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Dear White Women

213 Episodes

42 minutes | Mar 28, 2023
212: What Does a Lobbyist Actually Do? with David Louie
I hear the word lobbying and used to envision some sort of dark mysterious magic taking place.  But it turns out there are some very forthright, thoughtful individuals who play the role of lobbyist - being hired because they know something about how the legislative process works, willing to give advice and defend positions about what they think is right when it comes to regulating companies and advocating for or against policies that will impact the folks living in our country.     Today, we speak with one of those fantastic individuals, David Louie.  David is a former Attorney General of Hawaii and lobbyist for firms including Meta and Airbnb.  So grateful that he was willing to share this time with us on the podcast so we can learn first-hand about what lobbying means for individuals, and for the future of our democracy!   And a note to all you lawyers out there: add “lobbyist” as a potential career path if you want to use your advocacy skills in a different, yet similar, way…   What to listen for: The actual definition of a lobbyist, and what skill sets and experience are useful in the field What sources of information and pressure a lobbyist has to consider Ways interactions with legislators can go – whether it’s easy to get meetings, and more How the system of lobbying affects our ability to make sound decisions in this country – and whether it’s helping or hurting us as a democracy  About David Louie:  David M. Louie is a civil trial lawyer at Kobayashi Sugita & Goda, LLP in Honolulu, Hawai‘i—handling complex commercial litigation, construction defect claims, catastrophic personal injury defense, constitutional issues for the State of Hawai‘i, government affairs, and lobbying—and also serves as a mediator and arbitrator. He was Hawai‘i’s attorney general from 2011 to 2014, providing advice, counsel, and representation to the governor, cabinet, legislature, State agencies, and employees. He has served as president, vice president, and director of the Hawai‘i State Bar Association, as Lawyer Representative for the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals, and as Northwest Regional Governor for the National Asian-Pacific American Bar Association. He graduated from Occidental College and Berkeley Law School and currently lives in Honolulu.
46 minutes | Mar 21, 2023
211: The Role of District Attorneys in Mass Incarceration in America
If you’ve ever watched an episode of Law and Order, you’ll know Jack McCoy, who was the District Attorney (with a capital D and A) in that show. Together with his team, Jack McCoy made decisions about a lot of people’s guilt or innocence and argued that in court. Typically, when we think about a criminal trial, there are two phases: culpability, and sentencing. So in the first phase, either the judge or jury decides if the defendant is guilty or not, and then, if the defendant is found guilty, in that second phase, the judge or jury decides what that sentence should be.  But aside from that, it’s true that a lot of us don’t know what DAs do, or what their role is with regard to mass incarceration. Let’s get a little more analytical than Law and Order, and by the end of this episode, we hope you not only know more about what your DAs do, but have some ideas of how to hold them accountable, just like they hold us accountable.    What to listen for: What the office of the DA actually does The role of the DA in criminal prosecutions, from the crime being committed all the way to sentencing Some typical situations that DAs might face and why some opt for incarceration How we can hold our DAs accountable when it comes to mass incarceration vs. restorative justice, especially in non-election years  
28 minutes | Mar 14, 2023
210: On Running for Office, with Trinidad Rodriguez
