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Enough Wicker: Intellectualizing the Golden Girls
23 minutes | 5 days ago
Episode 35: How DO you spell 'Saskatchewan'?
There is nothing worse than watching your friend suffer because their romantic life is in the garbage. Well, actually catfishing that friend by assuming the identity of one Mr. Issac Q. Newton, a citrus farmer from central Canada might be. Blanche and Dorothy have their hearts in the right place, but no one knows where the hell their brains are when they try to trick Rose out of her dating slump. Meanwhile, Sophia tries to fight off the advances of an English golddigger.
29 minutes | 12 days ago
Episode 34: Gaugins?! What Are You, A Pervert?!
Dorothy's job hunt isn't going well, so Blanche insists she comes and works with her at the museum. It sounds great at first, but when their loser boss Mr. Allen asks Dorothy to discreetly work on something, Blanche gets territorial. Specifically, she tells Dorothy to 'eat dirt and die, trash,' so things get a little tense at home and in the office. All the while Rose introduces us to the first iteration of recurring guest star, Dreyfus. Plus, Lauren and Sarah ruin two of your favorite things: surprises and dogs.
23 minutes | 19 days ago
Episode 33: When the Revolution Comes, You'll Be Glad You Don't Got a View
Ok now everybody SHUT THE HELL UP. We're talking about Vacation, arguably the goofiest episode of the first season. Dorothy, Blanche, and Rose go on a vacation that starts with a skeezy motel and ends with the three of them shipwrecked on a deserted island thanks to the subpar sailing skills of their new friends. Meanwhile, Sophia tries to woo the gardener, which is mostly cute to watch, though her tactics involve quite a few microaggressions.
25 minutes | a month ago
Episode 32: Michael and Bridget Share More Than A Cab
When Dorothy's son Michael and Rose's daughter Bridget visit at the same time, the seemingly inevitable happens, and the two share a night of so-so sex (too much wine) in Blanche's bed. Because this is a sitcom, all four of the women walk in on them, and the awkwardness makes for a really awkward and icky confrontation between Dorothy and Rose.
25 minutes | a month ago
Episode 31: The Widdah Spencer is Cuter than an Intrauterine
Happy Halloween! It is the perfect time to get out your bolo tie because Big Daddy Hollingsworth is back in Miami! This time to introduce Blanche to his would-be bride, Margaret Spencer, aka the Widow (pronounced Widdah) Spencer. Excited at first, Blanche's enthusiasm quickly deflates when she realizes Margaret is barely 40, or as Blanche puts it, "practically my age." Meanwhile, Dorothy and Rose enter a songwriting contest and butt heads over whether or not an extra "Miami is Nice" hurts the music. This episode is, in every sense, a hootnanny.
26 minutes | a month ago
Episode 30: Isn't Danny Thomas One?
Dorothy's college roommate and all-around lovely person Jean is in town for a visit. Though she lives her life out and proud, Rose's fascination with ice cream sundaes and Blanche's immediate insistence that she go out with a man from the discard pile inspires Jean to keep the lesbian thing her hat. But you know what they say about the Lebanese--they bring a u-haul to the second date. Jean finds herself IN LOVE with Rose, a woman she met three days prior. This one is full of laughs, tender moments, and puts a queer character--not the sexuality of a queer character--at the center of the story.
30 minutes | 2 months ago
Episode 29: RIP Pfreida Claxton
There is nothing like civic participation. In this episode, we see all four ladies rally together to save an old Oak tree on Richmond Street. While their petitioning tactics vary (and are sometimes questionable), it is admirable to see how seriously they take environmental and historical conservation. The girls have a formidable opponent in Freida Claxton, a crotchety peeping tom of a neighbor who insists the county get rid of the tree, and when Freida pushes Rose to pfar, she is forced to take matters into her own hands.
68 minutes | 2 months ago
A Very Special Episode with Very Special Guest Debbie Macey!
We sat down with the lovely and brilliant Deborah A. Macey, a communications scholar currently teaching at the University of Portland, to talk about her paper, Ancient Archetypes in Modern Media: A Comparative Analysis of Golden Girls, Living Single, and Sex & The City. In this interview, our new pal Debbie regales us with how she came up with her dissertation topic and how she went about assigning each of the girls to their designated archetype, a challenge considering how much "slippage" there is between the fab four. PS. For all those cold Saturday nights when you're looking to curl up with a good book, these are the works Debbie cites in the interview: Gendered Lives: Communication, Gender, and Culture by Julia T. Wood Goddesses in Everywoman: Powerful Archetypes in Women's Lives by Jean Shinoda Bolen The Goddess: Mythological Images of the Feminine by Christine Downing The Implied Spider: Politics & Theology in Myth by Wendy Doniger
26 minutes | 2 months ago
Episode 28: Feeling Magenta? Eat a BLP!
Stanley, king of the yutzes, shows up and needs a friend. Since Dorothy is busy with her new naval officer boyfriend, she calls in a favor from Blanche. The two hit it off platonically, but their new-found closeness still leaves Dorothy feeling a little jealous, confused, angry--magenta--all of which becomes exacerbated by the end of her own relationship. Meanwhile, Rose and Sophia team up to muscle in on Johnny No Thumbs by selling sandwiches at a construction site, a standard business venture for a couple of aging women.
