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We’ve done Nephrology, Gynecology, and Phallology — but nothing prepared us for this. Penis implants. Road trip pees. Kegels. Bidets. Squirting. UTIs. Clitoral flim-flam. Elephant bladders. Everyone’s favorite Urologist, Dr. Fenwa Milhouse, makes chatting about the uh, juicy stuff effortless and easy. Like peeing should be. She humbly describes herself as a crotch plumber, but she’s so much more: a surgeon, a mentor and an inspiration.  Dr. Fenwa Milhouse on TikTok @yourfavoriteurologist or Instagram @DrMilhouse More links at Alieward.com/ologies/urology You may also enjoy our episodes on Nephrology (KIDNEYS), Gynecology (VULVAS AND SUCH), and Phallology (PENISES) A donation went to UrologyUnbound.org Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

Insects humming. Birds squawking. Chainsaws buzzing? What does the rainforest sound like? Or the oceans outside of port cities? Is the world getting louder? And what can recording devices detect that our ears – especially mine, Alie’s – can’t? Acoustic Ecologist Dr. Eddie Game of the Nature Conservancy has asked conservation questions over decades of work in 20 countries, and even though his microphone for this interview sucked, his stories and wisdom are a pleasure to hear. Also: is it okay to talk to owls? How much of timber harvesting is legal? And how do communities come together to protect the lands around them? Also: the most elusive and coolest midnight parrot.  Dr. Eddie Game is on Twitter A donation was made this week to The Nature Conservancy Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

If you LIVE for drama, you will LOVE dead Romans. Wars, backstabbing, opulence and uprisings: a little something for everyone. Classical Archeologist and TV host Dr. Darius Arya is back for an encore of this 2018 classic to dish about priceless garbage piles, lead poisoning, ancient political scandals, pottery graveyards, unearthing sculptures, tomb discoveries, what's under European cities, and how Roman society was a little like America these days. But also a lot different. With new bonus material recorded in April, 2022 in my sister’s garage.  Dr. Darius Arya's website, DariusAryaDigs.com. He's also on Twitter and Instagram @DariusAryaDigs A donation was made this week to AncientRomeLive.org Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

THE SQUIDMOBILE HAS ARRIVED. Get in losers; we’re talking cephalopods. Yes, she drives a vehicle with squid all over it and encourages people to text her, and we have this encore episode to prove it. The world's most impassioned squid nerd, Sarah McAnulty, gets locked in a basement with Alie to talk about cephalopods, alien DNA, camouflage, invisibility cloaks, why cute things make us bonkers, terrible mating strategies, cute and clever ones and why she is so charmed by squid. Also addressed: Philly accents and the Kraken. And why I am putting out an encore episode from a parking garage. The squid facts hotline can be reached at 1-833-SCI-TEXT aka 1-833-724-8398 Follow Dr. Sarah McAnulty on Twitter & Instagram @SarahMackAttack Sarah's Atlas Obscura classes, science trivia, book + more A donation was made this week to SkypeAScientist.com Follow Skype A Scientist on Twitter & Instagram Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

Oh boy. This episode may seeeeem crappy but it is certainly not a waste of your time. We’re not kidding, while the episode is of course wonderful, mostly thanks to our wonderful guests, it is also certainly about poopy wastewater and what we can all learn from it. About those terrific guests: we mostly speak with Dr. Amy E. Kirby, Ph.D., MPH of the frickin’ CDC (yes, that CDC) about the National Wastewater Surveillance System or NWSS. Did you know sewer water is not just a feature of teenage mutant ninja turtle habitats? Epidemiologists have been using the contents of our collectively owned chocolate waterfall to track disease since polio, but it was only in response to COVID-19 that the CDC launched the NWSS “to coordinate and build the nation’s capacity to track the presence of SARS-CoV-2.” So we learn a bit about what all that means, as we talk weird waste, medication levels in the water, whether or not “silent but deadly” is flim flam, and more in this absolutely gushing sluicegate of an ep. BUT WAIT. That’s not all. We got two little extra guests! First up, your ol’ Dadward did a prank call on Amy Narimatsu of Shorerivers.org, so she has a fun little cameo, and we conclude with previous virology guest, Dr. Shannon Bennett, of the California Academy of Sciences to discuss what’s happening with COVID these days, and why it’s important to stay safe for those who still need protection. It’s an absolutely bursting septic tank of an episode so… Hang on to your butts. Follow the CDC on Twitter Learn more about the CDC's National Wastewater Surveillance System Follow Dr. Bennett on Twitter A donation was made this week to ShoreRivers Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

