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52 minutes | 7 days ago
EP 49: FINDING FREEDOM IN (M)OTHERHOOD | Leisse Wilcox
How do you process being single? Do you feel frustrated, doubtful, even shamed? In this episode with transformational mindset and relational coach Leisse Wilcox, we take a deep dive into where that shame comes from, whether it's internal or external, and what you can "do" (and not do) about it. And since we celebrate Mother's Day this month and Leisse is a mother of three herself who also happens to be single, we approach the topic of "otherhood".... what happens to us when we fill or don't fill society's expectations of us to be mothers? Listen in to Leisse's gorgeous guidance and words of encouragement as we navigate these tricky feelings... we promise you'll feel better on the other side. Learn more about Leisse here! Buy here book here! Listen to her podcast here
48 minutes | 19 days ago
EP 48: PRINCIPLES OF POLY DATING
Have you been wanting #single to chat with a pansexual polyamorous/ ethical non-monogamist sober stand-up comedian? Well, your prayers have been answered!! Listen in as I chat with Lisa, a delightful gem of person, on all of the unique dynamics of polyamorous dating... on apps.... in a pandemic....including what exactly it takes to be in a healthy multiple partnership (spoiler: it's all about communication). We also talk orgies and Lisa's genius new idea for a bi/ poly dating app... wait for it... it's called PANCE.. and we're here for it. :)
49 minutes | a month ago
EP 47: PLAYING WIHOUT A PARTNER | Dr. Megan Stubbs
There's a lot of books for single people about dating. And a lot of sex books that are written for couples. Sooo..... why aren't there any sex books specifically written for single people? Enter Dr. Megan Stubbs, aka the "single sexologist," whose soon-to-be released book, "Playing Without a Partner," was written just for us on the topics of confidence, contentedness, fulfillment, and yes, sex in singledom. What's it really mean to be alone? How can this time be beneficial instead of detrimental? How can we live whole, full lives, experiencing all life has to offer as single people? These answers PLUS fun sex facts you never knew you wanted to know about, like things that don't mix well with semen, and cum that tastes like... bleach??? Uhhhh.... All this and more, hope you enjoy! :) Learn more about Dr. Megan here. Buy Megan's book!
52 minutes | 2 months ago
EP 46: THAT POWER DYNAMIC
You've dated a douchebag. Right? We all have. There's no avoiding it. There seems to be a plethora of dbs out there in the single world, especially in this crazy time of Covid. if y'all thought dating in New York is bad.... we clearly had no idea what we weren't missing until I started talking to Mona, a badass comedian living and dating in LA who has got dating stories that will blow your mind. It's one thing to try and date people in the entertainment industry who are just trying to use you to grow their following or ask you for a referral.. but it's another thing altogether if you're a female comic. Cause if there's one thing that intimidates guys, we've learned it's a woman who unapologetically speaks her mind. And if she can make people laugh? Forget about it. She's unstoppable. Shout out to Who Haha for connecting me with Mona and her friend Jonathan. We had the best time laughing and educating ourselves about all sorts of sex terminology. Plus, Mona has got a dating story for the ages guaranteed to give you goosebumps...you don't want to miss this episode!
50 minutes | 2 months ago
EP 45: SINGLE IS THE NEW BLACK | Dr. Karin Anderson Abrell
Let's talk about single shaming. Chances are, you're been victim to it at least once in your life. You've been told, directly or indirectly, that since you're clearly so fabulous and still single, that you simply must be doing something wrong! You're too picky. Or you're too thin. Or too loud. Or too desperate. The list goes on and on. And who are the people most likely to be using this disparaging language on us? Our friends. Our family. Even our own mothers. To be fair, it's not really their fault. They have been indoctrinated for decades with society's belief that a woman's worth is determined by her relationship status. But Dr. Karin and I are not havin that, and we take a super deep dive discussing all this and more from her acclaimed book, "Single is the New Black: Don't Wear White 'Til It's Right," as well as her experiences from her background as a psychology professor for ten years in Chicago, as well as from her time being an accomplished (yet single) woman in her late 30's. It's a super juicy episode so buckle up and put on your women's empowerment body armor for this excellent episode helping us celebrate International Women's History Month! Learn more about Dr. Karin here. Work with Dr. Karin here. Follow Dr. Karin @dr.karin on IG for all sorts of love, fabulous conversation, and advice!
