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Life, Love & Leadership with Dr. James & Marissa Q. Paine
35 minutes | Feb 23, 2021
S2- EP24- Bonus Episode Live from Instep Church
SURPRISE! In this bonus episode Marissa has Valentine's Day on the brain and doesn't quite understand what all the fuss is about (2:25). James is feeling grateful for his health after undergoing oral surgery earlier in the month that left him both weak and feeble (6:15) For the fight of the week our hosts debate on whether or not an apology is actually always necessary (9:22) During the big idea, the couple dives deeper into the 25 lessons they've learned over the course of their 25 year marriage (18:12)
19 minutes | Feb 9, 2021
S2- EP 23- Best of Season 2 Rewind #3
As we near the end of this season, our hosts spend time reflecting on the best moments of season 2.
24 minutes | Jan 26, 2021
S2- EP 22- Best of Season 2 Rewind #2
As we near the end of this season, our hosts spend time reflecting on the best moments of season 2.
34 minutes | Jan 12, 2021
S2- EP 21- Best Of Season 2 Rewind
As we near the end of season 2, our hosts spend time reflecting on their favorite moments with featured guests.
42 minutes | Dec 29, 2020
S2- EP20- Issue Spotting
This week, a recent celebration of life has Marissa reflecting on the true strength of love (4:45). James spends time pondering the quote “addictions are reactions to emotions we can’t handle”(12:03). The fight of the week is sparked by an impulsive gift James bought their daughter leaving Marissa feeling as if he had gone behind her back (15:50). For the big idea, James speaks about the importance of issue spotting in relationships to avoid big blowouts down the road (23:50). For homework, the hosts urge listeners to spend time with their partner being intentional about talking through all unresolved issues from the week prior (34:03). The hosts end the show offering marriage advice to newlywed listener, Michelle (35:25).
44 minutes | Dec 22, 2020
S2-EP19- The Funniest Fight of the Week
This week Marissa spoke a lot about what wasn’t on her mind (2:39) before eventually deciding that ultimately, she couldn’t stop thinking about Christmas (8:13). James has spent his week reflecting on yet another quote, and you must ask yourself, are you really surprised? (13:40) This week’s fight of the week was sparked by a simple 2 letter word but ended in laughter as surprise guest, Jewell, countered James’ argument with words from his own mouth just a few episodes earlier in the season (18:38). This week’s big idea focused on the importance of strengthening your self-esteem (29:50).
45 minutes | Dec 15, 2020
S2- EP18- Inquiring Minds Want to Know: Met and Married in a Pandemic
In the third and final episode of the series: Inquiring Minds Want to know, our hosts sit down with two newly married couples who managed to find love in a pandemic.
54 minutes | Dec 8, 2020
S2- EP 17- Inquiring Minds Want to Know: Bachelor Edition
This week Dr. James and Marissa Paine speak with Chris, David, and Justin as they continue the three part singles' series 'Inquiring Minds Want to Know'.
55 minutes | Dec 1, 2020
S2- EP16- Inquiring Minds Want to Know: Ladies First
This week Dr. James and Marissa Paine speak with Cindy, Lynette, and Rhoshay to kick off the three part singles' series 'Inquiring Minds Want to Know'.
49 minutes | Nov 24, 2020
S2- EP15- Growing Up Paine
This week the hosts sit down with their three young adult children for the second annual Thanksgiving week special and cover everything from dating and hookup culture to growing up Paine.
40 minutes | Nov 17, 2020
S2- EP14- Type A Times Two
This week Marissa has a serious case of travel fatigue and finally knows what Dorothy meant when she said ‘there’s no place like home,’ (3:50). James gets sappy and opens up about how home is no place without Marissa (8:22). For the fight of the week, the hosts spend time talking about the new reality TV show, ‘Put a Ring on it’, and whether or not it serves as an effective relationship strategy (11:26). For the big idea, James teaches listeners how to have a successful relationship with two dominant type A personalities, (25:23). For homework, listeners are asked to spend time reflecting on battle lines drawn in their relationship, revisit them in the spirit of compromise in a way that allows the relationship, not just individuals, to win, (38:50).
42 minutes | Nov 10, 2020
S2-EP13-Money in Marriage
This week Marissa has 2020 on her mind and she’s asking the question we all have been wondering: what even was this year? (2:45) James spends time reflecting on the quote “wisdom is seeing tomorrow’s consequences in today’s activities” (8:17). The hosts sit down with financial expert Cathey Williamson of the Williamson financial group to answer the most common questions surrounding marriage and money (11:41). For homework, James tasks listeners with spending time talking about beliefs and assumptions surrounding money and having that conversation with your partner (39:46).
42 minutes | Nov 4, 2020
S2-EP12- In Pursuit of Purpose
This week Marissa is thinking about the double standard of leaders in the faith community (3:34). James expresses his concerns surrounding professional sports and the effectiveness of their COVID policies (12:40). Still in a honeymoon phase of sorts, the hosts didn’t have a fight to discuss this week. While it isn’t required to spend a lot of money on a vow renewal to rekindle the flame in your marriage, apparently, it doesn’t hurt (16:18). For the big idea, James speaks on the importance of living out the most authentic version of yourself (25:13). For homework, listeners should spend time getting crystal clear on their purpose (40:21).
