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In this show we discuss the push and pull between the budding independence of young adults in college and the task parents have of “letting go,” among other related topics, including: Self starting and procrastination tips for studentsComing back home:  sleep pattern differences and messy roomsDr. Shane Owens answers direct questions from some students about their current worriesGuest Dr. Shane Owens, PhD had a wonderful "dad voice" that I believe will comfort anyone interested in this topic.  Dr. Owens is a board-certified behavioral and cognitive psychologist dedicated to helping college students, young adults, and parents.  He has been serving campus mental health services at Farmingdale State College for many years and holds a private practice in Commack, New York.   Dr. Owens is frequently a contributor/speaker at professional conferences and is an editorial board member of Evidence-Based Practice in Child and Adolescent Mental Health.This show is dedicated to internationalforgiveness.com where you can learn all about research that supports the mental and physical health benefits of forgiveness, practical steps on how to forgive and more.  I create this show out of love and a wish to freely share access to psychology.   To support the production costs of this show, please visit buymeacoffee.com/dralexandra.  If you choose to buy me a coffee for $3 you have the option to leave me a message with a comment, a show idea or just to say something nice!  Support the show (https://www.buymeacoffee.com/dralexandra)

Are you narrowing your life by “managing” your worries and obsessions for a good portion of your day?   Listen to this episode while folding your laundry or doing your dishes and learn about:  What it’s like for people who experience “sticky” thoughts that don’t go awayHow feelings are like waves in the ocean . . . they come and go.  We can’t always control our feelings, but we can control how we respond to them.How to use Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) to live your deepest values while getting relief from “sticky thoughts” and compulsions from OCD and moreToday’s guest is psychologist Dr. Patricia Zurita Ona, known as “Dr. Z,” author of six books including Escaping the Emotional Roller Coaster, ACT for the Emotionally Sensitive and The ACT Workbook for Teens with OCD: Unhook Yourself and Live Life to the Full.  Dr. Z has led over 140 workshops at national and international conferences and runs a private practice in San Francisco where she works with children through adults  that struggle with anxiety, perfectionism, procrastination, and with managing their emotions.  Dr. Z is also the host of Playing it Safe Podcast -  learn more about her at www.thisisdoctorz.com.Click here or find Psychology America with Dr. Alexandra wherever you listen to podcasts.    I create these podcasts out of love and service - if you leave a rating on iTunes it helps to share the episodes with more people.    You can also help me with production costs by buying me a coffee and leaving me a personal comment, question or topic request!  Visit buymeacoffee.com/dralexandra  Support the show (https://www.buymeacoffee.com/dralexandra)

Get out your pen, there are so many helpful and practical morsels of wisdom offered in this episode!  Expert guest Brittany Wool shares with listeners Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) concepts such as “wise mind,” “opposite action” and how to “pause” with mindfulness.     Hear stories about a married couple getting angry over dishes, a middle schooler learning to tame their reactions to “mean girls” and what to do when feeling absolutely exasperated.  Support the show (https://www.buymeacoffee.com/dralexandra)

How can we stop uncontrollable and unintentional weight gain?  What can we do about it, what works and how do we stick to it?   Should those with serious weight problems consider bariatric surgery and medication?I recently learned so much about obesity from incredibly informed health psychologist Dr. Dina Goldstein Silverman.  After watching her excellent presentation at the 2020 NJPA Conference I asked her if she would be a guest on podcast.  We are joined in this conversation by attorney and my husband, Neill W. Clark.Expert guest Dr. Dina Goldstein Silverman is the recipient of the Frank and Mary Ann Dattilio Education Award from the Pennsylvania Psychological Association. She was recently recognized by South Jersey Magazine for the Reader's Choice Award in 2019 and 2017.  She is an Assistant Professor of Psychiatry and Psychology at Cooper University Hospital where she teaches evidence-based psychotherapy and provides individual supervision to psychiatry residents, medical students, and post-doctoral and pre-doctoral clinical health psychology residents.  Enjoy! 

