21 minutes | Apr 13, 2021

Looking At Sex in a New Way

Calling all husbands and wives - “Does Your Marriage Need a Different Sexual Lens?” 

Josh recently shared this question through a thoughtful article on the Regeneration Ministries website. And today, Josh and Kit are unpacking what it means so you can experience sex in a better way with your spouse. 

Our culture tends to put expectations sex - what it should look like, what you should look like, how you should feel, when it should happen, even how often it should happen. Sex is all about what you get out of it. 

In this conversation, we’re hoping to shift our gaze from what the world tells us about sex and ask our Creator what He means it to be instead.  

That’s where the shift comes in.  

The different lens we’re exploring transfers sex from self-serving opportunity to an opportunity to give of yourself. When you strip away the societal constructs to allow yourself to be naked in more than a physical way; you are then able to gift yourself to your spouse in a way that brings freedom and love and appreciation. The world entangles insecurity into sex. 

Allow the challenge in this episode to invite depth and vulnerability and delight for you and your spouse.


If Christians begin to practice thinking and talking about sex as a form of self-giving love, that’s what sex is designed to be.

This is my body given for you - given is the operative word

What does it lookIf Sex is an act of self-giving love, then tonight we didn’t reach climax but I’m going to love you where you are tonight. I’m going to love you in this space.


Lay down the comparison of friends’ marriages or sex lives.

Pray and practice against Coveting. The words “If Only” can be like flags warning that you are wanting what others have; be aware and take notice of what you have in your spouse and in your marriage.

Take notice and ask yourself: What is our marriage like? How are we uniquely ourselves in this marriage?

Practice delighting in your spouse (laying aside criticism and comparison); what about your spouse first attracted you? What attracts you now? Be aware of parts of him/her, things about their voice and personality. Then share it with him/her.


Full Transcription Available here

Original music by Shannon Smith. Audio engineering by Gabriel @ DelMar Sound Recording.

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