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(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Have you ever gone to the emergency room? Have you ever thought of how emergency doctors face stress? Have you ever considered how an emergency doctor manages anxiety as part of their work life? Today, I’m sharing with you the interview with Dr. Mark Hoffman, M.D., a board certified emergency physician, with over 30 years of practice. It was a treat to hear from Dr. Hoffman on how he: Manages stress when taking care of multiple patients at once Makes decisions when working with patients with acute conditions Deals with interpersonal stress Performs a “mental triage” Juggles all tasks-medical and administrative-during his work shifts Are the best E.R. doctors the best jugglers? What can we learn from them? What can you learn from them? (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Can’t make up your mind about marrying your girlfriend or not? Can’t make up your mind about the TV you need to buy? Can’t make up your mind about staying or quitting your job? If the prospect of making a decision makes you feel overwhelmed and paralyzed, then you need to listen to this episode! In this episode, Dr. Sally Winston, Psy.D. and I discuss the processes behind making a decision and what keeps you stuck when having to make a choice. Quite often, when facing these dilemmas, we play-it-safe by overthinking, dwelling, or ruminating, and end up putting ourselves into analysis-paralysis: thinking a lot about a choice without taking action. If you’re in the habit of not making a choice, you may be dealing with chronic indecisiveness, which is more than ordinary indecisions.  Key Takeaways The processes behind chronic indecision How to nurture experiential knowledge Wise mind The limitations of pros and cons How to nurture a wise mind (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ How often do you assume the worst-case-scenario when facing a difficult situation? When was the last time someone invited you to a party, and you started worrying about it months in advance? Do you stress about situations that have not happened yet? Anybody can learn how our minds work and how to work with them. When we are dealing with worries, anxieties, fears, we all play-it-safe. You might be playing it safe. If you get stuck thinking of doom and gloomy scenarios, you may find yourself asking others what to do in order for you to not make any more mistakes. In this episode, I interview Dr. Sally Winston, Psy.D., an anxiety expert. She and I discuss different skills to manage those thoughts - the future-oriented ones - and those moments in which you get stuck in imagination.  As you listen to this episode, you will learn actionable skills to stop worrying about what might happen and live fully in the moment.  Key Takeaways What is anticipatory anxiety How to handle those moments when your imagination hijacks you Three different levels of fear The difference between rumination and planning How to shift from “what if” to “what is” Dr. Winston’s metaphor of how to handle uncertainty The opposite of uncertainty … is not what you think it is … Metacognitions Productive thinking versus unproductive thinking (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ This is part 2 of my interview with Todd Kashdan, Ph.D. Key Takeaways How to persuade others skillfully How intolerance and speed of uncertainty feed into rigid thinking The connection between persuasion skills and acceptance and commitment skills The difference between task-oriented problem solving and relationship problems What is cognitive diversity and how it plays in our group interactions How to use cognitive defusion when dealing with interpersonal difficulties Why viewpoint diversity is good How to spark curiosity, not fear How to build stronger alliances during conflict (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Have you ever played-it-safe by keeping your opinions to yourself? When was the last time you felt afraid of social rejection that you did not say what you really thought about a topic in fear of rocking the boat? How often do you play-it-safe by placating and going along with others' opinions so you are liked by others? Group thinking, agreeing quickly with others, avoiding sharing our opinions, or making sure we don’t rock the boat are the many ways in which we play-it-safe when dealing with fears of rejection, not being liked, or not belonging in a group. But how do those playing-it-safe moves work in our relationships with others and our relationship with ourselves? When is it effective to minimize interpersonal conflict, and when is it not? How and when do we examine our beliefs about how things should be? How do we avoid cognitive rigidity? In this conversation with Dr. Todd Kashdan, Ph.D., he shares his research on persuasion, healthy dissentment, group thinking, and skills to handle conflict that go beyond assertiveness training.  Key Takeaways: How group thinking leads us to “underseen” or “overseen” social situations or any other matters What is healthy resentment Skills to handle cognitive rigidity The basics of the science of persuasion How intolerance of uncertainty plays a role in our thinking Why people in disadvantage still support leaders that don’t favor them The case of Evo Morales, the former president of Bolivia, and how group thinking created a different image of his government (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Have you ever been caught in a spiral of self-criticism? When was the last time your inner critic took over your day?  