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Today we hear from Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Bill Maher, Anthony Jeselnik, Bill Hicks, and David Letterman, as we compare and contrast French Speech Codes and the First Amendment, with private sector censorship. QUOTABLE @ 13:58 "Fifteen rapes, that is beyond the pale at NBC. Maybe over at ABC, maybe over at Disney, maybe they have a different policy. Maybe the number over there is seventeen or eighteen rapes." ~Mark Whitney, Creator/Performer, 'My Official Show' Enter your email address: Delivered by FeedBurner

QUOTABLE "You can't buy a Congressman a meal, if they sit down and use a fork and a knife. But if they stand up and they use their fingers, that they can do. ~Jack Abramoff "I'm suspicious of anyone who wants to be President. If you're President of the United you have to light the Christmas tree, you have to pardon the turkey, you have do that fucking Easter Egg Roll. I'd just want to kill myself!" ~Mark Whitney, Creator/Performer, 'My Official Show' Enter your email address: Delivered by FeedBurner

"If you don't want to get killed, don't show up in front of me. It's that simple." St. Louis County Cop, Dan Page In his caught-on-tape manifesto, recently "retired" St. Louis County Cop, Dan Page -- a self-identified extremist -- puts the lie to the narrative that we as citizens do not have any influence over the political system in the United States. Listen up while Dan Page rips women and gays in the military, "sodomites" on the Supreme Court and threatens multiple times to kill anyone who gets in his way as he leads the Missouri Militia to victory over the Federal government. Dan Page is the face of the 20-30 million lunatic fringe and these people vote, leaving moderate Republicans no choice but to hedge when it comes to embracing principles of equal justice in a modern world. Enter your email address: Delivered by FeedBurner

The FBI tells the DOJ the former CIA Director, General David Petraeus, should be prosecuted for leaking classified information to his mistress/biographer. What does John Kiriakou, the only CIA Agent to be sentenced to Federal prison since September 11, 2001, have to say about criminal justice in the United States? What are the two things Petraeus has in common with Kiriakou? And, how did Petraeus affirmatively mislead the citizenry in the immediate aftermath of Kiriakou's sentencing? Enter your email address: Delivered by FeedBurner

TRANSCRIPT This is more than a show. It's surgery with a meat axe. I have Chris Christie caught in a lie. Christie could learn a lot from a felon and we hear from three of them today; four if you include yours truly. Two days before former Virginia Governor Bob McDonnell was to be sentenced to Federal prison for honest services wire fraud, former U.S. Attorney for the District of New Jersey, Chris Christie, showed up in the skybox with Dallas Cowboys owner, Jerry Jones, thereby raising suspicion about a similar corrupt relationship. Listen to the infamous, convicted lobbyist, Jack Abramoff and former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich on the consequences of being blind to one's own corruption and the importance of humility. I also play a clip from my one man show re-enacting the day nearly a quarter century ago when I said goodbye to my wife and sons on the eve of surrendering to Federal prison and explain how I am the only U.S. Citizen to serve Federal time for mistitling a Cowmobile. Yes -- a Cowmobile. Enjoy! --Mark Whitney Creator/Performer My Official Show Enter your email address: Delivered by FeedBurner

I thought we were done with shows for 2014. But the recent peaceful protest at the Mall of America called me back to the studio where, as a former Federal prisoner who personally witnessed the results of America's racist War On Drugs, I spin a monologu...

A new year is an opportunity to take stock, reset and start afresh. Do you have a personal failure you need to own in the new year? What does it mean to take responsibility? On our last show for 2014, we hear from recovering alcoholic, Craig Ferguson, a bank robber turned jailhouse lawyer turned law clerk for Judge Janice Rogers Brown, of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the D.C. Circuit, an infamous mystery woman to be revealed, as well as myself (also a former jailhouse lawyer). The B Story of today's show contemplates the question of who is ripe for attack by political satirists. Enter your email address: Delivered by FeedBurner FEATURING Shadoe Stevens: Official Announcer of My Official Show CAST OF CHARACTERS Mystery Woman Recovering Alchoholic, Craig Ferguson Shon Hopwood, Author of Lawman Christopher Hitchens Arianna Huffington Paul Krassner Donald Thompson, The Penis Pump Judge James Clapper, Director of National Intelligence George Tenet, Former Director CIA  

