Listen Now

The therapeutic relationship is built on trust, we come to therapy expecting that we are going to be heard and believed.Jeanine wasn't believed-- about her childhood sexual assaults, or the emerging psychotic symptoms, or her intractable suicidality....even after many near fatal attempts and over 40 inpatient stays.This episode looks at how and why we believe some people and discount others.  It turns out that the way people tell us their stories matters just as much as the actual words they choose. And, unfortunately, certain clinical presentations make patients/clients much less likely to be heard and believed. A heads up-- this episode includes descriptions of childhood sexual abuse, self-harm, and suicide attemptsDopamine, saliency, and the onset of paranoiahttps://www.nature.com/articles/s41398-020-00912-4Borderline personality diagnosis leads to demedicalization and poor treatmenthttps://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4870819/Inappropriate affecthttps://www.betterhelp.com/advice/personality-disorders/inappropriate-affect-symptoms-and-signs/Dr. H/BFTAhttps://www.craigheacockmd.com

Some things in life defy explanation...like tripping on mushrooms and arresting the plunge into alcoholism.Here Stella shares her story of childhood abuse and neglect, her reenactment of the abuse through toxic relationships with men, and then her life-changing sessions with both psilocybin and MDMA. Stella and Dr. H explore how she was able to first bring her dissociated and numbed self back to life with the help of psilocybin and later heal her attachment wounds and trauma with MDMA-assisted psychotherapy. BFTA and Dr. Hhttp://craigheacockmd.com

Dr. H sits down with Dr. David Puder, a psychiatrist and host of the Psychiatry and Psychotherapy podcast, to explore the beauty and challenge and mystery of psychotherapy.  What are Chris and Craig wanting for Christmas...??? How about writing us a review!Dr. Puder and the Psychiatry and Psychotherapy podcasthttps://www.psychiatrypodcast.comDr. H essay on psychedelic healing for CNN.comhttps://www.cnn.com/2020/12/20/opinions/psychedelics-trauma-healing-this-is-life-heacock/index.htmlBFTA and Dr. Hhttps://www.craigheacockmd.com

In most specialties of medicine, the dictum "Diagnosis guides treatment" is the law of the land. In psychiatry, however, most of what we treat are often overlapping syndromes, not actual diseases, and these syndromes involve hugely varying dimensions of symptoms with a vast array of potential causes and exacerbating factors.Maggie came to Dr. H with a challenging clinical presentation:  likely genetic loading for a mood and/or anxiety disorder, childhood emotional neglect, years of school problems, hormone irregularities and progesterone hypersensitivity, all leading to  steadily worsening mood instability, depression, and hopelessness.  Over the course of the last 12 years, Maggie and Dr. H were eventually able to co-create both a successful treatment course and a shame-free narrative, without a clear diagnosis to guide them.Comments, suggestions, questions? We'd love to hear them! Email us via https://www.craigheacockmd.com or message us on Twitter @bftapodIf you haven’t already, please write us a review!

The podcast Psychedelics Today recently released a two part interview with Will Hall, an author, podcaster, therapist, and voice of the anti-psychiatry community. This BFTA episode came about after Dr. H reached out to the hosts of PT and asked for a counterpoint to Will's complete dismissal of psychiatry as a meaningful part of the mental health treatment community. Here Dr. H  presents a more nuanced, balanced, and hopeful perspective, one that recognizes the harm that psychiatrists and other physicians have caused in the past and continue to cause today, while also asking that we try to lean into the positive, to identify and celebrate what works for people, to reject the black/white thinking that calls for tearing down systems which are, by their very nature, messy and imperfect, just as we humans are messy and imperfect. Psychedelics Todayhttps://psychedelicstoday.comDr. H and BFTAhttps://www.craigheacockmd.com

Dr. H sits down with his friend Brian, who watched his daughter, and then his wife, plunge into the depressive abyss.   This is the journey of a father and husband, of a "we can fix this" engineer trying to find a path through the ambiguity and uncertainty of psychiatric treatment.This is the second in an intermittent series of family members describing their journey of trying to support their loved ones through their darkest times.Grief and loss raft trips (mentioned by Brian)https://www.pathfindersforyou.orgDr. H/Back from the Abyss https://www.craigheacockmd.com

