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Josh and Jess talk train vandals, snake ambushes, the best contraception commercial ever, and when trusting a companion goes terribly wrong.

Josh and Jess discuss the perils of sedentary employment, the dangers of not having tissues for sneeze emergency, and the terror that is a tattling neighbor.

Jess and Josh discuss how to deal with assailants on the subway, equestrian relationship drama, and a lookout forgetting the caffeine.

Jess and Josh talk about drug dealing in California, the worst places for public trysts, and Burger King's greatest hero.

Jess and Josh discuss the great pink bicycle escape, and a persistent dog lover wins the day.

Josh and Jess discuss gentrification and how to manage crime in America.

Jess and Josh discuss a dildo assault, a prostitute robber, international clitoris week, and what happens when your wife goes to the strip club with you.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss a Barnes and Noble bathroom, where to not keep illegal wares, a serious discussion about animal relations, and an excellent reason to wrap it up.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss a passionate mother on the bus and robotic trap children.

Josh and Jess talk the basics of criminal activity, a preacher with an interesting method of spreading the word of God and a story of a sexual attack that portions of the chatroom took offense to how it was discussed on the show..

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss water-born gifts, April fools, and proper hygiene.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss the perfect robbery, the perfect cop impersonator, and the perfect chef.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss two women that really want their beer and whether a dog can be a snitch.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss relationships, and discuss varying philsophies regarding littering.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss lotion in all of its many variations, and the historical context and contemporary relevance of snitchin'.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss proper colonic health, a jam-packed police search, and a discussion of the journalistic value of Worldst-WE DO NOT CONDONE WORLDSTAR HIP-HOP.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss hot button issues that get to the core of the American psyche and help to hash out a new, fresh understanding of our changing, global society. Like bestiality.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss the Oscars, Jess explains the A**hole game, and positive life advice from our hosts.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss Jesse Jackson Jr.'s Michael Jackson cosplay, Jess answers listener emails, and strip club stories to enrich our lives.

The Purveyors of Ratchet discuss slapping babies, a murderous threesome, and alternative swimming lessons.