62 minutes | 3 months ago
EP 44: DATING AMNESIA
Ever had that thing where you're chatting with someone on a dating app and it all starts to feel a little.... familiar?? I'll be the first to admit that I've started conversations with people I unmatched previously without fully realizing it at first, but unlike my guest Robin I'll eventually let the guy know what's up. Robin however, likes to see "how far she can take it" lol before a guy will figure it out and sometimes.... spoiler!... they never do!! This has led her to have some seriously weird dating situations. Do men have dating match amnesia when it comes to swiping? Our VOP Jason weighs in on this and more, as we trade perspectives on what women look for in a dating app versus what men look for, and we FINALLY get answers as to why dudes send dick pics. I leave Robin and Jason with a challenge: they have to take the other person's suggestions for changes to their profile and keep them in place for thirty days. Can't wait to see what happens!
51 minutes | 3 months ago
EP 43: THE INTERSECTION OF FEMINISM + DATING | Teresa Thomas, M.S.
Have you ever struggled with reconciling the equality you want in a relationship and the empowerment you have in your life with dating online? .... Okay - that sentence might have just blown your mind a little bit. But in this episode I'm joined by life & relationship coach Teresa Thomas, M.S, who's here to tell us that the way we identify ourselves and the things we want don't have to be mutually exclusive. As a person who identifies as a Black feminist, she understands that society can often make you choose between your identities and your desires, but dating can be inclusionary and can uphold your individuality... if you make space for it and know how to look for what you want. This episode is chock full of such beautiful inspirational wisdom and it's our honor to have Theresa as our guest for Black History Month... yeah that's right, we chose to celebrate Black History Month over Valentine's Day on #single and we couldn't be happier about it. Put on your big girl panties, it's time to get your feminism on! Learn more about Teresa here. Work with Teresa here.
55 minutes | 4 months ago
EP 42: DATING HALF YOUR AGE PLUS SEVEN
Be honest: what's your age on your dating profile? Now, be even more honest: what's the age range you're looking for? Is it your own age, plus or minus five years, or are you consistently looking for people younger than you? My 1:1 guest this month, Grace, has an amazing range she's open to - guys ten years younger AND guys ten years older... which means she can potentially match with guys in their late 20's or even in their 50's, and you'd be surprised how much the kinds of dates differ between the two. If Grace's voice sounds familiar to you, it's because she's been on #single before - last January Grace joined us as a Guest Expert! Grace is a fantastic online dating specialist and coach at agoodfirstdate.com, and she's also single, so as a coach she really gets what it's like to be out there swiping in COVID and she shares some of her own insights from dating virtually in 2020 in this episode Aaaaannddd... drumroll please! Grace has very kindly created a super special offer for #single listeners! If you feel like you could benefit from some of Grace's wisdom you're in luck. She's offering a FREE 30 min coaching session with her to the first five listeners - yes, you read that right, so hurry up and respond ASAP using this link: bit.ly/singlepodcastGrace We can't wait for you guys to connect - let us know how it goes!!
