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That Was Disappointing...
55 minutes | Nov 28, 2022
Episode 126 of That Was Disappointing is Live. We’re thankful Tofurky wasn’t served at our table… Today’s Topic: Thanksgiving/Black Friday. We’re just as glad to be rid of the relatives as you are. Join Art and Lex, and their friend Ben, as they talk about a holiday (and shopping) that are a few days past, but at least we’re present for Cyber Monday. Maybe we’ll plan better for Hanukah/Christmas/Kwanzaa/Festivus. At the very least, we’ll need to stock up and glue and elbow macaroni for the presents. #hardknocklife TWD Tip of the Week: Every time Mariah Carey sings, an angel plummets off a bridge.
51 minutes | Nov 21, 2022
Episode 125 of That Was Disappointing is Live. For whom the bell rolls…though for us, a slide whistle would be more apropos. Today’s Topic: Death. Can we all agree that William Sadler killed it as the Grim Reaper? Join Art and Lex, and their friend Kelly, as they talk about where they’ll spend eternity. It’s well known all dogs go to heaven (well, maybe not Hitler’s dog), but I wouldn’t hold out much hope for your favorite podcast team. Might wanna pack the SPF 5000… TWD Tip of the Week: There’s only three constants in life: death, taxes and Spaghetti Tuesday.
53 minutes | Nov 14, 2022
Episode 124 of That Was Disappointing is Live. Yo, we’re goin’ old school! Today’s Topic: Master Debaters. If you say it quick enough, it sounds like a double entendre… Join Art and Lex, along with their friends Al and Ben, for this “very special episode” where they maybe/kinda/sorta go back to the roots of the podcast. Everyone brings a topic and debates it’s merits. It’s like the McLaughlin Group… meets Crystal Meth. Hell, Lex is so flabbergasted by the end that he even jacks up his weekly segment. #squadgoals TWD Tip of the Week: Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and to remove all doubt… dumbass.
41 minutes | Nov 7, 2022
Episode 123 of That Was Disappointing is Live. We need your reviews, like Lex needs a root canal. Oh wait! Today’s Topic: Dentistry. For when tying your tooth to a doorknob just doesn’t work. Join Art, Lex, and their frenemy Ben as they talk their not so pearly whites and how they came to this sad state. Well, most of them at least. Artholomew is quick to point out his teeth are impeccable as he sleeps next to his toothbrush, much to his wife Ashley’s chagrin. If only his make pattern baldness was so easy to handle. #aswingandamiss TWD Tip of the Week: Wayne Gretzky had three front teeth knocked out a week after getting his braces off. LOL
62 minutes | Oct 31, 2022
Episode 122 of That Was Disappointing is Live. That’s an ugly mask, homie. Kudos! Wait — what do you mean you’re not wearing one? Today’s Topic: Halloween. That one night of the year when we all get dressed up for a podcast. Mensa candidates we’re not. Join Art, Lex and a Who’s Who of their guests (seriously, who are they?) as they discuss chilling tales, such as the fact Election Day is right around the corner. Jinkies! As are Art and Lex’s birthdays. The sum of their ages puts them in octogenarian territory. Zoinks! But the scariest thing of all… the beating of that heart from beneath your floorboard. Or maybe you just need a new water heater? #PoeYouDidnt TWD Tip of the Week: Don’t eat any unwrapped candy or lick any yellow snow.
47 minutes | Oct 24, 2022
Episode 121 of That Was Disappointing is Live. We put the garb(age) into vint(age). Today’s Topic: Collectibles. Nipple tassels count, right? Join Art, Lex and their friend Michael, as they chat about the Crown Jewels of their individual collections and the agony of realizing it’s no longer in mint packaging. Survey says we all collected something or another (even boogers) as children, and odds are we through something away that was valuable… dummy. #backtothecoalmines TWD Tip of the Week: Your beanie baby collection is worthless.
40 minutes | Oct 17, 2022
Episode 120 of That Was Disappointing is Live. You’re gonna need a cold shower after this one… Today’s Topic: Personal hygiene. Why you’re coming to us for advice is anyones guess. Join Art, Lex, and their friend Ken, as they chat about their freshness or lack thereof. And hey, we cover fisting and hemorrhoids too. We’re a jack of all trades when it comes to advice. You should definitely jump off that bridge, BTW. #peerpressure TWD Tip of the Week: Last week’s suggestion was prophetic, so it’s worth repeating again, “Cleanliness is godliness. So make sure you wash your ass!”
