Created with Sketch.
Your Parenting Long Game
19 minutes | 14 hours ago
Episode 83: A Long Game Strategy for Kids With Strong Willed Behavior & Big Emotions
“Strong willed” behavior -- kids’ questioning, negotiating, defying -- can be incredibly frustrating to deal with. And it makes sense that when we see that behavior, we try to get children to change. But that strategy is often ineffective, making us feel helpless to address the situation effectively. In this episode, you’ll learn why strong-willed behavior is actually a coping mechanism for children who have big feelings. You’ll also learn how understanding that connection can help you motivate more positive behavior and foster your child’s long-term resilience.
17 minutes | 8 days ago
Episode 82: How to NOT Be So Exhausted by Others’ Emotions
One of the things that exhausts us most as parents is having to deal with others’ big emotions -- especially when we’re dealing with them so frequently. Of course we always want to try to teach our kids tools to deal with their own emotions...but in the meantime, it is possible to feel less exhausted no matter how others around you are acting or feeling. In this episode, you’ll learn simple steps you can take to protect yourself from being depleted by others’ emotions.
15 minutes | 15 days ago
Episode 81: Raising Children With Healthy Self-Esteem (But Not a Sense of Entitlement)
We all want our children to feel good about themselves, and often we try to instill a sense of confidence by praising or complimenting them. Unfortunately, praise and compliments often lead to a sense of entitlement rather than healthy self-esteem. In this episode, you’ll learn the two components of healthy self-esteem as well as simple actions you can take to start to incorporate these concepts into your life.
20 minutes | 22 days ago
Episode 80: Questions from Parents: Not Letting Kids “Get Away With” Disrespect + Child Only Wants More Attention When Others Are Around
While it can be valuable to learn parenting tips and tools, it can also be helpful to learn how to apply those tips and tools to real situations! In this episode, you’ll hear answers to parents’ questions about addressing disrespect (which often doesn’t go well in the moment) without letting kids “get away with it”; and why children may demand more attention -- and act as if you never give them any! -- when others are around.
17 minutes | a month ago
Episode 79: When Children Say Mean Things About Themselves
While it’s difficult to see children being mean to others, it’s just as hard to hear them being mean to themselves, saying things like “I’m stupid,” “I’m ugly,” or “I have no friends.” And often the way we respond to those statements doesn’t seem to make them feel better. In this episode, you’ll learn why our (logical) responses may do more harm than good… and what you can say and do instead to improve how your child views themselves.
16 minutes | a month ago
Episode 78: “When-Then” Statements: A Simple Long Game Tool for Reacting More Effectively
You may have such good intentions about staying calm when addressing your children’s behavior. But when you’ve asked them to do something over and over, or when they’re being aggressive or disrespectful, or when they’re melting down over the smallest thing, it is HARD to keep your cool. In this episode, you’ll learn a simple tool for handling these situations more effectively… and in a way that you don’t regret.
17 minutes | 2 months ago
Episode 77: What Works When Your Child Is Having a Big Emotion or Reaction
If you have a child who tends to have big emotions or reactions, you’ve probably tried many different things to reduce the drama in that moment. But you may not have found much success, so you’re dealing with the drama over and over (or you’re walking on eggshells to prevent that big reaction!). In this episode, you’ll learn exactly what to focus on as your child is having a big emotion so that the situation goes more smoothly -- and so that you feel less helpless and depleted. You’ll also 2 simple statements to use so that you can incorporate this strategy right away.
22 minutes | 2 months ago
Episode 76: Answering Parents' Questions about Negative Reactions to Positive Feedback + Screaming as Child's First Response
While it can be valuable to learn parenting tips and tools, it can also be helpful to learn how to apply those tips and tools to real situations! In this episode, you’ll hear answers to parents’ questions about what to do when a child gets upset when they receive positive feedback and how to address a child whose initial reaction is to scream -- even when they know they’re not supposed to.
16 minutes | 2 months ago
Episode 75: Micro Deposits: How to Improve Your Relationship Even When You Don’t Have Much Time (Or Your Child Is Resistant)
After a year of spending so much (sometimes negative) time with your children, you may feel that your relationship with them isn’t where you want it to be. But you may not know how to improve things except to “spend more positive time with them”...which you may not have the time or desire to do! And maybe you’ve even tried to improve your relationship, but your children are resistant. In this episode, you’ll learn how to make “micro deposits”-- actions that don’t take much time and that will improve the likelihood that your children will actually want more positive moments with you.
10 minutes | 2 months ago
Episode 74: Getting Time for Yourself
As we’ve been home with our children more for the last year, one of the most difficult parts is that we haven’t gotten time for ourselves. For many of us, this lack of alone time has led to less patience, less connection with our kids, and a lot more Yuck (in everyone). And even though we know we need more time to ourselves, we may not know how to find it. In this episode, I’ll offer 3 tips for getting that time that you need so that you can start to find your patience, give your children what they need, and shift the tone in your home.