43 minutes | 4 months ago
BONUS EP: #single x GIRL AND THE GOV
BONUS EPISODE!! With this month's inauguration and allllll the intense politics of this month and the past year (woof), we wanted to bring you a bonus mash-up episode with two very awesome who host innovative political podcast Girl and The Gov, who just so happen to be single :). Sammy and Maddie created Girl and The Gov podcast to provide a platform for young women to engage with the evolving political sphere in an approachable, digestible, and accessible way. We're super on board with highlighting women in the political space and all for establishing a place to amplify female voices. And since these badasses are single, we thought it'd be cool to exchange ideas about the intersection of dating and politics - like, when is it okay to introduce politics on a date (or better yet, how it possible not to, given everything?). How do you screen for values that might not align with your own... and can you even match with someone with opposing views in today's culture, or is it just too divisive? If you're politics-curious and want to dip your toe in, Sammy and Maddie's podcast is such a great resource for those who want transparency and facts given to you in your own language. Can't wait for these women to take over the world... and maybe even go on a decent date or two :). Find out more about them here. Follow them here. Listen here on apple podcasts
51 minutes | 4 months ago
EP 41: SINGLE. THAT DOES NOT MEAN...
Prepare to be showered by the goddess wisdom of Acamea Deadwiler, accomplished writer and author of "Single. That: Dispelling the Top Ten Myths of the Single Woman" which we're officially claiming as the #single podcast manifesto!! Ever been called lonely, desperate, sexually frustrated, bitter? Chances are you've been labelled or accused of at least one of these things one time or another - just because you're single. What's up with that? Why does our culture make such negative assumptions about us because we're not partnered up? Acamea and I get deep into our introspection and analysis of the things in our society that have allowed single stereotypes to perpetuate and dismantle them one by one. If you need 45 minutes with a strong, intelligent, inspiring female author to set you up right for 2021, this episode is for you. Learn more about Acamea here. Buy SINGLE. THAT on Amazon here: Or support female, black-owned NYC indie bookstore The Lit. Bar by buying it here.
50 minutes | 5 months ago
EP 40: THE DATING APP TIME WARP
If you've ever felt frustrated or out-of-sync with the speed which your matches want to move, you're SO not alone. The timing of everything - from when to move off the app, when to trust someone with your phone number, when to meet up, and when you're ready to send sexy texts/ pics doesn't just vary from person to person, it seems like it varies greatly between men and women. My guest Jessica and I discuss why is it that men seem to want to talk to you like you're their girlfriend when they haven't yet put in the time or effort to even meet you. We also check in with our VOP Karl who's over in England to talk about his experience with different speeds on both sides, and how long distance relationships come into play in this whole equation. If you've ever been called "sweetheart" before you're someone's actual sweetheart, this episode's for you... and be sure to stay tuned to our thirty-minute mark, where Jeanette shares an audio surprise you won't want to miss! :)
51 minutes | 5 months ago
EP 39: ISO: BUSINESS PARTNER FOR LOVE
When it comes to dating apps, are you winging it? Swiping right with abandon or whenever someone seems cute or sane enough to have a conversation with? That might be a good starting point but you may find that ultimately there's not enough to sustain you, and that's because you're not dating strategically. April Davis is the founder/ president of Luma, a privately-owned matchmaking firm with 40 locations across the US. A certified life coach as well, she coaches her clients on the one thing she sees that's missing in today's dating culture: value and goal-based dating. Plus, she shares with us her tips on how to negotiate the emotional minefield of being single during the holidays!! Don't miss this final guest expert episode in our matchmaking series. We've had a blast getting to know all these incredible women and we hope it's illuminated the process and made you curious about working with a matchmaker in 2021. Let us know how it goes! Learn more about April here. To join the Luma database, click here.
52 minutes | 6 months ago
EP 38: POWER COUPLE DREAMS
Picture this: it's a bright, warm, Hallmark-movie day... you're out running errands (with your mask on, natch), popping in to the post office and dashing off to Trader Joe's when you decide on a quick coffee stop... where you spot a cutie waiting for his oat milk latte. Your eyes meet across the room. He smiles (or at least... his eyes kinda crinkle above his mask)... you smile... and then... and then what? Not exactly sure what comes next cause that just doesn't happen to you? We're in the same boat. How many times has anyone actually ever had a "meet-cute"? Certainly it's been harder to do in Covid. Our guest Sarah is a master at the meet-cute, but is struggling on the apps cause guys just don't seem to be seeking the thing she's looking for, which is: brains. In this time of isolation and virtual connection is it easier or harder to connect intellectually? We ask our VOP Michael to weigh in on whether men fantasize about being a power couple as much as smart women do. If you're a woman bored of being called "Gorgeous" (capitalizaton intentional) and asked about your weekend instead of what you're reading, you'll love this episode where we discuss relationships that leave a mark and why you should never go out with a guy who picks you up at a gas station.
