their sponsors will (shockingly) make out the best for Super Bowl 50. Peyton Manning and Cam Newton are numbers one and two respectively in endorsement dollars (now imagine Roger Goodell humming, “making money feels so good” to the tune of the Nationwide jingle …). Even though we are all sick of “discount double check” … Ok, those ads are still kinda funny … Rogers and Brady cannot keep up with the earners in the big game. Given the off week, G lets his Philly teams know that they “need to have a talk.” While he will always love them, he needs a break from all the losing, so he is planning a summer fling with a partial season ticket plan for, that’s right, the Amazin’ METS! I know you think he is a bad guy, but don’t judge until you have walked 40+ years in his shoes … The Guys remember the tall, dark eyed Abe Vigoda. QB3 breaks out his bass from his days as the front man for his high school band, The Queen City Ramblers, and plays the theme music from Barney Miller. The Guys are not sure if the man who played Tessio in The Godfather is the greatest Jewish actor to ever play a gangster, or if his death at 94 ranks with Bowie and Glenn Fry as the third celebrity death, but they are fans and respect the eye brows … RIP, Fish. Enjoy the break this weekend – the Guys’ record cannot get worse! This Week’s Sponsors Sponsors: amazon.com re-telling of a classic children’s story Cam I Am – could The Real HouseGuys love him in a tease … You better believe it! Fart Exhaust Pajamas – don’t take it from us, Kevin James raves, “it’s like having a catalytic converter right up your ass …” “In the Nest” Bad Beat of the Week Patriots’ pass blocking make Ware and Miller look like the stars of the next super hero movie … Turd of the Week: QB3 missing the deadline to get any action on the NFC Championship game … Frequently Wrong But Never in Doubt Picks: G & QB3: now that the Panthers are 16-1, these morons are giving serious consideration to picking them in the big game! Cosell: look at his record – the chimp got to the Bay Area early to make sure he has a good seat at the bar! Season Record RHG: 23-38 Cosell: 14-6 Season 2 Vol 9…Play It Again! http://traffic.libsyn.com/realhouseguys/RHG-Season2Vol9GreenEggs__Cam.mp3 Got Feedback or Ideas for a Show? CLICK HERE

The Real HouseGuys Podcast: Season 2 Vol 8 Recap The Real HouseGuys are again recording “On-the-line” from the Pacific Rim, while Hanoi G is officially added to the Homeland Security Watch List as a “suspicious character” given his mission to accumulate enough frequent flyer mile miles to eventually allow him access to the plane’s captain & cockpit like some weird plot twist in a George Clooney movie. After offering their sincerest condolences to Chiefs’ fans for their official introduction to the Giant Tomato’s fourth quarter playoff clock management, the Guys give a recap like only they can of a yet again undeniable intersection between sports & entertainment. After this week’s lastest NFL ref gaff during the coin toss of the Packers-Cardinal OT game, the RHG’s review for their audience some of the greatest “Flips” of their childhoods! While a banana hammock wearing Greg Louganis may have left women mistakenly spellbound at the ‘76 Olympics in Montreal, it was Flip Wilson, an African-American icon of 1970’s sitcoms who captivated the comic genius in G. Not to be outdone by a great speedo, who could deny that it was the 80’s feel good movie of the summer “Back to School”—a bewitching portrayal by Rodney Dangerfield of Thorton Melon, an affluent industrialist returning for a not too late-in-life pursuit of higher learning—and his son’s destiny to perform the family patented “Triple Lindy” flip? Finally, QB3 points out that despite being overlooked for a Daytime Emmy, it was The Young & the Restless character actor Billy Warlock who captivated him with a magical portrayal of Flip Phillips of the 1990’s Baywatch. While there is much work left in the playoffs, the RHG’s are delighted to see their beloved home team Bills & Eagles are not satisfied with complacency and already making bold moves to prepare for next season. While Eagles front office turns nostalgic and makes way for