As this is an episode that’s a little bit different from our other episodes (I don’t think to date we’ve interviewed a person who’s currently running for office), we’d like to make sure we are very clear about the following:  We are NOT endorsing any candidates in this episode.  We are grateful that Trinidad Rodriguez, who is running for Mayor of Denver, was willing to connect with us to give us an inside look at what it’s like running for office, to expand on our civics engagement series.  Again, we are NOT endorsing any candidates in this episode.   This episode was also unique in that we got an inside look into what a political campaign looks like, marrying the personal “why” (why we care about certain issues, for example, due to lived experience) with our own individual and collective abilities to make change in the world.   It was also very humanizing about a process that we previously thought was elevated above us, inaccessibly locked away in a black box.  That’s not true.  Any one of us, with enough experience, support, drive, internal strength, and vision, can run for office.  And as you listen, we hope you find your own takeaway - not only about running for civic office but about the power you DO have to make change and shape your own communities on a daily basis.   What to listen for:  Trini’s thoughts on what it takes to actually run for office, and what / who you need to surround yourself with The importance of breaking out of our silos, and asking those affected what they think will be most helpful to them Advice on what we can all do to be more engaged – that is, follow up on our votes.  Know the outcomes of what you voted on, and hold leaders and politicians accountable to implement the policies that were decided upon by the citizens, with integrity. About Trini: Trinidad Rodriguez is bringing a new approach to moving Denver forward. Growing up with a single mom in West Denver, his family had to overcome some challenges like housing insecurity, mental health and addiction issues, and violent crime. The city and its services supported them through the hard times, and that inspired Trinidad to pay it forward and continue to fight for Denver.   Trinidad has spent the last 23 years working in finance and volunteering with various local civic and nonprofit organizations like the Downtown Denver Partnership, Denver Housing Authority, Blueprint Denver, Rose Community Foundation, Metropolitan State University of Denver Foundation, and Urban Peak. He is a public finance expert who knows how to leverage and build public and private networks to create public-serving infrastructure. He has financed schools, affordable housing communities, and health clinics that have served tens of thousands of Denverites. This sets him apart from the other candidates.   Now he’s running for mayor to make sure that Denver is a city where every Denverite can achieve their version of success, regardless of the neighborhood they’re in. He is a proven leader with bold plans to address Denver’s biggest issues. Trini understands that we can’t expect different results if we continue to try the same approaches.   More details about his background and experience can be found here.
41 minutes | Mar 7, 2023
209: It’s 2023, and the Police Still Don’t Care About Black People
When we first released this episode, it was roughly two months after George Floyd had been murdered by the police and it was perhaps the first time that non-Black Americans, and in particular, White Americans, realized that this police violence wasn’t isolated to a few communities, but indeed was a national problem.   And now we’re sitting here, a month after Tyre Nichols was murdered by the police, and thought it was important to revisit this topic based on the discussions that we’ve been hearing, and reading, on the topic of police.  We’re now 2.5 years away from this original recording - how have your own thoughts on the police changed since that point?   In the end: the history of policing in our country is America’s history. If we don’t understand this history, we won’t be able to keep ALL of our communities safe in the future.   What to listen for: The colonial form of policing, and how informal it was at the very beginning. Who funded the police force in 19th century America - and what they wanted the police to focus on protecting? Hint: motivations split between Northern and Southern lines. How the structure and funding of the police had to change as cities, and the country, grew, and yet how they served to reinforce hierarchies in society. Given this, what do YOU think? Can an organization with roots like this be race-blind in its policies and actions? If not, what would it take to change? We offer some personal histories as we reflect on policing, and how ordinary people can make a difference. Relevant episodes: If you want more, we mention this episode of NPR’s THROUGHLINE a lot here.  