46 minutes | 6 months ago
EP 37: PREPARE TO SHARE YOUR BAGGAGE
What's your "baggage"? Divorced, STIs, single mom of three kids, intimacy issues? Our two experts - Michael Naisteter and Jaime Bernstein - are pro matchmakers from company Three Day Rule with backgrounds in sex positivity/ education and coaching the transition from co-parenting to single parenting. They share their wisdom & insight with us on how to hurdle the barrier of facing your scary perceived baggage with someone new by knowing your value and doing the prep work needed to have these kinds of conversations. As Jaime says, "Part of being an adult and being able to grow and move forward and have successful interactions and relationships is having difficult conversations that are awkward and are uncomfortable, so I think you have to stop hiding behind the excuse that it's too scary. Your life will be better on the other side once you face that fear." If you agree that these positive ladies are just the bees knees and want them in your life, sign up for a profile at https://www.threedayrule.com/work_with_us. Learn more about Michal here Learn more about Jaime here
55 minutes | 7 months ago
EP 36: HEALTHY, ADULT DATING
Did you ever get to that point in a relationship where your higher, smarter, grown self just sorta knew that you had to walk away cause it wasn't working out? Not because you didn't love the person, but because a part of you could see that they weren't willing to work on their shit (while you've been working on yours all this time) and you knew that without that link, the problem wouldn't fix itself. It takes a GROWN-ASS WOMAN to truly know her whole self, and know her full value to walk away from what's not working. Cause this dating stuff isn't for the birds. It challenges you in ways you never thought possible. And it teaches you too, about what you like and don't like, about what's important to you and what's a dealbreaker. My guest Lindsey will inspire the heck out of you to take a deeper look at what you need, what triggers you, and what you ultimately deserve so that you approach dating from the happiest, healthiest place possible. :)
50 minutes | 7 months ago
EP 35: INVEST YOURSELF FULLY
Excited to bring you our third episode in our Meet a Matchmaker Series! Meet Tammi Pickle, VP and Partner of Elite Connections Matchmaking Agency which has been a female-founded, family-based (we're talking Tammi's mom!) company matchmaking singles since allllll the way back in 1994!!! That's right - from matching by snail mail into the digital age, Elite has now grown up to thirteen (!) offices nationwide and internationally. If that isn't a success story of female vision, leadership and badassery, I don't know what is. Tammi shares with us her insider knowledge from working with and around her mom since 2000, including whether dating in the US is harder than in other countries, how to become a priority and not an option, and leaves us with her top three "Don'ts" for dating in 2020. If you're thinking about working with a matchmaker or even if you just wanna join their massive database, you can check them out at www.eliteconnections.com to speak to Tammi or one of her associates. Tell them #single sent you and for goddsakes tell us what happens!!!
60 minutes | 8 months ago
EP 34: WORLD TRAVELER OF MEN
#single is going international y'all!! It's our very first episode featuring a single guest from another country and we're so excited to get down and dirty about dating in other cultures. Jeane, originally from Singapore, is a New Yorker celebrating her 10th anniversary here (woohoo!), and invited her friend Govin from Malaysia to join us virtually - and there is *such shade* thrown between a Singaporean and Malaysian it's a good thing everyone is sheltering in place in their homes!! haha Jeane brings a unique perspective of dating, from her upbringing in Singapore to six years in Australia, back to Singapore and now residing in the US, but of course a lot of universals remain, like... oh, getting set up by your mom on dates and wondering why the hell guys who like you criticize you for your looks??? LOL. We also talk about how our parents' relationship influences our dating fears and expectations as adults. If your parents have a rocky relationship, does that shake your core belief in finding happiness for yourself? We hope you dig this cross-Atlantic episode and we WANT MORE, so if you're living in another country and single, hit us up!!!!!