21 minutes | 2 months ago
Episode 27: Burt, Butter, and Payback
In what can only be described as a classic, the girls win three tickets to see Mr. Burt Reynolds (who really appears in this episode and apparently wears monogrammed underwear) at a star-studded event. Ever the Tonto of the group, Sophia is left out and while Dorothy, Blanche, and Rose feel bad for a moment, they mostly think 'WHO CARES!" The tables turn, however, when the girls are arrested and need Sophia to bail them out. During their time in the slammer, Rose works through a nonsensical adolescent trauma, Blanche's inherent biases around class are revealed, and Dorothy rags on the public school system. All in all, this one is a real knee-slapper.
28 minutes | 2 months ago
Episode 26: Minks, Menopause, and Stuff in a Garage
In the first episode of the second season, Dorothy and Rose are doing something completely out of character--breeding minks in their garage! While the B-story is whacky, the A-story of Blanche confronting menopause and all that comes with it makes for a wildly progressive (and hilarious) episode.
27 minutes | 2 months ago
Episode 25: Golden Origins
In the final episode of the first season, the girls revisit how they met. Mr. Peepers, Madame Zelda, and Rose’s tactic for finding the perfect melon all emerge as unsung heroes in this hilarious wrap-up.
20 minutes | 3 months ago
E24: Get Out the Boots, He's Back!
Big Daddy Hollingsworth is in town with his antebellum lexicon and a gee-tar, as he informs Blanche that he sold the entire estate in order to pursue a country music singing career. Meanwhile, Dorothy and Sophia deal with Mr. Barton, aka "Mouth" and his complete disregard of neighborly responsibility through both civic involvement and the old stand-by, a Sicilian curse. PS. Go to EnougWicker.com to check out the Golden Girls Starter Kit you heard about at the beginning of this episode and get ready to start spamming your novice friends!
20 minutes | 3 months ago
Episode 23: Flying Blind
Turn on Channel 5, Lily burned the house down! Well, almost. Rose’s sister Lily, who recently lost her sight, comes for a visit, and the rest of the girls prep for the first of many garage sales at 6151 Richmond. The two stories allow the audience to bear witness to two equally difficult struggles: adjusting to life as a blind person and parting with a hockey stick once used by Bobby Hull.
22 minutes | 3 months ago
Episode 22: Pretty Jumpy About Rose's Career Prospects
When Rose is laid off from her job as a grief counselor, she does what anyone would do---starts a pro bono 24-hour counseling service out of her home without telling anyone else that lives there. When that gets out of hand (pretty much right way, if you can believe it), Dorothy and Blanche step in to help their defeated friend in what turns out to be a very tender moment.
21 minutes | 3 months ago
Episode 21: The Girls Get The Flu and We Get Our First Vibrator Joke
The flu knocks out Blanche, Dorothy, and Rose just in time for the charity event of the season. The girls, sick and irritable, are at each other's throats over the misplacement of a Nyquil cup and a stolen heating pad. They force their recovery, however, when Sophia reveals a rumor that one of them is winning the big award at the banquet.
22 minutes | 4 months ago
Episode 20: Bim, Bam, Boom, Sexual Harassment is Still a Huge Problem
In this one, Blanche is pursuing a [deleted by authority of the Governor] degree at a local community college, and is sexually harassed by the ultra-creepy Professor Cooper. She shows courage and determination as she deals with handling this is an environment that values a man's word over a woman's, and Dorothy shows the same qualities while she tries to secure Frank Sinatra tickets.
22 minutes | 4 months ago
Episode 19: Plumbers, Private Jets, and Misogyny
In this one, uh, Lou, Dorothy and Rose attempt to re-do their bathroom in the name of feminism, and Blanche contemplates marrying an old, rich man who uses racial slurs aboard his private jet. Plus, an homage to the late, great Rue la Rue cafe and an emphatic celebration of Sarah's husband's carpentry skills!
19 minutes | 4 months ago
Episode 18: A Case of Morton's Neuroma and the Perils of the American Healthcare System
Dorothy's dreams of appearing on stage with her tap team, Rose and Blanche, are dashed when she discovers she has a small tumor that needs to be removed. We validate Dorothy's fears of seeking help in a healthcare system that is barely functioning, celebrate her roommate and under-appreciated guest star, Bonnie (played by the late, great Anne Haney) and emphatically endorse old ladies drinking sherry in the park.
26 minutes | 4 months ago
Episode 17: Lucy, Crockett, and Tubbs
Blanche's niece Lucy is in town and arrives with a bang (literally). The girls become concerned with Lucy's promiscuity, all while debating how to handle a field mouse who has taken up residency in their kitchen. Eventually, Blanche is able to offer Lucy some powerful words on self-respect and knowing your worth, and Rose finally finds a friend who appreciates her brain, if only for the vast amounts of useless Miami Vice knowledge it holds.
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