38 minutes | Feb 28, 2023
208: Negro League Baseball and MLB Today
If you’re listening to this episode around the time when it’s being released, then you’ll be listening to this right on the last day of Black History Month here in the United States. It should go without saying that Black History is American History, but we’re going to say it anyway, and that it shouldn’t be confined just to the shortest month of the year but instead should be taught to our kids every day of the year, and should be talked about by us as grownups by an equal amount. That said, it’s important also to not just be teaching our kids about the parts of Black history that are full of struggle, and in particular we’re referring to the history of slavery and the Civil Rights Movement, which is even being called into question in states like Florida currently.   That’s exactly why we’re bringing you this episode today - where we talk about the the Negro Leagues and the history behind America’s favorite pastime - baseball - that you might not know, and probably weren’t taught in schools - in a way that Misasha’s been talking about this in schools. That’s all to say: you can talk about this with kindergarteners. You can use the materials with older kids as well. But the important takeaway here? Black history is more than just slavery and the struggle to be free. It’s about the everyday moments, the history that encompasses all of us.  If we’re not teaching our kids to see Black people in these moments, then we’re really not teaching them to see Black people at all. So - let’s get into the Negro Leagues, as pitchers and catchers are reporting right now for spring training in Major League Baseball.   What to listen for: The separate (and decidedly not equal) conditions under which Black and White ballplayers had to play Names of some Black superstar baseball players who – if/when integrated into the Hall of Fame – would be as good or better than some of the MLB athletes we celebrate today How to talk with your kids, from kindergarten through high school, about this specific period of baseball in American history Resources:  Episode 50, Why Aren’t Black Kids Playing Baseball?   Visit the Negro Leagues Baseball Museum Society for AMerican Baseball Research – statistics We Are The Ship: The Story of Negro League Baseball A Negro League Scrapbook Mamie On The Mound Who Were The Negro Leagues? Undeniable: Negro League Women Undeniable: International Impact Undeniable: Jackie and Monte  
35 minutes | Feb 21, 2023
207: Civics 103 - All About Our Local Government
If you’ve been following us on our journey through (third grade) civics, you’ll know that we’ve covered the federal government/civics on a national level in our Civics 101 episode, which was Episode 203, and then focused on state government in Civics 102, which was Episode 205. We’re now here to round out our basic civics knowledge with Civics 103 - everything - and more, if we’re being honest - that you wanted to know about your local city/county/municipal governments. Let’s jump right into this.   What to listen for: Different structures of local government - like city managers vs strong mayors (which one are you living in!?) - that you can vote for or see appointed All the other roles that make our daily lives happen - from sheriffs and police and fire to coroners, parks and rec, economic development, public works, planning, and more Ways that we discovered we can get more involved in our local governments - and what YOU can do too!  
53 minutes | Feb 14, 2023
206: How Being Anti-History Hurts All Of Us
When people think of the government or they think about elections, they often think about presidential elections, and big federal government. But more often than not, our daily lives are hugely impacted by the decisions made by our state and local governments - and this impacts one very high-profile area in particular. Our children, in our schools. In the news recently was the headline that Governor Ron DeSantis of Florida was banning the Advanced Placement high school course on African American studies - which, incidentally, is the same curriculum that is taught in ALL 50 STATES, because it violated state law and “lacks educational value.”  They were worried about sections on “Intersectionality and Activism,” “Black Feminist Literary Theory” “Black Queer Studies” and Critical Race Theory (which, incidentally, was in the accusations but the theory itself was not going to be taught in the class b/c it’s a college graduate level course that would be too difficult for high school students even in a college-level course - we did a whole episode on this, in case you’re wondering what is the DEAL with CRT?).   What laws are we talking about?  A new one that requires lessons on race be taught in “an objective manner” and “not used to indoctrinate or persuade students to a particular point of view” - and ones that have been banning books and discussions about gender and sexuality in the classroom in Florida in the name of “parents rights”.  All of this has been having a chilling effect on the 2.8 million students in the classrooms who are no longer really learning about the full scope of American history, nor are they able to discuss their own gender or sexuality, that of their family, their friends, nor the history of queer folks in America.   Keep in mind, though, AP courses on European history have not been scrutinized by the DeSantis administration. Wonder why….   So yeah.  We’re on our civics kick, and we are bringing you back to the discussion we had in April 2022 on banned books, the role that school boards and states have in banned books, curriculum, and so much more. This is the year of doing - so get out there, and make your voice heard.  What to listen for:  What IS critical race theory, actually?   How CRT been misused to discuss culturally relevant teaching We think anti-CRT should just be called anti-history  The (frightening) increase in book bans recently - even when polls are showing the majority of American voters and parents are opposed to book bans What you can do right now to get loud The petition we mentioned:  https://naacp.org/actions/demand-educational-freedom-florida
31 minutes | Feb 7, 2023
205: Civics 102: What Do State Governments Do?
