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Creating a Family: Talk about Adoption & Foster Care

96 Episodes

64 minutes | 3 days ago
Evaluating Risk Factors in Foster Care
We talk about evaluating the risk factors for foster care with Dr. Kimara Gustafson, an Assistant Professor in the Department of Pediatrics at the University of Minnesota with appointments at both their Adoption Medicine Clinic and Pediatric Emergency Department.In this episode, we cover:The common risk factor that foster parents and those wanting to adopt from foster care need to be aware of include physical, emotional, developmental, educational, and behavioral problems rooted in childhood adversity and trauma.What types of trauma are foster kids exposed to? Neglect, abuse, prenatal exposure, multiple caregivers, not having a reliable caregiver, constant stress What percentage of children in foster care have been exposed to drugs or alcohol prenatally? Impact of trauma on physical health.  Foster parents often have little information about prior health history. Overmedication of foster children and youth. Research has found that the average number of psychiatric diagnoses and psychotropic medications prescribed were significantly greater for youth and children in foster care. o Children in foster care are likely to be kept on them longer than other Medicaid-enrolled children who are not in foster care. What are psychotropic drugs and why are so many foster children on them? Who has authority to make health care decisions for foster children and youth? Impact of trauma on mental health. hyperactivity, inattention, and impulsivity.  What types of behaviors are common as a result of trauma? Sleep issues common to children in foster care. Food issues common to children in foster care. Creating a Family course: Practical Solutions to Typical Food Issues  Impact of trauma on a foster child’s education. Children in foster care need educational advocates. Risk factors to consider for children already in the home. Creating a Family course: The Impact of Fostering on Children Already in the Home  Children can heal and foster parents can and do make a difference! This podcast is produced  by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them. Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:·         Weekly podcasts·         Weekly articles/blog posts·        Resource pages on all aspects of family buildingCreating a Family also has an active presence on many social media platforms. Please like or follow us on Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, Pinterest, and Instagram. Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
63 minutes | 10 days ago
Maintaining Your Marriage & Relationships When Adopting or Fostering
We don’t just bring kids into our homes; we bring them into our marriage and relationships. And marriages or relationships are particularly challenged when we are parenting kids who have been exposed to trauma. We talk with Amy Garber, MSW and LICSW, the Manager of the Post Adoption Program with Wide Horizons for Children, a child welfare organization. We also talk with Anne Meijers, a licensed clinical social worker, specializing in adult and couples therapy.In this episode, we cover:Our goal should be for our marriage or relationships to be around long after the kids leave home. This takes being proactive because if we’re not careful our relationship becomes all about parenting or fostering.How can kids enhance a marriage or relationship? We know that kids who’ve experience trauma can be challenging to parent and can test a marriage or a relationship.Why are children adopted or fostered past infancy, children with prenatal exposure, and kids who have experienced trauma often harder to parent? CreatingaFamily.org has many courses on Trauma Informed Parenting.What are some of the stresses that relationships may face when fostering or adopting kids who’ve been exposed to trauma? Feeling isolatedOne parent wanting to adopt or foster more than the other Blame from the outside or between the parentsGrief- that parenting is harder or less fun than you anticipated, etc.What are some situations that children who’ve experienced trauma can bring to the family and be particularly difficult for the marriage?Disagreement on how to handle behaviorsTriangulationWhat are some signs that you are neglecting your marriage?How can trauma or neglect in the parent’s background impact the marriage once children arrive?How to handle extended family members (grandparents, etc.) that are negatively impacting your relationship?Tips for strengthening your relationship while parenting kids who’ve been exposed to trauma, including prenatal exposure.Special issues for single parents.We encourage single parents to establish a support network. How can challenging kids test this network? How can single parents find support?Tips for singles to strengthen their support network and relationships. This podcast is produced  by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them. Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:·         Weekly podcasts ·         Weekly articles/blog posts ·        Resource pages on all aspects of family building Creating a Family also has an active presence on many social media platforms. Please like or follow us on Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, Pinterest, and Instagram. Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
69 minutes | 17 days ago
Transitioning Home as a Newly Adoptive Family