How do exceptional leaders bring in and use their emotions to effectively lead and persuade?  Enjoy stories and new learning about these topics and more, including:  *  The EQ characteristics of outstanding leaders*  Authenticity versus strategically bringing in emotion*  Emotional contagion*  Daydreaming in the workplaceMy guests on this episode are Cary Cherniss and Cornelia Roche, authors of Leading with Feeling, Nine Strategies of Emotionally Intelligence Leadership (2020), a book based on their in depth study of 25 outstanding leaders. Cary Cherniss, PhD was my dissertation chair at Rutgers, where he serves as Professor of Applied Psychology Emeritus.  Cary spent much of his professional life studying Emotional Intelligence and he has published seven books, including Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace, and over 70 scholarly articles, many on this same topic.   Dr. Cherniss is the Director of the Emotional Intelligence Consortium for Research on Emotional Intelligence in Organizations.     Cornelia Roche, PsyD was a classmate of mine when I was in graduate school.  She is an organizational psychologist and management coach serving various types of organizations, including corporate settings, schools, small businesses and non profits. Cornelia has served the Emotional Intelligence Consortium for Research on Emotional Intelligence in Organizations since its inception.  We are also joined in this episode by attorney (and my husband) Neill W. Clark, who always enhances the conversation with his wisdom and curiosity. 

It surprised me to learn that we have over two million people in prison in the United States.  The majority of individuals in prison will eventually be released into the community. . . and who will they become after the prison experience?  This episode presents the results of research just completed on a novel therapy for rehabilitating men in a maximum security prisons.    Learn the elements of an approach which seeks to address the root of the problem, and in the process learn techniques for healing and breaking free of anger and resentment.Guest Dr. Maria Gambaro is a licensed psychologist who has dedicated the last twelve years of her life to forgiveness counseling, research and assessment. She is one of the principle authors of the research and paper we will cover today. Guest Dr. Robert Enright is the founder of the International Forgiveness Institute and has been featured in Time Magazine and ABC’s 20/20 as the pioneer of the scientific study of forgiveness.  Dr. Enright is a professor of psychology at the University of Wisconsin, Madison and is the author of the Eight Keys to Forgiveness.    This is the second time I have had Dr. Enright on the show - find him in a previous very popular episode entitled “How to Forgive.” 

Historical figures like George Washington and Lucius Quinctius Cincinnatus can teach us about humility and virtue in politics and life.   Host Randolph "Wolf" Shipon and I discussed these topics and more on the American Unity Radio podcast, in which Dr. Shipon seeks to bring a divided America closer together.  He talks about putting red, white and blue together to form “purple people.”  Enjoy!

Google Scholar data ranked Steven C. Hayes among the top 1,500 most cited scholars on the planet, in all areas of study, living and dead.  He is the founder of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) which brings in mindfulness, acceptance and value based methods to relieve human suffering.  I enjoyed and recommend his most recent book “A Liberated Mind: How to Pivot Toward What Matters.”   Learn more about him at stevenchayes.com.  May you enjoy the wisdom of Steven C. Hayes as much as I did!  

In this episode Dr. Kendahl Shortway shares the results of her recent study entitled:  “New Jersey Coaches and Athletic Directors Perspectives:  Gender Nonbinary Athletes.”     Dr. Shortway, Neill Clark and I also discuss:   Important definitions, including the meaning of “nonbinary,” transgender, genderfluid, cisgender LGBTQA+ and more for listeners who are unfamiliarConcepts and questions about the psychology and biology of genderWhat the NCAA and Olympic Committee rules state as it relates to participation by transgender athletes.  Dr. Kendahl Shortway, PsyD is the co-author of the Routledge Handbook of Clinical Sport Psychology (in publication 2020) and much of her research has focused on sports psychology.    She teaches and serves as research coordinator at Kean University.Neill Clark, formerly a NCAA Division 1 Track and Field athlete and currently a master’s competitive athlete in running and swimming, offers his perspective as an athlete and an attorney.  Yesterday (6-15-20) the United States Supreme Court ruled that the Civil Rights Act of 1964, Title VII, protects transgender & homosexual people from workplace discrimination.  Listen to this podcast for a primer on LBGTQA+ terms, definitions and concepts and learn about the controversial topic of transgender athletes competing in sports.     

In this recorded talk Dr. Alexandra shares wisdom from Rumi, Petrarch, Nelson Mandela, positive psychology and more.    A special thank you to Mr. Gary Kitchell for his photo of the sunrise.  