We’re back in our Intro to Civics course!  You know, the one you probably took in third grade and maybe, if you were lucky, in some form in middle and high school and didn’t pay enough attention to?  Or maybe you never took it, if you live in the 60% of states that don’t require students to take a civics exam as a graduation requirement - which is something we learned about in Episode 203, “I’m Just A Bill,” where we focused on the federal level.  This episode, is going to focus on the states, get a little deeper into what our own local officials are doing, and how we can all get more involved in our own governance. You're probably with us in being sick and tired of feeling like we can’t make a difference or make positive change.  SO get ready - we think you’ll be blown away when you learn how much local politics affect us on a daily basis.  What to listen for:  All about the 10th Amendment, which is the one that gives states So Much Power separate from the federal government The mandates and grants and structures that give the government the funding to work How you can interact with the state government - even by streaming committee meetings in your living room! - because they shape your communities through schools, taxes, policing, and more. https://ballotpedia.org/Comparison_of_state_legislative_salaries https://votesmart.org/education/states https://static.votesmart.org/static/pdf/govtable.pdf https://leg.colorado.gov/content/citizens-guide-effective-legislative-participation
28 minutes | Jan 31, 2023
204: Monterey Park, Baton Rouge, Half Moon Bay, and What We all Should Be Doing Now
This is not the episode we wanted to record this week - but it’s the one that we NEEDED to record this week.  Why?  Because just as we’re venturing down the rabbit hole of topics over the next few months that is Civic Engagement and making a difference for 2024, we had blatant scary fearful reminders about why we want you all to know and do more - because people’s lives are at stake. If you want to know how we feel about the latest mass shootings targeting Asian folks and Black folks, why we don’t give a shit that it was an Asian shooter, how to think about hate crimes, and what the larger issues are and what things are that we can each actually DO - listen in. What to listen for:  Our personal reactions and feelings to the horrible mass shootings over the weekend - because they hit close to home What we can do going forward to see the big picture, which centers our communities Specific issues to act on, including gun control, hate crimes, and domestic violence
48 minutes | Jan 24, 2023
203: I’m Just A Bill… (Civics 101)
I’m just a bill, on Capitol Hill… do you remember that song, from Schoolhouse Rock? If that jogs your memory, this is the episode for you. If you’re too young to remember that song, this episode is for you. If you hate that song, this episode is for you.  Why? Because this episode is about civics - in other words, how our government functions. We’re at a pretty critical time in our country’s history.  With all of what’s been in the news, through the disastrous Speaker of the House election in the House of Representatives, and in the discussions we’ve had, and will have, about Supreme Court decisions, and how where we are right now in 2023 is basically setting the stage for the crucial Presidential election of 2024 - this is a topic that we probably all should know a lot more about. Because right now, we don’t.  What to listen for:  The current state of civic education in the US What the three branches of government are, and how each of them work A perspective on the recent Speaker of the House (of Representatives) election - one which went 15 rounds, for the first time in one hundred years Details like the difference between judges and justices, how long Senators and Representatives are in office for, and how a bill becomes a law What YOU can do to be an engaged citizen  Resources to read for more information:  Find your senators: https://www.senate.gov/senators/senators-contact.htm Find your representatives: https://www.house.gov/representatives/find-your-representative More specifics on the data we quoted in the episode:  https://kids-clerk.house.gov/grade-school/lesson.html https://constitutioncenter.org/blog/the-speaker-of-the-house-and-the-constitution https://www.pbs.org/newshour/politics/how-the-speaker-of-the-house-gets-picked https://constitution.congress.gov/constitution/amendment-10/ https://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/document/questions-and-answers/100q.pdf https://www.congress.gov/bill/117th-congress/house-bill/5288/text https://www.congress.gov/bill/117th-congress/senate-bill/879/text
39 minutes | Jan 17, 2023
202: Kate Schatz & A White Woman’s Work