In this third of an intermittent series about therapists in the abyss, Dr. H sits down with his colleague  Dr. Elena Estanol, a Colorado-based psychologist, to explore Elena's "fourth dark night of the soul".  Her story serves as a springboard for exploring how to cope with the randomness of life,  learning to go inward to heal relational wounds, differentiating pain vs suffering, and finding peace with who shows up for us and who doesn't. Dr. Elena Estanolhttps://synapsecounseling.comDr. H and BFTAhttps://www.craigheacockmd.com

Dr. H finds a trove of patient letters from the last 15 years and shares three of the most poignant, using each as a springboard for lessons learned.Dr. H and BFTAhttps://www.craigheacockmd.comhttps://twitter.com/bftapod?lang=en

After a difficult final year of high school, Tessa hoped and prayed that her youngest son would make the transition to college and find a way to thrive. He would be only an hour away, he wanted to go, and she was hopeful that getting a new start there could reverse whatever was happening to him. Yet just two months into his freshman year, it was apparent that he was sinking fast into a maelstrom of panic, body dysmorphia, delusions, and hopelessness. This is Tessa's story of trying to find the strength, and eventually, the self-compassion, to both find help for her son as well as work through her own guilt and shame.Book recommendation (from Tessa)The Stressed Years of Their Lives: Helping Your Kid Survive and Thrive During Their College YearsBFTA and Dr. Hhttps://www.craigheacockmd.com

Trauma embeds in the complex zone between body and spirit, deep within the realm of primary consciousness. The typical psychiatric approaches of meds and talk therapy rarely access these unconscious realms. In prior episodes of BFTA, we have heard accounts of healing these deep wells of trauma with EMDR, psilocybin, and MDMA-- this episode highlights the unexpected power of a loving teacher and a guided spiritual practice.Jeff Finlin, a Colorado-based singer/songwriter and recovery coach, shares his story of recovery after recovery, accessing his embodied trauma and deeper self years into sobriety, through a practice of the breath and self-compassion.Jeff Finlinhttps://www.jefffinlin.comBack from the Abyss and Dr. Hhttps://www.craigheacockmd.comOn Twitter @bftapod

In the first half of this two part mini-episode, Dr. H explores the four stages where fully dissociative doses of ketamine can get a little rocky:  *reaching escape velocity*re-entry*dissociative shatter*post-session processingWhat if a psychiatrist were allowed to ask only one question at a session....what might that be? In the second part of this episode, Dr. H ties together sleep, mood, hormone cycling, friendships, work, circadian rhythm, addiction, and dogs vs cats into just one question.Comments, suggestions, questions? We'd love to hear them! Email us via https://www.craigheacockmd.com or message us on Twitter @bftapodIf you haven’t already, please do write us a review!

Saj Razvi (of Innate Path and Psychedelic Somatic Institute) returns to BFTA to help Craig do a deep dive into listener questions. Have questions you want us to address in a future episode? Email them via craigheacockmd.com or message on Twitter @bftapodPsychedelic Somatic Institutepsychedelicsomatic.orgVideo showing somatic/primary consciousness trauma work catalyzed by THChttps://vimeo.com/442544334

We typically think of addiction as a symptom of a deeper issue, such as trauma or a psychiatric disorder. Sometimes, however, addiction is the main event, and powerlessness is the starting point, not some ambiguous distant stop on the substance abuse train.Lena fell hard into addiction by sixth grade and by all rights should have been dead or imprisoned long ago.  Yet today she is fully alive, deeply grateful, and six years clean and sober.Dr. H and Lena explore her journey out of darkness and the varied and often surprising roles that jail, a caring probation officer, Suboxone, and a seemingly random visit by two near strangers all combined to help her change the course of her life.Dr. H and Back from the Abysshttps://www.craigheacockmd.comOn Twitter @bftapod

Step inside Dr. H's office to eavesdrop on a therapy session with his patient Jasmine (from the Delta Flight Attendant episode in season 1).  This session explores an extremely painful but ultimately transformative relationship that Jasmine had with a much older man just prior to starting therapy. Relationships are human growth machines, and Dr. H and Jasmine unpack what she learned about idealization, her defaulting to black/white thinking, setting boundaries, what it means to be a "friend", and assigning guilt and blame/shame. Dr. H/ Back from the Abysshttps://www.craigheacockmd.comOn Twitter @bftapod

Season 2 is here! We kick off our new season with Dr. H going deep into the immediate aftermath of losing four patients and his eventual path back into the light. Save this one for when you are in the right headspace. Dr. H and Back from the Abysshttp://craigheacockmd.comOn Twitter @bftapod

