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Up on the shore they work all day, out in the sun they slave away, while we devoting, full time to Airtasker, understanding our mental heath, Apedo In The Bushes and listing off our many fancy ‘show sponsors’ (Mother Lover, Casey’s cupcakes, Clark Rubber, hoarded cardboard etc).

Hello darkness my old friend, I’ve come to sit with you again and talk about Airtasker, Separation From Spouses, The Grates Reunion Tour and Mental Health.

Mel and Patience catch up! Things are going great, until the tax man invited himself into the conversation but don't worry, they soon dig themselves out of their crippling tax migraines and finish the show arm in arm. Awwwww.

If you’re our parents GO AWAY because we are talking about s e x and we don’t want you listening. If you are bad at sex or prematurely ejaculate, hell, this is the podcast for you. Oh, we also have a special guest, Steven Childs. Yeah, it’s pretty cool. That’s mostly all we talk about so I’m just going to promote all the things we have got going on outside this wonderful podcast! See Mel at the Melbourne Town Hall with her new show Up To Pussy’s Bow March 24th to April 3rd. Visit Steven at stevenchilds.com.au and go buy something from Southside Tea Room, Red Robin Supper Truck or Death Valley as a way to keep Patience and John out of centrelink ha ha ha

Almost a year on and there's still drama unfolding for both your protagonists. Did Mel avoid those parking fines? Who ruined Christmas Eve for Patience and John? Plus more intimate details of the lives of Mel and Patience.

Blocked milk ducts, vibrators, cabbages. Mel talks Maggie Beer(s) and The Great Australian Bake Off. Patience did a show with The Grates in Bundaberg. We discuss walking for anxiety.

Mel is home from the NYC! Patience is hated on and they pull a pretty swift, if not weird, trick on her and John. Baby Soda makes a cry. Other stuff too.

So it’s been a while! Patience’s third trimester of pregnancy has been and gone and she talks about her experience giving birth with Mel!

Pae and Mel have so much to catch up on. Patience radio pole. Ethyn’s life plan at 16. Katy Perry. Flying 29 weeks pregnant. Southside Tea Room expanding. Dream Team album making! Mel’s cyst. I’ll be there for you… when the rain starts to fall, I’ll be there for you, cos you’re there for me too. hashtag friends

Mel blows up about a night out gone half wrong which leads to a talk about service recovery paradox. Patience talks a little bit about pregnancy but not much has been going so, no news there. There’s a murder at Mel’s house. Mel feels more and more like a Southsider everyday. Patience's Mum has some name suggestions for her future whelp.

Patience and Mel, back in the proverbial podcast saddle. With mascot dog Todd, close by. Pregnancy talk. Yeah, you heard it, Patience is pregnant. Mel does a top shelf impersonation of every American podcast she’s ever listened to. Will you help us put together a ‘pro-natal’ for You’re Welcome?

Mel brings over her new baby girl Ruby (she’s like our silent unofficial 3rd host). Splendour In The Grass wrap up. Who was where, who saw what and where did Mel sleep? Patience had pixilated vision for the first time in her life. The girls have stuff coming up: this Saturday for Pae and somewhere in N.T. very soon for Mel.

Patience blew up at a Roma Street Parklands security guard on John's birthday. Mel's new segment 'How Does That Work?' covers refrigerated trucks. Patience got her hair did for free at Carindale. Watch out there's bad guys about Pae got a letter from the police.

What happened to the last 6 months? It’s an episode of reflection and buffalo wing revelations. Patience went to America. Mel went to all the comedy festivals. Did someone buy a dog? Does said dog like Barry Buttle? Thoughts on Fiji’s international airport. Lots of love! See you at Splendour In The Grass? Like, yeah.

Patience goes to a concert at the swampy, Brisbane Entertainment Centre. Who did she see? Mel lived her life for a week. Patience watched someone creepily from a bush, then wrote a sad song about the experience. Mel might have what it takes to fire a staff member without guilt. Fashion. FARRRSHUN baby.

The gals welcome one another. iPad games crisis. The Go Violets. Emergency hospital situations with silver linings. Maggie Beers. Zombies *swoon*. Vacuum robot pet. A You're Welcome emergency edition from... You'd never believe!

A huge catch up for the ladies Mel and Pae. Pae talks a lot, Mel listens with the ears of a good friend. Pae explains a trailer then Mel gives her fantasy trailer which is so moving Pae sheds a single tear.

Pae and Mel are back together! Barry Buttle collects trash and treasure on his motivated emu walks by the road. Patience is grosses police out with a piss pants customer. Mel likes horses and wants to rock horse wear as her everyday wardrobe. And much more, of course.

It's fate! After months of abandoned air, the golden girls Mel and patience want to thank you for being a friend! Mel got a job writing for This Week Live, up and moving suddenly to Melbourne, while Patience helps run Southside and tries to re-home 'fugly' ornaments permanently to letterboxes. Special guest Lanie Lane rested briefly with your two favourite host. Public transport and shorts are significant themes for discussion.

Welcome. Shroom success. Why Barry Buttle eats porridge everyday (like, for real guys). MelDonalds. Zines! Citrus from parents, and how childhood relates to said citrus. Does 'eyes covered for adults only content' delay puberty? Gossip and The Great Gatsby.