Listen Now

Dustin doesn't learn any lessons about socks or otherwise, Thomas thinks the first Godfather is a bad movie, William wet the bed longer than he should have, and David learns that the dream of new socks every day will actually ruin your feet. Also, Dennis Rodman is a traitor, ancient Greeks fighting blue whales, Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home is the best Star Trek movie, Uwe Boll's movies, and more!

Dustin's attempt to give Thomas a gift is brutally rebuffed, Thomas is still addicted to Dota 2, William is oddly excited about Transformers 4's Dinobots, and David is still mad about Left 4 Dead 2. Also, Micheal Bay's sexism and/or racism, Twitch Plays Pokemon, Steven Seagal runs like a girl, the conspiracy theory that explains the bad Pixar movies, why no one should ever say "thug", and more!

Dustin returns to the podcast with tales about how his father took thousands of dollars of inheritance from him and how his bank and a tow-truck driver conspired to swindle him. Thomas, meanwhile, is incredibly upset by the idea that he and Dustin are similar or close in any way because of his inherent antipathy towards males. Also, global warming, burnt coal slush, a black metal murderer, the Norwegian prison system, arguments about who exactly has the right to be butthurt, bulldozers, and more!

Dustin discovers that his pendulous gnads can overlap his girlfriend's entire face and Thomas thinks about the things we can't think about because they don't exist.

Dustin wants to ghost bust realistic ghosts and Thomas is a fan of ethereal suicide residuum, ghost ships, and banshees.

Dustin feels sorry for a mummy that sucks souls out of old assholes, Thomas wants to watch “Oh God, I Woke Up Next to Steve Buscemi", William is sick of perfectly good talent shows being ruined by stories of human drama, and David’s game “Another Castle" rips off Jonathan Blow and Mario.

Dustin doesn't glorify high school and Thomas wants his DVD back, goddamnit.

Dustin clown cars it and Thomas gets super lice. www.FTRTpodcast.com

Dustin is forlorn and Thomas wants people to hate him. www.FTRTpodcast.com

Dustin learns to drive and Thomas says "literally" too much.