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Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog

108 Episodes

7 minutes | Jan 1, 2023
Breath of the Mild: A Yonder: The Cloud Catcher Chronicles Review | Attack the Backlog
Hello everyone. This here episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Yonder: The Cloud Catcher Chronicles, a game at least somewhat inspired by Breath of the Wild, where you’re thrown into an unknown world after shipwrecking on an island filled with copy and paste humans and seven different colors of foxes. You get your own farm, collect a plethora of resources, and wonder why you’re doing any of the things you’re doing the whole time you’re playing. But don't just take my word for it, take my video (and audio) too, why don't you.
10 minutes | Dec 18, 2022
There Has Never Been a More Accurate Title: A Need for Speed Payback Review | Attack the Backlog
Hello everyone. This here episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Need for Speed Payback, a racing game released in 2017 that feels like it was made in 1917, not directed by Sam Mendes, who surely sendes his regards to moi for the payback endured while playing Payback, also known as, “Yet Another Need for Speed game,” no one remembers because they all started blending together post-Most Wanted and, even among the blended, Payback is far from the one most want to play. But don't just take my word for it, take my video (and audio), too...
8 minutes | Dec 4, 2022
A Far Cry From a Good Time: A Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon Review | Attack the Backlog
Hey there everyone! This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon, a standalone bite-sized Far Cry that offered a cyberific experience full of 80s vibes and supposedly good times; however, good times were not had and that's not because Blood Dragon is bad, but worse than bad: it's disappointing. What made Blood Dragon disappointing? I guess you'll just have to check out the show to get in the know.
11 minutes | Nov 6, 2022
Sometimes Your First Time Is Best Left as Your Only Time: A Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance Second Run
Hello everyone. This is Second Runs, the series where I, Marc Kusnierz, revisits games I played and loved in the past to see if I still love them today. Will I learn something new, confirm something old, or quickly realize this was all a mistake as I slowly destroy what little bit of nostalgia I have left in this world. No matter the outcome, I’ve accepted the risks and will continue my journey through the opposite of a backlog until I’ve destroyed my soul all in the pursuit of content creation. This episode is all about Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance, a game I adored when it originally came out and was beyond excited to revisit almost 20 years after its original release; however, not everything goes according to plan and, well, just watch the episode and you'll quickly see why.
14 minutes | Oct 23, 2022
A Great Game, but Just an Okay Resident Evil Game: A Resident Evil 7 Review | Attack the Backlog
Hey there everyone! This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Resident Evil 7, the survival horror series’ jump to first-person and return to scares after going down a more action-centric route that started way back with Resident Evil 3. Did I love it? Did I hate it? Did I poop my pants multiple times while I played it? All these questions and more will be answered with a quick watch or listen, so sit back, relax, and enjoy the show.
8 minutes | Oct 9, 2022
Sometimes Third Time's Not the Charm: A Dead Space 3 Review | Attack the Backlog
Hey there everyone! This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Dead Space 3, the followup to Dead Space 2 and...that’s all I got. A lot has been said about Dead Space 3 since its original release, most of it negative; however, when you go back and look at the reviews, you’ll see a wide range of opinions, from those who thought it was amazing--a handful of reviews were very close to giving it a 10/10--to those who thought it was disappointing on all fronts. I can’t say I was disappointed since I went in with no expectations, but I do think it’s an aggressively average and forgettable game and, in some ways, that's worse than being bad-bad.
10 minutes | Sep 26, 2022
Very Pretty and Occasionally Shitty: A Destroy All Humans! Remake Review | Attack the Backlog
Hey there everyone! This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Destroy All Humans!, the 2020 remake of the game of the same name that originally came out back in 2005. Despite doing a lot right and, in many ways, being what I want from most PS2-era remakes, Destroy All Humans! makes a few things worse and, not just a little worse, but a lot worse, leading to incredibly frustrating moments that made me start hating a game I was overall enjoying, but I'll let the episode do the talking for me; after all, that's what it's there for...