This episode is about identifying our values and living according to them, including strategies to help us from getting distracted and derailed.   In this episode Tom Russo, author of There are no Politics in Heaven, shares some of the life lessons he has learned including overcoming his earlier years of being bullied, escaping into the unsavory aspects of political power, finding and living according to his deepest values and transforming into a servant-leader.    Dr. Alexandra teaches listeners about Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) along the way.   Thomas Russo, a former elected official in two NJ municipalities, currently serves as town manager of Newton NJ in addition to teaching at Seton Hall University and Pillar College.  

Dr. Alexandra, Dr. Michelle Pievsky and Neill Clark share seven practical tips on how to cope with stressful and unexpected circumstances.For further podcasts that may be particularly helpful for coping during COVID 19, search Psychology America with Dr. Alexandra for. . . .Caring for our Immune System:#31. Mind Your Microbiota#16.  Your Best SleepGeneral Coping:  #4.  Facing Our Fears#25. Resilience, Overcoming and Fortitude#20.  For Couples:  The Second Shift#5.  When Our Thoughts Get in the Way (and How to Get Relief)#19. Facing the Unknown Part 1#29. GriefThank you to my 5th grade son George for the cover artwork.  Find his artwork and photography on toads and more at his artwork (@grego.andrew).  

I so enjoyed this conversation on the “Love and Psychology of Dogs” and am excited to share it with you!  The guests on this podcast episode are Dr. Nancy Shay, veterinarian and Jeannette Carpenter, dog walker.   Join us as we discuss the following and more:our thoughts on recent research on the “intelligence,” including emotional intelligence, of dogs dogs’ emotions and sense of moralityamazing research on the effects dog ownership has on the health of children and adults Dr. Nancy has worked at the Highlands Veterinary Hospital in Sparta, New Jersey for 22 years.  She has a special interest in physical rehabilitation and animal behavior.  She earned her veterinary degree from University College Dublin Veterinary School of Ireland and is currently working toward her certification in canine rehabilitation.Jeannette Carpenter has owned her own dog walker/pet sitter business for 10 years.   I have aways enjoyed and appreciated her funny and moving stories about her “clients.”  In this recorded conversation I especially enjoyed learning about her two styles of walks she gives her dogs.     Enjoy!   

I am grateful to have experienced joy and even bliss when my children were infants and toddlers, but this is not always the case.  In fact, on this show I learned that 80% of mothers experience postpartum blues.    In this episode you’ll also learn: Advice on screen time for infants and toddlersInfants, toddlers and sleepThe best way for little ones to learn languageHow to discipline a toddlerWhat both she and I might do differently in raising our infants and toddlersDr. Michelle Arkow Pievsky, PhD is an expert on the psychology of infants and toddlers and serves as a fellow at both Youth Consultation Service Institute for Infant and Preschool Mental Health in East Orange, NJ and at Mindful Assessment and Psychological Services in Pequannock, NJ.  Her many publications include a meta analysis on the neurocognitive profile of ADHD.  Last year Dr. Pievsky presented on many topics, including  “Autism Spectrum Disorder in Primary Care” and “A Behavioral Health Toolbox for Pediatricians.”  Enjoy!  Support the show (https://www.buymeacoffee.com/dralexandra)

This episode inspired me to change the way I eat and I’m excited to share this topic with others.   Guest Jeanne Petrucci and I discuss the connection between our mood, our health and the gut, including: *  Promising research on how our gut impacts our mood and vice versa*  What it means for the gut to be “leaky” and its relation to inflammation and the immune system*  The gut and the increase in food sensitivities *  What to feed the gut for your health and cancer prevention*  The role of fecal transplants*  What pregnant women and parents of young children need to know about the gutJeanne Petrucci is a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist and the founder of Living Plate (livingplate.org), an organization which seeks out the latest scientific research on nutrition and then shares that information through educational and culinary programs.  Enjoy!  

With compassion and elegance the guest on today’s episode, Dr. Nancy McWilliams, helps listeners understand the following and more:  What is healthy versus pathological narcissism? Can certain parenting create narcissistic personalities?What are some practical suggestions for those in a romantic relationship with a partner with narcissistic tendencies?What does it feel like if you have narcissistic personality disorder and what can help?What is overt, covert and psychopathic narcissism?What if you work for someone with narcissistic tendencies? How can companies spot narcissistic tendencies when hiring leaders?Dr. Nancy McWilliams (nancymcw@aol.com) teaches at Rutgers University’s Graduate School of Applied & Professional Psychology and practices in Lambertville, New Jersey. She is author of Psychoanalytic Diagnosis (1994, rev. ed. 2011), Psychoanalytic Case Formulation (1999), and Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy (2004) and is associate editor of the Psychodynamic Diagnostic Manual, 2nd ed. (2017). A former president of Division 39 (Psychoanalysis) of the American Psychological Association, she has been featured in three APA videos of master clinicians, the most recent being “Three Approaches to Psychotherapy.” Her books are available in 20 languages; she lectures widely both nationally and internationally.Enjoy!  

