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America's Favorite Elderly Heterosexual Expatriate Humorist

26 Episodes

3 minutes | Oct 7, 2018
In This Moment of Monsters
The poison is poured, the bridges are burned The sham tribunal’s been adjourned No progress made. No lesson learned in this moment of monsters Camels can’t pass through needles’ eyes If their lips are moving lies are being told. They polarise in this moment of monsters The rich do what amuses them The poor do what they must The rich feast on rare creatures’ flesh The poor fight for a crust And horde whatever coins they find in the toxic dust The jury’s out, the fix in sin Your jaw will drop. Your head will spin Play by the rules? You’ll never win! in this moment of monsters The chips are down, their motives clear The cost of justice is so dear The jury will contain no peer in this moment of monsters
4 minutes | Sep 7, 2018
Groupies, and How to Please Them Sexually
The title says it all!
4 minutes | Aug 23, 2018
Further Adventures of the Scrotum Bros.
Avid Trump supporters Anyl and Feekle Scrotum turn out not to be just brothers, but father and son too!
4 minutes | Aug 23, 2018
The Inauguration of Donald Trump
At the time I wrote and recorded this, there seemed little chance that America would be so foolish as to elect this ghastly person. Were those the days, or what?
5 minutes | Aug 16, 2018
Gustavo's Forehead
A poignant bedtime story about why one should avoid the homeless. Based on a true story!
3 minutes | Aug 15, 2018
Mike Pence at the Fertility Clinic
In an attempt to fill the world with rosy-cheeked Christian kiddies, Vice President Pence has, with the encouragement of his wife Judy, whose real name isn't Judy at all, but Karen, been "donating" at Indiana Christian fertility clinics whose names and addresses this podcast is forbidden to disclose.
3 minutes | Aug 13, 2018
At the Ball Park
Join the dopamine-deficient community as they had for the ball park for another afternoon of a sport not easily determined! Buy me some peanuts 'n' crackerjack!
4 minutes | Aug 13, 2018
Anger Management for Transgenders
The title says it all! You'll laff 'til you stop!
2 minutes | Aug 13, 2018
Another Day At the Ballpark
The title says it all!
2 minutes | Aug 5, 2018
Run, Melania, Run
America's Eva Braun or a decent human being caught in a difficult position? You be the judge!
5 minutes | Jul 30, 2018
Sacha Barron Trump
No heart will fail to be warmed by this account of how, when he's pretending to play golf, President Trump is typically camping with his handsome youngest son, teaching the boy to revere nature and to respect even those unlike himself.
4 minutes | Jul 30, 2018
Pregame
A pregame interview with a famous athlete! But what is his sport?
4 minutes | Jul 28, 2018
More McDougal!
Karen McDougal's relationship turns out to have been less about sex than service to humanity. This one will inspire you.
4 minutes | Jul 26, 2018
I Google McDougal!
For nine months shortly after the birth of his son Bannon, future president Donald G. Trump enjoyed hot extramarital sex with Playboy model Karen McDougal, who has explained that she loved him for his mind and his charm. Think about that for a minute. His mind. ,
3 minutes | Jul 25, 2018
The Elements of Style
There are lots of fragrance cachet-laden magazines that will tell you how to dress, but this is where you'll get the best possible advice!
4 minutes | Jul 23, 2018
Feekle and Anyl
It was my friends Feekle and Anyl, whom I met in the American heartland in 2009, who originally got me excited about Donald G. Trump
4 minutes | Jul 21, 2018
Poots 'n' Tubby
A lot of people are saying that the best thing to come out of the recent summit meeting in Helsinki between Presidents Trump and Putin was the idea for a new comedy series on Fox, in which each leader would try to demonstrate himself more manly than the other — with hilarious results!
4 minutes | Jul 12, 2018
MrTrump
Santa Monica Slim & The Poisoned Environment Boys, bolstered by the Zelda Hyde Exclusively Caucasian Singers, perform their musical tribute to Donald J. Trump. Lyrics copyright 2018 by John Mendelssohn: God took an orange dump and called it Donald Trump Please off a high cliff jump, Mr. Trump You wear defiant ignorance as some might wear medals Your world’s full of lies, pots called black by kettles From ghastly to awful, you cover the spectrum How does it feel having Mike Pence up your rectum? You live in a world of gold leaf, all bejewelled Beloved of numbskulls. So easily fooled! You deadbeat, you con man, you liar, you villain You stubborn infection. We need penicillin How weird that he should be embraced by lovers of the Bible Tell the truth about the man and he’ll shouting, “Libel!” With asshats quite unqualified and nincompoops not vetted The swamp you promised that you’d drain has just become more fetid You’re vulgar and stupid, a coward and bully we loathe you not partially but quite fully Your necktie’s too long, your attention span short one wishes your mom had seen fit to abort You fecal stain on history. You foul abomination To shake your sweaty little hand’s to risk contamination
1 minutes | Jul 12, 2018
Loving The Rich
The rich are different from you and me. They smell nicer, for one thing, and usually have a great deal more money. Many of them have been to something called "finishing school", and have correspondingly lovely manners.
3 minutes | Jul 12, 2018
Kill Something For Christ, Quick
Those who don't go out into the wild and shoot their fellow living creatures dead often have no idea what they're missing!
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