38 minutes | Oct 10, 2022
Another Topic Grab Bag
Episode 119 of That Was Disappointing is Live. And now for something completely different… Today’s Topic: Hodgepodge Part XXVI (or thereabouts). From nuclear war to vacation plans, we’ve got you covered. You think we’re joking!? Join Art and Lex as they meet for their first-ever daytime convo. The former had (bull)shit to do, so our recording schedule was a little wonky (and sober) this week. Being a teetotaler sucks. At least we’re high on life. But not glue. 😞 #pickedthewrongweek TWD Tip of the Week: Cleanliness is godliness. So make sure you wash your ass!
48 minutes | Oct 3, 2022
Episode 118 of That Was Disappointing is Live. Our viewership is harder to find than one of those 12-foot skeletons from Home Depot. Today’s Topic: Fall. The one time of the year that wearing a hoodie is apropos… weirdo. Join Art, Lex, and their guests ex-producer Kenny (!), Ryan and Kelly, as they talk about the season that’s not too hot or too cold but somewhere in between. Here’s hoping you enjoy all two weeks of it before it turns into the dead of winter. It feels like the mild seasons (Fall and Spring) get shorter-and-shorter every year… kind of like your lifespan. #truthhurts TWD Tip of the Week: How do you leave an idiot hanging in suspense?
46 minutes | Sep 26, 2022
Weird Human Behaviors (Joe Has OCD)
Episode 117 of That Was Disappointing is Live. Answer: What is this podcast? Today’s Topic: Weird Human Behaviors. (aka Joe Has OCD) HA! See what we did there? R.I.P. Alex Trebek. Join Art, Lex, and their guests Ben and Kat, as they chat about some of the oddball things related to the human experience. For example, why did Lex’s laptop decide to crap out, making this a total shitfest of a recording session? Isn’t Kat too glamorous for this show? Why do we keep Ben around? And Art… never change. #dick TWD Tip of the Week: Every street has that one crazy neighbor. If your street doesn’t… *coughs*
41 minutes | Sep 19, 2022
Episode 116 of That Was Disappointing is Live. We missed a golden opportunity to use Ride of the Valkyries as our intro music… Today’s Topic: War. Shouldn’t all our tax dollars go into cloning Chuck Norris for this endeavor? Join Art and Lex (no guests this time as they’re all flower children) as they debate war… good thing neither of them has access to nuclear weapons. Hey, cooler heads will prevail in the world and we’ll all join hands and sing “Kumbaya,” right? For the record, we’re being facetious. But as long as one of us gets to ride an atomic bomb (*hat tip Dr. Strangelove*) in the end, can you really consider it a life wasted? TWD Tip of the Week: The Germans came close to developing plutonium during World War II. I did nazi that coming. *rimshot*
51 minutes | Sep 12, 2022
Episode 115 of That Was Disappointing is Live. Tell us more about this belly button lint collection… Today’s Topic: Leisure. As if you needed another reason to sit on your ass, ya oaf. Join Art, Lex, and their guests Ashley (the former’s despondent wife) and Kat, as they chat about their favorite hobbies, least favorite hobbies and everything in between. Like, did you know geocaching is a thing? I mean, you’re likely to get eaten by a bear but you do you, boo. To be fair, with the current state of the world, perhaps being Yogi’s snack would be preferable. #sweetoblivion TWD Tip of the Week: Margaritaville isn’t a song… it’s a way of life. Jimmy Buffett-4-Ever!
48 minutes | Sep 5, 2022
Back to School
Episode 114 of That Was Disappointing is Live. Alice Cooper sang, “School’s been blown to pieces.” We’re not gonna touch that one with a ten-foot pole. Today’s Topic: Back to school. Hey, are Trapper Keepers still a thing? Join Art, Lex, and their guests Ashley (the former’s despairing wife) and Ben (the latter’s frenemy) as they discuss the drizzling sh!ts that’s the academic calendar. Was everyone Pizza Day on Friday? Did any one else’s cafeteria serve Fiestata? Why did I write this in an empty stomach? And for that matter, can someone please let me out of the locker? #morethingschange TWD Tip of the Week: States still using corporal punishment (in schools) tend to be concentrated in the South… much like Whataburger.