We promised to bring you more conversation about civics and engagement - and today we get to bring you a “real talk” episode about one of our favorite topics - civics, engagement, and a White Woman’s Work.  Plus, as a special bonus, we do this in conversation with NYT Bestselling Author Kate Schatz - a queer white woman - who is basically the perfect human being to tackle these topics with.   We talk about what she’d say to white women if she could say absolutely anything, the interconnectedness of oppression while avoiding devolving into the Oppression Olympics, how to figure out what to ask fellow white people about racism instead of asking people of color,  How white women can channel a little more bravery once they know what’s really at risk - which is tied into the mic drop moment when she references Trevor Noah - and really importantly, the folks and civic organizations who are actually making huge differences that we can each get behind. Consider this your “DWW ease in” to our civics focus, but any way you think of this, you should listen, and then get all of your friends to do the same, as we kick off 2023. What to listen for:  How forces of oppression are linked - with a reality check about the importance of checking intersectionality and privilege in these conversations  Hear why White people need to talk amongst themselves about these topics - and how they might think about approaching their Black friends differently The mic-drop moment when Kate puts her views on White women into context about Trevor Noah’s TV farewell thanking black women, who can’t afford to f*ck around and find out … it’s really just social capital that’s at risk for White women, so can’t we get you to do more?! Organizations like the WNBA who’ve made a difference, along with Black Voters Matter, the New Georgia Project, Fair Fight - who we should support all year ‘round and not just before elections About Kate:  KATE SCHATZ is a feminist author, activist, public speaker, and educator. She's the New York Times-bestselling author of the "Rad Women" book series; the 33 ⅓ book Rid of Me: A Story; and Do the Work: An Anti-Racist Activity Book, co-written with “United Shades of America” host W. Kamau Bell.
40 minutes | Jan 10, 2023
201: Women’s Health (NOT reproductive health), with Elix founder Lulu Ge
One of our philosophies is that anti-racism work has to be done in a way that’s sustainable - meaning, just like we can’t post a black square to Instagram and say we’re done, we also can’t spread ourselves too thin or work ourselves to the point of irredeemable fatigue because then we also stop having impact.   So to kick off this year, we are bringing you a really open conversation on a topic we don’t as a society speak openly about Women’s health (which, for men, is often just called “health.”) In particular, we want you to know this conversation is specifically NOT reproductive health, which is often what women’s health is solely classified as, but rather all the things that happen with our bodies related to our hormones, periods, menopause, symptoms, and society’s lack of support.  To have this conversation in partnership, we bring you the founder of a groundbreaking, personalized, online Traditional Chinese Medicine company.   Because if we can work to support and balance ourselves from the root causes upwards, we will be able to be more vibrant impactful versions of ourselves.   ** SPECIAL SURPRISE FOR OUR LISTENERS ** Take 15% off a 3-month bundle of Cycle Balance using code DEARWHITEWOMEN15 at this site! What to listen for:  What symptoms many women actually experience every month due to their very natural, human menstrual cycle Current treatments available - you’d be surprised How women of color are impacted by periods What Traditional Chinese Medicine offers that’s different from Western medicine, and how Elix fits into this idea of personalized medicine About our guest:  Lulu created Elix in 2020 to destigmatize and normalize menstrual and hormonal health through an East meets West approach. A portmanteau of elixir and helix, Elix is the first digital platform to combine Traditional Chinese Medicine's (TCM) 5,000 years of wisdom with a proprietary algorithm to empower self-healing. The company formulates pure and potent liquid herbal extracts to treat hormonal imbalances at the root cause of painful and life-disrupting symptoms. By digitizing in-depth TCM health assessments and consults, Elix offers easy access to personalized herbal liquid formulas to heal holistically. After experiencing debilitating pain after getting off birth control, Lulu found her way back to TCM and was able to heal from within at the root cause. Recognizing a white space, Lulu launched Elix at the onset of the pandemic and so far, the company has raised $2.7m, grown 2700% with customers ages 16-52 from all 50 states and Canada (about half are WOC) -- clearly resonating with the community. With health autonomy, knowledge, and access under dire threat, Lulu is determined to help women with periods feel more empowered about and in control of their own health and well-being. I'd love to speak with you further about Lulu as a guest! She can speak about why WOC are chronically gaslit about their pain, the need to normalize period talk, and how the pandemic changed some periods among other topics.  