Guest Dr. Deb Bernstein (drdebbernstein.com) endured the loss of her young brother, her young romantic love and most recently both her mother and father.  As a clinical psychologist she has specialized in grief through research and through her 35 year private practice in Warwick, NY.  In this episode Dr. Deb and I discuss the following and more:   The many and varied symptoms of acute grief and how long it lasts How our relationship with the deceased affects our grief, such as when we have mixed feelings about them How Elizabeth Kubler-Ross apologized about how her “Stages of Grief” were misconstrued How to respond to a grieving friend Strategies for copingSome books and authors we brought up in our conversation include:  When the Bough Breaks:  Forever After the Death of a Son or Daughter  by Judith R. Bernstein, Ph.D.Grief Counseling and Grief Therapy, Fifth Edition:  A Handbook for the Mental Health Practitioner  by J. William Worden PhDThe Other Side of Sadness: What the New Science of Bereavement Tells Us About Life After Loss by George A. Bonanno Ph.D.

Did you know that most people with dementia don’t notice that they’ve had memory loss or personality changes?  It tends to be relatives and close friends that notice it and then encourage the individual to seek an evaluation. I learned from the guest on this episode that the “self awareness” part of the brain is likely to be one of the areas harmed by dementia!     In this episode, also learn: How do Dementia symptoms differ from normal aging?  How can one tell the difference between Dementia and depression?  What does research recommend on how to prevent dementia?What steps should you or family take once a Dementia diagnosis has been made?What is the latest technology on identifying Alzheimer’s Disease?What is it like for those caring for the Dementia patient?  The guest on today’s episode is Dr. Michelle Papka (www.thecrcnj.com, 973-850-4622), who has nearly 25 years' combined experience as a researcher and clinician specializing in the field of aging, Alzheimer’s disease, and dementia. She practices as a neuropsychologist, psychotherapist, and researcher, and has served as the Principal Investigator on over 20 recent clinical trials for Alzheimer’s disease, memory impairment, or mild cognitive impairment.She’s had numerous publications of her work and is an active public speaker, invited editor, grant reviewer, consultant, and committee member of multiple specialized organizations and publications in the field of aging and Alzheimer’s Disease. 

Your heart is racing,  your hands are tingling, you can’t breathe and you wonder:  “Is this a heart attack?  Why does it feel like the world is crashing down on me?”In this episode learn: * What a panic attack is and is not* Evidence-based strategies for overcoming panic* The role of medication when treating panic disorder *  The treatment approach for Tourette’s syndrome, a disorder related to motor and vocal tics, another expertise held by the episode guest.   Expert guest for this episode is Dr. Rob Zambrano, a psychologist at Stress and Anxiety Services of New Jersey (stressandanxiety.com).  Dr. Zambrano, who specializes in panic, Tourette’s syndrome and the anxiety spectrum disorders, will surprise listeners with what may seem like a paradoxical strategy to overcoming a panic attack.  This episode is dedicated to Ginnie’s House, a non-profit organization which provides 100% free therapy to abused children and their caregivers.  Learn more at ginnieshouse.org. Thank you _geogre.art_ , my son, for the photograph.

Two days after my first baby Rebecca was born, as I held her, nursed her and loved her so much, I also mourned. . . knowing that one day I would need to let her go.    Now she’s seventeen, lovely, and about to enter her senior year of high school.  At the end of next summer she’ll be living at college.  It’ll soon be the start of her launch, and her freedom.  When she comes back, she’ll have already tasted independence like never before. . . In this episode on “Launching Children and Letting Go” learn about:  What it’s like for parents after children are launchedHealthy and unhealthy attachmentWhat it means when the adolescent or teenager “pulls away” How to prevent secrets and lying with adolescents and teenagersHow to “let go” of childrenHow to assist children with moving toward independenceInspirational examplesSong by Tom Askin of PonderRosa Studios, butterfly illustration by Briana Giasullo