What should you expect as you return home with a newly adopted baby or child? What are the common emotions? We talk with Laura Jean Beauvais, a licensed professional counselor and mother of two adult daughters through adoption. She has conducted domestic, foster, and international adoptions for more than 25 years.In this episode, we cover:Adopting a NewbornWhat are some common emotions when adopting a newborn?What are some common stresses when adopting a newborn?How may the revocation period affect the transition to new adoptive parenting?Expectations of extended family during this transition period.How do the stresses of newly adopted families differ from a family that gives birth to their child?How does the pre-adoption process affect this transition to new parenthood?What are some feelings that come up about birth parents after the baby comes home? Realities of open adoptions Handling grief of birth family Feeling like the presence of a birth mom makes the adoptive mom less of a “real” mom The balance of power shifting from the expectant/birth mom to the adoptive mom How much of your child’s “story” should you share?How can infertility struggles impact the transition period?Adopting a Child Past InfancyWhat are some common emotions when adopting a child from foster care or through international adoption?What are some common stresses when adopting a child past infancy?The challenge of setting realistic expectations.How to help your child and you settle in to becoming a new family.Post Adoption DepressionWhat is post-adoption depression?What are the symptoms?How common is post-adoption depression?Can fathers also have post-adoption depression?Who is at risk for post-adoption depression? Are there ways to predict which people are more prone to post-adoption depression?How can post-adoption depression impact parenting?What are some steps to take to prevent post-adoption depression?What should you do if you think you are suffering from post-adoption depression?Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
68 minutes | 24 days ago
What to Eat to Increase Your Odds of Success with IVF
What foods and supplements help improve fertility for those trying to conceive naturally and for those undergoing fertility treatment. We talked with Dr. Jorge E. Chavarro, Associate Professor of Nutrition and Epidemiology at the Harvard School of Public Health and Medicine at Harvard Medical School. Dr. Chavarro’s research is focused on understanding how nutrition and lifestyle impact human reproduction. He is the Principal Investigator of the Nurses’ Health Study 3 – an ongoing prospective cohort of young professional women started in 2010 designed to investigate the role of lifestyle and biologic factors on women’s health – and leads the nutritional component of the EARTH Study, an ongoing prospective cohort of couples undergoing infertility treatment at the Massachusetts General Hospital.In this episode, we cover:How Does Nutrition Impact FertilityWe know that women are born with all the eggs they are ever going to have so how does nutrition impact female fertility and egg quality?How does nutrition impact male fertility?How does weight and BMI affect fertility?We know that the microbiome in our reproductive tract is important to fertility. Does what we eat impact this microbiome?What Foods and Diet are Best for Enhancing FertilityWhat foods improve natural fertility or the fertility of those in fertility treatment?What is the importance of protein? What type of protein is bestRole of carbohydrates in fertility. Low carb? Complex vs simple carbs?CaffeineSoy productsWhat Supplements are Effective at Improving FertilityWhat supplements should you take if you are trying to conceive with or without fertility treatment?Prenatal vitaminMicronutrient supplementationFolatesCoQ 10Vitamin B12DHEA (dehydroepiandrosterone)Vitamin DFish OilSupport the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
61 minutes | a month ago
Healing After Abuse and Neglect
Children adopted from foster care or from abroad have often experienced abuse, neglect, or trauma. These children require a different form of parenting.  This is a re-air of an older interview we did with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, author of The Connected Child: Bring Hope and Healing to Your Adoptive Family, and the founder and Director of the TCU Institute of Child Development, about how to help children from hard places heal.  In this episode, we cover:Why is parenting abused children different from traditional parenting?What are the 3 most important things you should do during the first 6 months home with a newly adopted child?How can we discipline our children while still remaining connected and create attachment?How can we help a child who has tantrums whenever he hears the word “no,” or is told he can’t do something?How long should parents stay home (if possible) after adoption?How can parents be proactive with children who have experienced abuse and neglect in order to help them and to improve behavior?Parenting kids adopted from foster care and internationally can be hard on the marriage and especially when one of the parents is the one getting educated on the type of parenting these kids need and the other one has not “bought into” it yet. How to help both parents get on the same page.How should parents handle criticism (implied or direct) about their parenting style when they are trying to follow the empower to connect style?What are some practical tools for encouraging attachment?Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
55 minutes | a month ago
Adopting a Child from Another State
How do you find and adopt a baby or child in another state and what is the Interstate Compact for the Placement of Children (ICPC)? We talk with Chantilly Wijayasinha, MSW and MPH and Interim Director of Adoptions and Foster Care at Vista Del Mar Child & Family Services; and Jim Thompson, adoption, foster care, and assisted reproduction attorney at the Thompson Dove Law Group, and a Fellow at Academy of Adoption & Assisted Reproduction Attorneys.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
32 minutes | a month ago
Impact of COVID-19 on Surrogacy