16 minutes | Jan 3, 2023
200: Big Plans for 2023
Welcome to Episode 200 of our podcast, and welcome to 2023! Akemashite omedetou gozaimasu! (Happy New Year!) In our first episode of this new year, we want to reintroduce ourselves, give you a run of where we’ve been with our platform, and make sure you have an overview of what you can expect from us this coming year. As we’re heading into yet another major election in 2024, if we want to build a community and country that actually looks out for ALL of us, there are things and people we need to know about so we can do things differently - and take action intentionally and consistently. What to listen for:  Who we are (Sara & Misasha), how we met (walking out of a racial identity conversation as undergrads at Harvard 25+ years ago), and why we have this platform (women have SO MUCH POWER to influence change, and White women, in particular, have voices that can be heard where other voices cannot)  The incredible success we have had, including a quarter of a million podcast downloads, thousands of copies of our book being sold, and being hired to speak at many organizations What we have planned for 2023 - including civics, SCOTUS cases, and all we think we need to do in, with, and for our communities to be ready for the 2024 elections
27 minutes | Dec 27, 2022
199: 2022 Year-End Recap
It’s that time of year when everyone starts to think about not only the end of this current year but also the beginning of the next. And friends, we’ve got some big plans for next year - but we’ll save that for EPISODE 200 (our next episode, and our first of 2023!). This episode will be a little bit of year-end reflection for us - and if these questions resonate with you, we hope you’ll spend a little time sitting with this year, before moving on to the next. Questions we talk about including:  What was the hardest thing you said to someone? What is different about you from this time last year? What internal challenge has taught you the most about yourself? How did you align your behavior with your values?
51 minutes | Dec 20, 2022
198: Everything Adoption - And We Mean EVERYTHING - with Patrick Armstrong
This was a conversation that made us lose track of time.  Because even if the core conversation about transracial adoption doesn’t capture your attention - which it should because nearly 30% of kids who are adopted are adopted across borders or across cultures or race - the trajectory this conversation takes into why adoption should NOT be positioned as a solution to abortion absolutely is a perspective you don’t want to miss - along with all the other nuggets of wisdom around identity and belonging as well. Thrilled to be bringing you insights from Patrick Armstrong, someone we don’t just know from the virtual airwaves but now, thanks to some great opportunities to speak together, in real life too. And if you want to hear more about his journey as not only an adoptee, but as an outspoken advocate for adoptees and, due to his lived experience, transracial adoptees in particular, you’re going to want to listen all the way to the end, and then follow him on every platform out there. What to listen for:  The moment that Patrick - a transracial adoptee from Korea, raised in a White family - realized that he wanted to explore his Asian identity.  Hat tip, Always Be My Maybe. How transracial adoption shaped Patrick’s identity and influenced his sense of belonging That adoption currently centers the child - and the importance of considering the adults, and how broken the systems are that lead to families being torn apart  Thoughts on positioning adoption as the alternative to abortion.  Hint: It’s not. About Patrick:   Patrick Armstrong (he/him) is a transracial Korean American adoptee, podcaster, speaker, and advocate. He is one of the co-hosts of the Janchi Show, a podcast that explores and celebrates the experiences and stories of Korean adoptees everywhere. He helped start the Asian Adoptees of Indiana, a group dedicated to creating a safe, engaging community for all Asian adoptees who need it. He is currently based in Indianapolis. Contact: Website Instagram: @patrickintheworld TikTok: @patrickintheworld LinkedIn
41 minutes | Dec 13, 2022
197: Being Both Very Asian and American, with Michelle Li
It’s December, the time of year when it seems like regardless of whether you celebrate Christmas or Hannukkah or Kwanzaa or anything else or nothing at all, our schedules get busy. And lots of times, this busyness centers around food, be it potluck gatherings at work, holiday parties, big family dinners, or even coffee and treats with friends - because food brings us together as human beings better than almost anything else. But what happens when the foods you have are scoffed at by the folks around you? How does it feel to be made to feel “different” from the other Americans around you based on your cultural heritage? How do you get kids to try new flavors and learn real history, let’s be honest, at this stage in the melting pot game, what makes something American, anyway? We’re here to talk about all that and more with an award-winning veteran journalist Michelle Li - who also created the Very Asian Foundation after a super shocking (now viral) viewer comment in response to her comment