47 minutes | Aug 29, 2022
Episode 113 of That Was Disappointing is Live. The meaning of life is not to die at your desk, right? Right!? Today’s Topic: Bad jobs. Surprisingly, fluffer didn’t make the list. Join Art, Lex, and their guests Kelly (yay!) and Ben (boo!), as they discuss some of the worse positions they’ve ever held. Remember when you thought nothing could be worse than school? LOL But hey, you’ve still got your youth (or not) and vigor (flaccid eggplant), so that’s something. How long is a socially acceptable time to cry in the shower? #TobiasFünke TWD Tip of the Week: The cemetery is full of indispensable people. Take an extra half hour for lunch.
42 minutes | Aug 22, 2022
Episode 112 of That Was Disappointing is Live. The Mothman predicted this podcast… Today’s Topic: Cryptids. Like Fox Mulder, we want to believe. Like Dana Scully, we’re skeptical and also hotties! Join Art, Lex, and their guest Miranda as they discuss the creatures that may or may not exist on the fringes of society. Hey, remember a hundred (or so) episodes ago when we watched a porno featuring Bigfoot. We’re not saying that special moment wasn’t the inspiration for this episode… but we’re not saying it wasn’t either. #callback TWD Tip of the Week: Be the cryptid you’d want to see in the woods. ❤️
47 minutes | Aug 15, 2022
Celebrity Sex Tapes
Episode 111 of That Was Disappointing is Live. Who ordered a sausage fest with a side of sexiness? Today’s Topic: Celebrity Sex Tapes. Rule 34. ‘Nuff said. Join Art and Lex as they welcome two guests this week (Al and Ben) for this very special episode. We’re bringing sexy back. Dad bods are in fashion, right? Hell, since we recorded this episode, Tommy Lee (not Jones) is in the news again for another picture of his wang. #topical TWD Tip of the Week: Milk, Milk, Lemonade, Around the Corner, Fudge is Made.
38 minutes | Aug 8, 2022
Alcohol and Hangovers
Episode 110 of That Was Disappointing is Live. We’re the black fly in Alanis Morissette’s Chardonnay. Better than a death row pardon two minutes too late… Today’s Topic: Alcohol and Hangovers. Hey, drink enough and I promise you we’ll both start to look good. ❤️ Join Art and Lex and guest Kevin as they chat about booze and it’s aftermath. The former we can’t get enough of, the latter makes us hate our existence… until we decide to imbibe again. It’s a very abusive relationship. Just like the one we have with our listener-ship. Would someone please email us at firstname.lastname@example.org!? #prettyplease TWD Tip of the Week: “Red sky at night, sailors' delight. Red sky at morning, sailors take warning.” You’re welcome, homie(s).
44 minutes | Aug 1, 2022
Episode 109 of That Was Disappointing is Live. Yeah, 6-hour car rides are the pits, but you could spend that time binging our show. Try not to laugh so hard you run off the road! Today’s Topic: Vacations. “I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth.” We’re so sorry… Join Art and Lex and new guests Anastasia and Michael as they chat about vacay. You know, the thing we save up hundreds (if not thousands) of $ for every year, only so we come back home more exhausted than we were to begin with. And we have to spend it with family members too. #notsofriendlyskies TWD Tip of the Week: You have a better chance of being eaten by a bear while camping than you do winning the Mega Millions jackpot. Cha-ching! Be sure to catch Michael on “Snake in the Grass” on USA!
44 minutes | Jul 25, 2022
Episode 108 of That Was Disappointing is Live. We’ve got more staying power than Pan Am. Today’s Topic: Air Travel. The TSA agents have given us more action than we’ve seen in a long, long time. Join Art and Lex and new guest Miranda as they chat about everyone’s least favorite part of vacation. I mean, unless you prefer endless layovers and paying hundreds (if not thousands) of dinero for a bag of peanuts, thimble full of cola and zero leg space. Speaking of Miranda, it’s Art’s worst nightmare… she’s a fellow “BBJ” practitioner like Lex. This podcast has finally become everything our dim-witted cohost ever envisioned. #bjj4life TWD Tip of the Week: You didn’t really lose your luggage; your luggage just found a happy home.
37 minutes | Jul 18, 2022
Episode 107 of That Was Disappointing is Live. Hey, did you know it only took the deadliest pandemic in a century to bring us into your homes? Today’s Topic: COVID-19. This thing has more staying power than Justin Timberlake! Join Art and Lex as they chat about the longest two weeks to flatten the curve ever. Oh, those blissful days of yore when everyone gave each other a six-foot berth. How we romanticize that time… because we’re anti-social, get it? #wockawocka TWD Tip of the Week: The Yo Mama variant is very disappointed about your life choices… also her belt size is equator.
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