44 minutes | 8 months ago
EP 33: GETTIN' NERDY WITH DATING DATA!
Have you ever thought about your app response rate? How about your message-to-conversion rate? Have you ever done a controlled experiment to see what exactly elicits a response? Nah, me either. But Erika Ettin, online dating coach and founder of coaching service A Little Nudge, has. In fact, with a masters degree and a background in finance, she loves to get downright nerdy with her dating data. Dating is, after all, a great experiment, and Erika joins #single to share her tips, ideas, and suggestions to set you up for success, and how to handle dating in Covid, even answering some listener Q's for us at the end. We hope you love Erika and her advice as much as we did - if you wanna learn more about working with her, you can learn more here! Erika Ettin is the founder of A Little Nudge, the leading online dating coach in the US. She has helped hundreds of clients in the US and abroad. Ms. Ettin currently writes a regular dating column for Philly.com and JDate, and has published "Love at First Site: Tips and Tales for Online Dating Success from a Modern-Day Matchmaker." She currently lives in Washington, DC.
52 minutes | 9 months ago
EP 32: DEMISEXUALITY DURING RECOVERY TIME
Trying to date with health issues is hard enough. (When do I bring it up, before the date? After three dates? Should I put it in my profile??) But what about the period of time when your health has stabilized and you're just dipping your toe back into the field? Aside from the challenge of coming back to app dating after a hiatus, it brings up a lot of anxiety and emotion about how to address "what you've been up to" and the desire to be honest but not scare people away. There have been so many singles sick with Covid-19 this year, so whether or not your health issue is ongoing, in the past, or Covid-related, dealing with the competing desires to stay home and get well and find an intimate partner can be tough to navigate. And while apps are great for increased accessibility while we're stuck at home recovering, what if all you really want to do is meet IRL? In this episode we talk to Lauren, a self-described demisexual, defined as someone whose attraction to a partner is qualified by an emotional connection first and foremost, and not necessarily a physical attraction. Our VOP Neal sheds some light on whether men, and specifically gay men, consider themselves demisexuals or is it just women? If you're feeling aligned with either of these two topics, please know you are certainly not alone. Also - if you're one of the .01% of the world population that (like Lauren and Neal) find Kevin Kline sexy in "Pirates of Penzance" at a young age - this episode's for you!!
51 minutes | 9 months ago
EP 31: HEADHUNTER FOR LOVE
Welcome to a new series of episodes we're offering with different matchmakers & dating coaches!! If you're feeling super tired of using endless apps in quarantine, maybe you're starting to get curious about what it'd be like to work with a matchmaker and just have someone else take the reigns for a bit. Or maybe you just want some tips & tricks about how to manage virtual dating right now. Either way, we've got you covered, and we can't wait to bring you a bunch of awesome new guests on this topic. For our first episode of this series, we welcome Ashley Campana, Certified Matchmaker & Director of Recruiting at Lisa Clampitt Matchmaking, a high-end, personalized dating service that gives men (and now women too!) a bridge into a social network that allows them to feel as if they have a best friend to introduce them to other singles of quality and style. (And I KNOW we all want that, right?) So what's exactly up with matchmaking during COVID-19? Isn't matchmaking old-fashioned? And what makes a successful match anyway? And what is UP with those notorious "databases" of women?? We talk all this and more, giving you the insider skinny on what it would be like to work with a matchmaker in 2020. If you're intrigued and want to work with Lisa Clampitt Matchmaking in NYC either as a paying client or as a gratis member of their database, head on over to www.lisaclampitt.com. Note that while the site is currently geared towards male clients, Ashley tells us this has recently begun to change, and their bespoke boutique services are now being provided to women as well. To work with/ learn more about Ashley, head here.
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