How is the COVID-19 pandemic impacting those people who are trying to create their family through surrogacy —both those seeking surrogates in the US and those going abroad. We talk with Dr. Barry Witt, the Medical Director of WINFertility and Greenwich Fertility.In this episode, we cover:How is surrogacy practiced in the US?What is the distinction between gestational surrogate and a traditional surrogate?Is it possible to go abroad to find a surrogate?Why do people go abroad?What are the most popular countries for people to go to for surrogacy? (including the US)How has COVID-19 impacted intended parents seeking surrogates in the US?How has COVID-19 impacted people seeking surrogates in another country, including those coming to the US?Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
72 minutes | 2 months ago
Legal Process of Domestic Adoption: What You Need to Know Before You Adopt
Do you know how the legal process of adoption works? How do you get an original birth certificate? How do you get a social security number for your adopted child? We talk with Brinton Wright, an adoption attorney and Fellow in the Academy of Adoption & Assisted Reproduction Attorneys about the legal and social implications of adoption.In this episode, we cover:Different types of adoption.The difference between voluntary and involuntary termination of parental rights.What is meant by a "legal risk" adoption.What is meant by open adoption.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
61 minutes | 2 months ago
Coping with the Stress of Infertility
We talk about Coping with the Stress of Infertility with Dr. Tonya Wood, a clinical psychologist specializing in family planning,  pregnancy loss and infertility. She is the Director of Clinical Training at Pepperdine University and is 2020 President of the California Psychological Association.In this episode, we cover:Why is infertility so stressful?What are the losses women experience when they realize that either they or their partner is infertile?What are the losses men experience when either they or their partner is infertile?Why do some patients feel shame or guilt surrounding their infertility?What is ambiguous loss and why is that type of loss more stressful?How can infertility impact marriages and partnerships?How do men and women deal with the stress of infertility in different ways?What are healthy techniques to deal with the stress of infertility?Importance of not postponing life while in infertility treatment.Should patients share that they are infertile with others?What are some of the cultural, racial, and religious differences in how people experience infertility stress? What are the differences in how they cope with the losses and grief of infertility?Are there specific triggers or times of year that are more stressful for many people?What can clinics and medical professionals do to help patients cope with the stress of infertility?What aspects of the clinic experience or treatment experience contributes to the stress of infertility?How to find a therapist that specializes in infertility?Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
49 minutes | 2 months ago
Talking with Your Adopted or Foster Child about the Hard Parts of Their Story
Talking with your adopted or foster child about the hard parts of their story can feel like a daunting task.  Should you tell your child that her birth father is in jail or that her birth mother is addicted to drugs, or that she was conceived by rape? If so, how in the world do you share this news. We talk with Lesli Johnson, an EMDR therapist who specializes in adoption and foster care and an adult adoptee; and Susan Myers, a licensed Master Social Worker with Adoptions from the Heart Adoption Agency with offices throughout the northeast.In this episode, we cover:1.     Adopted and foster children often come to us with hard back stories: his birth parents are in jail, her birth mother used drugs or drank alcohol when she was pregnant, he was conceived via rape, siblings were kept by first family, it’s not known where siblings are, her first mother abused him, his birth father abused his mother, her first parents are addicted to drugs or alcohol, …2.     Should you tell your child these difficult parts of their history?3.     How should you tell your child these hard parts of their background?4.     How do you lay the groundwork with young children in order to fill in the details later?5.     By what age should you have shared all of your child’s story with him?6.     Give specific examples of how a conversation might go with a preschooler, and how would you fill in the gaps for a 6 year old, 10, 13 year old, etc.       a.     Child abuse       b.     Addiction       c.     Parent in jail7.     Can you use a lifebook to talk about rape, imprisonment, drug and alcohol addiction?8.     What is a lifebook and what should be included in a lifebook? 9.     How to use a lifebook when there is jail, rape, abuse, etc in the child’s story?10.  Specifically, how should parents tell their child that they were conceived during a rape?11.  Oversharing can happen with both parents and with children.12.  It’s tempting when your child is an infant to tell people private information. Why should foster and adoptive parents avoid this?13.  When might it be important to share some details of the child’s background?14.  How do you help your child understand how much of his story he should share with others outside the family?15.  How can adoptive parents help their children understand that they are more than the hard parts of their history and that they are not doomed to repeat their birth parents’ mistakes?Additional Resources:Telling the Truth to Your Adopted or Foster Child: Making Sense of the Past by Betsy Keefer  and Jayne E. SchoolerTalking with Children about Difficult History by Holly van Gulden  Lifebooks: Creating a Treasure for the Adopted Child (2nd Edition September 21, 2011)by Beth O'Malley M.EdSupport the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
38 minutes | 2 months ago
The Holidays with Adopted or Foster Kids Who’ve Been Exposed to Trauma
