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Soft Tattooed Millionaires
48 minutes | Jul 2, 2018
Brave New World Cup
No Spain. No Argentina. No Germany. No Portugal. No.....Senegal. This week on STM, we break down how Mexico can continue this streak of giant killing against Brazil.
44 minutes | Jun 25, 2018
Personal Goals vs. Mexico Goals
Yes, we love Mexico. We also love the US Open Cup, and the fact that the MLS season is halfway done, but DC United has only played 12 games. On this episode, Jack and Max recap CONCACAF's performance so far in the mundial, and discuss how to play it cool when someone gives you an amazing nickname.
42 minutes | Jun 11, 2018
WC Preview: 7 Good Players on Bad Teams
This week, STM chooses 7 players on bad teams that you should be watching this World Cup. Much love to both Iran and Morocco. Also, Max and Jack discuss the likability of Englishmen.
26 minutes | May 29, 2018
The Hoop Has Been Lowered
A quick, lunchtime pod for y'all. Max and Jack discuss USA's 3-0 win over Bolivia, and what we can all expect to see in Ireland on Saturday.
40 minutes | May 21, 2018
USMNT Roster, Death in the Family, and MLS Coaches Abroad
After a long weekend near the Canadian border, Max and Jack return to discuss the USMNT roster. Furthermore, the two idiot brothers manage to insult all soccer fans in the process. Enjoy!
28 minutes | May 20, 2018
Wayne Rooney to DC, Curt Onalfo as GM, and the fizzling of Zlatan. It's a cheerful one today.
59 minutes | May 7, 2018
Clint and Bradley for USMNT
After a two week hiatus, Max and Jack return to discuss the starting 11 vs. Bolivia. STM also has the obligatory pro/rel discussion, and dishes out their picks for next USMNT manager. Open your hearts to The Deuce.
42 minutes | Apr 16, 2018
Toronto FC = Korean Baseball
What do Toronto FC and Korean baseball have in common? Turns out, plenty. This week on STM, Max and Jack discuss FC Dallas, the Utah Royals amazing home support, and the Gianluca Busio.
31 minutes | Apr 9, 2018
Michael Bradley Has a Mural in Chicago
Disclaimer: We recorded this before the LA Galaxy game, so whatever Zlatan has just done, we missed it. Anyways, Soft Tattooed Millionaires are back and ready for round two of CCL. What we are not so prepared for is Jason Kreis being a giant d bag to his fans.
27 minutes | Apr 6, 2018
Interview with Tim Myers
There is no more essential reading in American soccer right now than Tim Myers', "Quiet Lies," and "What's the Truth." Both reports detail the myriad ways in which the MLS and Anthony Precourt have manipulated the narrative around the good city of Columbus. This is not just a pod for all those involved in the #savethecrew movement, but rather for anyone begging for more transparency in the game.
40 minutes | Apr 2, 2018
Shane Black's Biopic of Rocco Commisso
USMNT vs. Paraguay. The resurrection of Zlatan. STM is here to help you process the week you've just had as a fan of American soccer. Plus, Max and Jack ask, "Is there such a thing as a good soccer movie?" The answer is no, not really.
27 minutes | Mar 26, 2018
Wicked Banana Bend
In this week's episode, Max and Jack talk NWSL, Zlatan, and some seriously bad TV announcers. There's plenty to stay positive about American soccer, though, and STM is here to make sure your glass is always half full.
25 minutes | Mar 23, 2018
Update from Austin, TX
Parks and Recreation has lied to us. City councils are actually really boring. Ask anyone in Austin. Or you could just ask MLS in Austin spokesperson, Derek Ensign. Luckily, this is exactly what we did. On this pod, Derek gives us a general status update on the MLS coming to Austin, and we engage in some light day dreaming about Mexican superstars playing in Texas.
49 minutes | Mar 19, 2018
Athletes aren't Cool
Who is the coolest player in the MLS? STM try to wrap their heads around this scourge of lameness, all while reminiscing about bunk beds and potentially life-threatening illnesses.
52 minutes | Mar 12, 2018
You like goals? We got your goals right here, pal
Holy crap! Jack and Max are blown away by just how entertaining the CCL has been this year. STM discuss the Red Bulls' CONCACAF-y victory over Tijuana, and bask in the glory of all 38 MLS goals from the weekend.
53 minutes | Mar 6, 2018
CCL is Dope, Get Over Yourselves
Max returns from Santa Fe, Jack recaps MLS hijinks, and both boys discover something about themselves along the way. Turns out, CCL is actually everything they've ever needed.
18 minutes | Mar 3, 2018
Liga MX, we love you so
Jason Marquitz, producer of the Mexican Soccer Show, joins STM this week to talk about the suspension of pro/rel in Liga MX. Jack also attempts to break a world record.
41 minutes | Feb 25, 2018
MLS Preview and Prediction Show
Harrison Crow, of American Soccer Analysis, joins us to preview the MLS season. We discuss which teams could possibly overachieve, and talk about which sides might be not quite as advertised. Who are our picks for the top of the table, and who's going to win it all? If you need to look smart in front of your soccer-loving friends, this is the pod to listen to.
27 minutes | Feb 19, 2018
Post-Breakup Eric Wynalda
Max and Jack highlight the achievements of some of our best and brightest, all while trying very hard not to rattle Eric Wynalda's cage.
34 minutes | Feb 10, 2018
USSF Presidential Election
STM gives their rapid reaction to the USSF presidential election.
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