about dumplings on television. What to listen for:  The viral video after a voicemail from a White woman that inspired the launch of the Very Asian Foundation “I won’t let you yuck someone else’s yum” - and the importance of food in identity The role that books play - there’s a huge book recommendation list! - in helping folks connect with their identity and the shared history we experience About Michelle:  Michelle Li is an award-winning, veteran journalist who co-launched The Very Asian Foundation in January 2022 alongside friend and fellow journalist Gia Vang. Her response to a racist voicemail became a global movement of unity and caught the attention of The Ellen Show. Ellen’s monetary gift of $15,000 helped start the seed money to create a nonprofit focused on shining a light on Asian experiences through advocacy and celebration.  Michelle spent many years supporting adoptees through heritage camps and volunteer tours to Korea. She also launched a program to support Missouri children in foster care. All of this led to a congressional award in 2010. Michelle’s journalistic work has been honored with a national Peabody Award, several national Murrows, and multiple regional Emmys– often dealing with race or gender inequities. Michelle has appeared on CNN, NBC, CBS, ABC, and The Washington Post. Michelle currently resides in St. Louis with her family. She is @michellelitv on most platforms. A Very Asian Guide to Korean Food is her first children's book.  
19 minutes | Dec 6, 2022
196: Here’s HOW to Have Those Uncomfortable Holiday Conversations
We’ve been asked a lot about how to have uncomfortable conversations lately - namely, the reality that, yikes, my people are coming over for the holidays and how on earth do I handle it when those uncomfortable, racist, inappropriate comments and jokes come up? (Because let’s be real - they’re coming up.) While there is no official checklist for success, we DO have quite a number of tips to help guide you and your group into more meaningful, engaging conversations around your holiday table. If you know our podcast, you know we’re all about action, so we’re re-airing this episode that’s quickly becoming a favorite one for many of our listeners in order to share some of the tips that have worked for us - in order not to avoid these conversations, but to have them in a way that’s authentic, honest, and safe for all of us. We’d love to hear what’s worked for you too, as you navigate whatever uncomfortable conversations might be coming your way - please drop us a line at hello at dearwhitewomen.com and we might share what’s worked for you on our social! What to listen for:  Tips for before, during, and after your holiday gatherings A selection of these tips include: knowing yourself and your why,  setting healthy boundaries,  using our favorite question “what do you mean by that?”  using “I statements,”  questions you can use to reflect on what worked / didn’t work after the event. You’ll want to listen to the short episode to get the whole range of how to use these tips and more!
21 minutes | Nov 29, 2022
195: Why Survivors Need Financial Support, with FinAbility’s Stacy Sawin
For those of you who have been listening to Dear White Women from the beginning, or for those listeners who just joined us (welcome!), you probably understand that this whole platform comes from our own deeply personal connections not only to this work but to the world that we’d like to see in the future, as we find that it’s often that personal connection that leads to intentional, lasting change. That’s why we loved speaking with today’s guest, Stacy Sawin, who comes to us with her own deeply personal story as to why she created FinAbility, an organization that is changing and enhancing security for so many survivors of domestic abuse – especially from a financial perspective. A huge percentage of survivors are experiencing financial abuse along with other forms of harm, so even if her story has nothing to do with your own lived experiences, it’s likely that someone you know can relate - so please listen, share, and, if you’re listening to this on the day it comes out, financially support on this Giving Tuesday, if you’re able. What to listen for:  The way that Stacy’s personal experience as a survivor of stalking shaped the founding of Finability How race plays a factor in survivors’ financial access 95% of survivors won’t use formalized support systems such as crisis hotlines,  direct service providers, or professional advocates; instead, they're turning to Google…  New languaging → harm-doers (as opposed to abusers) What each one of us can do to better support survivors after they share their stories with us - believe and validate About Stacy:  Stacy Sawin is the co-founder and CEO of FinAbility, a 501c3 nonprofit that financially empowers survivors of domestic abuse. As a stalking survivor, she has experienced firsthand what it feels like to be scared for your life and is dedicated to ensuring everyone has the financial security needed to live free from abuse and thrive.  Prior to launching FinAbility, Stacy earned an MBA from London Business School and worked as a technology consultant at Deloitte. Stacy is also an avid long-distance hiker and fosters dogs with Oregon Dog Rescue.