The hedgehogs of the sea: echinoids are spiky, spiny, pokey, be-toothed, venomous, mysterious, gorgeous evolutionary marvels. And Dr. Rich Mooi of the California Academy of Arts & Sciences is one of their biggest champions. Come stroll through the offices for a face-to-face encounter with this infectious expert. We talk sand dollars, uni, doves of peace, fire urchins, kelp forests, tiny hats, butt placement, foot eyes and how to find your niche, even if it’s miles below the surface on a rotting log. And bonus at the very very end: a chat about the practicalities of owning an electric vehicle with a few sci-comm up-and-comers. Learn More About Dr. Rich Mooi A donation went to California Academy of Sciences Follow the California Academy of Arts and Science on Twitter More episode sources and links Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

Flesh hungry plants. The world’s fastest hunters. Botany with brains?  Seymour, it’s time to feed because we’re doing meat-eating plants with conservation ecologist and carnivorous phytobiologist, Hali’a Eastburn. Can a Venus Fly Trap digest human flesh? Do frogs think of pitcher plants as home or hell? How fast is a bladderwort? Are scientists anesthetizing plants? Why exactly DID they name a fly trap after the goddess of love? Also: homicidal plant tattoos, nature’s grossest vending machines, and what plants are most goth with a pair of real #bogbitches.  Follow Hali’a Eastburn on Twitter and Instagram Donations were made to North American Sarracenia Conservancy and Kauluakalana More episode sources and links Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

Pomodoro timers! Bullet journals! Apps, tips, tricks and philosophies. Also: the most mellow episode ever, recorded late at night in a guest room. Like a cozy duvet of wisdom, this one is full of life hacks for remaining productive & healthy during distracting times. I asked Ologites their best strategies for keeping their brains less burdened and organizing everything from schedules to leftovers to sock drawers.  In quick 5 chapters: Your Hot Bod Needs ThisHome is Where the Hard IsWrestling with Father TimeTricking Your Brain to Trick Your BrainEmo Stuff  Whether you’re neurotypical or not, this final follow up on the ADHD series is a catalogue of strategies to make future you happier. Also: some end-of-episode life updates from Dadward on why you’ve gotten re-runs for two weeks.  More episode links and resources  Donations went to the National Multiple Sclerosis Society and International Myeloma Foundation Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

The SMOL version of an ep about smol precious creatures, we're talkin' slimy little angels with bellies for feet... literally! That's what gastropod means! We've got Dr. Jann Vendetti of the Natural History Museum of LA County to talk with Alie about snail-based beauty products, escargot, urban snails, thousands and thousands of teeth, and whether or not you should adopt a rabbit-sized pet snail.  Click here for the full-sized, somewhat filthy version SLIME project at NHM.org More episode sources & links Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper Theme song by Harold Malcolm

Trains. Locomotives. Choochoos. Bullet trains. Hyperloops. Subways. How fast can they go? How did they change American history? Why do people love them? What should we do with all that abandoned track? Can you marry a train? What's it like to shovel coal into a steam engine? Alie went off the rails at the Henry Ford Museum in Dearborn, Michigan talking to an official ferroequinologist and curator Matt Anderson -- who confessed to some youthful railroad mischief, delivered a succinct slice of U.S. History, has train movie recommendations and discussed cars vs. trains in the great transportation debate. Also, why transporting isn't always about the trains. The Henry Ford Museum Railroad Exhibit More episode sources & links Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, pins, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper Theme song by Nick Thorburn