We all have stories we’ve created about ourselves - some of them positive and some of them negative. If you suffer from low self-esteem, your story may include these types of narratives: “I’m a failure,” “I’ll never be able to do that,” or “if only I were smarter or more attractive, I could be happy.”  Dealing effectively with your inner critic doesn't happen overnight, but if you learn compassionate, evidence-based and actionable skills to handle all those stories, to relate to them skillfully, you can learn to accept yourself as you are and not as who you wish to be. Key Takeaways In this conversation, Dr. Joe Oliver, Ph.D. and I discussed: What is self-esteem How to handle self-criticism Defusion: thanking your mind How to notice when you’re entangled with your mind How to notice and catch your playing-it-safe moves The story behind his book Dealing with the monsters of the negative stories with dignity and respect Episode notes: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/how-to-boost-your-self-esteem/ (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Resilience is usually understood as the process and the outcome of successfully adapting to difficult or challenging life experiences (American Psychological Association (APA)). In the information era, being exposed to all types of stressors is the norm and not the exception. We may struggle to learn how to deal with a world that moves fast, pressures us in many different directions, and a world in which hundreds of things are outside of our control. In this podcast episode, I discuss with Dennis Relojo-Howell the ways in which he became resilient and the different ways to nourish resilient practices. Dennis is a social entrepreneur, speaker, and resilience researcher, originally born in the Philippines. In 2014, he founded Psychreg, an award-winning media project dedicated to keeping everyone informed about psychology, mental health, and wellness. In this conversation, Dennis shared: - How he overcame growing up in a stressful environment - How he learned to pursue what matters in the midst of social stressors - How he uses creative writing as a resilient practice (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ 60% of people dealing with depression are likely to be dealing with anxiety. If you're anxious, you are also likely to be depressed. In the case of fear-based struggles, it is much more common to struggle with different types of fears than a single one. So if you’re dealing with attacks, it’s also possible that you're dealing with chronic worry, or if you’re dealing with chronic worry, it’s also possible that you’re struggling with fears of public speaking.  Traditional CBT focuses on treating a disorder such as social anxiety or depression. The problem with focusing on a single disorder is that the root cause of those struggles is not addressed. A core characteristic of ACT is to focus on teaching you psychological skills to increase your well-being, mental health, and the quality of your life. Instead of focusing on a diagnosis, ACT tackles the drivers of that particular diagnosis; therefore, ACT by nature is what is called a process-based model.   In this conversation Joseph Ciarrochi, Ph.D. and I discuss: The different psychological processes that are part of any struggle we deal with. The relationship between psychological processes and evolution. The importance of variation, selection, retention and context as drivers of changes The challenges of letting go of “all those stories about who we are.” The importance of paying attention to our physiological responses when getting stuck (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Self-criticism is a classic playing-it-safe move. We criticize ourselves as a way to think that we're going to be able to control the situation, control ourselves, and control circumstances in order to feel safe. How does it really work for you when you spend hours and hours criticizing yourself? How does it really work when you try to motivate yourself by being harder and harder with yourself?  But what if instead of spending hours and hours of criticizing, negatively judging, and putting yourself down, you learn skills to treat yourself with kindness, gentleness, and care as you would treat others? In this episode, I interview Dr. Dennis Tirch, Ph.D. Dr. Dennis Tirch founded the Center for Compassion-Focused Therapy in the USA. He has been described as one of the country's foremost experts on CFT and the psychology of compassion. Dr. Tirch is the author of 6 books and numerous chapters and peer-reviewed articles on mindfulness, acceptance, and compassion in psychotherapy. With Dr. Laura Silberstein-Tirch and others, Dr. Tirch is currently developing a research protocol involving behavioral science and CFT for treating anxiety, worry, and fear-based difficulties through compassionate courage cultivation. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Are you an overachiever? Some perfectionistic traits - e.g., being hardworking or paying attention to details - can be extremely handy. But what happens when you don’t do things in moderation and feel compelled to do more and more, do everything right, and avoid mistakes? In this episode, I chat with Clarissa Ong, Ph.D., about her work on perfectionism. We discussed in detail: The coherence trap Meta-awareness: awareness about awareness Exposure exercises as awareness exercises Motivational flexibility  Uncertainty workouts Self-compassion practices (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