14 minutes | Sep 12, 2022
Max Payne Still Fills Me With Max Yays, Even to This Day | Second Runs
Hello everyone. This is Second Runs, the series where I, Marc Kusnierz, revisits games I played and loved in the past to see if I still love them today. Will I learn something new, confirm something old, or quickly realize this was all a mistake as I slowly destroy what little bit of nostalgia I have left in this world. No matter the outcome, I’ve accepted the risks and will continue my journey through the opposite of a backlog until I’ve destroyed my soul all in the pursuit of content creation. And on that note, the content created right here and right now is for none other than Max Payne, the game Marky Mark probably never played before taking on the role of the titular character in what is still one of the worst video game adaptations to date. Now, some 21 years later, I’ve finally revisited the game for the first time, playing through the whole thing in one sitting (with a break for food, mind you, since I’m an adult and won’t let a game be the boss of me) and I’m happy to report, despite some remembered (and not-so-remembered) knocks, Max Payne is still as great today as I remember it being the first time I played it.
11 minutes | Aug 28, 2022
It's Good, Man, But Not Great, Babe: A Rage Review | Attack the Backlog
Hey there everyone! This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Rage, a first-person shooter where you wake up after spending over a century sleeping in a freezer just so you can do everyone’s dirty work for them, Norm MacDonald not included. P.S. Props to anyone who gets the entirety of this episode's title.
9 minutes | Aug 14, 2022
I Made a Terrible, Terrible Mistake: A Dragon Ball Z: Kakarot (Kind Of) Review | Attack the Backlog
Hey there everyone! This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Dragon Ball Z: Kakarot, an open-world action-adventure game set in the world of Dragon Ball that retells the story of Dragon Ball Z in its entirety. If you want to experience Dragon Ball Z a second (or third/etc) time and don’t want to slog through the original series (or even the truncated Kai version), Kakarot is perfect for that. That said, if you did what I did in preparation, you may find yourself disappointed and wishing you had your own set of dragon balls to wish your stupidity away.
11 minutes | Jul 31, 2022
While Not Quite a Zero, It’s Far From a Hero: A Resident Evil 0 Review | Attack the Backlog
Hey there everyone! This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Resident Evil 0, the prequel to Resident Evil starring Rebecca Chambers--aka, not Claire Redfield or Jill Valentine--and cool dude Billy Coen, with his super sweet tribal tattoo that apparently spells out “Motherlove” making me hate it (and him) even more than I already do. Billy hatred aside, 0 is a disappointing experiment that adds nothing of value to the series and, in some ways, takes a little away. At least it still looks great, eh...
6 minutes | Jul 17, 2022
The Mean Greens Is What You Get When You Don't Eat Your Vegetables | Attack the Backlog
Hey there everyone! This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about The Mean Greens - Plastic Warfare--random, I know--a third-person competitive shooter where you play as toy army men and battle across familiar environments like backyards, kitchen tables, and fish tanks. If that sounds interesting to you, check out the episode to find out just how mean these greens be.
11 minutes | Jul 3, 2022
The Mafia Remake Is a Fresh Coat of Paint on a Car in Need of Heavy Tuning | Attack the Backlog
This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Mafia, specifically the Definitive Edition, which is a remake of the original game from 2002. Technically, this is a bit of a cheat episode since I did play the original when it came out, but since this is a full-blown remake, I said, "Fuck it, this is my show, and I can do whatever the heck I want," and whatever the heck I did. Regardless of hecks given or taken, the real question is, is Mafia as good today as it was back in the day and, to answer that...
11 minutes | Jun 5, 2022
Crash Bandicoot Is Anything but a Bandihoot! Amirite, Amiright, or Amiawriter? | Attack the Backlog
On this episode of Attack the Backlog, I crash all the bands in the remake of Crash Bandicoot, a game that's anything but a hoot and more resembling of poo. As bright and colorful as the game may be, it sure made me miserable as you will see. As someone new to the series, it's rather disappointing, 'cause now when it comes to checking out the sequels, I'm more than a little weary. But like with Going Commando, I'm not giving up for good; however, I can't say I'm a fan, yo, with no chubby for Crash, or what some refer to as wood.