Does it feel like your adopted or foster child is sabotaging the holidays? Are there more tantrums, sullenness, and anxiety during the holiday season? In this episode, we explore why holidays are difficult for kids who have been exposed to trauma and what to do about it.  We talk with Rebeccca Robotham, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker at Beehive Counseling & Wellness in Connecticut. She is also an adoptee and former foster child.In this episode, we cover:There are many sources of trauma for children, and many adopted and foster children have experienced trauma before they come to our homes. Trauma can include neglect, prenatal exposure, abuse, domestic violence, and the actual act of being removed from your parents.How can trauma impact children both physically and emotionally?What is it about the holidays that makes it hard for kids with trauma? (change in routine, lots of people, bringing up memories, over-stimulation, change in diet, distracted parents, build up of anticipation, let down after the fact…)What type of behaviors might you see? (more tantrums, dysregulation, “sabotaging” the holidays, sibling bickering, depression, sullenness, anxiety, …)How can families do the holidays differently to help kids who have experienced trauma?Trauma in adoption and foster careAdoptive Parenting/Foster Parenting TipsSupport the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
57 minutes | 3 months ago
Collaborative Parenting
Is your child more challenging than most? Do typical parenting approaches not work? We talk about how to parent harder to parent kids with Dr. Ross Greene, the originator of the Collaborative & Proactive Solutions parenting model, a non-punitive, non-adversarial, trauma-informed model of care. Dr. Greene is a clinical psychologist, former Harvard professor, and the author The Explosive Child and Raising Human Beings.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
58 minutes | 3 months ago
Disrupting Birth Order in Adoption and Foster Care
Should you consider adopting or fostering a child that is older than a child already in your family. Are there things you can do to make it easier for all the children. We talk with Teresa Bernu, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker at Adoption Center of Illinois, and Mark Lacava, LCSW and Chief Clinical Officer at Spence Chapin Services to Family and Children an Adoption organization in NYC.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
54 minutes | 3 months ago
Parenting Tweens and Teens
Do you dread the teen years? Do you want to keep your kids little forever or go back to that sweet stage when they were still in footy pajamas? Listen to this fantastic interview with Dr. Ken Ginsburg to help you embrace the wonderful years between 11 and 20. Dr. Ginsburg is the Co-Founder and Director of Programs at the Center for Parent and Teen Communication and Professor of Pediatrics at Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia. He is the author of 5 award-winning books including: Building Resilience in Children and Teens: Giving Kids Roots and Wings.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
61 minutes | 3 months ago
7 Core Issues in Adoption and Foster Care
We talk about the 7 core issues in adoption and foster care with Allison Davis Maxon, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and co-author of Seven Core Issues in Adoption and Permanency: A Guide to Promoting Understanding and Healing in Adoption, Foster Care, Kinship Families and Third Party Reproduction.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
64 minutes | 4 months ago
Evaluating Risk Factors in International Adoption
Have you ever thought about international adoption. Are you terrified of having to decide what types of medical or emotional conditions you would accept. This is the show for you. We interview Dr. Judith Eckerle, Medical Director of the Adoption Medicine Clinic at the University of Minnesota to help demystify the common issues she sees in kids adopted from abroad. She is also an adult transracial international adoptee.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
52 minutes | 4 months ago
Male Infertility 101
What are the causes and treatment for male infertility? What lifestyle factors impact fertility in men? We talk with Dr. Natan Bar Chama, Director of the Center of Male Reproductive Health at RMA of New York and a board-certified Urologist and Male Infertility Specialist; and Dr. Eleanor Stevenson, a Professor and Chair of Division of Women, Children and Families at the Duke University School of Nursing where she focuses her scholarship on improving the emotional and informational needs of men experiencing infertility. She is the co-founder of All about Fertility, a website providing resources on male infertility.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
73 minutes | 4 months ago
Practical Tips for Disciplining While Maintaining Attachment
In this episode we talk about practical tips for disciplining while maintaining attachment with Amanda Purvis, a Training Specialist at the Karyn Purvis Center for Child Development, a social worker, and a mom of five.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
52 minutes | 4 months ago
Adoption Options: What Type of Adoption is Best For You
The world of adoption can be confusing. How do you adopt, what type of adoption is best, what is the cost, and how long does it take. Host Dawn Davenport, Executive Director of Creating a Family, the national adoption & foster care education and support nonprofit answers all of these questions and more.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
90 minutes | 4 months ago
How to Afford Adoption
What are some tried and true ways to afford adoption? We talk with Julie Gumm, author of “You Can Adopt Without Debt: Creative Ways to Cover the Cost of Adoption”.  In this episode we cover ways to find “extra” money that you can put towards your adoption, ideas for increasing your savings, and reasons to be cautious about asking for donations to pay for adoption.Support the show (https://creatingafamily.org/donation/)
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