Did Part 1 leave you informed and now you need a pep talk? Get ready for an absolute banger of an episode with 5 experts: René Brooks of BlackGirlLostKeys.com, TEDTalk speaker and How to ADHD YouTuber Jessica McCabe and neuroscientist Jahla Osborne of University of Michigan. What is it like to get diagnosed? How do you know which medication – if any – is right for you? Why is there such a spike in ADHD diagnoses during the pandemic? Autism and ADHD: what’s the deal? What accommodations should a person ask for? How can you have a strong relationship with one (or more) ADHD brains? What if your boyfriend juggles flaming swords for fun? Sure there are tips and tricks, but get ready for the pep talk and self-acceptance honestly everyone needs to hear. Plus: two cameos from past Ologists: Dr. Tiara Moore (Forensic Ecology) and Dr. Adam Becker (Quantum Ontology). Oh, and how this relates to Alie’s own Dadbrain. HERE WE GO.  René Brooks of Black Girl Lost Keys on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook Jessica McCabe of How to ADHD on Twitter, Instagram, YouTube and TikTok Jahla Osborne on Twitter and Instagram And check out these previous episodes with our cameo guests: Forensic Ecology With Tiara Moore Quantum Ontology With Adam Becker Donations were made to CHADD, ADDA and FailSafe-ERA More episode sources and links Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

Focus. Productivity. Relationships. Distraction. Neurodiversity. How do you know if you have ADHD? How can you get others to understand your ADHD brain? What are your treatment options and how can they help? In Part 1, we talk racing thoughts, brilliant brains and the causes and effects of Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder with the world’s leading expert, Dr. Russell Barkley who is A BIG DEAL. Psychologist, retired professor of clinical psychiatry, author and speaker, Dr. Barkley has a personal connection to ADHD and has studied it for nearly 40 years. Is it all cute quirks? Nope. It’s serious business. But next week, we’ll hear about tips and tricks and self-love from 3 more experts — Jessica McCabe of How to ADHD, René Brooks of Black Girl Lost Keys and ADHD researcher Jahla Osborne. I’M TRYING NOT TO USE A BUNCH OF EXCLAMATION POINTS. It’s exciting.  Dr. Russell Barkley’s website dedicated to education and research on ADHD Dr. Barkley’s book, Taking Charge of Adult ADHD Donations were made to CHADD and Partners in Health More episode sources and links Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn  

Gather 'round fellow nerds, you’re about to learn about the wildest not a fern not a bush not a cactus plant you never knew you never knew about: CYCADS. These endangered ancient plants have been around for 270 million years, give or take, and now they’re some of the most valuable vegetation in the world. Come along to learn about these uncomfortably sexy gymnosperms and the international crimes people do to steal them. Also: neurotoxins, Jurassic Park, and one of the best fixes for procrastination we’ve ever heard with the world’s favorite botanist and cycadologist, Dr. Nathalie Nagalingum. Dr. Nathalie Nagalingum’s website Follow Dr. Nathalie Nagalingum on Twitter and tell her you love her Dr. Nagalingum’s profile at California Academy of Sciences Speaking of which, Alie will be moderating a Women in Science Nightlife event there coming up March 3rd, and you can get tickets for that here A donation was made to Ovarian Cancer Australia More episode links and sources Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

Ah, charismatic megafauna! Teeth, claws, fur, hibernation, bear hugs, hiking, cougar attacks, nature preserves, and living your childhood dreams with Alie’s longtime -ologist crush, Dr. Rae Wynn-Grant. The large carnivore ecologist, researcher and TV presenter tells us all about her field work, what it’s like to stuff a baby bear in your coat, how carnivore plasma may one day save your life, balancing a few different stellar careers at once and the launch of her own PBS podcast, Going Wild. Also: how to revive a bear you’ve given ketamine and surprises she’s found in the woods. We love her.  Dr. Rae Wynn-Grant’s website, Twitter, and Instagram Listen to Dr. Wynn-Grant’s podcast, Going Wild Follow Tsalani on Instagram for beautiful bear, wildlife & nature pics A donation went to Black Outside More episode sources and links Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Smologies (short, classroom-safe) episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

You have ants. We all have ants, but do we KNOW ants? Get ready for cult-leader queens, bullet ant stings, kitchen pest hacks, the dynamics of a billion-sister megacolony. Dr. Terry McGlynn sits down to have a BIG discussion about itty-bitty creatures in this encore because I was out of town seeing my family and just needed a week off. Learn about tropical ants, urban ants, how they walk on water, which ones are picky eaters, which ones make weird sounds, what ant movies are bunk, and some help-help takeaways. Also: sniffing your relatives before deciding to kill them. Ooooh, it’s a classic.  Dr. Terry McGlynn's website and Twitter A donation went to the SEEDS Field Trip fund More episode sources and links Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Steven Ray Morris & Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