16 minutes | May 22, 2022
A Tale of Two Games: An Anguish-Filled Vanquish Review | Attack the Backlog
On this episode of Attack the Backlog, I slide my way through an average game before discovering the game I played is completely different from the game others have played, except the only way to know it's different is by being told it's different. Why? Because the game itself tells you nothing. Confused? Welcome to the club--the, "I played Vanquish, but I didn't really play Vanquish" club--it's quite crowded in here and y'all know how I feel about crowds, so hopefully this episode helps you realize what Vanquish really is before you start playing it yourself, lest you end up like me and annoyed that what you played in a far cry from what others have played.
8 minutes | May 8, 2022
Just 'Cause 3's My Favorite Number Doesn't Mean Just Cause 3's My Favorite Game | Attack the Backlog
On this episode of Attack the Backlog, I blow up everything but dolls in Just Cause 3, a game where you cause mayhem and destruction...just 'cause. This marks a first for Attack the Backlog. This is the first time I've ever gone back into my backlog to finish an old save, instead of restarting a game from the beginning (if it's something I've played before, but never finished). I won't go into further detail here--I have to leave some reason for you to check out the episode (in case my sultry voice isn't enough on its own)--but I will say I 100% made the right decision in choosing to continue my old save instead of starting a new one (and no, not just 'cause).
12 minutes | Apr 24, 2022
How Returnal Went From an All-Time Great to a Game I’d Only Casually Date | Attack the Backlog
On this episode of Attack the Backlog, I go on a roller coaster of love to like with Returnal, a third-person roguelite shooter that takes a lot inspiration from shmups and successfully translates it to a 3D environment. The gameplay is sublime, but because of the way it's structured, the game doesn't respect your time. What could have been one of my favorite games of all-time is, instead, just a game I liked and, well, that's fine.
14 minutes | Apr 10, 2022
I Thought Going Commando Was Supposed to Be One of the Good Ones | Attack the Backlog
On this episode of Attack the Backlog, I return to the world of Ratchet & Clank with Ratchet & Clank: Going Commando. I went in with the highest of expectations and left with the saddest of realizations: I, maybe, don't like Ratchet & Clank. I loved the original game when I played it so many years ago and loved the reboot/remake, but, until now, those were the only Ratchet & Clank games I've played. Going Commando was my return to a series I thought I'd continue loving; however, what I found was a game more interested in quantity over quality. This hasn't killed my interest in playing other Ratchet & Clank games, mind you, but it has stunted the growth of any potential excitement in playing more games in the series. At least for the time being.
15 minutes | Mar 27, 2022
Ghost of Tsushima is Delicious Like Ma's Sushi, Man | Attack the Backlog
On this episode of Attack the Backlog, watch as I duel and reviewel my way through the beautiful forests and valleys of Ghost of Tsushima, a game where you play as a samurai fighting against tradition in order to bring freedom and peace to Japan. If that sounds like your jam, I can't recommend it highly enough. I may sound negative at times in the review, but my experience was unique as outside influences affected me more than usual. Despite all that, I still had a great time, adding yet another win for Sony's secret best studio. Ghost of Tsushima originally came out on July 17, 2020 for PlayStation 4 and has since been released on PlayStation 5.
7 minutes | Mar 13, 2022
Call of Juarez: The What the Hell Were They Thinking One | Attack the Backlog
On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc puts on their best Obama mask and gets high as a kite while burning fields of dreams in Call of Juarez: The Cartel, the kind of dreams that only weed can make true, especially when playing a game that's worst that poo. The Cartel is a bad game in so many ways and the kind of game that leaves you constantly asking why as you play. Call of Juarez: The Cartel originally came out on July 19, 2011, for PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360, with a PC release a few months after that. Marc played the Xbox 360 version of the game on an Xbox Series X via backward compatibility and highly recommends not doing the same.
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