"Aristotle said: 'The rule of law is better than the rule of any one individual.' For good reason. Take the most recent two presidents: The bilateral one shoves dinner up your ass. The unilateral one shoots a missile up your ass. Today’s show is set against the backdrop of two political parties sanctimoniously debating torture, when every member of Congress from both parties knows full well the authority post-9/11 presidents rely on to commit unlawful atrocities and human rights abuses: The 59 word domestic law passed 518-1 on September 18, 2001; one week after 9-11. We also check in with the 50 year old, admitted CIA Torturer due to be released from Federal prison on May 1, 2015. He did not go quietly. And if that's not enough, you will also learn why U.S. Officials and U.S. Nationals can never be tried by the International Criminal Court for the war crime of Aggression. I’ve said this before, I’ll say it again: 'This is our best show yet!' Subscribe for free and with every bi-weekly upload you will feel a vibration in your pants. That's the My Official Show guarantee!" ~MW Enter your email address: Delivered by FeedBurner FEATURING Shadoe Stevens: Official Announcer of My Official Show Karen Wilson: Official Sidekick of My Official Show CAST OF CHARACTERS Barack Obama 00:55 South Park's Surgeon General 02:30 Wolf Blitzer 03:25 Former CIA Director Michael Hayden 03:42 Fox News's Bret Baier 04:55 Dick Cheney 05:06 Whistleblower John Kiriakou 15:19 Sarah Palin 17:13 Former Bush DOJ Ethics Attorney, Now Whistleblower Defense Counsel, Jesselyn Radack 21:23 Attorney General Eric Holder 26:58 Director of National Intelligence, James Clapper 33:32 Dianne Feinstein 34:13 CIA Director James Brennan 34:38 Senator Mark Udall 34:56 ABC News's Jake Tapper to White House Press Secretary Jay Carney 36:57 Shepard Smith 43:58 FBI Director Robert Mueller 43:58 Secretary of Defensse Robert Gates 49:14 State Department Legal Advisor Harold Koh 64:43 George W. Bush 78:25 QUOTABLE 4:55 Brett Baier: But at one point, the report describes interrogators pureeing food of one detainee and inserting it in his anus; something the agency called 'Rectal Rehydration.' I mean, is that torture? Cheney: Ah -- um -- I ah -- I don't know anything about that specific instance. I can't speak to that. That was not one of the -- ah -- authorized or approved techniques. There were twelve of them as I recall. Karen: Laughter. Mark: They're not authorized to p

Litigation is a machine you enter as a pig and come out as a sausage. Imagine you want to open a frat house: (a) Where do you get insurance? (b) Who pays the premium? (c) Who pays the claim when Junior steps on his dick? (d) Why does your alma mater secretly love fraternities? Against the backdrop of the ongoing national discussion about rape and leveraging personal stories related to my own experience with the Federal criminal justice system, today we spin another great monologue. And in the course of identifying economic winners and losers, I go off on an epic rant about my love/hate relationship with the law and explain why nobody -- and I mean nobody -- really knows what the law is. Enter your email address:Delivered by FeedBurner QUOTABLE "If you are a drunk driver and you run somebody down and kill them, the fact that you were drunk is not a defense. You can't say, 'I was drunk, your Honor. Let me go home!' Because then everyone would be getting drunk before they killed the person they hated." "The fact that a woman is drunk is not consent to sex. The fact that she squeezes her ass into some hot jeans, puts on a tube top, and shows up 18 years old, at a frat house, on Friday night, and gets drunk -- is not consent. It is not implied; it's nothing. It's just not. If she gets so drunk she's unable to consent one way or the other, that's rape." "When The Virginia Gentlemen sing: 'Don't ever let a Virginia Man an inch above your knee. He'll take you to his fraternity house and fill you full of beer and soon you'll be the mother of a bastard Cavalier' -- that's rape in 50 states." (See, e.g. Code of Virginia § 18.2-61. Rape. "If any person has sexual intercourse through the use of the complaining witness's mental incapacity or physical helplessness he or she shall be guilty of rape.") (emphasis added) "The People actually got to see Eric Garner die. The people are not as innocent as they were even 10 years ago. And that's a good thing." "If you black people weren't there, white cops wouldn't have to shoot you. That's Rudy Guiliani." "The difference between civil litigation and criminal litigation? Civil litigation is about money. Criminal litigation is about time." Caitlin Flanagan, The Dark Power of Fraternities "One warm spring night in 2011, a young man named Travis Hughes stood on the back deck of the Alpha Tau Omega fraternity house at Marshall University, in West Virginia, and was struck by what seemed to him—under the influence of powe

The Virginia Gentlemen sing about drunken debauchery in the great tradition of Cavaliers. This is our best show yet, produced against the backdrop of accusations against three storied American Institutions: The University of Virginia, the United States Military and Bill Cosby. For 17 years, 364 days you are in the custody of your parents. Then suddenly you are 18 and directly accountable to law enforcement. Now what? Enter your email address:Delivered by FeedBurner----- QUOTABLE "This is to the men: Take your penis in your hand, right now and instead of stroking it, just set it aside -- just set your penis aside for a minute and just listen to what the women are saying." "How tough does a bitch have to be to exist in society?" "You spike the punch. Your friend puts his penis in the helpless first year. Your friend is guilty of rape. You're guilty of conspiracy to commit rape." "In our system, when you turn 18, you are legally accountable to every law that's ever been written." "I don't have to deal with the issue of penetration as a man. The only thing my wife's been trying to penetrate for 33 years is my skull." "If you're a fraternity and you're spiking the punch or you're in a conspiracy to dole out roofies to incapacitate people, to put them in a position where they are not legally able to give consent, you are now putting yourself in jeopardy of being tried for rape." "Can we just get back to fucking and can you ugly women get out of our way? We gotta' good thing going. We create the organization. We buy the fraternity house fair and square. We make the payments. We buy the alcohol. We give it to ya' for free. Suck my dick for Christ's sake! Fuck me! No?! Take this pill. That will help you relax. Not only will this help you relax, but as Bill Cosby knows, it will prevent you from being able to testify." "If I had a daughter, I would want to make sure she knew if she's off to the University of Virginia, I would want to have a very serious conversation with my daughter and I would hope that I had raised a daughter who is independent enough and secure enough that she doesn't require validation by these limp-dicked drunk fucks at the fraternity. That she would want nothing to do with that scene on Friday and Saturday night. That she would not show up in a tube top with her midriff exposed, poured into her jeans, advertising: 'Fuck me!' I would hope that I raised my daughter to know better than to put herself in that situation where through no fa