Make your own Big Leap
Ever found a book that seemed to contain all the secrets you’ve been struggling to unlock and then have that book pop into your life right when you need it the most? That’s how I felt when I cracked open the spine of The Big Leap, one of thirty books written by my guest Gay Hendricks. Gay earned his degree in Counseling Psychology from Stanford University and has been a leader in the field of relationship transformation and body-mind therapy for more than forty-five years. I’ve come to truly believe that one of the biggest business breakthroughs will happen on the heels of a personal breakthrough. Your business breakthroughs are almost always if not always related to personal breakthroughs and the central theme of The Big Leap confirms this.
Upper limit: In The Big Leap Gay Hendricks puts forth the idea that most human beings have an upper limit. We have a glass ceiling, a set point for happiness. The moment you hit that glass ceiling (which is invisible unless you go looking for it) you will find a way to self sabotage and bring your happiness level down to something that’s a little more comfortable.
The Big Leap: Gay Hendricks first discovered the upper limit problem in himself when he was thirty. He began to become aware that when things would be going well he would find some way to sabotage himself so that he came back down to where he was before or worse. In working with clients in his therapy practice he began to look for this and found that’s pretty much a universal human concern. This led him into figuring out exactly why this occurs and The Big Leap is the result of what he discovered over the next thirty years.
Unique ability: Every human being if they are sensitive to themselves and begin to inquire gently and mindfully into themselves will discover they have one really unique ability. This will be something that they are so attuned to and good at that it becomes an effortless way of expressing their true genius in the world.
There’s a phrase from one of the gospels that didn’t make it into the official Bible, the Gospel of Thomas. It says “If you bring forth what is within you, what is within you will save you. But if you don’t bring forth what is within you, what is within you will destroy you.” We are both beckoned by and fear the expression of our fullest potential, the big fears deep in ourselves.
Extreme circumstances: Everyone, no matter where they are in life can find areas where they are limiting themselves about how happy they could be. It hasn’t been tested out whether someone can be happy in extreme circumstances but most situations in life are not that dire. Most of us manage to keep ourselves miserable even in circumstances where we don’t need to be miserable.
Four Big Fears
- Fear of outshining other people. This fear often comes to us as children when we compare ourselves to our brothers and sisters.
- Fear of creating more burden. The yearning to do something beyond what you’re doing now but not doing it is resisting the added burden to your life. This fear is not based in reality and can evaporate once you begin to work with it a bit.
- Fear of leaving behind or being disloyal to people who were there for you in your past.
- Fear that something is fundamentally wrong with you. You haven’t really done anything wrong but it’s something someone accused you of so you take on this guilt as if you’ve committed some imaginary crime.
Einstein time: Someone once asked Einstein to explain the theory of relativity in simple terms. He responded “An hour with your beloved goes by like a minute, but a minute sitting on a hot stove goes by like an hour.” If you’re in a painful situation you’re trying to withdraw from the experience and in the act of withdrawing time slows down and becomes a factor. When you’re with your beloved your cells are wide open and you’re experiencing the flow of love and time becomes irrelevant. When you find out you’re resisting time that’s a sign that you’re not tapped into your genius.
- Visit Gay Hendricks website at www.hendricks.com
- The Big Leap, Conscious Loving Ever After, Lasting Love and Five Wishes are available in audio format on audible.com or you can find any one of Gay’s 30 books on Amazon or at your local bookstore.
- If you would like to read my own review of The Big Leap you can find it on my blog at geetanadkarni.com. The post is titled The Best Book I Read in 2015 and Why You Should Read it Too.
- I love hearing from you. I’m @lifewithgeeta on Twitter. If you want a peek into my personal life here at Baby Got Booked HQ follow me on Instagram where my handle is Baby Got Booked. You can reach out to me via email or via my website contact form at geetanadkarni.com