Can a podcast have an identical twin separated at birth? If so, then "Inside Eyes" might possibly  be that long lost twin of BFTA. Laura Mae Northrup is the creator of Inside Eyes and a trauma therapist in the Oakland area. She put a ton of work into these moving stories of healing from childhood sexual trauma with entheogens and psychedelics. She is planning to soon feature a favorite BFTA episode on her show, while Dr. H picked this one as a favorite. This episode is the story of Shan, an NYC tattoo artist who found unexpected healing from her sexual abuse and rheumatoid arthritis through ayahuasca.  It's truly a mind-blowing and moving memoir. Website: www.InsideEyesPodcast.comInstagram: @lauramaenorthrup Twitter: @inside__eyesFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/LauraMaeNorthrup

Self-described podcast junkie Dr. H reached out to Sarah Buino, host of the excellent podcast Conversations with a Wounded Healer, and they agreed to do this super nifty episode swap, in which Sarah will feature a favorite BFTA episode on her show, and Dr. H chose a favorite episode to feature here.  In this episode Sarah interviews one of the more thoughtful and compelling people in the podcast universe, Dr. Hillary McBride (of both The Liturgists and Other People's Problems). They explore Hillary's journey of healing and how this informs her current work as a therapist and researcher. Dr. H interviewed on Conversations with a Wounded Healerhttps://headhearttherapy.com/114-craig-heacock-back-from-the-abyss-with-psychedelic-assisted-psychotherapy/Subscribe to Conversations with a Wounded Healer!https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/conversations-with-a-wounded-healer/id1356225272Conversations with a Wounded Healer home pagehttps://headhearttherapy.com/podcast/IG: @headhearttherapyFB: @woundedhealr and @headhearttherapyTwitter: @woundedhealr and @HeadHeart_Chi

BFTA's two co-conspirators sit down together for a look back at the first year-- the origin story, highlights, points of gratitude, mistakes made, Craig's most poignant/painful moment, the Enneagram, and Chris' desert island albums (no Meat Loaf!)Back from the Abysshttps://www.craigheacockmd.com

In this second of a two part exploration of OCD, Dr. H and Dr. Amy Indermuehle, a Colorado-based OCD expert, deconstruct Erin's treatment. Dr. Amy is a big fan of in vivo exposures, whether that be watching stomach-churning Youtube videos, touching forbidden items at Target, or riding out the anxiety wave in a public bathroom. Dr. Amy highlights how OCD treatment is so different from typical psychotherapy for anxiety and why so many therapists default to the much more comfortable (but counterproductive) option of trying to help patients soothe their nervous systems. OCD is arguably the most-missed psychiatric diagnosis, for reasons that Dr. H and Dr. Amy explore. OCD is often mistaken for generalized anxiety or for bipolar disorder, with the unceasing obsessions being mislabeled as racing thoughts, and the frantic compulsions as mania. Dr. Amy Indermuehlehttp://facemyanxiety.comExposure and response preventionhttps://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2016/10/exposure-response-prevention-for-ocd/505538/Meds for OCDhttps://iocdf.org/about-ocd/ocd-treatment/meds/Exposure therapy and OCD-related disordershttp://jonabram.web.unc.edu/files/2012/07/Abramowitz-Jacoby-2014-misuse-of-exposure.pdfDr. H and Back from the Abysshttps://www.craigheacockmd.comOn Twitter @bftapod

The postpartum period is by far the most psychiatrically vulnerable time in a woman's life. Erin had always some some mildly annoying obsessive-compulsive tendencies, but they were never a major factor in her life, until just after her daughter was born. Almost immediately she was flooded with horrific violent images and urges, these then morphed into a paralyzing dread of viral contamination. This is the first of two parts. This episode is Erin's story of learning to lean directly into her fears, the next episode will be Dr. H and Dr. Amy Indermuehle, an OCD expert and Erin's therapist, deconstructing Erin's treatment and how exposure therapy helped her to reclaim her life. Postpartum OCDhttps://iocdf.org/expert-opinions/postpartum-ocd/https://www.postpartumdepression.org/postpartum-depression/types/ocd/Exposure and response preventionhttps://iocdf.org/about-ocd/ocd-treatment/erp/Dr. Hhttps://www.craigheacockmd.comOn Twitter @bftapod