To be human is to experience worry, fear, anxiety, and stress. To be human is to play-it-safe. But how do you handle those internal reactions when encountering life-threatening situations? What if being exposed to those unusual situations is part of your day-to-day life? Today, I share a special interview with Lance Morrison, former Captain Police Officer. You will hear different micro-skills Lance uses to handle life-threatening situations such as: Focusing on one thing at a time. Compassion-based responses Focusing on what matters Exercising (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ This is a super special interview with one of my favorite colleagues and author, Jonathan Kaplan, author of “Urban Mindfulness.” In this conversation we discussed: One of Jonathan’s favorite mindfulness exercises: sending warm wishes to people around you Why playing-it-safe behaviors are natural What is a playing-it-safe move Two skills to distinguish effective playing-it-safe moves from ineffective ones How to handle uncertainty How to handle ruling-thoughts about thinking (metacognitions) In the middle of the conversation, you will hear me practicing “how to say” one of my favorite words in English, and one of Jonathan’s favorite jokes related to anxiety and playing-it-safe. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Have you ever felt anxious when driving? Have you ever had a panic attack? Have you ever felt an unexpected tingling sensation in your arm? Do you know how it feels when running a marathon? Have you ever pushed your body beyond your limits? In all those scenarios, it’s quite likely you're going to experience some form of bodily-based sensation, and naturally, your brain is going to “make sense of it” by either perceiving it as a threat or as an insignificant sensation. If your brain perceives those sensations as a threat, it will naturally push you to play-it-safe. In this conversation with Dr. Diana Hill, you will learn specific skills to handle those uncomfortable bodily sensations, slow down, and fundamentally choose your response. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ In today’s episode of the Playing-It-Safe podcast, Dr. Z. and Lou Lasprugrato, MFT, discuss the various Acceptance and Commitment Skills (ACT) and how they apply to our day-to-day life. ACT skills are applicable not just for therapy or coaching but as a way of living life. At the end of the day, real change happens by taking action, one action after another.   What we discussed with Lou Lasprugato: How playing-it-safe moves are part of our day-to-day life What is perspective-taking or self-as-context within the ACT model 4 ways to think about self-as-context How to make values-based choices on-the-go How the 6 ACT processes are intertwined   What's aversive and what's appetitive when looking at your actions About Lou Lasprugato Lou Lasprugato is a psychotherapist in California and Virginia, a Peer-Reviewed Trainer in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), and a teacher of mindfulness meditation. Lou has facilitated workshops internationally on ACT. He earned his Master of Arts in Counseling Psychology, with a specialization in Holistic Studies from Lesley University, Cambridge, MA, following a career as a professional musician. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Michael P. Twohig, Ph.D. is the co-director of the ACT Research Group, a licensed psychologist in the state of Utah, and a Professor of Psychology at Utah State University. In this episode, I chat with Michael about his research on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) on perfectionism, we discuss in particular, one of the papers published in his lab: A randomized controlled trial of acceptance and commitment therapy for clinical perfectionism (2019). We chatted about the neurological screenings participants completed, the challenging moments of participants being attached to rules about how things are supposed to be, and how distinguishing helpful versus unhelpful perfectionistic actions is introduced in the study. You will also hear Michael sharing one of his favorite metaphors to facilitate behavioral flexibility. Subscribe to the Playing-it-safe newsletter Playing-it-safe newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Social media Instagram: Dr. Z.   https://www.instagram.com/dr.z.passionatebehaviorist/   Twitter: https://twitter.com/DrZ_behaviorist Dr. Z’s website: www.thisisdoctorz.com Dr. Z’s therapy/coaching website: www.eastbaybehaviortherapycenter.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Self-criticism is a classic playing-it-safe move. What are the harsh criticisms that your mind come up with? How do you handle them? Do you try to replace them with positive thoughts? Do you do more with your life? Do you try to prove yourself that you are an okay person? I ask all these questions to Dr. Christopher Willard, an expert on mindfulness and self-compassion. In my conversation with Chris you will hear about: The purpose or the function of self-criticism. Why do we do it? The difference between self-compassion and self-esteem How to handle thoughts like “harsh criticism motivates me or I don’t deserve to be kind to myself” The difference between gratitude practices and toxic positivity How to practice gratitude What the default mode network is Chris’s upcoming book on resilience How to develop a perspective-taking. Chris is a psychologist and an educational consultant, specializing in mindfulness. He serves on the board of directors at the Institute for Meditation and Psychotherapy, and is the president of the Mindfulness in Education Network. He is the author of Child’s Mind (2010), Growing Up Mindful (2016), Raising Resilience (2017), and eight other books for parents, professionals, and children. He also teaches at Harvard Medical School. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dealing effectively with anxiety and the discomfort that comes with it is a fundamental skill. It allows you to do what you care about and excel in life, especially when facing unfamiliar situations or unpleasant moments. In this episode, I interviewed Dr. Joel Minden. ​​He is the director of the Chico Center for Cognitive Behavior Therapy, Diplomate of the Academy of Cognitive and Behavioral Therapies (A-CBT), and the author of the anxiety management self-help book, “Show Your Anxiety Who’s Boss.”  In this interview, Joel and I discussed: - Three particular skills to manage anxiety (based on the book “Show Your Anxiety Who’s Boss”) - How to practice acceptance when dealing with anxious thoughts - How to deal with uncertainty - How to practice exposure exercises - Misconceptions about behaviorism And you will also listen to an acronym that Joel uses in his work and how I get playful when he shares it. Stay tuned!!! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you deeply care about what you do that you don't measure what it takes you to accomplish a goal? Are you a very conscientious person that struggles to do things that are not-good-enough? Are you super-committed to the projects you participate in that you forget to eat, sleep, or hang out with your friends at times? Are you often preoccupied with thoughts about "I must do well, otherwise I'm bad?" Are grit and discipline hurting you? Perfectionistic actions can keep you in a "perfect trap," but it doesn't have to be all bad. You can learn acceptance and commitment skills to release the shackles of perfectionistic actions without losing yourself and its benefits. There are three important questions for you to answer to figure out whether your perfectionistic actions are working for you or against you. In this episode, you will listen to an episode from the Audiobook The Upside of Perfectionism: An Acceptance and Commitment Skills ACT Focused Coaching If you have specific questions about perfectionistic actions, have been dealing with them for a long time, and want to take things a step further, you can get 1:1 coaching to unpack those specific sticky moments. In the coaching session, I’ll provide you with: A roadmap to get unstuck from any form of striving, high-achieving, and perfectionistic behaviors you’re dealing with. Compassionate and research-based skills to handle moments of stuckness. ACT skills to enjoy the golden nuggets of striving, perfectionistic, and high-achieving behaviors without hundreds of hours of self-criticism, worrying, and sleepless nights. Actionable skills to do what you care about – according to your standards – without hurting your relationships or the relationship with yourself. Get the ACT AUDIO-GUIDE & COACHING here: https://bit.ly/3QlagBk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When you transition from highschool to college – as it’s called in the United States – or to a University – as it’s called in other parts of the world, such as South America or Europe – you go through a significant life adjustment. As exciting as it is, there are also a lot of changes happening at once: you need to introduce yourself to new people, get adjusted to living at a different location, be in charge of your own meals, attend classes very early in the morning, speak with the register’s office if something is off, trying to fit in with your new peers, and even finding new hobbies. On top of that, you have to manage fears of failing, dealing with test anxiety, saying the wrong thing or acting in the wrong way to the point that you may engage in playing-it-safe actions like procrastinating, skipping classes, avoiding submitting a paper if it’s not perfect, and many more. In this episode, I chat with Nic Hooper, a clinical psychologist and a senior lecturer on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy at Cardiff University in England.  In 2017 Nic Hooper, began to write a book of life advice to his son, Max, which was to be given to him on his eighteenth birthday. Over time, that book slowly transformed into The Unbreakable Student. This is an authentic conversation that places values at the forefront. You will listen in particular about: Six ways to wellbeing How to commit to your values How to practice defusion How Nic learned to relate to his fears of being a failure How living our values has transformed Nic’s and my life. Nic’s website: nichooper.co.uk Follow Nic’s on twitter @nichooper7! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

(*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Today I have the pleasure to share an interview with Natasha Daniels, MFT, a mental health clinician, author, podcaster and founder of the community AT Parenting. In our conversation, Natasha and I talked about different playing-it-safe moves when dealing with the fear of social rejection or not fitting in with others. This is a raw and honest conversation about how Natasha navigated those fears with the added benefits of exposure and self-compassion! Let’s be honest, sometimes, we are afraid of being rejected by people we care about and also by those we don’t even know. If you haven’t subscribed to our podcast, please do so! Click here to listen to this episode: Apple Spotify Website Natasha's Instagram: @atparentingsurvival Natasha's Twitter: @atsurvival Cheering you on always, Dr. Z. (*) Receive weekly science-based, compassionate, and actionable skills to stop ineffective playing-it-safe: subscribe to the Playing-it-safe Newsletter: https://www.thisisdoctorz.com/playing-it-safe-newsletter/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.