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Andy's Movie Minute
18 minutes | Apr 11, 2014
Episode 57: Underworld Evolution
Underworld Evolution - I give this movie a solid 3 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. For those that need a reminder, that means it's worth watching if it is streaming somewhere, but it isn't worth buying (unless it was in a cheap box set) and it certainly isn't worth paying full price to own. The action was decent and the settings were nice, but the plot was forced and it was more like a video game than an actual drama.
22 minutes | Mar 29, 2014
Episode 56: Lara Craft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life
Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life - I gave this movie a 1.8 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. Not the lowest score I've given, but then again this isn't as bad as Battlefield Earth. It's close though. Real close. Watching this damn near gave me PTSD. This movie is so bad I started leaking brain fluids about half way through. I only bothered covering it because my pal Derek said I was remiss in not doing it since I'd already done the first one. Thanks a lot buddy. Go ahead and open that box I sent you...don't worry if it's ticking...it's just a clock.
17 minutes | Feb 21, 2013
Episode 35: Predator 2
Predator 2 - I give this movie a 2 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. The action was meh, the acting was meh, and the age of the movie stood out like a fart in an elevator.
23 minutes | Feb 9, 2013
Episode 34: Predator
Predator - I rate this movie a 3 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. It's a classic piece of 1980's action but it falls apart pretty quickly once apply a little logic and/or common sense.
14 minutes | Jan 21, 2013
Episode 33: Knowing
Knowing - I give this movie a 3.5 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. For a Nick Cage movie, those are pretty high marks! I also give this extra credit because it was a total surprise to me. It's hard to find movies that are so far off the radar that you've never had the ending spoiled or that you've never at least heard some mention of. This was that movie - that one, singular moment in time when you have no idea a movie existed and you watch it for the first time, with childlike wonder. And to make it even better, it didn't even poop the bed (so to speak). Well played, Knowing, well played.
15 minutes | Jan 9, 2013
Episode 32: Salt
Salt - I give this movie a 4.2 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. I know that's pretty generous but I rather enjoyed the movie for the action and the twists. More than that, the DVD I got in the $5 bin at Walmart had 3 versions on it: The theater version, the extended cut, and the director's cut. You can look online to find the subtle differences but for the most part, whole scenes at the end are either changed or removed completely as well as some changes in the middle of the movie. None of them make a huge difference in the outcome but I went with the unrated director's cut because....c'mon. Unrated director's cut.
16 minutes | Jan 1, 2013
Episode 31: Battleship
Battleship - I give this movie a 3 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. It had an almost perfect combination of aliens, the US Navy, and apocalyptic scenarios but it fell flat on its face because they went soft instead of gnarly. If they had gone the same route as Battle Los Angeles with gritty, realistic action and if they'd allowed some cursing, some blood and gore, and some good old fashioned nudity this might just be one of my favorite movies of all time. Instead it is just okay. Hell, I don't even know if I'd buy it from the $5 bin.
24 minutes | Dec 20, 2012
Episode 30: Battlefield Earth
Battlefield Earth - anyone that has seen this before won't be surprised that I am giving this a 1 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. This is the lowest I have graded a movie in 30 episodes and this "movie" deserves it. My bones still ache with the pain of seeing this twice in less than a century.
12 minutes | Dec 9, 2012
Episode 29: Push
Push - I give this movie a 2 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. I paid $5 for it at Walmart but I won't be watching it again unless I have guests over and they ask me "What's a terrible movie we could watch? Not the worst movie of course - not Battlefield Earth, but a really bad one that we should have enjoyed but ultimately won't? Something with star power but absolutely no payoff?" If my guests ask me that specific question, then I will say "I have just the thing" and get out Push. You've been warned.
21 minutes | Dec 2, 2012
Episode 28: Ultraviolet
Ultraviolet - I give this movie a solid 4 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. It's got great action, some leftover Gunkata, and a great dreamy surrealistic feel. Oh, and Milla Jovovich.
20 minutes | Nov 25, 2012
Episode 27: District 9
District 9 - I give this movie a solid 4 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. It kept me guessing until the very end and although it left me a little wanting, it more than made up for some plot issues with sheer grittiness.
19 minutes | Nov 17, 2012
Episode 26: Prometheus
Prometheus - I gave this movie a 4.1 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. Sure, there were some plot issues but the cinematography was great and the sci-fi action/thriller/horror genre was firmly represented.
36 minutes | Nov 11, 2012
Episode 25: Independence Day
Independence Day - I give this movie a 2.8 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. Giving it a 3 is too generous and it is at least better than a 2, so I'll say 2.8 because, hey! What are you going to do about it? That's what I thought...punk ass.
15 minutes | Oct 21, 2012
Episode 24: Twelve Monkeys
Twelve Monkeys - I give this movie a 3 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. Not my favorite Terry Gilliam movie, but far from his worst. It's dark, creepy, confusing, and chock full of things that make you feel like the whole thing is a dream/nightmare...it's a lot like having kids actually.
17 minutes | Oct 14, 2012
Episode 23: Deep Impact
Deep Impact - It is your basic apocalyptic scenario, but it lacks the tension to be a thriller and lacks the ball-slapping Kung Fu or aliens to be an action movie, so it's in the Drama category. Because of that I give it a solid 4 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. Like Armageddon, it's a good movie and worthy of rewatching but you watch it for the people and the scenery, not for the action or scares.
17 minutes | Oct 7, 2012
Episode 22: Equilibrium
Equilibrium - I give this movie a 3.9 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. I'd give it a 4 but it just didn't quite hit the mark for me. Feel free to debate with me on this! Convince me and I'll score it higher (this goes for any of the movies).
14 minutes | Sep 29, 2012
Episode 21: The Raid – Redemption
The Raid: Redemption - I rate this movie a 3.1 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability - the plot was thick enough to enjoy, but too thin for much poking at. If you haven't seen this movie, I highly recommend it! If you like movies like Ip Man, this is perfect for you!
14 minutes | Sep 21, 2012
Episode 20: Lara Croft – Tomb Raider
Lara Croft: Tomb Raider - I give this movie a 2 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. I'm not a Lara Croft fanboy and I've never played the game, so I could care less about the movie.
21 minutes | Sep 12, 2012
Episode 19: 2012
2012 - I rate this movie a 3 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. It's got great action and the CGI effects are brilliant, BUT it lacks the ability to be watched repeatedly in a year. It just doesn't have enough zest to keep it fresh over multiple viewings. Maybe once a year? And even then I think I might lose interest. Maybe I'm too picky. Maybe the scale is flawed. Maybe you should mind your own damn business!
15 minutes | Sep 3, 2012
Episode 18: AVP – Alien vs. Predator
AVP - This stinker rates a 2 on the Andy Scale of Movie Watchability. Ugh. It hurt me just to record this one.
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