33 minutes | Nov 22, 2022
194: The Prosp(a)rity Project, with Briana Franklin
For a lot of the second half of this year, student debt relief and the student loan crisis have been in national news - and there have been a LOT of feelings about it, ranging from joy and happiness that some of this extreme burden to repay what often can amount to predatory lending practices has now been lifted to the other extreme, which amounts to a lot of “well, I repaid my debt. Why should others be getting a handout?” (If you know us, you know where we fall on that scale.) But there’s so much more to this story than the question of handouts versus the student debt crisis, because, much like so many other things in the United States, student debt and student loans have also been affected by systemic racism. This is why we’re so thrilled to have Briana Franklin as our guest today, to talk about how and why student loan debt disproportionately affects Black women, her own experience with this as a Dartmouth graduate, and why she decided to do something about this - in a big way. What to listen for:  How handling student debt is like “draining the ocean with a teaspoon” - and the inspiration behind Bri’s founding of the Priosp(a)rity Project The ways in which student loan debt disproportionately affects Black women, not just financially, but in a holistic life way too Huge successes and surprises that the organization has been celebrating What’s next for 2023 - and how you can get involved About Briana: Founder, President, & CEO of Finability.      Briana "Bri" Franklin is a businesswoman, philanthropist, and student debt expert/thought leader with a passion for the socioeconomic and holistic empowerment of Black girls and women. Having taken on a financial burden that eventually ballooned to nearly $120K in student debt through her undergraduate studies at Dartmouth College, Bri developed an acute appreciation for the challenges many student debt holders experience, including diminished ability to establish financial independence, take advantage of personal freedoms, such as starting a family/home buying, launch business ventures as well as creditworthiness. In recognizing the extent to which other Black women in particular experience adversity at the hands of the $1.7T student debt crisis as well as lack of financial literacy, she formed The Prosp(a)rity Project as a solution for eradicating these systemic barriers. Her work has been profiled in outlets such as Forbes, Buzzfeed, Authority Magazine, and Thrive Global, attracted support from audiences worldwide, and achieved numerous milestones.  
28 minutes | Nov 15, 2022
193: 100 Diverse Voices on Parenthood, with Jelani Memory
Hey, so remember how last week we were talking about how we have hope?  This is another conversation and way of thinking that gives me hope - in particular for anybody who knows children, knows new parents, or thinks they might eventually know folks who might want to stop reading the outdated encyclopedia that we call What to Expect when you’re Expecting and flip over to a more contemporary, inclusive, humane book to learn about parenting.   Misasha got the opportunity to speak with Jelani Memory recently on their Better Grownups podcast and we’re thrilled to bring him back to discuss the company’s newest venture - 100 Diverse Voices on Parenthood.   What to listen for:  The many powerful ways this new parenting book - 100 Diverse Voices on Parenthood - stands out from the books currently on the market What it took to produce A Kids Co book written by so many people, for adults, compared to the single-author kid books they’ve published so far How Jelani hopes that all parents - White parents included - know that this book is for them, to give the proverbial microphone to a wide range of people who are experts in their own experiences and have the knowledge to share with all of us. The exciting next steps for A Kids Co!  About Jelani: Jelani Memory (he/him) is a constantly curious writer, entrepreneur, and storyteller. He's the Founder of A Kids Co. a bold new kind of media company that strives to empower a generation of kids through diverse storytelling.  He's the author of A Kids Book About Racism and A Little Book About Fear.  He was previously co-founder of Circle Media Inc. He currently lives in his hometown of Portland, Oregon, with his wife and 6 kids.  
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