Surrounded by Idiots Radio Podcast
About This Show
The Walk of Shame Radio Podcast has been transformed into the Millennial one stop shop for relationship and dating insights, life hacks, and all other info deemed fit for Millennial ears. Welcome to the Surrounded by Idiots Radio Podcast. Tony Dufresne, Ph.D., Millennial Mentor, Peak Performance Coach and reluctant Gen X'er, talks all things "Millennial"...the specific topics that Millennials face everyday (life, love, money, student loans, online dating, successful relationships, finding yourself, being true to yourself, how to communicate with stuffy Gen X'ers, etc.). And, when you're surrounded by idiots, Tony and his special guests will throw you a life line so you can rise above the unwashed masses and live life on your own terms. I guarantee, this show will 3 "E" your brains out (Entertain, Educate and Enlighten). Welcome, you sexy Millennial...
Most Recent Episode
How to Trust Without Getting Hurt
2 days ago
With the fact that the Millennial Generation is the most untrusting generation ever recorded, this week, Lexi and I wanted to answer the question, "How to Trust Without Getting Hurt".
Trust is what bonds us to other people and allows us to feel safe so we can be vulnerable enough to connect.
Usually people fall into one of two groups…they either give trust at the beginning (allowing someone else to choose whether to honor it or not), or hold it back, making others “earn” it.
Problem with broken trust is you’re just as pissed at yourself for your bad decision to trust them as much as you are at the person (or institution) that betrayed you.
Understanding all of these points, I wanted to talk about Why Millennials, in general, are the most untrusting generation of recorded history and how you, as an individual Millennial, can authentically “trust” in today’s upside down world without ending up getting hurt in the process.
To set the stage, I want to mention a couple of good articles about Millennials and trust.
Big Think article by Paul Taylor: "Millennials are the Most Cautious Generation We've Ever Seen" and a great article was from the Washington Post, titled, "Millennials Don't Trust Anyone. That's a Big Deal" (links to the articles available in the show notes located on my website, javabud.com)
The Key to Trusting without getting hurt is: Perspective
The reason we feel the hurt is because we chose to believe in something that ended up not being real. And, in order to live in that belief, we gave a little of ourselves, we became vulnerable…opening ourselves up to a “sense” of being uncomfortably exposed. And when we are betrayed, it feels as though the person or institution that was the one we wanted to protect us the most, was the one that stuck a big stick in an exposed wound…which then leads to the double-whammy impact of being betrayed as well as being pissed at yourself for allowing it to happen…which then leads to a knee-jerk reaction of building an even bigger wall around your vulnerability, so you’ll never have to feel that devastated ever again…because if it did happen again, you have a feeling like you wouldn’t be able to survive it.
This entire trust-betrayal-devastation-building more emotional protection cycle is real…it’s legit, however, it is entirely a product of letting your Ego reaction control your reality. Because, it’s the Ego’s job to “protect” you, it wants to be sure that you fe