Bundle up for a smol, classroom-friendly episode with Princeton University evolutionary biologist and Thermophysiologist Dr. Shane Campbell-Staton. You’ll learn about everything from heat tolerance to frostbite, anti-freeze woodfrogs to icy alligators, why some people run hot, why your toes run cold, how a fever is like a honeybee, how geography influences our body composition, why mammoths are big, and why you should grab your hat before running out the door. Also: what counts as “balmy” in Alaska.  Full, uncut, NSFW version of Thermophysiology plus research links More Smologies episodes Here is Dr. Campbell-Staton’s website and Twitter Listen to his podcast The Biology of Super Heroes Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Zeke Thomas Rodrigues & Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Smologies theme song by Harold Malcolm

Shoving elk into a dorm room freezer. The wildest tasting rice. Flower bulbs, acorn whoopie pies, frybread debates, mushroom foraging tips, corn magic, puffball mythology, decolonized diets, squash lasagna, bison harvests, small worlds, Instapots and – most importantly – food sovereignty with the WONDERFUL Indigikitchen cooking show host, environmental scientist Mariah Gladstone, who reminds us all that native foods aren’t a part of a past, but an essential and exciting aspect of the future.  LINK PARTY, SO MANY LINKS HERE Mariah’s website, Twitter and Instagram A donation was made to FASTBlackfeet.org Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, masks, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

I scream, you scream, we all scream for… a brand new, screaming hot episode of Ologies. Be warned *slaps the top of this ep* you can fit so many screams in this bad boy. (Seriously though, there’s a lot of screaming in this episode, it’s probably not the one to gently fall asleep to.) What kinds of screams you ask? We got birds, foxes, caterpillars, movie stars, children, James Bond? YES. What is a scream? Is it the same as yelling? How far can you hear a scream? Why do we scream at concerts? What’s up with primal scream therapy? Join us as we hoot and holler with internationally acclaimed Emory professor of psychology Dr. Harold Gouzoules for the answers to these and so many more of your questions as we learn about the study of that most animal of vocalizations: screaming. Dr. Gouzoules’s Emory University Bioacoustics Lab A donation was made to American Diabetes Association More episode sources and links Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, pins, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media

Slamming heads together to impress someone: why does this happen? Let’s ask Dr. Nicole Ackermans, whose current job involves receiving sheep heads and painstakingly counting damaged neurons from headbutting concussions. The Neuropathology episode last week gives all the concussion basics, but this one turns the microscope away from accidents and points it right at intentional behaviors in nature, from bighorn sheep to musk oxen, goats, woodpeckers, and some other animals that will freak you out. Also: questionable helmet ideas and horny hogs. Get all the background on head trauma, including my recent brainwhack concussion Check Dr. Nicole Ackerman's website and Twitter A donation was made to Society for Women's Health Research More episode sources and links Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts and bleeped episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, pins, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Sound editing by Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Transcripts by Emily White of The Wordary Website by Kelly R. Dwyer Theme song by Nick Thorburn

Games! Play! Fun! Addiction? Flim-flam? From the origins of tabletop classics to the future of VR, Dr. Jane McGonigal answers our burning questions. This video game developer, TED speaker and bestselling author is an expert on how playing -- and especially video games -- can motivate, soothe and connect us. Will video games turn your child into a future car thief? How do they make you stronger? How much is too much? What about slot machines? Everyone who loves games (and everyone who hates games) should hear this one. The uncut, adult version of Ludology plus research links More Smologies episodes Dr. McGonigal’s website and Twitter Dr. McGonigal’s new book “Imaginable” is due out March 22, 2022 A donation went to AbleGamers   Sponsors of Ologies Transcripts & bleeped episodes Become a patron of Ologies for as little as a buck a month OlogiesMerch.com has hats, shirts, pins, totes! Follow @Ologies on Twitter and Instagram Follow @AlieWard on Twitter and Instagram Editing by Zeke Rodrigues Thomas & Jarrett Sleeper of MindJam Media Smologies theme song by Harold Malcolm Special thanks to Susan Hale, Noel Dilworth, Kelly Dwyer and Emily White