How to Find Friends Introduction – Someone To Show Me “How” I don’t know if you’re like me, but I like someone to show me how to do some things before I try them. For example, as a therapist, I know how important deep breathing and progressive muscle relaxation is for helping people reduce physical and mental stress. (see here and here for scientific research about the benefits) I had read about how to these exercises, but nothing quite helped me as much as watching a couple of videos of psychologists teaching these exercises to kids. The psychologists, from the University of North Carolina, had received lots of training and guidance in these exercises. At some point in life we all struggle to find friends. A big thanks to my friend Marc who gave me a book by Dr. Elizabeth Laugeson, PsyD, author of The Science of Making Friends: Helping Socially Challenged Teens and Young Adults Dr. Laugeson and her colleagues show us how to find friends. She and her team of researchers at the UCLA PEERS groups have studied social skills and “what works” in creating friendships. They have broken down seemingly complex social skills from what people call an “art” to more of a “science.” Here’s what Dr. Laugeson says: Although it may be true that some have a natural knack for conversational arts, it’s not necessarily true that all social skills are hardwired or fixed. What if conversational skills, and more broadly social skills, were not an art but a science?