37 minutes | Oct 27, 2020
S2-EP11- Intention Deficit Disorder
This week Marissa has single-ness on her mind and wonders what it truly means to be single (2:25) while James is thinking about rebounding and how people on social media seem to quickly jump from one relationship to the next (9:22). In the fight of the week Marissa expresses her frustration surrounding the treatment of her car and they reach a resolution on behavior going forward (14:26). James dives deep into Intention Deficit Disorder in this week’s big idea and gives listeners 3 key steps to setting intentions for intimate partner relationships (19:54). For homework, listeners are asked to reflect on the purpose of their relationship and establish or reaffirm their plans (29:34). Finally, Marissa answers a listener’s question on how to best deal with her husbands sex addiction (29:53).
40 minutes | Oct 20, 2020
S2-EP10- We Suck At Apologies
This week Marissa is thinking about gender roles and how they factor into the success of a relationship (13:22) while James has found another quote to spend time reflecting on (13:22). The fight of the week is so fresh it continues briefly as they spend time reflecting on angry chew pt. 2 (18:14). For the big idea, James touches on 5 things to watch out for when working to grow personal maturity (30:20). For homework, listeners are asked to examine their most recent relationship conflict and reflect on how a more mature personal response would have resulted in a better outcome (35:40). The show wraps with hosts answering a listener's question: are men and women created equal (36:26)?
37 minutes | Oct 13, 2020
S2-EP09- The Race Card
This week Marissa struggles to get her life together (3:17). A recovering work-aholic, Marissa is still searching to find the perfect work/life balance as her new exercise bike that was supposed to help collects dust in the living room. James spends time reflecting on the Ralph Waldo Emerson quote, “envy is ignorance and imitation is suicide,” (11:02). The fight of the week focuses on racism in America and how it affects the Black experience (14:31). This week's big idea is the importance of majoring in your mate (26:31) and James assigns listeners to get reacquainted with their partners for homework and learn more about what makes them who they are (35:25).
41 minutes | Oct 6, 2020
S2-EP08- Poop Protocol
This week Marissa schools James on poop protocol (3:13) while James is focused on transitioning to the one true indicator of old age: bifocals (8:19). The fight of the week deals with the couples’ differing definitions of proper restaurant etiquette (10:44). James goes deeper into 3 major benefits of conflict in relationships (21:30) and tasks listeners with confronting some of the elephants in your relationship (31:12). This week, the hosts get to offer advice to a listener struggling with navigating abuse in a very public relationship (31:35).
43 minutes | Sep 29, 2020
S2-EP07- Cheating Defined
This week, Marissa has a recent question trending on social media on her mind (1:46). What seems to be an easy choice for both the Dr. and Mrs. leads into an even larger discussion surrounding the stigma with engagement rings altogether. James has his mind focused on the current state of academia and what the current switch to majority online school will mean for the job market in the coming years (13:02). During the Fight of the Week, they dive deep into cheating: defining what it is and giving insight on what to do about it (17:58). The big idea was so big last week that it’s spilling over: boundaries, part two. They take the time to explore the importance of personal boundaries within a marriage and the complex intersectionality boundaries have with faith (28:54).
41 minutes | Sep 22, 2020
S2-EP06- Avoiding Situationships
This week Marissa has a bone to pick with major television shows and the way they portray first ladies (1:41). Honestly, she’s over the constant angry black woman stereotype and other microaggressions this role perpetuates. James is grappling with something a little heavier this week: to buy or not to buy… Jordan’s that is (11:20). He’s thinking about sneakers. On one hand there’s a level of nostalgia, who knows he might get back on the court one day, but then again, we’d hate a repeat of the watch debacle of last season. Decisions, decisions, ultimately they’ll need your vote so be sure to tune in this Thursday in the Facebook group-- live at 7PM CST. This week’s fight of the week involves another popular celebrity couple, Steph and Ayeesha Curry (16:53). More of a conversation than a fight, is it healthy to want attention from anyone beyond your spouse? Tackling this question leads into this week's big idea: boundaries. James gets clear on important boundaries crucial for developing and maintaining a successful marriage and Marissa uses personal experiences to highlight the importance of fulfilling all your needs first and not relying on your partner to feel whole. Most importantly, homework (39:26)! Spend time reevaluating your relationship boundaries to make sure they make a strong foundation.
45 minutes | Sep 15, 2020
S2-EP05- Blending Families
This week Marissa is experiencing ‘bride brain’. Yes, apparently it’s a real thing and she is ready to get her brain back after the vow renewal (2:02). James, of course, has something philosophical on his mind and has spent the week reflecting on the quote “what you hold in your mind shows up in your life” (5:43). James and Marissa then sit down with Rachel Jackson, Pastor Rashon Jordan and First Lady Jordan to continue last week's discussion on blended families (8:57). All three of this week's guests are currently living in blended families and spend time sharing their personal experiences with blending families in dating and marriage.
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