Andy Reid 2.0 (or Doug Pederson’s move from OC at KC to captain the ship), it’s the bold moves of Rex Ryan and the Bills organization that has QB3 at the edge of his toilet bowl seat. After the exciting relocation of the Mad Hungarian Rob Ryan to the Queen City, it’s the promotion of Kathryn Smith to Special Teams Quality Control “person” that has the world literally speechless. Who knew that NFL teams needed a Special Teams Coordinator, Assistant Coordinator AND a Quality Control expert?? Which begs the question, who takes the fall when the Holder forgets to turn the laces? Either way, as G reminds us from Tokyo, with cash in your pocket “You can get as Freaky as you want” This Week’s Sponsors Sponsors: The Larry David School of Chinese Etiquette: The Chat and Cut is the perfect way to offend your neighbors in any language The Eddy Lacy Nutri-system for Big Boned Backs. A great “weigh” to replenish calories on the road when a heat lamp Jumbo Pretzel Dog at the Mall is just not an option “In the Nest” Bad Beat of the Week Steelers last second FG against the Bronco’s to make it a 7 point game and cover the 8 point spread Turd of the Week: Foot fetishes on Barney Rubble feet Frequently Wrong But Never in Doubt Picks: G & QB3: Late in the season, the RHG’s double down on Brady’s 11-5 career record against Peyton Manning Cosell: Take Cam and the Gunslinger Rivera Season Record RHG: 23-36 Cosell: 13-6 Season 2 Vol 8…Play It Again! http://traffic.libsyn.com/realhouseguys/RHG-Season-2Vol-8-The-Triple-Lindy.mp3 Got Feedback or Ideas for a Show? CLICK HERE

The Real HouseGuys Podcast: Season 2 Vol 7 Recap It is back-up QB week so the RHG’s pay homage to holding the clipboard, the art of the hold, and baseball hats on the sidelines. QB3 offers a variety of insights into the mechanics of the hold and reveals his plans to utilize that last year of eligibility before jumping to the pros – while a broken down G only hopes he can be as lucky as Charlie “Clipboard Jesus” Whitehurst and find his own rich, damaged, reasonably attractive girlfriend … The Real HouseGuys are impressed by the way Ram’s owner John Kroenke “bootstrapped” his way up in the world by marrying the heiress to the Wal-Mart fortune and simply moving a football team from St. Louis to L.A. to increase his $7.7 Billion net worth by another two billion as the Rams increase in value based just on the announcement of the move. The only question is where will the franchise celebrate the 20th anniversary of the 1999 Super Bowl win in 2019 … actually, who cares … QB3 remembers Alan Rickman as the actor passed away this week with some of his favorite moments from “Love Actually” and confesses to taking Alan’s character Harry’s advice which lead to his marriage to Mrs. QB3: “Invite (her) out for a drink and then, after about 20 minutes, casually drop into the conversation the fact that you’d like to marry (her) have lots of sex and (little QB3’s) – warms our hearts to see the softer side of QB3 … We are not done yet, though – and the “gown-up” teams will battle it out in the Divisional Round of the play-offs. The Guys are just getting their stride, and expect to finish the year … that’s about it, just finish it! This Week’s Sponsors Sponsors: The Fart Ventriloquist – Avoid the embarrassment of being blamed for a stinky train car, and “throw the smell across the aisle so everyone blames “that guy …” Affluenza: medication for the troubled teen in your life “In the Nest” Bad Beat of the Week The Clemson meaningless TD at the end of the game for a classic Bad Beat, and a fitting end to the RHG’s 2016 College Football betting season … wtf! Turd of the Week: Rams crying poor and re-locating to L.A. Frequently Wrong But Never in Doubt Picks: G: Panthers -2.5 vs Seahawks – it is about time this podcast realizes that Cam and the Panthers might actually be good … QB3: Den -7 vs Pitt Cosell: Packers +7 @ Cardinals – the chimp is not afraid to take the points and leave the backdoor cover available! Season Record RHG: 22-35 Cosell: 12-6 Season 2 Vol 7…Play It Again! http://traffic.libsyn.com/realhouseguys/RHG-Season2-Vol-7-Clipboard-Jesus.mp3 Got Feedback or Ideas for a Show? CLICK HERE