19 minutes | 3 months ago
Episode 73: How to Address Negative Behavior AFTER It’s Happened
When a child is in the middle of a negative behavior, mood, or attitude, it’s hard to get them out of it. (Even if you’re able to, it takes a lot of energy.) The reality is, it is more efficient to teach children how to act differently when they’re NOT in that negative place. But who wants to talk about negative behavior after it’s happened? Often children will be resistant to these conversations… or the conversations don’t lead to change. In this episode, you’ll learn the 3 steps to a positive conversation -- one that is more connective and is much more likely to lead to positive change in future behavior.
27 minutes | 3 months ago
Episode 72: Guest Expert Ebone’ Granger: How to Raise Racially Conscious Children
You may want to talk to your children about topics like race and diversity and inclusion, but how do you bring up these topics? When should you start talking about them, and what should you say? In this episode, guest expert Ebone’ Granger will share her tips on what to say to your children to foster race consciousness (with tips for children of different ages) and what to do if you haven’t started these conversations yet. She’ll also offer tips about how to handle it when others engage in conversations with your children that conflict with what you’re teaching them.
15 minutes | 3 months ago
Episode 71: Treat Yourself Differently: Yuck Dumps for You
Many of us learned as children that if things were difficult, we should just suck it up and push through it. In reality, when we just suck it up and push through it, Yuck builds up inside of us and negatively affects how we treat others and how we deal with situations. In this episode, you’ll learn how YOUR Yuck dumps can lead to better behavior, moods and attitudes in you and your children. You’ll also learn a simple question to ask yourself to start your Yuck dump and how to make sure your Yuck dump doesn’t turn into wallowing.
16 minutes | 3 months ago
Episode 70: Questions from Parents: How to Pause Before Reacting; Tools for Siblings; Handling Defiance
While it can be valuable to learn parenting tips and tools, it can also be helpful to learn how to apply those tips and tools to real situations. In this episode, you’ll hear answers to parents’ specific questions about what we can do as parents to help us pause before reacting, which tools siblings need to get along (and how to teach those tools without condoning negative behavior), and what to do when a child is being defiant.
20 minutes | 4 months ago
Episode 69: A Long Game Strategy for Addressing Children’s Lying
Most children lie at some point, whether it’s over something small or something big. Of course any parent is likely to feel angry and concerned when a child lies. Unfortunately, when our responses come from a place of anger and concern, we usually respond in a way that doesn’t address the issue effectively. In this episode, you’ll learn 3 reasons children lie (it’s not just to avoid punishment), why our usual attempts to address lying tend to backfire… and how we can use a different strategy to reduce this behavior now and in the future.
16 minutes | 4 months ago
Episode 68: Treat Yourself Differently: Use “Neutral Thinking” to Save Energy
We’re depleted, and often we don’t know how to break out of the cycle of exhaustion we’re caught in. One of the simplest ways out of this cycle, however, takes one of the simplest actions: Choose different thoughts. In this episode, you’ll learn about the concept of “neutral thinking” -- a strategy that may help even if you’ve struggled with affirmations or thinking positively. You’ll also learn how this strategy can save you energy and help you parent from a place of your values rather than a place of your Yuck.
22 minutes | 4 months ago
Episode 67: 3 Questions To Ask Yourself To Set Effective Rules and Boundaries
You know it’s important to set rules and boundaries if you want to raise responsible, resilient children. But how do you set rules and boundaries that children will actually follow? In this episode, you’ll learn the components of “effective” expectations. You’ll also learn 3 questions to ask yourself going forward if you want to set realistic boundaries for your children that lead to success rather than power struggles.
23 minutes | 4 months ago
Episode 66: The 4-R Method: Action Steps for Long-Term Improvement in Behavior, Moods, and Attitudes
You may want to stop using parenting strategies that don’t work and make you feel bad (what I call “band aid parenting” strategies). You may promise yourself that you’ll start using more respectful, effective, long-lasting strategies (what I call “long game parenting” strategies). But wanting to change and actually implementing new tools are often two different things. In this episode, I’ll teach you a process of small action steps you can take in order to shift from old habits to new ones. You’ll also learn how this method will allow you to break free of the cycles of negativity that currently seem impossible to change.
19 minutes | 4 months ago
Episode 65: Want Long-Lasting Positive Change In Your Family? Here’s What You Need (& How I’ll Help)
It’s that time of the year when we’re all thinking about improvement. When it comes to your family, you likely want to see more respectful, resilient behavior and more connected relationships. But your attempts to make things better may not be leading to long-term results. In this episode, I’ll review the two things that must happen if you want to see long-lasting positive change… and how I’ll be supporting you in realistically incorporating these two changes into your life going forward.
19 minutes | 5 months ago
Episode 64: Let Go Of… Putting Your Needs Behind Everyone Else’s
For many of us, our days consist of doing things for other people, and IF there happens to be time left over (there usually isn’t), we might think about what we need. Unfortunately, putting our needs behind everyone else’s doesn’t just affect us; it affects our children. In this episode, you’ll learn why attending to your needs is necessary if you want to see improvement in children’s behavior. You’ll also learn how to identify where to start making SMALL changes… and how to increase the likelihood that you’ll actually take action.
Terms of Service
Do Not Sell My Personal Information
© Stitcher 2021